Relaxing while riding- HELP!

Fruitcake

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I'm having a bit of a nightmare with my riding at the minute and just seem to be going backwards! My instructor says I've really stiffened up and am confusing my horse as I'm too tense when I ask for everything and I'm trying too hard.

I'm even struggling with getting halt! I'm trying so hard not to try hard if that makes sense but obviously it's just counter productive.

Any tips on ways to relax your body or get that halt feeling would be really appreciated. I obviously used to do these things without thinking and so now that I've hit a sticky patch, I can't make myself do it! I'm just so frustrated!
 
To relax my bottom an instructor once told me to imagine an egg being broken and spreading out over the saddle!!

Remember to breathe.

How often do you ride?
 
Sing! Even if like me your voice is shocking it'll make you breathe properly which will help you relax and be calm, which your horse will feel. 99 bottles of beer is a good one to get you started! :) Honestly it does work and who cares how many people give you funny looks either!
 
totally agree sing! my friend used to suffer terribly with nerves and "i will survive" used to be her favourite :)
 
Singing helps

Taking a big deep breath in and then when you're breathing out give everything a good wiggle ie your head/arms/legs/feet.

Practice taking big deep breaths in and out. I've found doing step has helped with this as we do breathing exercises on the cool down bit.
 
Try shrugging your shoulders and rotating them while you walk. What I find tends to happen is my shoulders lock and cause tension, shrugging them forces you to unlock them.
 
Definitely sing or recite poems or even stuff like Cheese and Onion, salt and vinegar, Plain etc anything to switch yourself off really. When you first get on play dead, ie, just sit like a sack of spuds and bimble about singing and nattering to anyone who will listen until you are chilled out, then slowly start to do small exercises. Works for me with my youngster.
 
Thanks so much for all the suggestions! I agree that the singing helps: I do try to do this but tend to stop when I'm concentrating! (I know- totally defeats the object!) Going to try the breaking egg analogy though.

Hoggedmane, I ride most days. I'm really not sure why I seem to have gone backwards. I think I'm just fixating on this and because of it, it's becoming harder. It's really strange that something I've done for years without even thinking about has become such an issue! I hate being useless!!

Sprig- you are so right! I need to stop overthinking it!!
 
You could try the game' I packed my bag'; choose a theme eg fruit and for example.. I packed my bag and in it... I put an Apple... then Apple, Banana,... Apple, Banana, Cranberry... D etc. You have to concentrate quite hard to remember them all and it helps to take your mind off the problem. Do it out loud too and the horse relaxes.
 
I have a "riding playlist" on my phone which I play out loud when hacking out. I do get some odd looks when people are trying to work out where on Idiotpony I've hidden a radio.
 
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