Tearful, serious post- please be nice

After everything you have been through with Fal and now Sam I think that its amazing that you even still want to get back on!! You have made some really tough decisions and gone through some terrible times and as you say Sam is just not for you. You will find the right horse and you will be dondering around in the summer just relaxing and enjoying your riding again, not wondering what is going to happen next .

It takes a much braver person to admit there is a problem rather than bury your head and as each month/week goes by you get less and less confident and things become harder and harder.

Take care & don't beat yourself up about it, you know its the right decision xxx
 
I would say you are being very sensible actually.
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I can totally understand why you might see this as a turning point and I think you are probably doing the right thing.

Best of luck finding a lovely guy who will take care of you as much as you take care of him.
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I've not read all the posts lzt, but I don't think ANYONE could EVER accuse you of 'giving up' on a horse!!!
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You've done brilliantly getting him this far, and now it's time to move on... so go for it!! No one with half a brain would criticise you for doing it and plenty wouldn't have bothered a fraction as much as you have! I'm sure you'll find a brilliant home for Sam and find yourself the perfect neddy
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P.S: Antifaz is for sale!!!
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Izt the only reason you are being a muppet is for thinking anyone on here would think you were one
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(does that make sense? I have had a very long day!)

You have had a dreadful couple of years that I am aware of with horses and I cannot believe some of the things you have been through. Yet you still managed to get up and crack on!

We pay a lot of money out on our horses (and you have had some serious bills I am sure
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) so it is hugely important that we actually get some enjoyment out of it. You have worked wonders on Sam in the time that you have had him and now it is time to think about yourself, your safety and sanity.

I think now is a good time to sell him while you are recuperating and then when you are better you will be able to go shopping for a lovely new neddy
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Be kind to yourself!
 
For all that I'm entitled to an opinion, not knowing you at all, it sounds like a very sensible, hard thought decision.

I work with "problem" horses and their people and I have to say I wish more people would look at the situation as realistically as you are. Just because you CAN do something doesn't mean it's necessarily a good idea. Riding fro pleasure is supposed to be fun and if you're not finding that then you are right to want to make a change. And, I hate to tell you, maybe your horse would be better off elsewhere, maybe even doing another job. Bad dynamics tend to be bad for everyone concerned. It sounds like you've made it possible for him to be sold on to a decent home which means you have done him a great service. I'm sure you could continue to cope with him but why should you "cope"? Find a different mount, better suited to where you are in your life now.
 
Good grief, just logged in to find so many kind replies
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thanks guys.

Apologies for the drama queen post, I guess it is easy to let things get a little blown out of proportion when you are going stir crazy on 'box rest'
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I'm feeling a little more rational this morning and much less self pitying!

Glad you all think I have made the right decision.

...and if anyone knows of a nice safe 16.2 all rounder for sale be sure to point them in my direction
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You've really been through the mill with your last two horses and you've tried so hard with both of them - No-one could accuse you of giving up easily - I wish I had your tenacity!! It's so difficult to find the right horse that will build your confidence and that you can trust with your life (so to speak), but I'm sure your horse of a lifetime is just around the corner, and god have you earned it!! Wishing you loads of good vibes that you meet your dream horse very soon.

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I think the problem is you both lack confidence when jumping so its hard to teach a horse that lacks confidence when your not so confident yourself so you both end up going round in circles.

You have done an amazing job with him (you can see that from the photos) and i dont think that your being a muppet for wanting to sell him. You are both a different stages now and you have brought him on as far as you can so its time for you to start having fun again.

And i echo exactly what Henryhorn says about getting excited about going down and riding them, as soon as that goes then you know its time to sell.

Good luck with whatever you decide to do
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Ditto vicijp!! Don't be so hard on yourself hunny! You've worked wonders with him!! this is your decision to make - end of!! Good luck with finding a new hoss hun!

P.S. Please tell me just how I managed to miss that you have broken your leg??
 
You daft bat - and you are one of them but NOT a muppet!!!!

Horses are very big things to us. They cost a lot, they take up oodles of our time and energy - and if they are not right for you, it spoils everything and you start to resent the time and money and then everything you love about horses seems to be nothing, and everything you hate appears massive, and all of a sudden you wonder why on earth you bother - and thats not right.

Fair enough if you said "I have decided to sell as his colour clashes with my car and trailer" or "my psychic said this horse gives me negative energy" then I'd say shurrup you muppet - but if you aren't enjoying it and the horse really isn't for you, then fair play to you - sell him to someone for whom he might be their dream horse, and find yours.

We have a wee bit of a dilemma with Ivy - and being totally honest we don;t know which way it will go. She was always bred to be Byters replacement for my sister as she will be ready to work when Byter starts to be eased off. However its apparent (as you may see in some of my posts!) that the "Spawn of Satan" is not turning out quite as we expected. She can be terrifying at times, though the sweetest thing at others, and to be honest - respects men a lot more than us!

Much as sister loves her to bits, she knows that there may be a time when she is too much for us and has decided that we will give her the time til she's fully backed and ridden to see if she changes enough for us to manage her - see if the "challenge the owners" tantrums go - in which case she stays. But if it proves that she is going to be too much and risk sister losing her confidence, then she has reached the conclusion after much soul searching, that it would be better for Ivy and for us if she went to a home more suitable.

Now that is with a baby that we bred - and if we can make a decision like that, I certainly wouldn't think less of you for doing the same with Sam.

I think everyone on here agrees that if its how you feel - then go with it - you are not wrong or a muppet or anything bad, in fact I think it shows you are a good and caring owner that you are prepared to do that to improve the situation for both of you, instead of carrying on with something you aren't happy with - it will be better for him too in the long run.

So when we going horsehunting then???
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I haven't read all the replies so probably repeating others, but I think you are brave & sensible to make that decision - too many people struggle on in a mis-matched relationship. It's not the fault of you or the horse - it's just that you are both yet to find your 'perfect partner'.

Well done for admitting it, I hope & guess you'll both be happier for your decison.
 
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First off big ((((((((hugs)))))))))) to you for making a hard decision, secondly, I know exactly where your coming from, as I've been having similar thoughts with Bud for the last few days, when he's going well he's superb, when he's been "off" he's a nightmare.
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Your not a muppet, far from it, and don't put yourself down for making this decision!!!

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Ditto!
Its hard getting back on after an accident. Jeez I thougth long and hard whether keeping winston was right or wrong.
Hes a complete idiot atm due to the weather, snoopy too due to the high winds and watchign him buck and prat around today on the lunge i seriously thought how the hell am i gonna ride that without being committed to a hospital bed.
I think you need to go with your head on this one. You are NOT A MUPPET!
You ahve to do what is right for you and of course your horse! if you feel he would be better off with someone else then go for it.
You had a horrid fall, and i dont blame you for feeling the way you do.
Hugs babe
 
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