Sick cat - stopping investigations

[SEL]

I'm really upset by this and just need to check in and confirm I'm not being totally unreasonable

My 14yo cat (ish - she was a stray) has been losing weight. Thyroid meds stabilised it for a bit, but she's dropped more - under her long hair she's skin & bones - & bloods for everything else are fine. She's not walking quite right and generally doesn't look happy

Even the vet thinks it's probably cancer, but she does have problems with her teeth (had cat flu as a baby which has left her with gum issues) but I just don't think it's that because she's eating just losing weight.

I asked for some pain relief yesterday and the vet has given it to me in case it's her teeth causing the problem, but for me it's just to keep her comfortable while I see if I can get a vet to home to PTS

Her vet wants her in for ultrasound etc to diagnose the problem, but I can't see the point in stressing what is obviously a very poorly cat. She absolutely detests the vet and even if the ultrasound doesn't find anything then she's still very ill. It's not the money - I just don't see the point in putting her through more investigations.

How do I explain to the vet - who is only trying to do her job - that this is the end?

 

[Mahoganybay]

Stand firm, kind but firm! You know your own cat and what you will allow her to go through.

I had a similar experience with my 18 year old cat, stopped eating and was looking for places to ‘go’. I rang the vets for an appointment to have her pts. We arrived and the vet tried to talk me into having numerous tests, I asked that they just check her teeth to see if that was the issue (it wasn’t) and I very gently insisted they carried out the reason for our appointment which they did.

Sending hugs

 

[Tiddlypom]

It’s rubbish, you are doing the best for your old cat, but too many modern vets seem to be hardwired to keep on doing more and more tests and more and more procedures even on elderly and terminally ill patients.

In former times vets were more pragmatic when dealing with elderly animals.

Just stand firm, you don’t need to ‘explain’ anything. Just say “It’s time for this cat, I know her, I want her to go peacefully now.

 

[HappyHollyDays]

You know what’s best for her and as hard as it is and as persuasive as vets can be if PTS is what you want for her then that’s what should happen. Sending hugs, you are obviously a wonderful owner with her best interests at heart xx

 

[Redders]

The vet won’t mind, they are only offering you the investigations, it is your decision entirely. Just let them know that you would rather save her stress to diagnose something you likely wouldn’t treat, (or may not be possible to treat) and would prefer to treat her palliatively. I am so sorry your cat is poorly.

 

[ycbm]

I'm really upset by this and just need to check in and confirm I'm not being totally unreasonable

My 14yo cat (ish - she was a stray) has been losing weight. Thyroid meds stabilised it for a bit, but she's dropped more - under her long hair she's skin & bones - & bloods for everything else are fine. She's not walking quite right and generally doesn't look happy

Even the vet thinks it's probably cancer, but she does have problems with her teeth (had cat flu as a baby which has left her with gum issues) but I just don't think it's that because she's eating just losing weight.

I asked for some pain relief yesterday and the vet has given it to me in case it's her teeth causing the problem, but for me it's just to keep her comfortable while I see if I can get a vet to home to PTS

Her vet wants her in for ultrasound etc to diagnose the problem, but I can't see the point in stressing what is obviously a very poorly cat. She absolutely detests the vet and even if the ultrasound doesn't find anything then she's still very ill. It's not the money - I just don't see the point in putting her through more investigations.

How do I explain to the vet - who is only trying to do her job - that this is the end?

Can you write it all in an email? Then they can consider it without pressure and do the right thing for you. I did this to explain why I didn't want more investigations or treatments for an extremely unhappy cat who had kidney failure. The vet was totally on board and gave me an end of day appointment the same day.
.

 

[ycbm]

The vet won’t mind, they are only offering you the investigations, it is your decision entirely. Just let them know that you would rather save her stress to diagnose something you likely wouldn’t treat, (or may not be possible to treat) and would prefer to treat her palliatively. I am so sorry your cat is poorly.

I'm really sorry to disagree but this isn't true of all vets. Two years back I posted a thread about a vet who had refused to PTS two very elderly cats who were toileting all over the house, for a friend of mine. Some vets can also make their disapproval very clear without actually saying so. I do understand, I wouldn't want my job to include having to end animals lives.
.

 

[webble]

Oh so sorry to read this, I hate it when vets think they need to fix at all costs. Just be firm or ask for a different vet. You are 100% making the right decision and cat is lucky to have you to make it big hugs

 

[SEL]

I'm really sorry to disagree but this isn't true of all vets. Two years back I posted a thread about a vet who had refused to PTS two very elderly cats who were toileting all over the house, for a friend of mine. Some vets can also make their disapproval very clear without actually saying so. I do understand, I wouldn't want my job to include having to end animals lives.
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She (the vet) really doesn't want to put to sleep. Even when she phoned through with blood results last night and I said the fact that they were normal obviously meant whatever isn't treatable she just kept pushing ultrasound or having all the teeth removed under GA.

Thanks for the sanity check everyone. I'm going to see if one of the other local practices can do me a home visit, especially if the pain relief doesn't make a difference. I'm just not up for the argument when my heart knows we're at the end of the line.

It's come on top of a similar argument about one of the horses with a young equine vet. Trying to explain that quality of life is more important than quantity just isn't a popular message these days.

 

[AmyMay]

The vet won’t mind, they are only offering you the investigations, it is your decision entirely. Just let them know that you would rather save her stress to diagnose something you likely wouldn’t treat, (or may not be possible to treat) and would prefer to treat her palliatively. I am so sorry your cat is poorly.

This.

 

[Pearlsacarolsinger]

I would ask to speak to a vet that knows me well, explain that the cat has come to the end after a hard life, really stresses if she has to go to the surgery and that I would like her pts at home. Can I make an appointment? Or I would just book an at home pts with the receptionist.
I do think it helps when you've known the vet for a while. A vet I've known since we were both young was booked to visit my elderly horse, when she deteriorated. I rang him that morning, explained that I was going to ring the Equine Crem, so would cancel his visit. He said, " You have enough experience to know what's best". I think the trouble arises when the vet doesn't really know you.

Unfortunately (for me) that vet has retired now.

 

[SEL]

I would ask to speak to a vet that knows me well, explain that the cat has come to the end after a hard life, really stresses if she has to go to the surgery and that I would like her pts at home. Can I make an appointment? Or I would just book an at home pts with the receptionist.
I do think it helps when you've known the vet for a while. A vet I've known since we were both young was booked to visit my elderly horse, when she deteriorated. I rang him that morning, explained that I was going to ring the Equine Crem, so would cancel his visit. He said, " You have enough experience to know what's best". I think the trouble arises when the vet doesn't really know you.

Unfortunately (for me) that vet has retired now.

Sadly that practice seems to have a high flow of small animal vets - I haven't seen the same one twice for years now.

I know people are saying she's only offering the investigations but it was a lot more insistent than that. I clearly said at the appointment yesterday that unless bloods showed thyroid / kidney issues then I wouldn't put her through anything else. She was practically pleading with me to do the ultrasound, but if it's cancer then we get to the same result and if there's nothing obvious I still have a very poorly cat = same outcome. I wouldn't put her through surgery if there's a mass either.

 

[slimjim86]

Maybe bypass your vets all together and contact one of the vet practices that do home visits just for pts. Then email your vets after and say that the cat is no longer with you and you want to close your account.

 

[alibali]

I'm sorry that this vet is making you feel pressured to carry out investigations which are so clearly not in your cats best interests.

From having friends in the field I know they are duty bound to offer what is considered the 'gold standard' treatment. Unfortunately some less experienced vets seem to have misconstrued this to mean they ought to be encouraging the 'gold standard' when frequently just because you can do something doesn't mean they should. Also some clients misconstrue being offered the 'gold standard' as an implication the vet thinks that's what they ought to do rather than just something they have to offer. Sometimes my friend finds herself treating animals beyond what she feels is their best interests because that's what the owner wants. She is duty bound not only to offer the treatment but to perform it if requested (unless it falls into the category of downright cruelty). It's all about allowing owners to make informed choices I think, unfortunately being informed doesn't always mean people make good choices, though usually with the very best of intentions. Being a vet is a very hard job emotionally I think, they have my respect. Unfortunately some inexperienced vets appear to have a real issue putting animals to sleep, which to me is very strange, they just don't seem to have grasped that a large part of their job is to relieve suffering by doing exactly that. However that is the vets issue not yours.

You have made a very sensible and considered decision that is obviously in your cats best interest. You don't need to explain just call the practice and request a home visit to PTS. If your practice don't offer this service then there are mobile specialist practices that offer exactly that service. I looked into it for my car who was a terrible traveller and very stressed at a surgery. It was expensive but I'd much rather spend my giving my much loved cat a peaceful and dignified release than a stressful ultrasound which would achieve nothing but the vets peace of mind.

 

[meleeka]

I always ask myself if the diagnosis will make any difference to the outcome and how much treatment would be needed. I'm sorry your vet isn't very pragmatic, luckily mine is and agreed with me when I asked to PTS my old dog, despite on paper being fixable. It was the right thing to do for her and I'm glad she had a lovely life and a swift end, with no suffering. OP stick to your guns, it's your cat and you know best.

 

[SEL]

Maybe bypass your vets all together and contact one of the vet practices that do home visits just for pts. Then email your vets after and say that the cat is no longer with you and you want to close your account.

I've just got hold of a telephone number for a practice that do home visits for PTS.

The trouble with throwing 'gold standard' options out is you start to doubt yourself and wonder if that is a route that you should be looking at.

 

[Birker2020]

Stand firm, kind but firm! You know your own cat and what you will allow her to go through.

I had a similar experience with my 18 year old cat, stopped eating and was looking for places to ‘go’. I rang the vets for an appointment to have her pts. We arrived and the vet tried to talk me into having numerous tests, I asked that they just check her teeth to see if that was the issue (it wasn’t) and I very gently insisted they carried out the reason for our appointment which they did.

Sending hugs

Ours had gone downhill suddenly, she'd not eaten for a few days despite trying to coax her with all manner of nice things and in the end had to syringe water down her throat on vets advice. Meantime vets gave us some drugs to try her with as they weren't sure what was wrong, while we waited on the results of a blood test to determine what was wrong. As soon as we got the call to say what it was (acute kidney failure) we took her to be pts which was made by worse by the vet offering us a 'lifeline' in the form of kidney dialysis twice a week. I was so angry, they thought we'd line their pockets to give our precious pooch a few more days/weeks.

 

[SilverLinings]

I've just got hold of a telephone number for a practice that do home visits for PTS.

The trouble with throwing 'gold standard' options out is you start to doubt yourself and wonder if that is a route that you should be looking at.

You know your cat, and it is clear from your posts that she is very unwell, and that there is no evidence that this is something that can be fixed without risks/further suffering to her (and that's only if they are able to find out the cause, and if it turns out to be something that can be treated, with the cat continuing to be very ill in the meantime). It sounds as though you have thought this through thoroughly and clearly and know what is best for your lovely cat. The vet may be offering further investigative options, but that doesn't mean it would be the right choice for this cat. As is often said on here, just because we (or the vet) can do something doesn't mean we (or the vet) should do it.

I am pleased for you that you have found a practice that can carry out PTS at home. I hope that you feel able to make a clear decision, but it sounds like you have already thought very hard about how to end the cat's suffering in the best way for her x

 

[SantaVera]

You know your cat better than any vet.

 

[View]

OP, thank you for putting your beloved cat’s needs first. I am so glad that I’ve never had a vet even try to resist when I’ve made the decision that it’s time.

I’m glad you have found a way to let her go peacefully.

 

[paddy555]

The trouble with throwing 'gold standard' options out is you start to doubt yourself and wonder if that is a route that you should be looking at.

you should be looking at the route that is best for your cat. Not you, not anyone else and certainly not your vet.

I hope you have got it resolved now. I have come across vets who want every test under the sun and are unhappy to PTS. I am afraid it is a case of telling them what is going to happen in the cat's interests. If this was my vet I would explain the decision had been made in the cat's best interests considering all possibilities then I would ask them if they were aware of how much they were upsetting me. It was bad enough having to have my beloved cat PTS and I would have hoped for vet support at this sad time not hassle.

 

[Boulty]

I think there’s a difference between trying to support a cat who is losing weight for an unknown reason but otherwise really happy in themselves with an owner keen to investigate further (ideally with a cat who will be relatively tolerant of said investigations) and a cat who is becoming unhappy in other ways and who is signalling that they’ve had enough.

There might be something treatable / manageable found on ultrasound or there might not but if it’s unlikely to change what you’d want to do and is highly likely to be something that will result in PTS anyway then can totally understand why you don’t think it’s fair to further stress the cat if she’s currently unwell in herself.

If you’ve got any mobile vets near you then you can usually book in directly with them for a visit if that’s what you’d like

 

[SEL]

Now at peace in her favourite spot in the back garden.

Went downhill quickly and told me it was time - no need for any investigations because whatever it was she was ready.

Going to miss her desperately.

 

[SilverLinings]

I'm sorry that her time came @SEL, it is never easy to loose a much loved animal. She looks like a really beautiful cat, and she was lucky to have an owner who put her needs before their own grief when it was time to make the final decision.

 

[Errin Paddywack]

What a gorgeous cat she was. You have all my sympathy.

 

[Ratface]

What a beautiful, characterful cat. You gave her peace at the end.
I'm so sorry for your loss.

 

[FinnishLapphund]

Now at peace in her favourite spot in the back garden.

Went downhill quickly and told me it was time - no need for any investigations because whatever it was she was ready.

Going to miss her desperately.
View attachment 143334

I'm so sorry for your loss.
It must be so hard for you to no longer see her, and her beautiful face, where you're used to seeing it.
{{{{{{Hugs}}}}}}

 

[Kunoichi73]

What a pretty girl. You did the best for her, even though you knew you'd be upset. You're the type of owner every animal should have. Very sorry for your loss.

 

[Snow Falcon]

What a beautiful cat, so sorry you have lost her.

 

[ycbm]

She was so beatific. I'm glad for you that she gave you no choice, Sel. It also goes to show you knew what was best for her. I hope you miss her a little less soon.
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