Trouble with Assistance

[Bellalily]

I’ve never had this before, but by my two’s reactions to being caught and led in by me, I’m pretty sure the girl who puts them out for me is being too rushed or too rough or both. She also has a strange relationship with telling the truth or actually taking any notice of what I’ve asked her. I said at the beginning to tell me if the big chap was reluctant to leave his stable and it was only after they changed field two weeks later (bullied) that she said she’d had to drag him to the field for the last two weeks. She didn’t think to tell me at the time? Little chap who is old is definitely less confident to lead. There’s other stuff, but need to pop off to work now. I’ve let her know that I know, but what can I do?

 

[rextherobber]

Get rid of her, she lacks everything you need to help you with your horses

 

[Highmileagecob]

She has broken your trust. And once that is damaged, it's a slippery slope, as you will start to look for other signs that things are not right.

 

[Bellalily]

Thanks, I wondered whether I was overreacting, but I don’t think so.

 

[Bellalily]

Get rid of her, she lacks everything you need to help you with your horses

Unfortunately she’s the only assistance available.

 

[canteron]

In that case you have to manage her! My suggestion, a chat over coffee, start with the positives then say, I’ve been thinking, maybe we could find a way to do this better … what do you think …. and lead the conversation from there!

 

[Goldenstar]

What’s the situation is it livery or at home ?

 

[Bellalily]

I have tried to talk to her, but it’s not easy pinning her down as she’s always rushing around to the next job.

 

[Bellalily]

What’s the situation is it livery or at home ?

Livery yard.

 

[Bellalily]

In that case you have to manage her! My suggestion, a chat over coffee, start with the positives then say, I’ve been thinking, maybe we could find a way to do this better … what do you think …. and lead the conversation from there!

I have tried to talk to her, she’s quite dismissive and says everything is fine and they’re normal when she’s only known them 3 weeks!

 

[Annagain]

Why is she the only option? Is she employed by the yard and therefore you have to have her? Are you in an area where there's nobody else? I'd be looking for any way to use another person. Could you team up with other liveries for turnout / bringing in or pay one of them to do it instead?

 

[GrassChop]

3 weeks isn't that long to see if you can get her to work to your requirements. I'd try and give her another chance.

 

[Bellalily]

3 weeks isn't that long to see if you can get her to work to your requirements. I'd try and give her another chance.

It’s the blatant lies that really destroys my trust in her. Plus the wee pony who needs to be bridled for being led back and forth is now reluctant for me to bridle him and has started throwing his head around whereas before he would open his mouth without me asking and drop his head right down. The big man is definitely more wary too.

 

[GrassChop]

It’s the blatant lies that really destroys my trust in her. Plus the wee pony who needs to be bridled for being led back and forth is now reluctant for me to bridle him and has started throwing his head around whereas before he would open his mouth without me asking and drop his head right down. The big man is definitely more wary too.

Oh okay, maybe not then.

 

[Upthecreek]

Speak to the Yard Owner and explain your expectations for how your horses are handled. It’s down to them to communicate this to the staff, not you. The staff don’t know your horses like you do & they will have limited time to get everything done, so horses will be quickly turned out & fetched in so they can move onto the next task. If they are used to very slow gentle handling this may not be what they are getting, but doesn’t necessarily mean she is being rough or nasty so you need to be careful what you say if nothing untoward has been witnessed. If she is lying to you or not telling you things you’ve specifically asked to be told about, again this is something else you need to speak to the Yard Owner about.

 

[paddy555]

It’s the blatant lies that really destroys my trust in her. Plus the wee pony who needs to be bridled for being led back and forth is now reluctant for me to bridle him and has started throwing his head around whereas before he would open his mouth without me asking and drop his head right down. The big man is definitely more wary too.

camera in his box to see what is really going on. Can you link this to your phone so you can look in at putting out time and getting in time to watch it. Same in the other horse's box (or swap it over) that will give an idea as to how she handles them.

 

[Jambarissa]

I would have politely called her out on her lies when you were made aware 'you've had to drag him to the field? You did say he was OK. I really want to know about this'.

Possibly she's just saying they're OK to reassure you and does think they're generally fine, bit like when you leave your baby at nursery.

If you can speak to the yo then do so, otherwise you have no choice but to pin her down and make your expectations clear. Hopefully that solves it but if not you'd need someone else or move yards, no other options.

 

[SantaVera]

It’s the blatant lies that really destroys my trust in her. Plus the wee pony who needs to be bridled for being led back and forth is now reluctant for me to bridle him and has started throwing his head around whereas before he would open his mouth without me asking and drop his head right down. The big man is definitely more wary too.

Sounds like they've had a wallop round the head. Get rid of this girl.

 

[SantaVera]

I have tried to talk to her, but it’s not easy pinning her down as she’s always rushing around to the next job.

This says a lot, there's no place for rushing when dealing with horses

 

[Bellalily]

camera in his box to see what is really going on. Can you link this to your phone so you can look in at putting out time and getting in time to watch it. Same in the other horse's box (or swap it over) that will give an idea as to how she handles them.

I can’t stretch to that unfortunately. She only turns out. I do the bring in, which is when I noticed the change.

 

[Bellalily]

Sounds like they've had a wallop round the head. Get rid of this girl.

That’s what I’m wondering. I did see her handling her own horse the other day and it made me wonder about mine tbh. She’s bought a 6yr tb and the poor mare was up on end coming out of the school with the girl on the ground pulling really hard on her mouth.

 

[dorsetladette]

Why is she the only option? Is there not another livery you can quietly share jobs with.

She doesn't sound like a person I'd want around my horses on a regular basis.

 

[Upthecreek]

Is this person a member of staff, a freelancer or another livery you’ve made the arrangement with to turn out your horses?

 

[splashgirl45]

Could you get a freelance in to help, might cost you a bit more but worth it if they handle your horses gently

 

[Bellalily]

Why is she the only option? Is there not another livery you can quietly share jobs with.

She doesn't sound like a person I'd want around my horses on a regular basis.

There may be, but as I’m a newbie, I think everyone else is sorted. The only person who needs help probably wouldn’t be able to do mornings for me. A shame as it would have been perfect, but she has 3 young children.

 

[Bellalily]

Could you get a freelance in to help, might cost you a bit more but worth it if they handle your horses gently

That is the idea atm. The lady I’ve had in the past is completely full. I shall ask around.

 

[Bellalily]

Is this person a member of staff, a freelancer or another livery you’ve made the arrangement with to turn out your horses?

Freelancer who has her horses here too.

 

[hellfire]

So sorry to hear this. I had similar and told her I didn’t trust her and terminated our arrangement. As you say she’s the only help personally I’d sit down and have a conversation with her about your concerns and exactly what you need/expect. In the mean time look for someone else as other have suggested.

 

[Bellalily]

So sorry to hear this. I had similar and told her I didn’t trust her and terminated our arrangement. As you say she’s the only help personally I’d sit down and have a conversation with her about your concerns and exactly what you need/expect. In the mean time look for someone else as other have suggested.

She’s now being an idiot and walked straight past me last night. Quite took me by surprise actually. I am now frantically looking for another freelancer. It would only be three days a week as M and F they are generally in and the weekends I do them (mostly). I also possibly have another answer but I don’t want to jinx it.

 

[rextherobber]

She’s now being an idiot and walked straight past me last night. Quite took me by surprise actually. I am now frantically looking for another freelancer. It would only be three days a week as M and F they are generally in and the weekends I do them (mostly). I also possibly have another answer but I don’t want to jinx it.

Good luck, hope you get it sorted quickly. I'd still get rid of her, she's harming your horses. There will almost certainly be lixal freelancers, unfortunately they mostly advertise on Facebook, so you may gave to sign up to that to find them. Or ask in your local feed store?