The changing face of horse ownership and livery yard bullies

[MumsGloriousOrca]

Recently read this article from a few years ago published in the Spectator which needs a subscription to read in full so I've copied below in its entirety

[Copyright content removed]

Laughed reading this because I understood exactly what this woman was feeling to the point of almost hearing her voice / seeing beautifully her description of someone with a dustpan and brush getting every last flake.

Have experienced it too but wish I could understand or grasp some of the thought processes going on with this sort.

It's not so much owners that aren't that clued up, don't ride (for whatever reason) or owners that are super particular about their routines and how they like to keep their horses because we all have own little ways, preferences and do things differently. It's how this sort of person quickly grows to their way becoming THE way and everyone else falling in line - even the YO's. Why?

Some feel it's their God given right to start systematically going after others in these small mobs usually targeting younger or new / inexperienced riders and shouting them down or running them off the yard.

What is it that gives Mr Minty & Co any amount of clout on yards?

 

[JennBags]

Not been my experience of being on yards at all. There's been the odd woman like this but mostly they've just got on with it. It read like a pretty nasty article to be honest.

 

[DirectorFury]

That article has some valid points but they’re largely lost in some of the vile attacks on other people.

 

[JFTDWS]

As someone who rides their horses all the bloody time, even when nobody else on the yard is...

I can't say I've ever encountered anything like that, and I find the entire article very distasteful. I'm also not convinced it's acceptable to reproduce an article from behind a paywall.

 

[Equi]

LOL this is funny. I barely brush my horse before a ride. Im doomed. My poor poor horse.

I did know someone like this though. Everything had to be "natural" and slow and blabalbla. She just could not face the fact her horse she got at 6yo scared the shit out of her to ride and as a result he then could not ride due to lack of education.

My very good friend would be of the picking up poo with gloves type and horse can't be out of the stable more than an hour or he will be stolen/get pneumonia/gets stressed etc i told her to wise the hell up the reason he is stressed is HER. She finally listened and has a happier horse for it!

 

[MumsGloriousOrca]

Not been my experience of being on yards at all. There's been the odd woman like this but mostly they've just got on with it. It read like a pretty nasty article to be honest.

Fair enough and that's one reason I wanted to post it really – it's one of those things I think people understand immediately because they recognise it from personal experience or it won't ring or seem at all the case.

Never had this until maybe five years ago but never used livery yards personally until having my sister's horse moved to a yard and I was sorting and seeing to him. Through various reasons and several friends and other yards, I really did meet these very people which are one thing if they just went about their own business but they didn't – they couldn't it was weird.

I'm curious as to what others experience it seems concentrated, almost rife in some areas and yards but not seen much at all in others.

 

[milliepops]

I've been on yards that had self-professed experts but I just ignored them if I didn't want their input and found it reasonably easy to get on with things my own way.

Like others I also find the article unnecessarily spiteful.

 

[MumsGloriousOrca]

LOL this is funny. I barely brush my horse before a ride. Im doomed. My poor poor horse.I did know someone like this though. Everything had to be "natural" and slow and blabalbla. She just could not face the fact her horse she got at 6yo scared the shit out of her to ride and as a result he then could not ride due to lack of education.

Was that the main reason she gave up the riding do you think - being scared and then never quite regaining her confidence again? I've heard the same thing from several others it seems aren't able to admit to having been knocked back or thought it was a bad thing to admit I dunno.

Have to head off for tonight but I'm really interested in what people have / haven't experienced so appreciate any and all sides of stuff.

 

[be positive]

I have had many clients on my yard, some with unusual ideas about their horse care, or lack of, but have rarely had any unridden equines most have been ridden regularly, kept fairly fit and any that did not do the job required were usually sold on and replaced with one that would.
The only horses here kept as pets tend to be a few of mine, I currently have 3 doing nothing other than being horses, my yard, my choice, my horses are happy and that is all that matters.

 

[SOS]

Lost me at ‘Horribly fat...suspiciously Thin...alcoholics’. What a nasty article!

And I say this as someone who doesn’t understand owning horses without the purpose of riding them - whether purely for leisure or competing. Mainly due to the huge costs of keeping horses which separates them from other ‘pets’.

 

[Surbie]

Wow. Kudos for managing to write that article despite the weight of the massive chip on her shoulder.

I agree with others - it's nasty and spiteful.

 

[Equi]

Was that the main reason she gave up the riding do you think - being scared and then never quite regaining her confidence again? I've heard the same thing from several others it seems aren't able to admit to having been knocked back or thought it was a bad thing to admit I dunno.

Have to head off for tonight but I'm really interested in what people have / haven't experienced so appreciate any and all sides of stuff.

It was. She came off him early on and never got that confidence back so everything became about ground work and trust and slowly slowly etc and ill admit that horse adores her and can do liberty like something out of heartland which i was always very jealous of. Im saying it like they never got on, but eventually her confidence did grow and after about three years she is now riding him but still not in contact or pushing him etc. I rode him once and he just seemed like a very confused horse and didn't understand anything that was being asked, but thats just how he was trained and my way of riding as i was train was not for him. It doesn't bother me, you do you, but he is a fantastic looking friesian type who could have done alot more. But then a horse doesnt know any better and he is definitely a happy horse.

 

[honetpot]

I am a live and let live sort of person but the article is so close to reality that I could not say it was spiteful.

I have nothing against people who do not ride their horses, but the over stuffed sofa of a horse that is enrobed in the lastest coloured rug for that season, and fed every single feed that builds top line, well thats what the ads say, so when spring comes it has a creast so hard that you wonder how on earth has it not got laminitis, has become more common. Saying it doesn't need a rug over its thick wooly coat is tantamount to admitting your a horse abuser.
I get the loose schooling, usually an excuse for either lack of knowledge or idleness, I have yet to see anyone do it properly on a livery yard. The horse charges around with no control or purpose and skids to a halt in the corners. I suppose better than those that buy the latest gadget strap the horse in and then lunge the legs off it in a tight circle.
Then there are the ones who spend all their time in the tea room, to pull people to pieces. We had trouble on the yard I was at livery, I got a whole load of abuse,which was water off a ducks back, from someone who said I was talking behind her back. I pointed out that I was the only one not talking about her, but it did make me wonder who gave her the misinformation.
I once fed my horses for three days on the foot deep 'waste' hay in the barn, and yes people do just dip their hay and then drag it in the mud across the yard. I have also seen people use rubber gloves to muck out, what ever floats your boat but I just wouldn't have the time.
I am completely fed up with all the guff that is written and sold to people, and I just can not get my head round how gullible people are. They want something magic to make the horse bond with them, then everything will be OK. When in reality it either needs more turnout, more consistant exercise or less food to 'give it topline'. When you tell them this, if they ever ask you for advice, which is rare, they would rather listen to someone who they have paid to get the crystals out.

I do not care if people are fat, thin or have a drink problem, but I do care when the horses welfare needs are not met because the owner refuses to realise that their welfare needs are not their horses. There are now some excellant guides produced by World Horse Welfare,https://www.worldhorsewelfare.org/advice but looking at Facebook no one is reading them.
A horse does not have to be ridden, I have several who are not, they are quite happy in their herd, they group round the water trough like men at the bar, there is no shame in not competing, I never did, but not knowing how to do things,not even trying to get information from reliable sources and pretending that the horse thinks like humans is just madness.

I have some lovely horsey friends, I suppose we all get along because we are the same ageish and started riding, and worked with horses when horses where worked towards a purpose and treated like athletes even if we did not use modern terminolgy.
Yes I am a grumpy old women, so it may not be your yard but I have seen enough over the years to know these people do exist.

 

[Mule]

I never get why people care so much about what other people do with their horses. It doesn't matter to me if someone competes, hacks, hunts, or doesn't ride, each to their own 🤷

 

[cauda equina]

Perhaps she had a tight deadline to meet and just wrote the first thing that came into her head
I think it illustrates the pitfalls of trying to be amusing, and reminds me of some of the pieces at the back of H&H - meant to be funny but just came across as mean

 

[ycbm]

I am really puzzled why anyone would want to join a forum and make that their first thread.

Nasty article, dragged up from two and a half years ago, calculated to create a nasty thread.
.

 

[Archangel]

Who wrote that spiteful drivel - Boris Johnson?

 

[The Fuzzy Furry]

Who wrote that spiteful drivel - Boris Johnson?

Possibly the OP?

 

[eahotson]

I never get why people care so much about what other people do with their horses. It doesn't matter to me if someone competes, hacks, hunts, or doesn't ride, each to their own 🤷

Agree.

 

[Asha]

Nope , don’t get it. It’s not funny at all.
If people want to own a horse to just pat and care for what’s wrong with that . There are plenty of horses needing that. Live and let live I say .

 

[Bellaboo18]

Horrible article.
Other than the over feeding mentioned in the article, I can't see a problem. Most horses are happy to be pets.
I've definitely never met a horse owner that thought it was cruel to ride.

 

[Lurfy]

Bizarre article, quite a negative view of non riders. Live and let live, as said above.

 

[Ambers Echo]

Read it and started feeling queasy within a paragraph or 2. Spiteful, bullying, does not ring true at all and also very badly written. Not relatable, not funny, not accurate and I'm bloody glad I don't share a yard with the writer.

 

[Ambers Echo]

ETA there are plenty of non riders on our yard. And plenty of people who compete. So?

 

[The Trooper]

I sort of understand some of the points made, but ultimately it's about whatever makes you happy, that's why I own horse's and that's why I ride my horses.

I'm in the live and let live camp, as long as I am left alone to do my own thing I'm not fussed about what others are doing at the yard.

 

[luckyoldme]

I think we are doing what the new member/old member new name wants us to do.
Personally im just wondering if i fit into the very tiny margin of ok weight people. ...im size14 but my arse is still massive..is that ok?

 

[honetpot]

I never get why people care so much about what other people do with their horses. It doesn't matter to me if someone competes, hacks, hunts, or doesn't ride, each to their own 🤷

You have obviously never met the owners who use their horse ownerships as a form of one up man ship. I know some who in their words owned a hunter, but it was lucky if it went for an hours hack. It’s a badge of honour if they think they have rescued something when really they have bought something that just has a woolly coat and a straggly mane, and what ever time of the year it is, of course proof of them caring is they buy it a rug.
My answer when I asked do you ride, was no I sit on them. That usually stopped the next question, what do you do with them? The answer being, not a lot. Then that would give them the opening to say who they trained with, where they competed and what they had qualified for.
It’s funny when you are an adult but with children who can feel pressured, it takes a lot of support to make them see what is really going on and what ever they did as long as they and their pony had fun what ever other people did was irrelevant.
There is a huge amount of snobbery in riding which some of the attitudes expressed by people who work for the BHS seem to want to continue. If a horse is not ridden or competing very little effort is spent on horse welfare in the general sense. Hence why WHW has stepped in with its free advice guides. So I think the divide between the non rider, especially if they have never ridden, and people who keep horses just to ride will get wider.

 

[holeymoley]

What a load of absolute guff.

Do we think op may be the writer?

Just a general musing 🤷🏼‍♀️

 

[milliepops]

I am a live and let live sort of person but the article is so close to reality that I could not say it was spiteful.

I have nothing against people who do not ride their horses, but the over stuffed sofa of a horse that is enrobed in the lastest coloured rug for that season, and fed every single feed that builds top line, well thats what the ads say, so when spring comes it has a creast so hard that you wonder how on earth has it not got laminitis, has become more common. Saying it doesn't need a rug over its thick wooly coat is tantamount to admitting your a horse abuser.
I get the loose schooling, usually an excuse for either lack of knowledge or idleness, I have yet to see anyone do it properly on a livery yard. The horse charges around with no control or purpose and skids to a halt in the corners. I suppose better than those that buy the latest gadget strap the horse in and then lunge the legs off it in a tight circle.
Then there are the ones who spend all their time in the tea room, to pull people to pieces. We had trouble on the yard I was at livery, I got a whole load of abuse,which was water off a ducks back, from someone who said I was talking behind her back. I pointed out that I was the only one not talking about her, but it did make me wonder who gave her the misinformation.
I once fed my horses for three days on the foot deep 'waste' hay in the barn, and yes people do just dip their hay and then drag it in the mud across the yard. I have also seen people use rubber gloves to muck out, what ever floats your boat but I just wouldn't have the time.
I am completely fed up with all the guff that is written and sold to people, and I just can not get my head round how gullible people are. They want something magic to make the horse bond with them, then everything will be OK. When in reality it either needs more turnout, more consistant exercise or less food to 'give it topline'. When you tell them this, if they ever ask you for advice, which is rare, they would rather listen to someone who they have paid to get the crystals out.

I do not care if people are fat, thin or have a drink problem, but I do care when the horses welfare needs are not met because the owner refuses to realise that their welfare needs are not their horses. There are now some excellant guides produced by World Horse Welfare,https://www.worldhorsewelfare.org/advice but looking at Facebook no one is reading them.
A horse does not have to be ridden, I have several who are not, they are quite happy in their herd, they group round the water trough like men at the bar, there is no shame in not competing, I never did, but not knowing how to do things,not even trying to get information from reliable sources and pretending that the horse thinks like humans is just madness.

I have some lovely horsey friends, I suppose we all get along because we are the same ageish and started riding, and worked with horses when horses where worked towards a purpose and treated like athletes even if we did not use modern terminolgy.
Yes I am a grumpy old women, so it may not be your yard but I have seen enough over the years to know these people do exist.

I've been on enough yards to know there are know it alls and bullies and people who think they know best and love nothing more than to tell you everything you are doing wrong, and the list goes on.
But this article does nothing to improve relations, laying into people for spurious reasons (I'm a vegetarian and don't see why that's relevant for instance...) doesn't give the author the moral high ground!

 

[Goldenstar]

I have no time for people with fat over fed horses who get no exercise .
I have no time for overfed horses full stop .
i have sympathy for those with good doers who can’t for what ever reason give them enough exercise because that’s hard to deal with
But I have not seen what the writer of the intemperate article is getting at its my experience that most of the non riders secretly admire the riders .
my experience is when you get those rider hating non riders jealousy drives most of them they are scared to do it themselves and take it out on those who get on and ride
iI do agree with her on loose schooling and groundwork some people ruin horses doing this badly .
while I agree it’s about what makes you happy but only up to a point if what makes you happy is shovelling food into an already fat horse while piling rugs on it when it’s 8 degrees it’s not ok .
I love feeding horses , sadly I also love ID’s so I have use my energy finding creative ways of feeding them less .