Senior horse no longer lying down

[rabatsa]

I have called time on a large older horse that went the same way. He was Mr R's hack, also on one that would not lie down to sleep who was only mid teens.

Trust your husband, it is his horse.

 

[Hollylee1989]

I guess that was a dig at me. I was annoyed on the OP's behalf, rather than trying to cause a scene, and I snapped at someone I have been actively avoiding for some time. If you want to tell me off, please PM me, so as not to derail the thread again. Thanks

That's all very well, in that case then private message who you've been avoiding instead of calling them out. I'm now defusing this as it isn't fair on mrfoxtrot.

 

[Pearlsacarolsinger]

I'm another who thinks that your husband is right. The horse is his, presumably he knows the horse best and, because it is never an easy dec ision he needs your support. Who cares what anyone else thinks?
I agree with better a week too soon than a day too late but it doesn't sound as if it is a week too soon for this poor old lad. 23 isn't a bad age for a big, heavy, horse.

 

[southerncomfort]

Thank you for all your replies. I don’t know how to quote multi posts but thank you also to those who have shared their experiences however heartbreaking. I do know it’s right, what’s been hard is one half of us (husband) being so sure and then the other (me) being swayed by the whole ‘last summer’ comment and then it causing upset. The thing is however much I love the horse I don’t have the bond he and my husband have. He said he would know when it was time to retire him and he would know when it was time to say goodbye. They went for a little hack last year, he came home, hung up his tack and said that’s the last time I’ll do that. I said how did he know (he’d been lightly hacking him to keep him moving) and he said ‘the turbos gone. I’m used to my big, powerful horse and he’s not there now, he’s trying so so hard not to stumble with me. He’s only going forward because I’m asking him too and he’s to good a boy to say no’

however writing it all down has really helped and helped me see what is right in front of me. He’s the most gorgeous horse, so kind and gentle, and he has had the most lovely lovely life.

I haven't read all the replies, but I just wanted to say how wonderful your husband is.

It sounds like he adores his old horse and always puts the horse's welfare first. This will be utterly heartbreaking for you both and I'm so sorry you are coming this sad decision but it really is the last kindness we can do for our old friends.

Regarding injections, athramid etc... my own personal opinion is that they have their place. But not for an old, sore horse, just to keep him paddock sound.

Thinking of you and your lovely husband.

 

[HollyWoozle]

You and your husband sound like the loveliest, kindest and most caring owners. It really breaks my heart to read your posts but I agree with the notion that the idea of a final summer is for our sake and not theirs.

I had to choose the day for a lovely mare we owned, Inca, who had an arthritic knee from a showjumping home before we had her. I only ever used her for light hacking, then retired her on bute, but it became apparent that one day she might not be able to get up. That was something like 12 years ago and I still think about it sometimes, but I never regret my decision. On the day I looked at her in the field and her sparkle was gone too… I fed her a lovely maple oat bar as a treat and she fell asleep at home as she deserved.

I wish more owners were like you but I am just sorry you have to bear this sadness of loving and losing a dear friend. A big hug to you and your husband.

 

[ponynutz]

Read through all the replies and have nothing more to add than to take care of yourself and each other in the upcoming days and weeks. Sending hugs x

 

[Puzzled]

Only you can make the decision and judge his quality of life and how happy he seems. The lying down wouldn’t worry me. I’ve had a number of older horses….some nearly 40 years of age when pts. They didn’t lie down…maybe a quick roll and straight back up. It was as if they knew that if they lay down too long they’d struggle to get back up.
I think it’s more to do with how they seem in themselves. Are they bright and happy, looking for food etc. Probably most important of all (and only something you can decide) is do they still have a ‘sparkle’ in their eyes?

 

[Equi]

I feel for both you and your husband. I understand the “last summer” comment but think about it logically. The horse has a grey area cushings, fresh spring grass might push that over into laminitis which basically rules out a happy summer in the sunshine. Also, when the grounds harder it will make that landing on his shoulder that much more painful. I’d let your hubby take the lead here and support him through his decision.

 

[nagblagger]

Just sending support, as reading these posts i know what you are going to decide together, as a caring, conscientious family for your 'boy'. Respect to your husband for being so astute to notice subtle changes and giving him retirement time.
Let him run free over the rainbow bridge and without pain, many of us on here have let ours go and they will be waiting for him to join the herd, he will not be alone.

(sorry TDA to hear your news)

 

[Sandstone1]

He is a big horse and although no really old in the scheme of things it does sound like its time. If you have tried the correct dose of bute for his size and its not keeping him sound and able to lie down. Maybe a good talk to your vet would help. Its a tough decision and one you need to be at peace with. It does not matter what others think.

 

[MiJodsR2BlinkinTite]

Had one on the yard almost exactly as described by OP last summer.

Sadly I feel it is now time to "make the call" and say goodbye.

It isn't ever easy but we all know the saying "better a day too soon than a week too late".

 

[Zoeypxo]

Nothing to add just sending my support and hugs , you sound like great owners x

 

[tristar]

so sorry foxtrot, there is no easy answer, we have to follow our feelings on this on this one, i think the last day should one on which the horse, unable to be mended or showing signs of struggling, goes peacefully, quietly, with dignity.

a day that in time can be looked back on as not the ultimate tragedy of having to take ages trying to get the horse up, or getting the vet out, and all the stress involved, but a day when your last memories are of a calm horse, at home, mouth full of his favourite goodies flies off to the big field in the sky, a day you look back on as part of the journey with your horse.

i saw one of mine gallop across the sky on that day.

our thoughts are with you and your dear horse. x

 

[J&S]

The big old super star of a horse who i was lucky enough to ride for nearly 5 years, was retired about 18 months ago. Plan was for him to have this one last summer (aged 29/30) and then say good bye. However, his own system had other ideas and I received a phone call only
a week or so ago to say he had been PTS. He was with his family to the last minute and i am sure he felt the love. Your horse will be the same, loved to the last and remembered forever.

 

[FireCracker238]

Another poster posted this last year, I can't for the life of me remember who it was and I've somehow managed to crop the name off, but it really helped me rationalise and make peace with my decision

 

[Annagain]

Your post has struck a chord with me, OP so I just want to send a hug of solidarity. I know it's not easy when it's not entirely black and white.

My old boy is 29ish. He's still lying down in his stable, loving his rolling, getting up easily (I spent a few minutes watching him this morning and was pleased with what I saw) and seems to be happy in the field but for the first time this winter, he's looked old and has lost a bit of weight. He's had a few issues which could have exacerbated this (he lost his best mate, had a fractured tooth and an abscess that made him quite depressed and off his food for a few days until it erupted) so it's possible he could well be ok next winter but we've also just been told our YOs are selling up. It's not officially on the market yet and I expect it would take a while to sell but it's going to be hanging over us and I might need to be in a position to move if/when a space at the few decent yards in our area comes up. I can't bear the thought of moving him from the only home he's known for the last 20 years (not to mention it will be far more difficult to find room for 2 if we have to move). I think I'll see how he picks up this summer and what condition he's in come the winter or if/when we have to move, whichever is the sooner, and make a decision then.

I do think sometimes PTS is as much an option to prevent suffering as it is because of suffering, as hard as that is to make that decision.

 

[Merrymoles]

Thank you for all your replies. I don’t know how to quote multi posts but thank you also to those who have shared their experiences however heartbreaking. I do know it’s right, what’s been hard is one half of us (husband) being so sure and then the other (me) being swayed by the whole ‘last summer’ comment and then it causing upset. The thing is however much I love the horse I don’t have the bond he and my husband have. He said he would know when it was time to retire him and he would know when it was time to say goodbye. They went for a little hack last year, he came home, hung up his tack and said that’s the last time I’ll do that. I said how did he know (he’d been lightly hacking him to keep him moving) and he said ‘the turbos gone. I’m used to my big, powerful horse and he’s not there now, he’s trying so so hard not to stumble with me. He’s only going forward because I’m asking him too and he’s to good a boy to say no’

however writing it all down has really helped and helped me see what is right in front of me. He’s the most gorgeous horse, so kind and gentle, and he has had the most lovely lovely life.

This post has made me well up because it is clear that your husband truly loves him, has recognised that he is now struggling and that is why he is sure it is time. Cherish the big horse while he is still with you but cherish your husband even more for being caring and brave enough to listen to his horse and recognise what the situation is. Sending you both my admiration and support.

 

[suestowford]

Yes to spoiling this good old boy during his last days. Mine had as much as he wanted of his favourites, all unadulterated with disgusting medicines. He had so many cuddles and a proper goodbye.
I have recently lost another pony in very different circumstances. It was an emergency and it wasn't quiet & peaceful. I know which I would prefer. Always better to have the chance of saying goodbye with love.

 

[Annagain]

Yes to spoiling this good old boy during his last days. Mine had as much as he wanted of his favourites, all unadulterated with disgusting medicines. He had so many cuddles and a proper goodbye.
I have recently lost another pony in very different circumstances. It was an emergency and it wasn't quiet & peaceful. I know which I would prefer. Always better to have the chance of saying goodbye with love.

This is a good point. It's so much better for you (as well as your horse) for them to have a peaceful, non-traumatic end. Having recently lost my 18 year old dog who was just too tired to carry on and who went at home, asleep on her favourite bed knowing nothing about it other than the vet giving her some lovely chicken when she arrived was exceptionally sad but so much easier to deal with than losing my previous dog (an accident) and my old horse (colic) in emergency circumstances.

 

[Flowerofthefen]

Your post has struck a chord with me, OP so I just want to send a hug of solidarity. I know it's not easy when it's not entirely black and white.

My old boy is 29ish. He's still lying down in his stable, loving his rolling, getting up easily (I spent a few minutes watching him this morning and was pleased with what I saw) and seems to be happy in the field but for the first time this winter, he's looked old and has lost a bit of weight. He's had a few issues which could have exacerbated this (he lost his best mate, had a fractured tooth and an abscess that made him quite depressed and off his food for a few days until it erupted) so it's possible he could well be ok next winter but we've also just been told our YOs are selling up. It's not officially on the market yet and I expect it would take a while to sell but it's going to be hanging over us and I might need to be in a position to move if/when a space at the few decent yards in our area comes up. I can't bear the thought of moving him from the only home he's known for the last 20 years (not to mention it will be far more difficult to find room for 2 if we have to move). I think I'll see how he picks up this summer and what condition he's in come the winter or if/when we have to move, whichever is the sooner, and make a decision then.

I do think sometimes PTS is as much an option to prevent suffering as it is because of suffering, as hard as that is to make that decision.

Sorry to hear you may have a decision to make. My retired 27 yo was at his previous yard for 12 years. I moved him 5 years ago. He was so depressed for the first few months. I would say , 5 years down the line, he still isn't fully happy. I won't move him again, especially at his age. He is looking old at the moment and stiff in the morning though still manages a good play in the field. Hopefully he will tell me when the time is right.

 

[Annagain]

Sorry to hear you may have a decision to make. My retired 27 yo was at his previous yard for 12 years. I moved him 5 years ago. He was so depressed for the first few months. I would say , 5 years down the line, he still isn't fully happy. I won't move him again, especially at his age. He is looking old at the moment and stiff in the morning though still manages a good play in the field. Hopefully he will tell me when the time is right.

Hopefully, if/when we have to move, in an ideal world a few of us will find somewhere we can all go together so he'll still have his friends. That's the only way I think I'd consider moving him.

 

[Flowerofthefen]

Hopefully, if/when we have to move, in an ideal world a few of us will find somewhere we can all go together so he'll still have his friends. That's the only way I think I'd consider moving him.

My boy was on his own at the previous yard for a few months due to everyone leaving. He moved to a yard with company and wasn't at all interested in having company. He actually stood for 3 days, facing the direction of his old yard, with his head in the hedge. Bizarre. He had a pony companion in the field. I'm sure it will be totally different for yours as his friend's are moving too.

 

[Melandmary]

As others have said I think your husband is right, for me it is always quality of life over length. Your post struck a chord with me as I am contemplating the same for an elderly mare I have on loan and she has struggled the last 2 winters really. Aside from the weight loss and grumpiness although she does roll she really struggles to get up and I have never seen her lie down to sleep despite a huge deep bed that covers the entire length of a 24ft barn. I have just had the vet out to see if daily bute will help her but deep down I know it is time for her. She has lost the sparkle in her eye. I am waiting for a chat with her owner and plan to give her a month or 2 on the spring grass unless the bute doesn’t help and then let her go before the heat and the flies. You have the last decision to make based on the love you have for your lovely horse , so sad that it is always the toughest. .

 

[SnowandSunshine]

This was the reason that I started thinking it was time for my mare. She was rolling less and hardly lying ever lay down. If you watched her in the stable she'd be constantly shifting her weight on her back legs when all her life before that she stood square.
She was also ID, 28yrs and on bute but looked amazing and seemed perfectly happy. I couldn't bear the thought of her going down and not being able to get up again. I could've waited but I knew she would only get worse.

I honestly don't understand 'one last summer'. The flies, heat and hard ground can make it miserable for them. Your husband is right, it will be awful for you all to say goodbye but you'll able to control the circumstances and make it as peaceful for the horse as possible rather than do it in an emergency situation.

 

[Fransurrey]

So sorry to read that you're facing this. There was a horse at my old yard that struggled to get up and we repeatedly tried to gently suggest it was time, particularly as the horse had to be helped up numerous times. I left the yard, but I'm told that the inevitable did happen and the horse was incredibly distressed, not being able to get up. Had to be pts in the field where he lay. It sounds like you and your husband both know it's time to spoil him rotten and let him go. Hugs.

 

[Janique]

Hello, here in Switzerland, we have a place that care for older horses, some of them are over 30 years old.

When i went to visit, i saw a machine to help them get up in the morning, the staff help the ones strugling to stand up
with the machine.

I personally think that's a step too far, i woulnd't keep a horse that can't stand up or lie down anymore.

Hope it all goes well with your old boy. Courage.