Such a shock.

PinkFairy

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Hi everyone, it's weird to be posting here again after so long away from the forums but when I got the news about my dog, this was the only place I felt I could talk about it.

Just to give a brief background..

Basically my hubby has had our staffie (one of 3) for nearly 10 years after getting her when she was a puppy. Not long after getting her, he got a second staff pup which was the runt of his sister's litter that she'd got from her two. (Hope that makes sense so far lol). He has had both dogs since pups and the first pup seemed to adopt the second one and as they've grown up together, she's been the matriarch of the group (we got a third dog about 3 years ago) and she's pretty much the central character of them all, she has the biggest personality and is just as mad as a box of frogs lol. She's wonderful with children and is nicknamed the nanny dog by family members because she's just fantastic, so we had always looked forward to the day that we would introduce her to our own child. For various reasons, I have formed very deep emotional attachments to the dogs and I have close bonds with all of them, so to lose one of them feels like I'm losing a part of me.

So that's kind of the background, I have only been with hubby for just under 6 ish years so he's obviously got more of an emotional attachment to her for personal reasons and so when we noticed she wasn't behaving quite herself in that she was losing weight but her belly was still rounded and full, she would hide away and just generally be very quiet which is highly unlike her as she normally loves playing, has oodles and oodles of energy and is always running about and getting under my feet lol, we took her to the vets and they did a blood test and ultrasound. The blood results showed she was anaemic which explained her quietness and being lethargic but nothing else showed so the vet said it was looking more positive. But then came the ultrasound results and I tell you,I was totally shocked. The vet said he found multiple tumours around her liver which he said were most likely to be cancerous but he couldn't say for certain without testing them. He explained that surgery wasn't really an option because there were so many tumours and we could really only medicate her with steroids to slow the progression down or try treatment for the cancer which wouldn't cure her, it would only give us a few more months with her or, as the bloodwork showed her liver was still functioning, she didn't seem to be in pain, we could leave her for a while and then make a decision.
I knew straight away (was alone when I was told) that my hubby wouldn't want to put her through medications and surgeries and so I knew that the only option left would be to put my darling girl to sleep.
The vet said without treatment she would likely only have a matter of weeks to live which absolutely floored me. I cannot believe that she could be totally normal, bounding around etc one day and then the next a totally different dog with a terminal illness and I've been in floods of tears at the situation.

But saying all that, we have made the decision to put her to sleep, we don't want her to suffer and we don't want to wait til it gets worse either. At the moment, her belly is swollen and her breathing has changed to shorter breaths which the vet explained was because of the swollen belly, so I'm trying my utmost to make her last days comfortable but in the back of my mind, I just question whether I'm giving up on her. I feel guilty at the thought of putting her to sleep because I feel like I should do more for her. I am heartbroken that this beautiful girl's life is ending this way and it feels way too soon to say goodbye to her. I know it's the best thing for her but i can't imagine her not being around, terrorising the neighbours cats and getting into mischief with the other two... She is such a big personality that losing her will create a huge void and the thought of driving to the vets with her in the car and then driving home without her breaks my heart to pieces.

I'm sorry for rambling on but this is the hardest thing I have ever had to do, I've never had pets that I was this attached to and losing her so soon is obviously totally unexpected.

I don't know what I'm expecting to gain by posting here, but I guess by chatting with other dog lovers, I was hoping that someone could reassure me that we are doing the right thing because it is breaking my heart. The middle dog that she grew up with will be without her "mother" and I don't know how she will react to the loss. We have a third dog but their relationship is not as close so I don't know what will happen to the remaining two when she's gone.

It seems strange to think that she's so poorly because I see glimpses of her as her old self, mainly when there is food around lol, her eyes go wide and she's all of a sudden on alert because there's food lol and she takes treats and has been eating, drinking (although not as much as usual), going out for the loo etc. I just can't get my head around how unwell she is because she doesn't look it at times but I know that inside, she is very poorly and the decision we have made is for the best.... I just feel devastated by it all. Again, sorry for the majorly long essay. Just needed to get that all off my chest.

:(
 

Bestdogdash

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Just wanted to say that my heart goes out to you and your family. The loss of a dear dear friend is a terrible thing to experience. For what it is worth, you are doing the kindest thing for your girl, in PTS, letting her leave with minimum pain and some dignity as she deserves. I am so sorry for your loss.
 

PinkFairy

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Thank you. I know I don't want her to get worse so we will be taking her to the vets this week. I think the shock of it and how quickly it's happened makes me feel like it's too soon. :(
 

splashgirl45

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so sorry for you and your oh, but you are doing the best for her before she gets too uncomfortable... a friend of mine has a flat coat retreiver who was diagnosed with cancer a few months ago. she had an op to remove the lumps and had chemotherapy and the vet said she should get good quality of life for another couple of years. this was only 3 months ago and the lumps have come back and are growing very quickly.. my friend has decided to let nature take its course and PTS as soon as she is unhappy , the vet thinks maybe only a few months....hope this helps you to feel better about your decision and for what its worth i think you are doing exactly what i would do....
 

FlaxenPony05

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So, so sorry OP :( We had exactly the same situation with our beautiful flat coat a couple of years ago, splenic cancer. It's such a shock as you don't think it'll ever happen to your dog.

We now have a Staff X who is just perfect and I couldn't even start to think about what I'd do if something similar happened - they really are the most loving, joyful dogs. xx
 

MurphysMinder

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I am so sorry you are facing this, but I think you are absolutely doing the right thing for her. It would be easy to keep her going for your own sake but you are putting her first .
Hopefully your middle dog will be okay but I am sure she will miss her as much as you will. I do believe that it helps if the dogs left behind can see their friend after they have gone , they seem to accept the loss more easily this way.
 

PorkChop

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So sorry PinkFairy, what a shock and an awful situation for you all.

Enjoy your time with her, you are absolutely doing the right thing even though you will have doubts x
 

meesha

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just over week ago we had our BC put down after he lost bit of weight then went wobbly, ultrasound showed huge tumour, bit different as he was 13 but I don't regret for one moment the decision to pts. We were lucky in a way that we had little choice as we weren't offered and didn't push for treatment even though 5 days before he had been out on the mendips with the horse. We miss him terribly but he went so peacefully.

Ours was already at the vets when we got the results but you could have the vet pts at home, she will be happy in her own surroundings and if u wanted to u could let the others see that she is gone, I have had cats pts at home and it was v peaceful, they took the cat away after in a little blanket and we let the other cat sniff the one who was pts and although v upsetting she accepted she was gone.

You are not giving up on your girl, better sooner rather than later if u feel she has lost quality of life. You will get over it, its hard but it does get easier with time x
 

Bungo

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Oh Pink Fairy I'm so sorry for you. At the beginning of the month we lost one of our boys to a brain tumour. He got off the sofa staggered and collapsed and we had to PTS within 18 hours. Totally unexpected in an 8 year old mixed breed dog. I send you big hugs. We overcame some of our loss by getting a new rescue boy who has brought us so much joy. I always feel as one wonderful dog leaves us they make space for another one to enter our lives. We always take rescues and although we have lost 3 dogs in the last 5 years to serious medical problems, I wouldn't have missed a second with any of them. She will always be in your heart, no-one can take your memories away.
 

ThreeTB's

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So sorry :( dogs are with us for too short a time. Agree with other posters, let her enjoy her last days being loved by her family, then let her go before she's suffering too much - it's easy to try to hang on to them for 'just another day/week' but better a day too early than too late. Thinking of you x
 

Gingermonkey

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Very sorry to hear your news, you are doing the hardest and the most difficult thing anyone can do for their beloved dog but it is the right thing. The trip to and from the Vets is so hard. I wonder, would your vet come out and send her to her rest in the comfort of her home and bed?
 

Cinnamontoast

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You poor things :( Been through similar and as soon as we had the MRI results, we made the call to the vet to come round, so I think you're doing absolutely the right thing.

The vet nurse had a dog going through the same as ours and she kept him going, paralysed, soiling his bed because he couldn't get up and it made me so angry that she didn't make the decision sooner. Better one day too soon than days or weeks too late.

It may make the remaining two closer, or not. The dynamic might change, only time will tell.
 

Booboos

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I am so very sorry for your bad news. It must be a huge shock this is all happening so quickly but sadly it sounds like your poor doggy is quite unwell. It's a very personal decision, if you think it's the best time to put her to sleep then it's the best time. If you think asking for a second opinion and/or trying the steroids is worth it, then try that but don't beat yourself up about it. You know your dog best, you can assess her welfare so go with what feels right (well, as right as a horrible situation like this can ever feel).
 

LittleMonster

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Im sorry to hear you have had to make this decision sooner then you expected, but i think you are doing the right thing. I would've done the same if it was my baby.

My thought are with you and your partner as well as your kids
 

PinkFairy

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Thank you for all the replies.

She is comfortable at the moment and I'm giving her lots of cuddles, attention and just making sure she is as comfy as possible. I don't know if the vet does house calls, not sure what would feel worse - driving her there and coming home without her or having her at home and seeing her being taken away. I am going to be an emotional wreck either way. :(

Thank you again for the replies everyone.
 

PorkChop

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Enjoy your cuddles x

If you are not planning to bury her at home maybe taking her to the Vets would be better.

I am sure you would be able to find a Vet that will pts at home if that's what you decide - hugs.
 

Selkie

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So sorry for you all. They are never here long enough. You are doing the right thing so cuddle her and spoil her and make her comfy. And treasure all the happy memories of her.
 

PinkFairy

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Thanks all.

We had our darling girl put to sleep on Tuesday after she went downhill very quickly. We chose to stay with her when the vet did it and I'm glad we could be there for her and cuddle her and stroke her face as she fell asleep. It was extremely quick, although I was told it would be, I still wasn't quite prepared for just how quick it was. Watching them carry her away broke our hearts and then walking out of the doors and driving home without her there felt totally wrong, like I'd left a part of me behind and I sobbed all the way home. :( it's the little things she did every day that now she isn't here, I notice them much more and I have a little cry. Our other dog (who grew up with her since they were puppies), has been pining, more so in the evening and during the day she clings to me. She isn't very close to our other dog so I'm not sure how to boost her spirits and help her through the process. I've been giving her lots of cuddles and attention though. I guess we are all going through a grieving process and I just have to give her some time.

Thanks again for the support, I was grateful for the reassurance that we were doing the right thing.
 

meesha

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So so sorry to hear she is gone. We are 3 weeks on from losing ours, it does get a bit easier with each week {although still flipping hard) xx
 
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