Shocked and disgusted!

[ellie_e]

Sorry but i just wanted to say how rude and nasty some people are on this forum! The attitudes of certain people are awful! I thought this was supposed to be about helping each other and sharing a common interest and love.. HORSES!! Not about making rude comments to others. Not everyone is an experienced rider who has had horses all there lives, theres new riders, and children on this forum, looking for advice and encouragement, not snide, rude, nasty comments!!! We dont all have the same beliefs and ideas, we all do things differently but isnt that the idea...we share advice! Please can you all think before you type, and isnt there a saying ' if you haven’t got anything nice to say...DONT BOTHER!!!'

 

[Ranyhyn]

These forums are a slice of the real world. Not everyone in the real world sugar coats and coos all the time. We have a lot of no-nonsense, clever horse people here who shoot from the hip and don't take tripe - and that's the way we like it.

There are forums which cater more to your needs and likes, might be an idea to find one that suits you better?

Hope that helps.

 

[Mrs B]

With Kitty ^^^^^^^.

It's pretty much like every livery yard there's ever been - only with several thousand members who are not all going to get on with each other.

 

[lexiedhb]

These forums are a slice of the real world. Not everyone in the real world sugar coats and coos all the time. We have a lot of no-nonsense, clever horse people here who shoot from the hip and don't take tripe - and that's the way we like it.

There are forums which cater more to your needs and likes, might be an idea to find one that suits you better?

Hope that helps.

B I N G O


She speaks sense that Kitty!

 

[MerrySherryRider]

' if you haven’t got anything nice to say...DONT BOTHER!!!'

That was one of my mum's favourite pieces of wisdom. Not sure I always listened though.

I do agree with you. Its finding a balance between being straight talking and giving advice and jumping on the bandwagon of self righteous finger waggling.

Its easier to criticise than offer constructive advice and far from being a warning to others, all it does, is put people off from asking advice in case they too are slated.

 

[ellie_e]

Its remarks like that, that make new riders think why do i bother! I'm all for saying it how it is, but do not like it when people are rude to others for no reason. There's no need to be taking the p**s out of people when they are only asking a question. It seems a small few, spoil it for the magority...but this is generally the case in many things. So what makes you a clever horse person then?!? Ive had horses since i could walk, but we all have downsides...hence why people ask for advice!!!

 

[joosie]

These forums are a slice of the real world. Not everyone in the real world sugar coats and coos all the time. We have a lot of no-nonsense, clever horse people here who shoot from the hip and don't take tripe

This is very true But I don't think the OP is talking about people who just "tell it how it is", so much as people who can't phrase their opinions without being insulting and making personal attacks. IMO there is a massive difference between "not sugar-coating and cooing" and being deliberately nasty. You can be no-nonsense without being a bitch!

 

[Lady La La]

B I N G O


She speaks sense that Kitty!

Doesn't she just

 

[ellie_e]

Exactly Joosie!! Well said!!
Notice how its all the 'old nags' who pipe up so quickly!! Maybe their name speaks volumes about them personally?! who knows!

 

[lexiedhb]

You do also have to understand that folk on here have a habit of reinventing themselves with threads like "I gotted a ponio, can I feed it woodchips"- trolls.

Some are clever though, and people can give genuine advice, for it o either be thrown back in their faces or it turns out that the whole thing was a wind up- folk do not like to be taken for fools.

 

[Flicker]

These forums are a slice of the real world. Not everyone in the real world sugar coats and coos all the time. We have a lot of no-nonsense, clever horse people here who shoot from the hip and don't take tripe - and that's the way we like it.

There are forums which cater more to your needs and likes, might be an idea to find one that suits you better?

Hope that helps.

While this is true to a degree, there is also a difference between 'calling it straight' and being downright rude. You don't have to sugar coat something to be polite and helpful. I kind of get what the OP is saying sometimes, because on occasion I've been reading through threads and come across something that has made me blanche (sometimes directed at me, sometimes at another person). There have been some pretty nasty things said on this forum in the past, let's be honest.

And I know that there's the whole 'oh but we've told them once and they don't listen, so that's when we are horrid to them' argument, but surely it is easier to just ignore someone if they are irritating you than to have a go at them?

I don't know - I just think that there is a lot of misery in the world that we can't do anything about. Why add to it? We all have the choice whether to be positive and encouraging or hurtful. As OP says, we all share the same love of horses (and let's face it, that is a painful and expensive love!). Let's not continue this myth that the horse world is populated by a bunch of stuck up biatch'es, because most of the people I know in it are really lovely.

 

[Ranyhyn]

No it isn't. It's remarks like that which make people go to appropriate forums where the members are more like minded. You just wont find what you are looking for here - that's all I'm saying. You can take it or leave it, I couldn't care less personally.

This place is briliant just the way it is in my opinion. You get straight talking no-nonsense but the very same people when you need it can be the most invaluable people in the world.

 

[Ranyhyn]

Notice how its all the 'old nags' who pipe up so quickly!! Maybe their name speaks volumes about them personally?! who knows!

How eloquent - I tried to answer your question fairly and honestly and you return with a back handed comment like that. I think that makes you no better than the people you are ridiculing. And renders your opening post hypocritical and quite ridiculous.

The horseworld is a small one Ellie E from South Wales, catch you on the circuit

 

[andraste]

Exactly Joosie!! Well said!!
Notice how its all the 'old nags' who pipe up so quickly!! Maybe their name speaks volumes about them personally?! who knows!

Absolutely. People should never stoop to rudeness and personal digs. Oh, hang on....

 

[pintoarabian]

There is a vast difference between people who stand no nonsense and pass on the benefit of their experience to those who are rude and offensive and who resort to playground bully gang tactics. You don't have to look far to find evidence of both on here. It may be reflective of real life but that doesn't make it right or acceptable. Behaving like a pit bull with pms isn't a good look.

 

[ellie_e]

Sorry but i dont see how one comment ive just seen calling people fat, and they would never let someone that size (15stone) ride their horse!...and many more comments like that! what the hell is that about?!? that isnt being helpful, that is simply being rude!!!

 

[Kokopelli]

I'm finding it quite hard to understand what your finding so disgusting?

The majority of recent threads on here have been jokey. There have been a few that have gone into a debate but none have escalated further than that. IMO I like the fact so many debates happen on here its interesting hearing peoples differing views and you learn a lot.

 

[lexiedhb]

Sorry but i dont see how one comment ive just seen calling people fat, and they would never let someone that size (15stone) ride their horse!...and many more comments like that! what the hell is that about?!? that isnt being helpful, that is simply being rude!!!

Darling- it is becasue it is believed they are a troll.... as in the questions they are posing are not real, but someone bored and having a wind up.

If the post had simply read " Share your own horse share experiences" the responses would have been 100% different!

 

[lea840]

Exactly Joosie!! Well said!!
Notice how its all the 'old nags' who pipe up so quickly!! Maybe their name speaks volumes about them personally?! who knows!

Now I am total confused as to why you even posted your OP in the first place after reading the above... isn't that sort of thing exactly what you were complaining about in the first place????

 

[BBH]

No it isn't. It's remarks like that which make people go to appropriate forums where the members are more like minded. You just wont find what you are looking for here - that's all I'm saying. You can take it or leave it, I couldn't care less personally.

This place is briliant just the way it is in my opinion. You get straight talking no-nonsense but the very same people when you need it can be the most invaluable people in the world.

Yes some people hugely contribute and others don't Not all of us appreciate or want nasty, aggressive and unnecessary comments if we read threads or post something. I totally agree with the concept of saying things people don't always want to hear but there are ways of saying it without resorting to personal attack.

 

[miss_bird]

I have found the forum to be a mine of information and have met and made some wonderful friends due to this forum.
I have to say if i ask a question i want honest answers not some soft coated waffle, straight to the point and tell me if i am doing wrong that is how we all learn.
Yes sometimes people are rude but that is a fact of life that you have to deal with, and when you get people asking the same darn question over and over and taking no notice of the advice it does start to wear a bit thin and people become more blunt.
If you find some posts a bit offensive dont read them, but there is no need to start another post about it try the search option at the top and you will see this topic has been covered numerous times before

 

[Chopandchips]

HHO reminds me of a busy, local country pub lots of very knowledgeble people (and a couple of weird miserable spiteful fecks!)

I like to call in for a pint and people watch, I also like to pick the brains of said knowledgable people (and pull faces at the spiteful fecks behind their backs ) ..... I would never ask if my 'Bum looks big - as I may not hear what I want

.... If I fancy a chat and am feeling a bit unsure of my stance on something I'll pop into the coffee shop round the corner, order a latte and jump into the conversation (again avoiding the occasional weird spiteful feck who strangely appears to be everywhere!!)

I wouldn't try and change the country pub, or the coffee shop, I'd just go to the one where I fitted in best!

xx

 

[Ranyhyn]

Yes but the point is - this forum is un-moderated. If you want a forum like that, just go elsewhere - why change what most people are happy with? There are loads of horse forums, with moderation, which you will only get nice responses on - I can't understand why people are here, on an un-modded forum, complaining - when they could just go elsewhere? Seems a waste of time and if they do succeed in changing the dynamics of this forum you will lose a hell of a lot of great people just because they don't operate in the way which a minority find unnacceptable.

Or is it, as most of us see it - the fact that this place is hugely useful and far far better than its fluffier alternatives, rude posts INCLUDED??

I think so, that's why I'm still here.

ETS: Mrs O we share the same opinion. And to add - if you cannot handle a bit of rudeness you are in the wrong hobby!!

 

[ellie_e]

Why should people have to go to a different forum because of a minority that cant give helpful criticism? Structured helpful, advice / criticism is what we want, but you don’t have to be rude about it!

 

[AndySpooner]

My first thought was do they mean me.

I have always enjoyed this forum, despite being in the minority most of the time.

It makes you see other points of view, justify your argument and sometimes change your mind.

Someone may always help out with a problem and occasionally you could help someone yourself.


Overall I think this forum is great, but that's down to the members.

 

[bensababy]

Exactly Joosie!! Well said!!
Notice how its all the 'old nags' who pipe up so quickly!! Maybe their name speaks volumes about them personally?! who knows!

You know i kind of agreed with you here until you contradicted yourself.. practise what you preach maybe?

 

[piggyinablanket]

Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm HHO, a few really nice people who actually know what they are talking about, a few genuine novices, and the rest of the forum is full of bulls**ters, copycat quoters, wanabees and beeatches. It entertains me for hours LMAO
I made a similar post when I first came here OP, and was similarly shot down, and told to 'do one'. I was new, and obviously I live in a different world to people who think that some of the behaviour is normal hahaha People just dont talk to each other in person in quite the same way. I am a member of LOTS of forums, but HHO is certainly different.
However, I hope you stick around and learn to ignore the vast volumes of complete childish twaddle on here theres good stuff too you just have to filter it out
Im still here...filtering....laughing....its the whole horse 'world' not just HHO

 

[Ranyhyn]

Because you wont change this one and if you by some chance do - you'll ruin it. So the sensible idea is to just go somewhere else...

Or of course you could just waste your breath here complaining and insulting people and making damn sure when people see your posts in future they remember how you conducted yourself

 

[Booboos]

Exactly Joosie!! Well said!!
Notice how its all the 'old nags' who pipe up so quickly!! Maybe their name speaks volumes about them personally?! who knows!

I take it you have decided that if you can't beat the rude people you'd better join them?

 

[madlady]

I go on more than 1 forum and wouldn't say that any one is better than another. They are different yes and I get different things from each one.

I do agree that there are a lot of knowledgeable people on HHO - there are also a few nasties who never seem to have a good word to say to, or about, anyone - those I either laugh at or ignore.