Soo angry

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xxkatejayxx

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Horse saga again
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I saw an ad for a gelding in my local saddlery shop, he was advertised as for loan or sale so I enquired about him. I arranged to go and see him, then his owner text me 2 days before to say she'd got someone interested in buying him so she wanted to see them first. Then they didn't want him so I went to see him the weekend after, I rode him in the school and got on really well with him. Then his owner asked me if I wanted to come down in the week and take him on a hack so I took a day off work and went on a hack with her and another lady, she also came to look at the yard that day and said she liked it. Then she asked if I'd have a lesson (which I had to pay for) with her instructor (who also broke Hugo in) which was arranged for this Wednesday but had to be cancelled at the last minue (literally half an hour before I was due there) due to him having to stay at work late so it was rearranged for last night. I went and had my lesson, I thought it went really well and I really enjoyed it.

His owner said she would have a chat with her instructor and take it from there but she did seem happy with me etc. She did tell me before that the loan would only be for a year or two and then she would have to sell him but I'd have first refusal which I said was fair enough and that I would be able to buy him then. Have just had a text of her saying: "Hiya, I've had a chat wiv **** an he feels its best that I sell **** now rather than later as I'm worried bout his progress. Plus we think its best jus 2 do it now than av 2 have him bk off u in a yr 2 sell which isn't fair 4 u. Sorry! U r welcome 2 buy him though? Sorry Im jus goin wiv what Im advised 2 do"

Now she knew from the start that I can't afford to buy at the moment but would be able to in a year or so. I've been looking for absolutely ages now but never seem to get anywhere and am getting fed up of looking He seemed really suitable, I felt safe on him (which is good for me as I do lack confidence sometimes) and now I'm just feeling a bit let down

I feel like I've been messed around and have wasted my time as I've turned other people down who have horses that would have been suitable

I haven't replied to her message yet as I'm not to sure what to say
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Ah you must be very disappointed - but sometimes these things do happen.

I'd just text her back and say that you are not in a position to buy at the moment, so will have to say no. But thanks.
 
Sounds to me like you've been used. I wouldn't hesitate in ringing her & telling her what you think. Let her know you feel really angry & that she's wasted so much of your precious time. She has her own mind, she doesn't have to do what her "instructor" says. Is there no way you could buy now? If not I'd be asking her what's more important to her - that the horse gets a good home or financial - if she says it's not financial then I don't understand why you can't buy next year as originally agreed. If she needs the money now, fair enough, what can you do, she's just lied. If she's not desperate for the money what difference does it make if she sells now or in a years time.
 
But Nijinsky, aren't people allowed to change their minds? We have no idea what this persons situation is?

If the loan had gone ahead we would all have been applauding this lady for being so responsible about ensuring that the horse had gone to the right person.
 
I can understand how frustrated and disappointed you must be feeling right now - if she won't agree to an instalment plan as minerva suggests - then you'll just have to put it down to experience and comfort yourself with the thought that it wasn't meant to be and the right horse is out there for you - hard though this is. I personally would be a bit cautious about loaning a horsey off someone so indecisive.
 
So you knew from the outset that it was sell or loan. The instructor sounds as if she has been sensible in her advice really. Youngsters need consistency, and if the loan fell through the owner may not be in a position to consistently work it as it would need - hence selling or loaning in the first place.

I would go for ads that state loan only next time. At least you know where you are then.
 
I totally disagree Nijinsky.

At the end of the day this is HER horse, and yes while Kate will be gutted as she liked him, and it is a shame, the owner did do everything to make sure that she was the right person for him, which I applaud.

It could be financial resons, it could be she is worried about him being ruined and being worth nothing, I mean afterall if she is DEFINITELY going to sell him anyway, why not sell him now?

Perhaps it was the heart stings causing her to consider a loan in the first place.

Also, selling the horse doesnt mean he wont get a good home! I think the owner has already made it clear she is fussy about where he goes!

Katie Im sorry you have mised out, unfortunately this can be the downfall of loaning, Ive had it happen to me a few times, but thats life.

Unless you are going to buy a horse you have to face the fact it can always be taken away from you unfortunately.

I wish you the best of luck finding something, it sounds like you can offer a wonderful home.

I do think she could have at least had the decency to ring you and tell you properly though.
 
Of course people are allowed to change their mind but it just seems she's changed her mind back & forth, back & forth, like she doesn't really know what she wants. If she had said I'd prefer to sell him but if I can't am happy to loan, then the girl would at least be expecting that. But as you say we don't know her circumstances and she may need the money now.
 
She didn't say anything about selling him as she needs the money it was because she wanted to ride when she could instead of having to ride. I'd told her I'd even keep having lessons with her instructor
 
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she's changed her mind back & forth, back & forth

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Has she? I don't see evidence of that.

It was advertised as loan/sell. She went with sell.
 
It's only my personal opinion, I just feel that she's been messed about, (I don't know how you do these "quotes"). When I say back & forth I meant, she asked her to come and hack out, then to have a lesson, Kate waited till the other person went with a view to buying. She was still in loan mode when asking Kate to do these things. Kate's done everything asked of her. Maybe I'm just a big softie, I just feel sorry for her. Of course these things happen, and yes it is her horse & at the end of the day up to her what she does with it and if it all doesn't work out for Kate I hope she finds something else.
 
I think asking her to go and ride it a few times was highly responsible.

I also think I'm a bit of a realist though as well. Nothing in life is certain until it's 'in your hand' so to speak.

The woman definately sounds as if the old heart strings were tugging a bit - and which ever decision she made was going to be hard for her.

Hey ho, that's life.......
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I agree with Amymay...Before we bought my 5 yr old we were planning to have him on loan..I too had to go for a lesson and see how we got on and the owner also said when I first went to see him that they would want to sell him a yr's time.My husband had actually organised to just buy him right away in the end and It went on for months before we finally got him and two weeks before we bought him he was shipped down to their friends yard where he could be schooled and with better facilities for the lesson, Little did I know that they had also offered him to the instructor who wanted him for her lessons and he had gone to her yard for her to use him and see how he got on....it could have turned into a bidding war but in the end we managed to get him......it is good that she has text you and told you her situation straight...better you know now then get the horse on loan and 6 months down the line she wants to sell him.
Ask about installments and if not then maybe worth waiting for another horse....I appreiciate your feeling and know how sad it must be, I do feel for you as I can understand the heartbreak...
 
perhaps she has thought about it and realised there is no point to loaning him for 1 or 2 years and then selling him. She may get less for him as he will be 2 years older plus if you wreck him (not saying you will) and then don't want to buy him yourself then what is she supposed to do?

Or it may be that she only wants to loan him to someone who is going to increase his value for when she sells him, basically free proffessional schooling or it maybe that she isn't keen on the way you ride and is trying to let you down gently.
 
I'm glad I don't buy & sell often it would be a nightmare. Though please keep your fingers crossed for me for Sunday as I'm going to look at a mare (first time buying in 7 years). For various reasons it's taken 3 weeks to get to see her & I'm so excited. Let's hope this will be more straight forward!! I have a nice 6 hour round trip to look forward to. I've never sold a horse though so I imagine it must be heartbreaking.
 
Make sure you ask lots of questions on the phone before going to view - it can save an awful lot of time.

Good luck though for Sunday. It's exciting isn't it? I bought Thumper after having owned Amy for 13 years, so was just as out of practice.........
 
We've been 3 weeks on the phone, I hope I've asked everything there is to ask. I'm gonna be as nervous as hell though & probably ride like pants but hope it will go ok. Buying must be easier than loaning. It's a straight forward if I like I'll buy, if I don't I won't. Unless she decides after she doesn't want to sell - OMG I hope not, or she fails the vetting. Cross that bridge when we come to it. I just wish it wasn't so far away.
 
I was pretty nervous when I tried the two out that I sat on.

I nearly died when I was riding Thumper and they announced that I was now going to pop over some fences. (I'm a major wimp!)
 
Annoying I know but a person loaning will generally always play second fiddle to a person buying as money makes the world go round! No point getting cross with her as it's her horse at the end of the day and she can do as she likes.
The only way to avoid this sort of situation is to put your hand in your pocket and buy one I'm afraid. Hope you get fixed up soon.
 
How disappointing for you. But people do change their minds especially when it comes to horses! I would text her back, saying that you are not in a position to buy at the moment but should she change her mind (again) you would like to have him on loan with a view to buy in the future. There is not point in being rude - the horsey world is small and you never know this lady might know of something else that might be suitable. Chin up!
 
This exact same thing happened to me about 3 years ago. A friend of a friend was going away for a year and wanted someone to take on her 6 year old SJ horse as a loan. I took a day off work, travelled down to Somerset from Chepstow to try him, absolutely loved him but she came back to me about 3 days later saying that she had decided to sell him as it would be less complicated than loaning.

I was dissapointed at the time but I can see her point - if there had been a problem and she was out of the country or if she decided to sell later and I had not improved him she would be in trouble.

Bad luck on it happening to you. I hope you manage to find a nice horse. Have you tried rescue centres? I had a wonderful horse on loan from a rescue centre before I bought my own.
 
I think times have changed and people dont really loan out horses as much nowadays.

I have in the past and regreated it big time.

Can you not look to buying one?
 
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