Suspiciously missing stuff...

[tatty_v]

My livery and I parted ways earlier in the year, as what had been a good relationship was deteriorating due to her propensity to treat my house and stables as her own, ignore polite requests (like don’t spraypaint the floor of the stable please!) and boss me about to an unbearable level (not allowed to store my fork outside my stable, for example, because it “looks untidy”!) She has since been slagging me off to all and sundry, which I have tried to graciously ignore.

I am sad about all this as we were good friends initially, but after she moved I’ve had so many people tell me they were surprised I stuck it out that long (would have been useful to know before but still!)

I went to clip my horse at the weekend and realised that both sets of my blades were missing. I know she had them last, but she is claiming that they “went missing” when she took them to the sharpeners and only her sets returned.

This seems highly unlikely, but there’s not a lot I can do about it. So I just needed a place to vent and ask, why do people have to be like this?! No matter how a friendship pans out I would never take someone’s things!

Rant over (and I’m still £80 out of pocket!)

 

[Roxylola]

Ugh, my sympathies, people are frequently just vile

 

[Flicker]

She will feel justified because you presumably asked her to leave. It will be your fault in her mind therefore she will feel that she is entitled to ‘compensation’ in some form.

Some people are just incapable of accepting accountability for their behaviour. It seems to be a feature of the modern age.

Sorry this happened to you.

 

[Lots of Gift Bags]

That's really terrible, people are pretty awful sometimes.

 

[ycbm]

Dreadful behaviour. My neighbour's livery took the postcode hoof brands that she part owned with my neighbour, the yard owner. She seemed to forget that I owned a third of them as well and I wasn't even a livery and was entirely blameless!

 

[Pedantic]

Because we live in a NOA

 

[View]

Unfortunately, some people feel very entitled.

Rant away safely here - it’s better to get it off your chest.

 

[luckyoldme]

Eugh dont get me started.
People that walk all over you , treat you like crap then act all shocked when you tell them to do one !

 

[Rumtytum]

A fully justified rant. Disgusting behaviour, you are well rid of her.

 

[babymare]

Rant away! I don't understand how some people are so horrid? The quote" Do unto others as you would have done unto you" speaks volumes

 

[J&S]

I'm sure she will get her come- uppance at some point! Karma, and all that.

 

[Trouper]

Karma - definitely. Sometimes you just have to pity some people's sad lives. When I am not feeling quite so benevolent I just remember that the view from the moral high ground is better!!

 

[JulesRules]

What's up with some people who just feel the need to help themselves to your stuff?

When I left my last yard after a fall out with the owner (she kept leaving my paddock gates open while my horses were out and moving and taking down my fence down) I moved everything apart from my electric fencing and came back a day or so later to do it. When I arrived she was going along the fence cutting the tape and taking my fence posts. She stopped when I arrived and caught her and I was so glad to be out of there that I just left it thinking that if she was so desperate for a few plastic posts she was welcome to them, but then when I had to buy more this summer I must admit it did grate all over again.

 

[CanteringCarrot]

It's like people don't want livery options to exist anymore by behaving this way. They ruin it for the rest of us. If people wonder why they can't ever find a place, well...

 

[Keith_Beef]

Because we live in a NOA

What's a NOA?

I don't understand people like OP's former sharer.

Or people who help themselves to things that have been forgotten on the yard. I regularly bring things into the office, and I even asks before taking something out of the rubbish bin like a broken schooling whip or crop (to recycle the flexible rod) or a stirrup leather whose buckle or stitching is broken.

 

[Widgeon]

I don't know. People are just bizarre. The older I get and the more people I know as an adult, the stranger I think people are! So many people behave in a way that makes no sense whatsoever to me.

 

[tatty_v]

Thank you so much everyone, sharing definitely halves the burden! Also, although it’s not nice to hear that this kind of thing happens all the time, it makes me feel a little bit less like a naive trusting idiot!

 

[dorsetladette]

My livery and I parted ways earlier in the year, as what had been a good relationship was deteriorating due to her propensity to treat my house and stables as her own, ignore polite requests (like don’t spraypaint the floor of the stable please!) and boss me about to an unbearable level (not allowed to store my fork outside my stable, for example, because it “looks untidy”!) She has since been slagging me off to all and sundry, which I have tried to graciously ignore.

I am sad about all this as we were good friends initially, but after she moved I’ve had so many people tell me they were surprised I stuck it out that long (would have been useful to know before but still!)

I went to clip my horse at the weekend and realised that both sets of my blades were missing. I know she had them last, but she is claiming that they “went missing” when she took them to the sharpeners and only her sets returned.

This seems highly unlikely, but there’s not a lot I can do about it. So I just needed a place to vent and ask, why do people have to be like this?! No matter how a friendship pans out I would never take someone’s things!

Rant over (and I’m still £80 out of pocket!)

Would you like to share my gin?

 

[highlandponygirl]

I wouldn't worry about the gossip she spouts, you (and probably everyone else) know you've done nothing wrong. People like your former livery never change, she'll take her awful attitude and sticky fingers wherever she goes; everyone will soon get the measure of her and treat her accordingly.

 

[PapaverFollis]

The one that made me laugh at one yard was the one that spent a great deal of money on padlocks and chains for her feed bins... but she was the one stealing other people's feed!

 

[Annagain]

I feel your pain - my best friend and I use each other's stuff interchangeably - horses are same size and I used to share her horse anyway. We've both noticed little things going missing recently - particularly things we had two or more of or things we haven't used for a while - almost as if someone is thinking "they won't miss those". It's just things like brushes, hay nets (we have hay bars so only need nets for the trailer or when they're tied up for the farrier) and schooling whips -the horses are getting on and have only been hacking for last year or so so we haven't used them. We had 3 in the tack room, all gone. I went to use my lunge whip for the first time in years on Wednesday - now that I have Charlie. Even though I hadn't used it I knew where it was (in a place that wasn't easy to find) and it was there a few months ago and that had gone too.

There are a couple of more expensive things we've noticed too. A breastplate martingale has disappeared - again the old boys haven't worn it for years but I needed a martingale for Charlie and when I went to look for it it wasn't there. The latest thing, two identical rugs that neither old horse had worn for years but were still there in May when I packed the winter rugs away. I was going to try them on Charlie. The strange thing is, they're at least 6" too big for any other horse on the yard and even if they fitted any other horses we'd certainly notice if they were wearing them as they're bright purple.

I've also had a pair of scissors appear in my tack box that aren't mine and I've never seen before, as if someone 'borrowed' them from someone and then forgot where they came from - or is trying to frame me! I've asked everyone about them and nobody claims to be the owner. It's very odd and very frustrating.

 

[dogatemysalad]

I'm sure the selfish gene has always existed, but coupled with todays self entitlement culture, it's become more prevalent.
Unless everything is locked or chained, it's open season on all personal kit and feed. Most yards suffer from people who see all property as communal and as an observation, it's never those who are struggling financially.

 

[PinkvSantaboots]

What a complete arse

 

[Frumpoon]

Terrible behaviour ?

 

[Wishfilly]

She sounds awful and entitled. Obviously it's very annoying about your blades, but if £80 is the price of being shot of her, I suppose it might be worth it?

Wine and sympathy though!

 

[Christmascinnamoncookie]

Shocking! I’m really lucky, nobody takes anything from us, although the helpers used to be quite free with liveries’ brooms etc.

 

[Lois Lame]

... The latest thing, two identical rugs that neither old horse had worn for years but were still there in May when I packed the winter rugs away. I was going to try them on Charlie. The strange thing is, they're at least 6" too big for any other horse on the yard and even if they fitted any other horses we'd certainly notice if they were wearing them as they're bright purple.

Interesting. Reading that, I've decided that people must steal things to sell second hand.

I'm sure the selfish gene has always existed, but coupled with todays self entitlement culture, it's become more prevalent.
Unless everything is locked or chained, it's open season on all personal kit and feed. Most yards suffer from people who see all property as communal and as an observation, it's never those who are struggling financially.

Dare I say it but I think it's a generation or two or three of kids allowed to have everything they want. It's very character building to be brought up NOT being given everything except the important stuff like love etc etc.

 

[Penny Less]

"What's a NOA? "

I think you will find thats Nation of Arse..... Keith
possibly doesnt apply to France !

 

[Keith_Beef]

"What's a NOA? "

I think you will find thats Nation of Arse..... Keith
possibly doesnt apply to France !

Thanks for that. Even Urban Dictionary was no use with that TLA.

 

[maya2008]

You need some way to lock everything up, or to take it all home.