parents paying for horses

I have paid towards my boy since i got my job on the yard, i absolutely loved paying for him, it made me feel good thinking i was saving my mum just short of 300 a month, and this was me only working, technically part time while i was at school, and worked every day that i could, now at uni, and only working one day a week due to being a student nurse and spending 5 days a week on placement cant work any more hours, i pay the same amount as i used to and if im stuck for anything i know i can go to mum for help, she's always supported me if i need help, all she pays for at the moment is the trailer insurance and taz's insurance, hopefully one day in three years time, i can take over both of them too.
 
i'm 14 and get £20 maybe £30 a month from my mum then the nrest i make up with pocket money from aunt, mucking out for a friend and giving lessons to my cousen (10 quid a go :D) so pay most myself really and also my mum pays for insurance.
 
I can't stand people who let mummy and daddy pay for their ponies, in my experience these people are the most ungrateful[/QUOTE]

See my post above. I really do not believe my daughter is ungrateful (see her post above too:p). I think it depends on your relationship and how you arrange things.
This has been my choice and she has always contributed more than I ask. She has never taken the mickey and the day she does is the day I will stop. I do not think that will happen. I know quite a few mums and daughters who actually enjoy spending their horsey time together. (Well I think she enjoys it:cool:). I do not think you can generalise like that.
 
I got my first horse when i was 16, dad paid for him but he moaned about it so i got a part time job to help. Now i have a full time job i pay for mostly everything but dad still puts money towards it as my wee sister (15) rides her to.
 
This thread has made me giggle!
I am in my 50s and 3 yrs ago my parents bought my IDx after I had to have my Clydie pts as an emergency.
The day we agreed to buy her, sister and I went to Robinson's and on the way back, having left the SatNav in the car boot, we saw a trailer with 'sponsored by Daddy' on the side. This made us laugh so much that we missed the turning for home and ended up at the wrong side of the M60, well on our way down the M6 before we realised and then had to find an exit where we could turn round.
TBF, we do keep his mare here and pay for just about everything she needs.
 
I can't stand people who let mummy and daddy pay for their ponies, in my experience these people are the most ungrateful

See my post above. I really do not believe my daughter is ungrateful (see her post above too:p). I think it depends on your relationship and how you arrange things.
This has been my choice and she has always contributed more than I ask. She has never taken the mickey and the day she does is the day I will stop. I do not think that will happen. I know quite a few mums and daughters who actually enjoy spending their horsey time together. (Well I think she enjoys it:cool:). I do not think you can generalise like that.[/QUOTE]

Did I not say in my experience??? I didn't say these people are the most ungrateful which is generalising. My comments are based on my personal life, and the kids I have come into contact with who don't pay a penny, and never worked a day in their life to support their horse are incredibly ungrateful.

In my relationship with my mum she would happily pay for everything but it was my decision that I should pay as he is my horse. We still enjoy horsey time together, her not paying out for him doesn't alter this. :D
 
Tricky: I think a child doing A Levels ought to be working to fund the horse. It's hard if a parent has always paid: can you suddenly demand that the child take full responsibility?

It thoroughly annoys me to see some younger owners taking the mick at the yard and getting everything on a plate-took me til I was 37 to get my own horse cos my parents would never have forked out the cash for it when I was a kid!
 
I can't stand people who let mummy and daddy pay for their ponies, in my experience these people are the most ungrateful

See my post above. I really do not believe my daughter is ungrateful (see her post above too:p). I think it depends on your relationship and how you arrange things.
This has been my choice and she has always contributed more than I ask. She has never taken the mickey and the day she does is the day I will stop. I do not think that will happen. I know quite a few mums and daughters who actually enjoy spending their horsey time together. (Well I think she enjoys it:cool:). I do not think you can generalise like that.[/QUOTE]

Actually, I know many parents who think that it is money well spent, they know where their teenage daughters are, what they are doing and who they are doing it with, without having to labour the point.
 
Actually, I know many parents who think that it is money well spent, they know where their teenage daughters are, what they are doing and who they are doing it with, without having to labour the point.[/QUOTE]


Money well spent? True, as a teenager my mum contributed some costs to allow me to keep a horse but what about teenagers who don't have to pay for everything? Don't you think thats just setting them up for a life of comfort.. instead of paying for their horses they can spend their money on alcohol and fags? counterproductive.

I worked hard for my horse and it done me the world of good
 
My OH's parents stopped paying for his horse when he graduated and got his first job.

However, obviously they would never let the horse starve so they do bail him out occasionally. xxxx
 
I've never had my own horse but after I persuaded my parents to let me ride (took a few years :rolleyes: ), I had to pay for my own riding lessons by doing extra chores around the house e.g. in the summer, painting the garden fence, cleaning the car (the car never looked so clean :D ) and by doing this I could afford lessons about every 2 weeks. After about a year and when the first riding school I went to closed down, my parents saw I was serious about continuing with riding and as this also coincided with my Dad getting a slightly better paid job, they paid for my weekly lessons ever since (until I went to uni). When I got a share horse last year, I paid for him (only paid 1/2 shoes anyway), paid parents for petrol money and for my own competition entries etc.
Their thinking was that they would pay for me and my brother to do one sport each (we could do more but had to pay for ourselves) as long as we were in full time education.
Constantly looking forward to the day when I can have my own horse, practically counting down! :D
 
My parents pay for most things at the moment for their upkeep but there are many things, which had they not happened, would mean it wouldn't be possible to have the ponies. We have the ponies at home and if we didn't, we couldn't have them. I've also been very lucky that a couple of family members, other than my parents, are very supportive and interested in my riding so have made some very generous donations which allowed us to buy my boy :D. He only came with a saddle, a bit and 3 rugs, so my mum paid for the necessary things (bridle, martingale, buckets, numnah, a pair of brushing boots and a few other rugs). I now have to pay for anything else I want with birthday/pocket money but parents pay for feed/hay and a weekly lesson/competition. I'm really grateful for how much my parents and family support me, so I plan to help with the bills as soon as I can, but due to where we live I cannot really get a job until I can drive.
 
I always had to buy hay/food and stuff for them out of winnings we had from competitions from the age of about 12. I was able to keep my horses for free at my mums house until i was 16 and had a part time job, then I had a small amount of livery in with my rent. When I bought my own house and moved out properly (ie not uni, I left for Uni then came back lol) at 23 the horses were evicted too and I had to rent land for them :D
 
our ponies were always kept at home so no livery and they were good doers eating grass and hay only the actual costs were very low. parents paid for everything but my parents felt that ponies were a good thing to have as they teach responsibility and they also thought if i got into ponies then it might stop me getting into drink, drugs, boys and keep me out of trouble and it worked very well. I was incredibly well behaved as a teenager and never wanted to go on holiday or stay out late at weekends as I was obsessed with riding, until my parents sold my pony (I was devastated) and I went to uni and I made up for it!

i had a break from horse ownership and rode at riding schools and shared until I had paid off my students debts and earn enough money to buy and keep another pony which took till age 35 when I bought a 5 yr old new forest pony.

my parents don't contribute as in give me money every month towards his keep but they did give me some money when my gran died which was enough to pay the livery bills and feed bills for a year (I have put this in savings account) and they have said that should I loose my job due to redundancy and then got into financial difficulty they will pay my horse related costs until I found another job so that I would never have to sell my pony.

A lot of parents help their children out with deposits for houses or letting their children live rent free in their house etc. My parents have always said if they were millionaires with lots of spare money they would give money to me and my sister to spend on what we wanted as we are their children and they want us to be happy and have the best and easiest life possible.

If parents have spare money and want to give it to their children to spend on what they want I don't see why it is a problem. If someone wins the lottery and does not have to work then it does not mean that they do not appreciate the money.
 
My parents could not afford for me to have a horse so maybe that is why I am happy for my daughter to have had what I didn't. I have certainly had a lot of pleasure from her horses. It was also something she was good at. I believe if you are lucky enough to be able to support your children in something they are good at and enjoy - then you probably should. She always handed her winnings over towards diesel etc. She also always paid for the chips:D

She is now an adult and it is a shared pleasure that we both enjoy - why should I not continue to contribute if I can afford to? My husband goes shooting with our son - he "treats" him to a box of cartridages occasionally, he paid for him to come on safari a couple of years ago because we knew it was something he would love - he did. He is very grateful to have had the opportunity. I cannot see why a family cannot share things if everyone is happy with the arrangement.
 
I was only ever allowed a horse on the proviso that I contributed financially, and did the work myself.

So from the age of 14 I worked and paid around half the running costs, as well as purchase costs of my pony. I also looked after him, cycling to the yard most days. I have to say my mum did help out on a semi regular basis, but it was always my responsibility.


When I went to uni I had to sell my horse. I wasn't forced into the decision, but I would never have expected them to continue contributing, and being a penniless student getting into debt for education I certainly couldn't justify the costs of keeping a horse.

I'm 23 now, so I've been horseless for 5 years, and getting my own again does seem like it will be a couple of years away at least. Its really tough, though I've been so lucky to be able to keep riding regularly on other people's horses over the last few years.

However, though in lots of ways I would have loved to have kept my horse through uni, I'm glad that I had to face up to the real world. Its not realistic for a new graduate with barely any money to keep such an expensive luxury as a horse - paying bills has got to come first. It would be a real shock to the system if I'd been supported all this time and then had to come face to face with the reality of the situation.

Anyway the point of this very long ramble is really just this. I think my parents did it the right way. If I had kids that wanted horses I'd expect them to contribute - even if it was just a little bit - because horses are so expensive that having them shouldn't be taken for granted. If they really want them, they'll be prepared to work for it. As far as I'm concerned when they go to uni, that is when they start to live life as an adult, and have to make their own choices about finance.
 
Its not realistic for a new graduate with barely any money to keep such an expensive luxury as a horse - paying bills has got to come first.

Haha if only I was as sensible as you! First thing I did after graduating was go right time to try loaning, now two years on having just paid for a wedding I am for some reason buying a pony, oh my poor husband!
 
I had to work to ride when I was younger, now I have two young daughters myself and bought a 3 year old to bring on myself and for my daughters to ride if they wanted as they grew older. He is now 6 and stands at 13.2hh, my 7 year old has started having lessons on him, to do so she has to muck out both weekend days to earn her 20min lesson.
I cannot afford to have more than one pony on a yard (which we need for the manege) so if both daughters want to ride then the chores will be shared equally and hopefully I will get a chance to ride too!

He is part of our family, if and when the girls get older and want a horse with more potential we will have to re-assess, their involvement will play a large part... watch this space!
 
This presumes that the teenagers are also getting pocket money or has a part time job. As a teenager my parents paid for my pony but I had no income at all no pocket money and no job (I lived in a very rural area and there were no jobs for teenagers within cycling distance). I did manage to get a fruit picking job for a season but this relied on my parents driving me there which they soon got fed up with doing.

I imagine it is even harder now for young people to get jobs and parents if they are able to are helping their children more financially than ever.

I think a lot people who are very negative about financial assistance from parents are perhaps a little jealous as they have not had it and would have liked it, in the same way as I am a little jealous of the ladies at my yard who's husbands pay for everything and they can spend the whole day playing with horses and buy whatever they want. I don't think I am more deserving or better than them because I have to work really hard. Though I do like the freedom of not having to ask for someone else to pay for something even if I knew they were going to say yes all the time!

Don't you think thats just setting them up for a life of comfort.. instead of paying for their horses they can spend their money on alcohol and fags? counterproductive.

I worked hard for my horse and it done me the world of good
 
My parents could not afford for me to have a horse so maybe that is why I am happy for my daughter to have had what I didn't. I have certainly had a lot of pleasure from her horses. It was also something she was good at. I believe if you are lucky enough to be able to support your children in something they are good at and enjoy - then you probably should. She always handed her winnings over towards diesel etc. She also always paid for the chips:D

She is now an adult and it is a shared pleasure that we both enjoy - why should I not continue to contribute if I can afford to? My husband goes shooting with our son - he "treats" him to a box of cartridages occasionally, he paid for him to come on safari a couple of years ago because we knew it was something he would love - he did. He is very grateful to have had the opportunity. I cannot see why a family cannot share things if everyone is happy with the arrangement.

I'm with you MissT.
I can tell you that those youngsters in our RC, who are growing into the nicest people are the ones whose parents are involved in their horsey doings, support them by going to shows etc with them and while I certainly don't know the finer details of their financial affairs appear to be the main contributors to their offspring's horse's upkeep.
I have to say that I completely agree with my Dad, who bought my sister's and my first horse, when I was 19 and took ultimate responsibility for his well-being. We certainly did most of the work but as neither of us drove at the time dad drove us to the stable, especially in the dark or if there was anything heavy to take, which enabled him to keep an eye on the welfare of all of us.
ETA Dad, who is now 83, has just built me a stable for my latest horse, a Westphalian, so is still very much involved -in fact the ID knows him as 'her sponsor'!
 
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Slightly differant arrangement for me, as it was my Gran helping to pay with my horse- she used to pay for his Livery and Hay/Straw. then OH bought me the other horse, and paid the same as my Gran- his Livery and Hay/Straw. Both arrangements came to an end when OH & I bought our house.
 
I am 23 and yes my parents bought me my horse when I was 13 and she is still here and will be in the family till the day she goes to horsey heaven. She is classed as the family pet along with the dogs. She is in my dads name on her passport and mum rides her and has told me she enjoys having the horse to look after and ride.

The horse came to school with me from the age of 13 but when I went to uni she stayed at home for 3 years and in my 4th year she came with me. Even with a part time job there was no way I could afford my rent, her livery and my car so mum contributed to her cost.

I am about to start a 12 month unpaid internship (free accomodation) and mum will continue to pay and care for us. The internship means I move to a new location after 6 months so it isn't really fair on the horse. However come next year I should be in the position to get a paid job and then will be able to bring her with me and try and get mum to let me pay for her keep.

Some people may say I am spoilt but I am very grateful and appreciate that I am very very lucky that I have parents that can afford and willing to pay for my horse. My parents work on the theory that as they can afford to they would rather spend their money on us now whilst we are going through uni rather than us inherit it when they die. As in theory based on mums family she will live till she is late 80s/early 90s and by then sister and I will have established careers and be earning our own money. They would rather spend their money now on us letting us concentrate on our studies without worrying about money. At the same time though if we want to go on holiday with friends/go travelling we have to earn that money. Sister and I both paid for our own driving lessons, car insurance and bought cars with our own money.
 
This summer they are cutting me off, which is fair enough I will be 18 and should get a full-time summer job.

ATM though I pay for any lessons by working for my RI and any extras like new bits of tack etc I save up for and get with my money. It has taught me good money management and I know how luck I am that they are willing to contribute as much as they have.
 
I am pearlsasinger's sister :)
Our parents saw the first (and subseuent horses) as the euivalent of family pets, we were expected to look after them in the same way that we had been expected to look after family dogs etc,
I do think we were very lucky (and still are) in that our father and our late mother were always interested in what we were doing. Before they bought us our first horse, they took us to a riding school, every Sunday and stayed and watched most weeks.
One of the last full family outings before Mum died was at the local RC show, to watch me and my mare compete. Dad still comes to watch and attends fancy dress rides etc. He is 83 and has just built, with my assistance, a new stable for the new horse. The first stable he renovated was for our first horse over 30 years ago and I am still his apprentice :D
 
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My daughter began to pay livery for her horse when she left college and got a full time job. She also pays for her feed, tack, competition stuff. I pay for her insurance and farriery.

I also pay the pony's livery (but this is dirt cheap) and his shoes and insurance.
 
Im 18 with four horses and i pay for all my horse bills!! I rent 6 acres and 4 stables with a yard! My mum and dad pay my car insurance for me, i have offered not to have my car (Which i bought myself) but they figured in the costs of running me about (were in the middle of nowehere) it would be cheaper to pay my insurance, but im hoping in april once i been driving a year that i will start paying it, becoz im hoping it will go down in cost a little! I also live at home for free, but i try do my bit, by keeping ontop of cleaning and stuff! my mum and dad work full time! Only time i struggled last year was paying for all my haylage at once! £700 i managed £500 and my gran gave me £200! Ive started early this year and have started putting £20 a week away now ready!! I do find it hard, Expecially as i would rather not work and spend all my days in the fields with the horses but withought working i wouldnt be in the fields at all! I obviously have hard times like the next person, and i sometime think it would be an easier life withought horses, but then i go up and they give me a cuddle and i feel ever so guilty tha i had even that thort!!
 
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