The ordinary horse owner Olympics

[Annagain]

I'm bored and have been musing about Olympic sports for the ordinary horse owner. May I offer:
- Bin day hacking - marks for height of leap, speed of spin and artistic impression. Bonus points for number of passing pedestrians terrified.
- Fly mask hunting - a straight time trial, fastest owner back with horse's missing fly mask wins. For fairness, all masks will be in a 5 acre field with at least 7 trees and no more than one fenced boundary, the rest must be hedges. Ground must be undulating so no mask can be seen from a distance of more than 30m.

Any more?.

 

[muddybay]

Shoe hunting in a muddy field in winter the day before an important event

 

[AShetlandBitMeOnce]

The Poo Toss

Equipment: A shavings fork, a wheelbarrow, a nugget of poo

The Aim: Who can hit the wheelbarrow with 100% accuracy at increasing distances/angles to the wheelbarrow.

 

[Esmae]

Lost shoe hunting. 3 day event. Whoever manages to find the wretched within the 3 days is on a gold medal podium! Trouser soaking. Varied events over one day. from spilling a bucket of water over yourself, to lifting soaked haynet without drowning yourself. Picking up the sweepings from the yard without the use of a shovel or poo picker. Marked on how much is left on the floor after 3 goes at removal.

 

[Annagain]

Shoe hunting in a muddy field in winter the day before an important event

That'll be for the winter Olympics, along with ice breaking on troughs, emergency rug repairing and negotiating the hill to the yard on frosty mornings.

 

[vhf]

Wheelbarrow uphill push
Open gate dash
Bale-stacking
Windy day synchronised spooking.
Loose-horse catch (bonus points for avoiding other competitors)
...

 

[Birker2020]

Due to the ongoing drought, trying to negotiate your way with your horse to its paddock without it stopping to try and grab anything that looks remotely green!
Trying to work out why a horse is lame and guessing what's wrong with it.
Fastest poo picker
Fastest hay net filler (a job I loathe)

 

[misst]

Getting one spooky horse out of the gate whilst surrounded by other spooky loose horses. Elimination if loose horses escape. Quickest through the gate (and to shut gate firmly behind themselves) with the correct horse wins.

 

[Fransurrey]

The Poo Toss

Equipment: A shavings fork, a wheelbarrow, a nugget of poo

The Aim: Who can hit the wheelbarrow with 100% accuracy at increasing distances/angles to the wheelbarrow.

As a variation of this 'discus' style event, may I propose the 'Poo putt'. Similar to shavings fork and wheelbarrow, but a full scoop of poo hurled over a hedge or fence. Points scored for distance and/or height of putt (I have so got the gold in this one).

 

[littleshetland]

You know that point when it's been really muddy - liquid mud and hoof picking's not a problem.......then it starts to dry out and goes really claggy and hoof pick almost 'bounces' off the top of their feet and you just can't get their feet picked without a lot of swearing.
Might I suggest a hoof pick 'pick off'...?

 

[littleshetland]

Due to the ongoing drought, trying to negotiate your way with your horse to its paddock without it stopping to try and grab anything that looks remotely green!
Trying to work out why a horse is lame and guessing what's wrong with it.
Fastest poo picker
Fastest hay net filler (a job I loathe)

God I hate hay nets too....

 

[Annagain]

You know that point when it's been really muddy - liquid mud and hoof picking's not a problem.......then it starts to dry out and goes really claggy and hoof pick almost 'bounces' off the top of their feet and you just can't get their feet picked without a lot of swearing.
Might I suggest a hoof pick 'pick off'...?

Your name just made me think of escaped shetland retrieval. Most little blighters rounded up in 10 minutes wins.

 

[littleshetland]

Your name just made me think of escaped shetland retrieval. Most little blighters rounded up in 10 minutes wins.

Yes, my little shetland goes ands hides behind the nearest big horse and I end up playing 'roundabouts' with him until he gives in eventually. I think I might not even get a bronze in this event.....

 

[Birker2020]

You know that point when it's been really muddy - liquid mud and hoof picking's not a problem.......then it starts to dry out and goes really claggy and hoof pick almost 'bounces' off the top of their feet and you just can't get their feet picked without a lot of swearing.
Might I suggest a hoof pick 'pick off'...?

Yes I know what you mean, frustrating.

 

[vhf]

You know that point when it's been really muddy - liquid mud and hoof picking's not a problem.......then it starts to dry out and goes really claggy and hoof pick almost 'bounces' off the top of their feet and you just can't get their feet picked without a lot of swearing.
Might I suggest a hoof pick 'pick off'...?

I usually end up with blood everywhere, have a quick panic and then realise it's only mine... Not entering this one thank you.

 

[MiJodsR2BlinkinTite]

Summer Horse-Lympics: who can hose-down as many horses as possible within a given time-span AND keep themselves perfectly dry.......

Another Summer one: who can get the most leccy fencing spikes into the ground in under 10 mins on cement-like pasture.

Winter Horse-Lympics: who can lead the most horses through a muddy gateway and stay upright without loosing a welly boot in the mud ........

Another Winter one: finding the welly boot(s) from the above activity.

 

[catkin]

My ponies would suggest that the medals (deliciously edible of course) should be for the equine competitors - the humans are mere obstacles/marks/sports equipment.

Their suggestions for games include
- Bad Words accumulator, most swearing from human wins
- statues, who can get nearest to unsuspecting human without being noticed wins
- headcollar removal,various categories of speed class, headcollar, bridle, etc. Also with style bonuses for knocking over/dragging human.

And that's without the Vandalism World Games........

 

[ycbm]

The hay soaker challenge.

Who can soak, drain and tie up haynets while staying the most dry.


The muddy rug challenge.

Who can remove and hang up to dry a mud covered rug from a 17 hand horse, winner is the cleanest person, no ppe allowed.
.

 

[Birker2020]

Who can remove and hang up to dry a mud covered rug from a 17 hand horse, winner is the cleanest person, no ppe allowed.
.

I have this to a tee now. It's not very BHS and you need a sensible horse. Undo front straps, undo neck, undo x-surcingles, undo rear leg straps.

Hold rug around top of tail area and pull off horse. Once on floor do up front breast strap, lift off floor whilst holding breast strap so open part of rug is in front of you (therefore not getting you dirty) and put over hook with done up breast strap, whilst twisting body away from muddy outer as you do so

 

[The Fuzzy Furry]

Equine clipping challenge, winter games.

Each entrant to complete a hunter clip in fastest time, bonus points given for neatest finish.
Initial rounds will be held at one of the horse sales, the ones who come out unscathed and with horses that have a recognisable clip, go onto finals.

 

[HeyMich]

The trailer poo height chart...

Who's horse can do the tallest vertical pile of poo while on a 1 mile journey.

 

[MiJodsR2BlinkinTite]

Ohh my!

I'm trying to eat flippin' Shortbread biscuits here (made 'em yesterday), am just laffing, spitting 'em everywhere!

Some of these are just hilarious!

 

[Annagain]

oooh, concrete skiing. Attach participants to bolshy Welsh Cobs on a concrete surface. Shake a bucket of feed 50m away. Person who stays on their feet the longest while being dragged by said Welshies is crowned champion.

 

[SEL]

oooh, concrete skiing. Attach participants to bolshy Welsh Cobs on a concrete surface. Shake a bucket of feed 50m away. Person who stays on their feet the longest while being dragged by said Welshies is crowned champion.

After yesterday I'd like to add Ardennes surfing. Line up on yard. Give each competitor a lead rope attached to said tank of horse and bring farrier on yard (vet is also acceptable). See how quickly humans can be towed across field to largest patch of nettles.

 

[Surbie]

Poo picking challenge

Who can keep the most poo in their barrow and deliver it to the pile on the boundary of the field in the least amount of time.
Field will be hilly, rutty and filled with ponies who have suddenly overcome their wheelbarrow fear (reserved for the yard) who only want to investigate and 'help'. For seasonal variation, add mud.

 

[Celtic Fringe]

Hunt the pony. First one to spot the dark bay sheltering in the shade in a 10 acre field with trees round three sides.
Variation - hunt the pony who should be in a smallish paddock but has gone AWOL in search for the non-existent grass (found 5 paddocks away). However, I think that has already been suggested by Annagain?

Fastest to successfully get wormer into 'reluctant' Welsh D (marks deducted for audible swearing and blood on human ) ....

 

[Elno]

Timed event- trim mane, tail and feathers as fast and tidy as possible. Minus points will be given for uneveness, horse fidgeting and blood loss (yours or the horse!).

 

[criso]

Who goes first. Trying to get a horse out of a muddy gate with 5 other horses who want to come in. Single and doubles version with 2 horses to get out Points lost for each escapee. Extra points if the gate needs lifting and dragging and the chosen horse doesn't want to come in.

Windy day dressage. Trying to school on a windy day in a manege that backs into the turnout fields with several excitable horses galloping around.

Variation of the above where the drive has fields on either side and you hack past as all the horses gallop down to the fence. Points for elevation and airs above the group.

Barn stealth operation. Walking through the barn with a bucket without every single horse putting it's head over the door and demanding dinner.

From the horses point of view, Escape room. How far can you get if you untie yourself when tied in the barn while person is in the stable mucking out. Points for how many other stables you can visit and haynets you can sample before you're caught. Points lost if you knock over something alerting humans.

 

[ponynutz]

Running a wheelbarrow up an ever increasing muck heap - whoever caves first and puts a plank on it loses.

 

[Peglo]

Who can get hoof boots on quickest

rutted field, full wheelbarrow race. Who didn’t plant, has the fullest wheelbarrow or isn’t crying in anger at the end wins.

I definitely lose the lost shoe search. I’m still finding ones from 5-14 years ago ?