Things that your " Horsey Kids " Say that make you laugh!

[SadKen]

Hehe great thread.

When I was small I decided that calling horses 'horseys' was too babyish. I therefore extended this rule to any noun ending in 'ey', so donkeys and monkeys became donks and monks. I also became vegetarian at about 3, and tried to train my appendix to process grass by... eating grass. Didn't work.

 

[muff747]

My young grandson came to ride my friends pony. We were at the yard alone and I got grandson on board but saddle hadn't got stirrups on.
He was bobbling about (on the shetland) so I said I'll go find some stirrups.
We fitted some on and he was much more secure.
Friend arrived at stables, and said to my gs "Look at you riding" to which my exited gs said "Ye - and I'm much safer now I've got stablisers on!"

 

[horsey4life]

Reminds me of the other week a little girl from our livery yard was telling her dad about one of the horses rather loudly "Look daddy, that one's a man!" You can guess why!

 

[LynH]

My nephew aged 6 told his class that my horse was going to have a baby and then proceeded to tell them that to make a foal you put a straw of ice cream up the horse's bottom and blow!!!!
My sister rang me asking what I had told him. He must have overheard me telling my mum that a friend had given me some straws of frozen semen to AI my mare and my mum had asked 'do they just lift her tail and pop them in?' At least I could blame grandma for that one ;0)

 

[Vinney]

Several years ago my grand daughter was a bit miffed at not doing well at her riding lesson and came home to tell us that 'They are just big furry gay things with legs and she had had enough of them'. Needless to say this statement has followed her around over the last few years. She still rides so they could'nt have been that bad.

 

[Avonbrook]

One of mine as a toddler was in the queue at the Post Office with my Mum - one where the queue was between tapes and then a choice of counter spaces at the end. Being electric fence trained, she asked in her best loud voice "is it on Granny?" leaving everyone looking at my mother like she was the worst child abuser out...

 

[Annagain]

Not a horsey child but when my cousin brought her son to see the horses, Archie had a wee in front of us. My nephew got all all excited and shouted "mummy he's got a fold away willy, can I have one?"

 

[Quantock-cob]

I like the funny ones where the kids are saying cute things. But I would have been mortified if either of my two shouted out rude and demeaning comments to other riders. Really not something to be proud of and laugh at. From a young age children should be taught that saying rude things to people can upset them and make them sad. Do you also allow your children to laugh at disabled people in the street? Small 5 year olds, turn into precocious 10 yr olds, which turn into offensive 15 yr olds. If they never are corrected for their bluntness and rudeness they will assume it is normal and carry on doing it. And when I hear small children coming out with things like "oh that was crap" and "what an ugly horse" - I automatically think they have heard their parents/ grandparents saying that. But the horse world is full of blunt, rude adults, so maybe it is all OK then.

 

[cob&onion]

My colt had his gelding op a month or so back, my 7yr old daughter told everyone he was poorly after having his *tenticles* removed

 

[Dizzy socks]

I really have to stop resurrecting ancient threads when I am bored of an evening...

 

[Feival]

Whilst at the yard recently, My non horsey sister asked why my horses had plastic bags on their heads, to which my 5yo Niece said 'no mummy they are fly masks to stop the flies hurting their eye's' and my 3yo niece pipped up with ' Dash looks like batman in his'!!

 

[On the Hoof]

I really have to stop resurrecting ancient threads when I am bored of an evening...

Well I'm glad you did....thankyou have nearly p*** myself reading this brilliant thread.

 

[FfionWinnie]

I mentioned this on the other thread but today my daughter reckoned she as able to canter her pony for the first time as she had "canterloup" melon for breakfast

And we crashed a jump while competing the other night and daughter (4) proclaimed loudly from the side "Mummy you shouldn't have done that!!! You knocked it down!!!!!! You will have to jump smaller jumps if you can't jump high enough!"

Obviously as I was still competing I wasn't paying enough attention to her "advice" as she repeated it several times as I was leaving the ring

 

[tinap]

The daughter had her first driving lesson the other day (car not horse ). She came back with a great beam on her face & said " the instructor said I learned that quick driving round left turns that he let me have a go on my right rein too"! She didn't get why I was chuckling which made it all the more funny

 

[Gwena]

My 10year old was bathing our farriers colt-which by the "size of things " was going to be a very well endowed stallion. Think the water out of the hose turned a bit cold and he sucked his testicals up & away. Cue my daughter turning ashen & saying she thinks she might have accidently gelded him. ....... shes never lived that one down! !!!

 

[ChestnutTinker]

My 10year old was bathing our farriers colt-which by the "size of things " was going to be a very well endowed stallion. Think the water out of the hose turned a bit cold and he sucked his testicals up & away. Cue my daughter turning ashen & saying she thinks she might have accidently gelded him. ....... shes never lived that one down! !!!

Omg!! Hahaha! This one is the best

 

[Megibo]

Glad this thread was resurrected, love it!

 

[tonkatoy]

i'm not sure what was happening 6 years and 9 months ago, but there's an awful lot of people on here with 6yr olds!!!!

that's equally as impressive as the things they say!!

 

[BlizzardBudd]

The daughter had her first driving lesson the other day (car not horse ). She came back with a great beam on her face & said " the instructor said I learned that quick driving round left turns that he let me have a go on my right rein too"! She didn't get why I was chuckling which made it all the more funny

When driving I say things like that.. My friends absolutely kill themselves when I find myself talking to the car at traffic lights with 'scary' machinery

 

[Dizzy socks]

I'm pretty sure this is the third time I've brought this back.

More people need to enjoy it ;D

It's my "favourites" link to H and H, so I always see it when I come to H and H (not intentional )

 

[Sukistokes2]

When my eldest was about 4 he came in limping. I asked him what was wrong he said.
'My feet hurt, I'm worried it's laminitis'

Ha ha ha ha ha ha!!! Love this one......!!!!

 

[FestiveFuzz]

My 10year old was bathing our farriers colt-which by the "size of things " was going to be a very well endowed stallion. Think the water out of the hose turned a bit cold and he sucked his testicals up & away. Cue my daughter turning ashen & saying she thinks she might have accidently gelded him. ....... shes never lived that one down! !!!

This is definitely my favourite!

 

[Red-1]

My instructors 6 year old son born and raised on a stud/teaching yard asked his mum where babies come from she proceeded to explain about daddy putting his seed into mummy. Son replies "like the stallions at home do?" She replies "a bit like like that" to which he replied but where will daddy get the students from to watch!?!?!?!? I

LOL!!!!

 

[mairiwick]

Great thread!

My 3 year old came up to the yard with me while the vet was there giving the mare her injections. Stable door slightly open, there she stood watching. As the needle went in she burst into tears and ran down the aisle to the car park gate. I had no idea what happened until she told me the nasty man stabbed the horse. Had to reassure her he wasn't evil and it was a good jab!
Mind you, the week before I had taken her and her baby brother along to the drs for their jabs and had my contraceptive injection done at the same time. Told her it went in my bum so she would laugh and find it funny and she outed me to the entire waiting room "no mummy! Not your bum!" And cried again. Sensitive (but embarrassing) soul!

 

[Greylegs]

This thread is brightening up my morning .... Hilarious.

I once asked my friend's 4 year old what mummy's horse is called.

"F%€^*ing B%^*¥$d" came the innocent reply! I looked a bit "surprised" and said "that's an unusual name".

"Well that's what she calls it, anyway" came the innocent response!