Think Kelly1982 derserves an apology...

[bandit]

guys.... lets all please get a grip....

since when do we slate each other up when someone was just having a little moan in a place where we have always supported and offered help and advice??? We've all had a moan before and we've all supported each other, so please take a check on how people have reacted to her post - she's actually really very upset.

i know Kelly really well, we worked together for years, I know her horses, I've been to her yard and although I haven't met the others at the yard I have met one of them - the girl who does sometimes gives her lifts to shows and does very well herself BSJA.

Now Kelly was just having a little moan as the personalities at her yard have become 'odd' and she was just relaying the next installment of her issues with them. Whether or not it came across exactly as it was intended and how it is in 'real life', it doesn't give people the free for all to slate / slag her off, especially as the majority appear not to know her at all...

Of course Kelly is desperate to get to shows, to have lessons and to be helpful to others, but when has taking your own personal show jumps out of a paddock - becuase these odd people don't want Kelly and her friend to use them - but insist on NOT using their own wheel barrow - but Kelly's rational?? Kelly and her friend have provided support and encouragement to said ODD peoples kids - helping them with thier jumping etc... They've put up with said kids using and not returning everythign from tack to brushes etc... and not really made a fuss of it - it happens..??

I know for a fact that those short on transport really do rely and appreciate the offers of lifts and Kelly would always work around people's arrangments and help out in order to get lifts. If she had transport I also know she would offer up any spare spaces if people were at risk of loosing an opportunity to go to a show.

Whether or not people do give others lifts to a show is one thing, and it's not illegal to do so - it only becomes illegal and invalidates insurance if money were to change hands - Hire and Reward.

Please have a think before responding to posts so venumously - whether they are Kelly's or not. She's quite upset and if she has come across as 'spoilt' i can whole heartedly say she's not - she's the most generous person I htink you'll come across.... She helped me with Ludo, came with me (& drove me) to view my new horse Bonnie - let me ride her new horse Senza (scary ride!!) and took me on a hack with another horse...

Sorry for the long rant, but it upsets me to think you've all upset her over this, and lets hope the matter is closed..

Bx

 

[Sparklet]

I'm sure with friends like you she will be fine

 

[horsegirl]

I agree some of the posts were a bit unpleasant but the rest of us can only respond to the information we are given. It is certainly not worth getting upset over the opinions of people on here, most of whom you don't know and will never meet.

 

[bandit]

I think the language and insults used by some were a bit cutting, and un-necessary... It's a shame people react like that too...

Bx

 

[Parkranger]

I believe that some people like to 'gang up' on people - once somebody has said something negative, everyone has a dig.....

The original post did come out a bit weird, but I'm sure that most rational people can see that sometimes you're so closely involved in something that you can't look at a situation rationally.....instead of putting the boot in! x

 

[KarenX]

Wow, firstly Kelly is lucky to have such a good mate as you!

I did read the post and think eeeek, thats a bit strong!

Poor Kelly - I hope it wont stop her posting coz I do like hearing about Senza.

Karen

 

[bandit]

well i hope not but at the moment i don't think she'll want to for fear people will think she's doing things wrong with her etc... Senza is lovely and Kelly is a very talented rider - she derserves good results hence her real wish to be out competing - !!

 

[Agent XXX999]

Please see my below post – I didn’t reply because I was shocked at the way people reacted!

I cannot afford (or legally drive) transport so I am always scrimping around for a lift…there is nothing wrong with that, it has been going on for years – and when I was a wee young thing and we had a lorry my Dad was happy for the Diesel money!

That is besides the point –Kelly…there was no reason to be jumped on like that. Don’t worry about it! Xxx

 

[Kelly1982]

Aww thanks mate

You know better than anyone what i am like so thank you for standing up for me on this one.

Its not just me that eveyone has ganged up on either, there are so many posts like this, at least one a day and i just cant understand why people need to be so nasty and calling people names etc. Its hard to put the whole in's and out's on every post and you have to shorten it down some what so people shouldn't be so quick to judge.

I really didn't think this would bother me but it has happened to me twice now and its really upsetting.

 

[TGM]

Well I don't think the majority of posters on that thread were rude or 'jumping' on Kelly - they were just trying to look at the situation from the other person's point of view. Trouble is, when several people express similar opinions, it looks like they are 'ganging up', when that isn't really the case. I do agree though that one particular poster worded her thoughts rather more harshly and untactfully than others.

 

[miamibear]

Kelly, im not sure what has happened, i dont want to troll through the whole post but i wouldnt listen to people.

We all love ya!! Dont listen and hopefully people will be more tactful next time if they dont agree with people.

Just underlines my point that this forum is getting so impersonal, if people knew you they would know you are a really nice person, you have been nothing but supportive to me

I am another of those without own transport and i echo bandits point we all do really appreciate lifts to shows, real friends would offer lifts when they can, only one reason not to. You and Senza would show them up!! Look at it that way hun and ignore!!

xx

 

[Kelly1982]

Hi Karen

Bandit is a good mate of mine, one of my only true friends in fact and she knows me better than most and that i am not a drama queen or a spoilt brat.

Just a shame she lives so far away from me

 

[AmyMay]

[ QUOTE ]
Well I don't think the majority of posters on that thread were rude or 'jumping' on Kelly - they were just trying to look at the situation from the other person's point of view. Trouble is, when several people express similar opinions, it looks like they are 'ganging up', when that isn't really the case.

[/ QUOTE ]
I agree. It was certainly not my intention to upset.

 

[Tia]

I had no idea about the reason for this post.....but I have read the other thread now.

Accepted there were a handful of posts that maybe went a bit below the belt, however the general gist was that people were just trying to see it from the other person's perspective??

The only thing that I raised an eyebrow over was not understanding why Kelly didn't give the lady the instructors telephone number - seemed awfully chirlish to me.

I like Kelly though so am not getting into it.

 

[Kelly1982]

Amymay you didn't upset me at all, everyone is intitled to their opinion.

Its when the remarks started getting b*tchy and people started calling me names that was upsetting.

Constructive critism (sp) i can take

 

[jennystreek]

I have to say that there are some real "odd" cases on this forum, and that Kelly seems to have been picked on here!!! I dont think that anything you wrote was at all making you spoilt or a drama queen. From what i read, you obviously have done this woman a favour by introducing her to your instructor, and it would have been nice for her to offer you a lift or at least explain her reasons for not wanting you to travel with her. Its called "courtesy" and would be a nice human gesture! i understand where you are coming from, and those people on here who have attacked you for no reason....well all i can say is they must have a few problems in their life and need someone to take it out on!! Its not just you though, if you read the watchdog post there are a few people there that have been unneccessarily attacked by a few "know it alls, high and mightys".

I have only recently got a horsebox, and always try to make sure it is full up whenever we go to a show - and yes, people do pay diesel money, so whoever it was that was talking b*llocks about it being illegal etc etc, well tell them to stop being so pedantic - IT HAPPENS ALL THE TIME, and you are simply sharing the costs, its not her making money in a business way.

So carry on sharing your posts and just humour the nut cases that seem to get a rise out of picking holes in everything you say....and i hope they read this to realise how pathetic they sound

 

[Kelly1982]

I wasn't being childish at all, i was gonna give her the number, i just mentioned that the instructor was coming the following week and the lady dropped it.

If she said that she would like to have it anyway then i would of given it to her. I didn't put the whole conversation in the post coz otherwise it would of been 10 pages long LOL

I didn't have the number on me at the time anyway and nothing was mentioned about it again so i just assumed she was waiting for our sand school to de-flood like i was.

 

[Kelly1982]

Thanks Mel that really means alot x

 

[KarenX]

Well Kelly - you only need one really true and loyal mate!

Mine lives in Canada but I know I could ring her or turn up on her doorstep and she would always help me.

Just remember this isnt real life, so its not personal really..

Karen

 

[Tempi]

in all honesty hun a few of us have been through similar things on here, like i said to kelly you've just got to take it on the chin and ignore it. after all it is only a forum. i know some of the comments were uncalled for and not at all helpful in anyway but thats the way it is on here sometimes.

 

[Agent XXX999]

So am I bad for getting a lift to shows?

I bet there are more people that get lifts than give them!

Its nuts to suggest anything different (and also crazy to suggest that people buy their own transport – where would it all go when you went to a show!)

My best friends Dad drove 3 junctions down the M25 to pick me up on Sunday, waited, and took me home all for 2 tubes of Pringles and some rolling tobacco….I don’t think that is illegal do you (and it wasn’t ‘that’ type of rolling tobacco!)

People really do get OTT on here! Since when did anyone do anything by the book anyway….God!

Kelly I want to give you a hug!

BTW, on a self indulgent thing…I posted pics of Bruce in the gallery and only got 6 replies…it made me a bit sad because I was looking forward to hearing what people thought!

 

[bandit]

Hi Tia

Sticking up for a very good mate is first reason for a post - mud sticks and I wouldn't want a really lovely girl to be seen as either childish or stupid. She has stood on her own 2 feet since 16 yrs, both financially and morally...

As for not giving her the number, the lady hadn't asked for it initially, and Kelly said she was coming when the conditions improved - had she been asked for it, Kelly would have given it, that situation hadn't arisen. Kelly sadly didn't make that bit clear.

I've been on this site for i htink about 4 yrs - and have to say it is increasingly the case that people respond aggresively to others, and the once helpful nature of most has gone. there are of course exceptions, but it is a shame...

PS - any snow yet T?

Bx

 

[JACQSZOO]

[ QUOTE ]


I have only recently got a horsebox, and always try to make sure it is full up whenever we go to a show - and yes, people do pay diesel money, so whoever it was that was talking b*llocks about it being illegal etc etc, well tell them to stop being so pedantic - IT HAPPENS ALL THE TIME, and you are simply sharing the costs, its not her making money in a business way.



[/ QUOTE ]

Pedantic or not - those are the rules. Should you take any form of payment, even just to cover costs, your insurance is null and void. Whether people choose to do it or not is upto them. They certainly should not be made out to be the baddies because they decide they do not want to risk it.

 

[filly190]

I was shocked to read the posts sent to her and think its awful the way people dont think before they type. Mine was a nice one by the way

 

[Sooty]

Absolutely. Far too few people realise the implications of taking money, although there is no reason not to give a lift free of charge.

 

[Sooty]

I don't actually think I do owe Kelly an apology.

 

[JACQSZOO]

[ QUOTE ]
I don't actually think I do owe Kelly an apology.

[/ QUOTE ]

Neither do I.

 

[Agent XXX999]

AH!

Now…if you take money for transporting the horse I can see the point. However – if you load the horses ‘as a favour’ into the lorry, drive via a petrol station and put the diesel in the lorry and someone else pays for it ‘as a favour’ it doesn’t necessarily mean that you have taken payment for transporting….

There are ways and means out of most things.

 

[Abs]

I just posted my usual 'ok, let's look at why you feel like this and what we can do about it' offering. No apology needed for that!

 

[Tia]

No snow yet thank goodness. I'm expecting it within a couple of weeks though....but that will be fine as the farm will be ready for it by then.

Ye mis-understandings do occur on here from time to time, and the whole story can never be told in the first post....and often what sounds out of order in the first post becomes totally clear in the following posts. It's just the way the forum works - we aren't there so can't possibly grasp a full understanding of what is happening.

Actually it happened on a post I made in Vets yesterday. I thought I had given all the symptoms (which I had) however stupidly of me I missed out other factors which could have this condition arise. All the kindly people who answered gave good diagnoses with the information I had provided.........totally my mistake not to make them aware of ALL factors.

It happens.