Turned away due to my weight :(

[Bestdogdash]

Circumstances are irrelevant - only you can lose weight for yourself. That is done by eating less and moving more. I have no sympathy at all - it is in your hands you are an adult and you make your own choices. The awful thing is that you think you can inflict your choice on an animal and then bleat because you can't. Man up, lose weight and mprove your life.

 

[mulledwhine]

I thought the same, totally unnecessary

I would be biting your new instructors hand off, sounds like a great solution, plus you are learning skills which will be important when you finally own your own horse

 

[_GG_]

Thank you galaxy. That is interesting. I guess I need to make the decision between riding again and weight. The instructor said at 16 stone (I'd have to 16 including a saddle and gear) the school could offer me two horses to ride. My dream has always been a 15.2 heavyweight cob ( this is the horse I feel most comfy on) what would be an ideal weight for that? I want to do low key competitions?

Also I have not a lot of time to exercise and to be honest I don't have the motivation but horse related is fine! Any ideas for weight loss involving horses. Instructor said I could lead out ponies for hacks with small children, lunge, long line (what is this?)
She said if I am willing to help she will add up my hours and it will amount to some free lessons when I'm slimmer

This instructor sounds like someone you should be extremely greatful for meeting...she could actually save your life as I think you probably already know that you are putting your vital organs under enormous strain at your current weight. The offer to tot up your help in return for free lessons is extremely generous and I think she is pretty much doing what she can, as nicely as she can to try and support you in being able to ride again one day. She deserves a bottle of wine and a thank you card.

Go to your mirror, take a really good look at yourself and tell yourself a few things:-

"
I deserve to be happy

I deserve to be healthy

I CAN lose weight

I CAN ride again one day

I CAN do this

I CAN do this

I CAN do this

I CAN do this

"

 

[JFTDWS]

A heavyweight cob would be around the 600kgs mark I would say. So if you could be 15-20% of that it would be 90-120kgs. I'm sorry I can't convert that to stone in my head! Lol!

According to the link you posted, that's 13-14stone. I couldn't do the maths either, though.

 

[galaxy]

According to the link you posted, that's 13-14stone. I couldn't do the maths either, though.

Lol! Didn't actually read the link myself! I read it months ago. So 15%=90kgs=14stone.

 

[Shysmum]

The horse's welfare should come way above your personal feelings. Currently you are too heavy to ride pretty much anything. The horse will be at risk of back injury for a start. Horses are so faithful, they may not buck you off, but my God they will be struggling. Sometimes the truth hurts, but as I say, the horse and it's welfare MUST be the priority.

This subject has been done many times - if you do a search, you will find them. I'm sorry this is your first post, but it is a very contraversial subject on HHO.

 

[cobalobM]

the most I would put on a 15.2 heavy weight cob would be 15 stone inc. tack etc, but that would be absolute maximum and not heavy school work.jumping/long periods of riding. You said you arn't motivated to loose weight, well why not use riding as your motivation?!

I would have jumped at the chance to learn ground work, lunging etc as when I was at a riding school I was dying to do all that!! and can you offer to muck out? that is the best exercise ever!!!! if you are 100% commited to horses/riding, you wont get on a horse again until you are lighter, start helping at the stables and the weight will drop off, and you will be having fun too!

 

[Jellybabie]

Thank you everyone bar bestdogdash! I was completely un aware so I didn't think a horse could be incapable of carrying me!
To be fair I was upset but my instructor said to have a think and be at the stables at 9am tomorrow if I want to take up her offer. She was a plus sized lady herself and said she lost all the weight, she sold her horse as she was too heavy and brought a foal which she looked after alongside losing weight an 10 years later he is the most amazing horse and she rides all types of horses and ponies!
All though I don't think I should get a foal!

 

[_GG_]

She sounds like someone you should really stay close to and take advice from.

I can PM you loads of healthy recipes if you need, so just let me know. Ignore my other recent threads and posts though, they contain lots of pictures and videos of cakes and icing. Sorry!

Anyway, I do healthy food too so if you want anything, just PM me

 

[hayley.t]

Good luck and keep us posted! it sounds exciting helping out and learning new stuff that a lot of people don't really get the chance to.

 

[mulledwhine]

I hope we read tomorrow, that you turned up at 9am and had a fab day , whilst realising that being around horses means you can have fun without riding you will learn great skills, and tBH riding is a very very small part of horse ownership

I seem to spend most of my time dealing with poo and digging up ragwort

 

[mulledwhine]

She sounds like someone you should really stay close to and take advice from.

I can PM you loads of healthy recipes if you need, so just let me know. Ignore my other recent threads and posts though, they contain lots of pictures and videos of cakes and icing. Sorry!



Anyway, I do healthy food too so if you want anything, just PM me

I will have some of your recipes please

I will start them on Monday, after making cupcakes on Sunday

 

[_GG_]

I will have some of your recipes please

I will start them on Monday, after making cupcakes on Sunday

Hahaaaa, awesome. I'll do a thread over the weekend then.

 

[FlaxenPony05]

You sound like you've struck gold with your current instructor OP- now go out there and take advantage of it! OK, so you don't have a lot of time to do exercise, but as well as helping out at the yard, you also need to have a good think about your diet and your portion sizes. GG sounds like she has some good recipes so I would PM her. Good luck and keep us updated!

 

[ZondaR]

OP, most people are not motivated to exercise to loose weight but it is something that simply has got to be done, like brushing your teeth. You don't enjoy doing it, you just get on with it. You do not need to exercise every day, 4 times a week would be enough combined with a sensible diet. These are not radical lifestyle changes. There are loads of weight loss web sites full of advice, help and support, not to mention your local Weight Watchers which really does work.

 

[cobalobM]

well I really do hope you are going to be there at 9am tomorrow!! if people end up being nasty, keep your head down, get on with whatever you're doing and show them how committed you are, thats something I had to learn at the riding school!! you have just got to say to yourself, you are doing this for you and you are a much better person then they are!

 

[Jellybabie]

My husband doesn't want me to go! He said we can just get our own! I'm so confused!!!

 

[Sparkly Snowdrop]

Sorry to hear you were upset not to be able to ride, but I do think you have been given a fabulous opportunity to learn so much about horses whilst also getting the incentive and the chance to lose some weight.

Grab the chance with both hands, who knows where it might take you. Good luck and I really hope you enjoy spending time with the horses and I can't wait to hear about your andventures. That first time back in the saddle when you reach the required weight will be such an achievement, I bet you won't stop grinning.

 

[FlaxenPony05]

My husband doesn't want me to go! He said we can just get our own! I'm so confused!!!

Did he give a reason...? Surely you can decide if you go or not, it's not him that's going!

 

[Shysmum]

Hmmmmm. This is starting to sound ODD ?

 

[FlaxenPony05]

Hmmmmm. This is starting to sound ODD ?

Just what I was thinking. Hope I'm wrong though...

 

[JFTDWS]

My husband doesn't want me to go! He said we can just get our own! I'm so confused!!!

Who is the boss of you - your husband, or you? Or does he not want you to get fit and healthy?

 

[mulledwhine]

You say you are a novice , so getting given the chance to have hands in experience is vital, don't listen to your husband, you don't just simply buy a horse, ride and feed!!!!!! There is far more to it than that

 

[pippixox]

take this as a brilliant opportunity to change your life. my bf was 20 stone and is now 13, lost it 6 years ago and has never looked back. he said the first 2-3 stone were actually quite easy to loose with just being careful what he ate and exercising, so before you know it you will be light enough to ride. regardless of your weight, please don't decide getting your own horse is the right answer, you may be a novice rider but have even less experience in horse care. it sounds brilliant that you can get a chance to learn more ground work, something you miss out on when just going for a riding lesson. do leading, mucking out, lunging, long reining, ect... you will be exhausted and it's a great way to loose weight at the same time as enjoying horses and learning new things.

 

[Jellybabie]

My husband wants me to get my own horse and keep it where his sister has her horse. She can help she has been riding for 3 years and has 2 horses. I now understand about the weight but it's hard to decide what to do!

 

[starryeyed]

I think that the opportunity your new instructor is giving you is extremely generous and something a lot of people would jump at! Groundwork may not sound as interesting as riding but learning to do things like lunging/long reining properly are skills which are so useful and many people don't know how to do them the right way. Many riding schools don't even offer the opportunities to learn these things. If you're looking to purchase a horse in the future these skills will be invaluable, you will learn so much. I wouldn't rush into buying one just because the riding school turned you away.

 

[Haylee]

Easiest and cheapest is to help your instructor, your a novice so the most things you can do round the yard the better

 

[Shysmum]

Shall I start popping the corn ?

 

[Tiarella]

18 stone is too heavy for any horse in my opinion. I dont particulary think 16 stone is kind to a horse either.

 

[Sunshine]

Aww Jellybabie, I really feel for you having to confront such a sensitive issue. But the RS is taking the right approach for the welfare of their horses.

Firstly, the new instructor seems like someone who would be a real friend and teach you a lot. By going there tomorrow and taking her up on the offer to learn lots of new skills you are showing willing, proving the doubters wrong and making a start on your weight loss motivation program. Secondly, I would guess that just by being out there with this new instructor you will start to lose weight because you are more active, less focused on food and happier by being challenged. Finally you have the chance to learn a lot of basics that will be essential for any horse owner -without paying for the advice/instruction or in vet bills when something goes wrong with your own.

But, I was a little concerned with your husband's response, to me that seems like he is not helping you in the long run. Is he happy with your weight, does he prefer you to be large? Being totally honest with yourself - are you completely happy with your weight and the baggage that goes with it like clothes shopping, climbing stairs, being prevented from doing things you like? I am asking as a larger lady myself, so I know it isn't easy to confront and resigning yourself to being big is easier than dieting and exercise or the worry of what life is like if you changed.