Weird vet stories

[Elf On A Shelf]

When I read the title of Weird Vet Stories I thought you meant what weird things vets have done of which I do have one!

Vet came out to microchip the foal. A wee 3 month old shetland Filly foal so granted not big. So she grabs the chip, the gun, a tub of hibiscrub swabs and a scalpel. The hibiscrub swabs I didn't question but thought it was a but weird bringing a scalpel but hey ho!

Vet proceeds to pat said pony, scan the chip in its case to make sure it can be read. She puts the chip in the gun, puts one hand behind the ponies neck to hold it steady and clicks the gun.

This is where I discover where the scalpel comes in! The chip had gone in one side of the ponies neck and out the other into the vets finger. So she gets the scalpel out, digs the chip out of her finger, cleans it with hibiscrub and puts it back in the gun for round 2.

Round 2 also goes into her finger... so out comes the scalpel and hibiscrub again.

3rd time lucky the microchip stayed in the pony!

 

[Pinkvboots]

Louis got choke once and it just wouldn't clear so vet came out it was about 7pm,
He had to tube him and his not the most co operative patient and because of all the fidgeting he got the worst nose bleed, the amount if blood was horrendous and because he kept moving his head we were covered in it, we looked like we had committed murder I've never seen so much blood.

I also had changed his bed that day from straw to shavings so his lovely white bed was red.

My poor vet had to use our bathroom and try and clean himself up before getting in the car, his nice what was a clean shirt was chucked in the bin so embarrassing.

 

[Chianti]

An owner could entertain the vet with the tale of how her new sharer had used her horse as cover for an affair. Horse was ridden a few times (never paid any money!) and then never heard from again - presumably to make it sound realistic when hubby asked her how ride had been that day.

 

[hairycob]

Mine spooked out on a hack and ended up upright in a very deep ditch full of brambles that tangled up in his feathers, mane & tail so he couldn't get out. Firemen had to come and get him out but luckily they didn't need to sedate him as that would have meant lifting him out and he was directly under the power cables to a farm. Luckily all good but had to be sedated back at the yard for the vet to remove thorns from his willy.

 

[Parrotperson]

I’m ne vet I know was getting married. They decided bride would ride to church

Yeh. The inevitable happened. The horse spooked the bride fell off in a puddle and all before she got anywhere near the church.

 

[SEL]

On the not so great (or funny) stories....

I found a horse in a field with a leg wobbling where it shouldn't have been . It was horrendous getting her back to the yard on 3 legs but she wouldn't load into a trailer and was owned by a very, very difficult lady. So we get her back, pop her in a large stable with an enormous bed and a huge net of hay and the usual vet practice turn up having spoken to the owner themselves. Owner (who isn't in country) has decided the horse has not broken her leg so vets are not equiped with x ray machine or anything useful and definitely not able to PTS. Mare is not weight bearing. Vets promise to come out the following day with their mobile x ray machine.

In the meantime owner has phoned a different practice so the following morning the local farm vet turns up. I'm expecting a quick decision here but they also haven't got a mobile x ray machine and don't really know what they are there for. Asks me if I can trot the horse up and I tell them not to be so ****** stupid (is that dummies guide to horse lameness?) because the mare isn't weight bearing on it and if you manipulate the hoof it is flexing around the fetlock in a way no hoof should. Farm vet tells me he isn't sure why he has been called out - nor am I.

Equine vets turn up, x ray and confirm broken. Owner is shouting down the phone (YO had it on loud speaker) at poor vets who are trying to tell her it looks like the mare got her leg in a hole of some sort but it is absolutely definitely broken. Well fix it then.

They did try to fix it.... she came home for a week in plaster during which time the dentist turned up. He was a bit surprised to be told his client was a horse with a broken leg and politely told the owner that he really didn't think a rasp and file was appropriate right then. I think he got shouted at too.

Gangrene sadly within the week.

What was really odd was I never got the impression all the shouting was because she was sad at the loss of her horse (she rarely saw her) but more because the professionals were 'pushing back' and telling her what she didn't want to hear.

 

[Titchy Pony]

I hate those 'horse friendly' gates because I can all too easily visualise that exact thing happening. They are even dodgier when they are self-closing and snap shut as soon as you let them go. I always get off if I have to use one.

Keep the stories coming, guys! These are amazing.

What happened to the horse who fell into the swimming pool? Did they get it out in once piece?

Different horse in pool story. It was a Shetland pony that fell into a neighbours pool. Someone turned up at our door asking if we had a brown pony, yes I had a 14.2 bay but had just fed him and knew he wasn't missing. We went down to see if we recognised the pony. Vet and firebrigade were there and the poor little thing was balancing on his back legs to keep his head out of the water. They emptied the pool and made a stairs of straw bales for him to climb out on his own. He was fine if a bit shaky.

 

[Elf On A Shelf]

When I rang the vet for Gray I told him he had a broken jaw. This was at 6.20am. The vet finally appeared at 8.30am. I met him at his truck and told him that he would need a hefty dose of sedation and probably more painkillers. He looked at me scepticaly but did draw up some sedation. He brought the phynadine with him in the bottle.

Gave Gray some drugs and he went to poke and prod at Gray's mouth. I said to wait until the sedation had kicked in. So whilst that was working its magic the vet started assessing the other wounds. "I'll go get some cleaning and bandaging stuff for the front leg, it's a hell of a mess. Do you have a bucket for warm water?" His face was a little more than shocked when I said "forget about the leg for now, we need to know what's going on with the jaw because if I can't fix that there's no point in trying to fix the leg." His face went from shocked to saddened when he started poking at the wound on Gray's jaw and he started pulling shards of bone out through it. Yeah. There was no point in patching up the degloved leg.

He asked me where I worked and when I responded with the racing yard he understood why my practical side comes through first and foremost in situations like that and why I told him to bring drugs.

 

[hock]

Maybe there's an owner who invents some problems just to spend time with their vet, I think there's been some threads on here to inspire that

Equine munchausen by proxy! Yer I’d buy that!

 

[Pinkvboots]

When I rang the vet for Gray I told him he had a broken jaw. This was at 6.20am. The vet finally appeared at 8.30am. I met him at his truck and told him that he would need a hefty dose of sedation and probably more painkillers. He looked at me scepticaly but did draw up some sedation. He brought the phynadine with him in the bottle.

Gave Gray some drugs and he went to poke and prod at Gray's mouth. I said to wait until the sedation had kicked in. So whilst that was working its magic the vet started assessing the other wounds. "I'll go get some cleaning and bandaging stuff for the front leg, it's a hell of a mess. Do you have a bucket for warm water?" His face was a little more than shocked when I said "forget about the leg for now, we need to know what's going on with the jaw because if I can't fix that there's no point in trying to fix the leg." His face went from shocked to saddened when he started poking at the wound on Gray's jaw and he started pulling shards of bone out through it. Yeah. There was no point in patching up the degloved leg.

He asked me where I worked and when I responded with the racing yard he understood why my practical side comes through first and foremost in situations like that and why I told him to bring drugs.

I'm sorry I accidentally pressed on the laugh emoji instead of the sad one.

 

[Elf On A Shelf]

I'm sorry I accidentally pressed on the laugh emoji instead of the sad one.

It's OK, we've all done it x

 

[Errin Paddywack]

My friend had a vet (Irish) come to vaccinate her horse. While vaccinating a horse for his previous client he had managed to stick the needle in his finger. He kept on and on about his finger and how worried he was about it. He came to us next and we had the same story told us, it was obviously worrying him a lot. Some time later I was talking to someone at the RC and they told me about this Irish vet that had come out to their horse and how all he could go on about was his finger. We all had a good laugh about him. His finger obviously survived as he came to us again.

 

[SEL]

One of the donkeys next door to me is called Jesus (surprise birth on Good Friday - although I think more colourful words were used at the time). Apparently when he was castrated there was a bit too much sedation and the farm vet was worried he wasn't coming round

Owner relieved a while later to hear "Jesus has risen"

 

[Slightlyconfused]

I am working on my third novel, and I've pivoted away from the crime/police procedural stuff of the last two.

This one is about a hapless equine vet. What I'm after is inspiration -- any stories of bizarre scrapes horses have got themselves into that required veterinary intervention, something to spice up my vet's life between the all mystery lamenesses, colics, and minor injuries.

I've got some from 30 years of horses, but there have got to be better ones.

Had a tb that hit himself in his face with his hoof as he was aiming at his treat ball but missed.....a nail was slightly raised and made a lovely ragged cut in his cheek that needed antibiotics.


And another who got a black berry thorn in his nose and it healed over and then blew large amount of infection out a few weeks later leaving a crater in the middle of his nose

 

[Lois Lame]

A horse I loaned had one eye. The story was they had just put a horse down on the yard...

This reminded me of an episode of The People's Court that I saw the other day on youtube.

I hesitate to post the link, but I will. It's a sad case. I feel so sad for all involved, but I have to say that the defendant is wrong about horses avoiding holes (that they don't know are even there!) in their paddock. Anyhow, here's the link.

 

[Lois Lame]

I’ve seen a pony with ‘bloody diarrhoea’ which turned out to be too many blackberries!

And, although there was an actual issue, a foot abscess which miraculously cured itself when the vet arrived… horse lashed out with a front leg, vet dodged, hoof hit concrete wall and pus exploded out the sole.

I love these ones.

 

[Lois Lame]

We once broke the vet He arrived to remove two or three stitches from pony's stifle following some keyhole surgery. Pony twitched a tiny bit, nervous vet dropped the scalpel he had ready to cut the stitches and sliced open his own hand right down the side of his thumb. Bone was clearly visible in the gap that opened up! We patched him up with some Animalintex and Vetwrap. He phoned a colleague to ask if staples would work and she said that horse staples are too large for humans (Yikes - someone had obviously tried this already!). We sent our hapless vet off the A&E where they closed the wound with 10 stitches.
We had to phone the practice office and ask for another vet as we had broken the first one! I later heard that the vet made a full recovery and went to Australia for the (horse) breeding season.

 

[Lois Lame]

My dear old cob died in his 30s a few years ago - he simply laid down in the field one morning and was clearly not going to get up again. My lovely YO called me and the vet and by coincidence we both arrived about 20 minutes later. My lovely old horse looked me straight in the eye and breathed his last - I am absolutely sure he waited for me to be there. The poor vet could only tell us what was extremely obvious - that he had just passed away. I think she was a bit mortified that she couldn't do more. We did laugh about it later once we all had a good cry.

 

[ponynutz]

Vet didn't come out but you could tweak it slightly or this one:
Pony ate half a sausage roll
A week later she ate a whole packet of Strepsils (packaging and all)
*cue panic and a night spent checking she wasn't colicing*

Same pony also stuck her head in a bush and gave herself a nasty eye ulcer.

 

[Sleipnir]

When I had to get a vet out to do scans on a mares' injured leg, the only vet available with the machine was infamous for always cancelling visits at the very last moment.

Of course, he cancelled on me too - twice. He was always apologetic and it was always due to an emergency. We schedule for the third time. I've arrived on the yard, mare is groomed and ready for the scans, but the scheduled hour comes and passes... Suddenly, I get a call from the vet. In a very timid voice, he says:

- I'm extremely sorry, but I won't be able to arrive today. You see, I've become blind...

Turns out, he had gone for an eye/vision check earlier that day and got administered those drops that relax your eyeball and make your vision extremely blurry - obviously, he wasn't able to drive in that state.

Fourth time rescheduling the visit did the charm and he even gave me a discount for my troubles.

 

[ycbm]

I'm sorry I accidentally pressed on the laugh emoji instead of the sad one.

I can change my like, or remove it, even years later, so I think you should be able to?

 

[Pinkvboots]

I can change my like, or remove it, even years later, so I think you should be able to?

I did change it but I wanted to say just incase it was seen

 

[ycbm]

I have another cow one, CI, but you can possibly adapt it. Friends had the emergency night vet out for a calving cow. He turned up in full DJ attire for a black tie do he was on his way to. OK he had full waterproofs, but calving a cow in full waterproofs in summer leaves everything inside it very damp and bedraggled

.

 

[Katieg123]

Not an equine vet story but still cracks me up! This was when I was doing work placement in a small animal clinic.

Man comes in with his dog saying its belly is covered in warts and doesn't know what to do. We have a look - see nothing and ask him to point them out. We then have to explain that his dog does in fact, have nipples. He's shocked explaining that his dog is a male. Then we have to ask him if he has nipples? Lots of blushing and apologies!

Another elderly gentleman came in because at feeding time his dog spins in circles with excitement. He was worried because the dog always spins in just the one direction and never the other! We said its ok and not to worry.

Love the easy and fun ones!

 

[Indy]

I have a lovely Irish vet who I have used for nearly 30 years so we know each other very well. One of my horse had colic a very long time ago and she needed tubing which she wasn't being very cooperative about. So after what felt like hours of trying to get her to take the tube my vet just very exasperated shouted 'Just swallow will you'

I replied 'We haven't even bee on a first date yet'

We looked at each other, laughed and she swallowed!

 

[SpeedyPony]

The little pony mare needed one of her hinds looking at by the vet- she was also in season at the time and weed on him as he picked up her foot
He took it in his stride though, I imagine it's something of an occupational hazard!

 

[DressageCob]

My horse was being investigated for stifle issues. He just looked a little off. The vet asked me to lunge him. Bear in mind he's supposed to be poorly (and was in fact so injured, it transpired, that I had to have him PTS), and he's a one-eyed schoolmaster cob, as I lunged him in trot, he barged off the circle and went legging it out of the arena. I had come from work and was wearing a suit, loafers and trousers which, it turns out, were actually a little on the large side. So there's my cob flying around the arena, now at a canter, me hanging onto the lunge line with my right hand (having dropped the lunge whip, whacking myself in the eye as I did so), and my left hand was desperately clinging onto my trousers which were making their own bid for freedom. I eventually had to let go, one of the yard girls got some feed and my safe as houses little tank of a cob went and had a snack while I pulled my trousers and my dignity up off the floor.

Same horse melted his eyeball so that it had the consistency of a partially-cooked egg white. That was eye opening

 

[Lois Lame]

I have a lovely Irish vet who I have used for nearly 30 years so we know each other very well. One of my horse had colic a very long time ago and she needed tubing which she wasn't being very cooperative about. So after what felt like hours of trying to get her to take the tube my vet just very exasperated shouted 'Just swallow will you'

I replied 'We haven't even bee on a first date yet'

We looked at each other, laughed and she swallowed!

Oh... I say some cheeky things to people but I wouldn't have been game to say that.

 

[thefarsideofthefield]

Our local vet got called out by Mrs B , an elderly lady who has a small holding which is home to an assortment of animals . The message he got was " Please can t' veterinary come an 'ave a look at t' sheep because it's lookin ' a bit green " .
The vet arrived and was greeted at the gate with a " 'Ow do , veterinary . " by the elderly lady .
" Well now , Mrs B " he said " Where's this sick sheep of yours ? "
" T'isn't sick " she replied firmly .
" Well what appears to be the problem then ? " he asked , puzzled .
" A' told thee , veterinary " she said curtly " Tha' sheep's lookin' green . "
" Ah well , okay , let's just go and have a look at it anyway shall we ? " he suggested .
Mrs B slowly limped over to a nearby paddock and waved her arm at it's occupants , a brown donkey , a grey goat and a sheep which was , indeed , a glorious shade of emerald green .
What was this ? Some sort of vandalism ? A practical joke ?
The mystery was solved when the vet took a closer look at the sheep . It turned out that it liked to stand underneath the donkey's hay net whilst he was eating it , and scavenge any bits that fell to the floor . As a consequence his fleece was full of grass seed and after a few days of rain followed by a sunny spell , the seeds had germinated and.he had sprouted his own carpet of grass .
" He's fine " the vet told a relieved Mrs B . " He just needs mowing . "

 

[Cowpony]

Sorry, was trying to quote the post about the donkey called Jesus who rose, but I clearly quoted the wrong post!

Should have been called Lazarus