What is a 'Toff'?

Do You think Speeding is acceptable?


  • Total voters
    0

MizElz

Well-Known Member
Joined
14 July 2007
Messages
6,295
Visit site
My uni friend came over the other day to 'experience Wiltshire'. Now, our upbringings could not be more different - she lives - and has always lived - in a council flat in the middle of a big city. She's never had a pet, never been on holiday, and is an only child. I thought I would take her to all the places I have grown up loving, but was bitterly disappointed by her reaction. When we visited what i consider to be one of the nicest, most quintesentially english towns I know, she refused to go in any of the sweet little boutique shops, as 'they're for toffs'. She wouldn't go in the little Monsoon or the Dorothy Perkins branches they have there, as 'it's a different market here - they won't have anything for me.' And when we went for lunch in a cute little tea shop I have been to since i was knee-high, she just ripped apart the menu, was rude to the Polish waitress, demanding to know where she was from, made disgruntled noises all through lunch and then left most of it.
frown.gif
i was so upset, I thought she would love it, but it was clear she's not at all comfortable in the city. Having not eaten her lunch, she then wanted fish and chips! So we bought some, and I took her to Barbury Castle. But she was more intent on not standing in sheep poo than she was looking at the castle and the beautiful view! Then, when I showed her my house, she hated my two dogs! and wasn't particularly keen on the horse, either, though she swooned over the cat.

Now, I know that in having animals/horses/wide open spaces I am privileged, but I've never considered myself a 'toff'. My friend, it seems, would see it differently.

Please don't laugh at the categories; during our long journeys to and from uni on the train, my friend has expressed her opinion that ALL of the below factors make you a toff!!!
 

trundle

Well-Known Member
Joined
30 April 2007
Messages
2,297
Location
Beds / Bucks borders
Visit site
I don't know about toffs, but she sounds small-minded, ignorant and utterly ghastly. Dorothy Perkins sells the same stuff all over the country, whether in Brixton or Burnham Market ! I appreciate she is your friend, but she doesn't seem to have very good manners, regardless of her upbringing.

PS. Several of those categories describe me (NOT the James Blunt one) but I am about as far from being a toff as you can get.
 

MizElz

Well-Known Member
Joined
14 July 2007
Messages
6,295
Visit site
LOL

yes, she is my friend but even i was cringing!!!! sometimes i cant believe what she comes out with! and she blames it on being on Prozac!!!!!
blush.gif


*gasps* what is wrong with loving...er...I mean, immensely liking... James Blunt????
 

SpottedCat

Well-Known Member
Joined
18 May 2007
Messages
11,668
Visit site
Ok, in the interests of science, I'll give you my answers, then give you my background....

Living in a village/ on a farm / isolated in the country - Not now, did grow up in a village though
Owning a 4x4 - No
Owning a horse - Yes
Owning several horses - In the past, now just one
Going/having been to Pony Club - No
Wearing tweed - No
Having a shooting stick and a flat cap - No
Owning a Labrador (or two, or three...) - No
Preferring boutiques to large chain retailers - Yes
Speaking Received Pronunciation - No
Liking James Blunt - Yes
Holding shooting parties - No
Being a Hunt supporter - Yes
Having seen a member of the Royal Family in the flesh - Yes
Speaking very loudly into your mobile phone whilst on the train - Well I make and receive work calls, so yes I suppose
Saying 'Darling' in every other sentence - No
Owning not just a 4x4, but a Range Rover... No
Attending/having attended Private School - No
Going to Oxford/Cambridge - No
Having a double barrelled name - Not yet...

That gives me 8/20, so 40% toff.

Not bad - I am the product of a single parent family, borderline working class, possibly lower middle class, first person in my family ever to go to university. I certainly am not 'old money', and don't have a cut glass accent...
grin.gif


(BTW all done in jest people!)
 

kick_On

Well-Known Member
Joined
7 February 2006
Messages
5,770
Location
muddy bit!!!
Visit site
not your friend as she sounds just plain RUDE to your kindness at weekend, sorry, but there again she could be a 'toff' herself as dictionary has two meaning

1 - well dressed or upper class person

2 - nickname for commoner at Oxford Uni

really just think she's a city girl and nothing to do with class! and may be out of her comfort zone??
 

TGM

Well-Known Member
Joined
3 April 2003
Messages
16,527
Location
South East
Visit site
Whilst it was rude of your friend to behave as she did, do you think she might feel uncomfortable and rather envious of the way you live, which is why she reacted like that
crazy.gif
.
 

Dotilas

Well-Known Member
Joined
19 April 2006
Messages
2,924
Location
Hants/Berks border
Visit site
I live in the country, and couldn't be further from a toff!
Have a 4x4 to tow with
smile.gif

Horse - now that's questionable
tongue.gif

Why not have several horses? As long as you give them time - no problem.
Some people in PC are toffy, but that's their upbringing.
Tweed: Surely burberry is tweed? CHAVS!
A shooting stick and flat cap, is traditional
tongue.gif

Labradors are awesome!
Toffs prefer well known designer to little boutiques :p
You won't get very far if you don't talk correctly.
There's nothing wrong with James Blunt!
Shooting is quite toffy, but there's a council estate in our tiny village, and most of them go shooting - traditional.
Being a Hunt supporter is common nowadays.
I was in London and saw the Queen, out of coincedence.
Speaking very loudly into your mobile phone whilst on the train is VERY annoying
Saying 'Darling' in every other sentence... Is toffy, sorry!
Range rovers are better 4x4s, can tow more!
Private school can create some toffs, but never label
tongue.gif

Going to Oxford/Cambridge means you're clever!
A double-barrelled name is not toffy! I have one because my parents divorced, leaving me Borsberry-Woods, but it's catchy
tongue.gif
 

Weezy

Well-Known Member
Joined
6 November 2003
Messages
39,872
Location
The Sodden Cotswolds
Visit site
Living in a village/ on a farm / isolated in the country - yes
Owning a 4x4 - Yes
Owning a horse - Yes
Owning several horses - Yes
Going/having been to Pony Club - Yes
Wearing tweed - Yes
Having a shooting stick and a flat cap - Yes
Owning a Labrador (or two, or three...) - No - do Springers count
tongue.gif

Preferring boutiques to large chain retailers - Yes
Speaking Received Pronunciation - I actually have no idea what that means!
Liking James Blunt - Yes
Holding shooting parties - No - but my father used to own a shoot
Being a Hunt supporter - Yes
Having seen a member of the Royal Family in the flesh - Yes
Speaking very loudly into your mobile phone whilst on the train - No
Saying 'Darling' in every other sentence - Hmmm prob yes
Owning not just a 4x4, but a Range Rover... yes
Attending/having attended Private School - Yes
Going to Oxford/Cambridge - No
Having a double barrelled name - No - by choice

14 Ayes from me - does that make me a toff - how utterly scrummy
tongue.gif
wink.gif
grin.gif
 

SpottedCat

Well-Known Member
Joined
18 May 2007
Messages
11,668
Visit site
[ QUOTE ]


14 Ayes from me - does that make me a toff - how utterly scrummy
tongue.gif
wink.gif
grin.gif


[/ QUOTE ]

I think you'll find you mean how utterly scrummy darling
tongue.gif
grin.gif
 

reynold

Well-Known Member
Joined
8 August 2007
Messages
2,282
Visit site
I think this shows why hunting has been 'banned' when the part of the population with no experience and no real interest in the countryside have a view like this.

only one I think makes people a toff is holding shooting parties as I know of many hunts that have non-posh subscribers but very few shoots where a 'gun' can be afforded by a normal person - let alone being the host of the party. Now being a beater is different but that wasn't the question.
 

M_G

Well-Known Member
Joined
25 November 2002
Messages
4,472
Location
Nr Peterborough
Visit site
Owning a 4x4 - No
Owning a horse - Yes
Owning several horses - No
Going/having been to Pony Club - No
Wearing tweed - No
Having a shooting stick and a flat cap - No
Owning a Labrador (or two, or three...) - No
Preferring boutiques to large chain retailers - Yes
Speaking Received Pronunciation - No
Liking James Blunt - Yes
Holding shooting parties - No
Being a Hunt supporter - Yes
Having seen a member of the Royal Family in the flesh - Yes
Speaking very loudly into your mobile phone whilst on the train - I dont use trains Ewww
Saying 'Darling' in every other sentence - No
Owning not just a 4x4, but a Range Rover... No
Attending/having attended Private School - No
Going to Oxford/Cambridge - No
Having a double barrelled name - No

So am I a toff
laugh.gif
 

Merlotmonster

Well-Known Member
Joined
31 May 2007
Messages
1,448
Location
Rusper, Sussex
Visit site
Made me laugh! definately the shooting party one.
I think your "friend" is just jealous of you...one to ditch Im afraid. How could she be so rude when all you are trying to do was entertain her.
 

MizElz

Well-Known Member
Joined
14 July 2007
Messages
6,295
Visit site
Just for the record, I agree with everyone here!
laugh.gif
and yes, i think she may have been a little out of her depth - but she did say she could never live in the country and abandon 'the bright lights.'
crazy.gif


Anyway, i'm going to see whether I'm a toff:

Living in a village/ on a farm / isolated in the country: Yup - all my life

Owning a 4x4: Yup - we have two!

Owning a horse: Yes

Owning several horses: Used to have 5

Going/having been to Pony Club: Oh yes

Wearing tweed: Er...no

Having a shooting stick and a flat cap: Nope

Owning a Labrador (or two, or three...): Yep! Have two!

Preferring boutiques to large chain retailers: Most definitely

Speaking Received Pronunciation: Yes, though I actually speak modified RP

Liking James Blunt: OMG yes

Holding shooting parties: Nope

Being a Hunt supporter: Yep

Having seen a member of the Royal Family in the flesh: Yes frequently

Speaking very loudly into your mobile phone whilst on the train: Try not to...but it happens

Saying 'Darling' in every other sentence: Definitely not, hate the word!

Owning not just a 4x4, but a Range Rover... Unfortunately, no

Attending/having attended Private School: Nope

Going to Oxford/Cambridge: Offered a place, but turned it down

Having a double barrelled name: No!


ok.....13/20 = 65% TOFF!!!!!!!!

grin.gif
grin.gif
grin.gif
 

Lord_Horatio_Nelson

Well-Known Member
Joined
20 August 2006
Messages
2,135
Location
Anglia
Visit site
[ QUOTE ]
I don't know about toffs, but she sounds small-minded, ignorant and utterly ghastly. Dorothy Perkins sells the same stuff all over the country, whether in Brixton or Burnham Market ! I appreciate she is your friend, but she doesn't seem to have very good manners, regardless of her upbringing.

PS. Several of those categories describe me (NOT the James Blunt one) but I am about as far from being a toff as you can get.

[/ QUOTE ]

Dorothy Perkins in Burnham Market...pah!! One wouldn't have such an establishment.
 

kick_On

Well-Known Member
Joined
7 February 2006
Messages
5,770
Location
muddy bit!!!
Visit site
Anyway, here's my answers

Living in a village/ on a farm / isolated in the country: yes
Owning a 4x4: Yup - yes
Owning a horse: Yes
Owning several horses: yes
Going/having been to Pony Club: Oh yes
Wearing tweed: Not now!
grin.gif
but can do
grin.gif

Having a shooting stick and a flat cap: does hunting stick count
grin.gif

Owning a Labrador (or two, or three...): sadly no,
Preferring boutiques to large chain retailers: yes
Speaking Received Pronunciation: yes
Liking James Blunt: yes
Holding shooting parties: nar
Being a Hunt supporter: defo
Having seen a member of the Royal Family in the flesh: Of course
Speaking very loudly into your mobile phone whilst on the train: doesn't everyone?
Saying 'Darling' in every other sentence: Definitely not, it's darl-ling!
Owning not just a 4x4, but a Range Rover... Unfortunately, no but got lots of friends that do
grin.gif

Attending/having attended Private School: No
Going to Oxford/Cambridge: to thick
grin.gif

Having a double barrelled name: of course, it's fab cos it never fits into forms and everyone can't spell it or pronouce it BRILLIANT!

but i consider myself as 'a normal english person' who happens to live in countryside, so you decide where to pigeon hole me, cos i can't be bother!
 

Tinypony

Well-Known Member
Joined
31 December 2006
Messages
5,211
Visit site
I think your friend is narrow-minded and rude. What a disgraceful way to behave when you had taken so much trouble to arrange nice things for her to see and do. Does this make you wonder how much of a friend she really is?
(Typed from an ex-council house in the middle of a rough council estate in a dismal part of Kent!).
 

RunToEarth

Well-Known Member
Joined
30 November 2005
Messages
18,549
Location
Lincs
Visit site
A toff is a state of mind, and you will find that the upper class of this country are usually skint, asset rich and cash poor, and the middle classes who so very much want to be 'toffs' are just that- wannabes
 

Halfstep

Well-Known Member
Joined
4 July 2005
Messages
6,966
Location
Oxfordshire
Visit site
Living in a village/ on a farm / isolated in the country - NO
Owning a 4x4 - NO
Owning a horse - YES
Owning several horses - Not at the moment!
Going/having been to Pony Club - YES
Wearing tweed - have been known to!
Having a shooting stick and a flat cap - NO
Owning a Labrador (or two, or three...) - NO
Preferring boutiques to large chain retailers - YES!!!
Speaking Received Pronunciation - Perhaps LOL
Liking James Blunt - YUCK
Holding shooting parties - NO
Being a Hunt supporter - YES
Having seen a member of the Royal Family in the flesh - YES
Speaking very loudly into your mobile phone whilst on the train - NO WAY, so RUDE
Saying 'Darling' in every other sentence NO
Owning not just a 4x4, but a Range Rover... NO, but used to
Attending/having attended Private School YES
Going to Oxford/Cambridge YES
Having a double barrelled name YES (but don't use it)

Does that make me a toff???? But I grew up in Ireland, I can't be a toff......

Its all bollox. Your friend was out of her comfort zone and didn't know how to act. It has nothing to do with "class".
confused.gif
 

Tinkerbee

Well-Known Member
Joined
19 February 2006
Messages
27,755
Location
NI
Visit site
None of those...

Got called a Toff when I moved here, which is bollocks

A toff is IMO someone from the Upper Class... of which Im not

I have done/do most things on that list, as do most people I know...but none of those make you a toff...
 

Christmas_Kate

Well-Known Member
Joined
5 December 2005
Messages
12,933
Visit site
When someone says Toff, Tim Nice But Dim springs to mind lol.

Seriously though, I think the odd Toff still exists, but theyre few and far between.
 

The Virgin Dubble

Well-Known Member
Joined
19 March 2003
Messages
14,017
Location
On my sofa
Visit site
[ QUOTE ]
A toff is a state of mind, and you will find that the upper class of this country are usually skint, asset rich and cash poor, and the middle classes who so very much want to be 'toffs' are just that- wannabes

[/ QUOTE ]
Agree.
smile.gif

Those questions could be answered in the affirmative by most people nowadays.
True toffs are more often than not, country estate landowners with tenants and staff, but hardly a penny to their name.

And they would never describe themselves as toffs - unlike the wannabe social climbers...
smirk.gif
 

Christmas_Kate

Well-Known Member
Joined
5 December 2005
Messages
12,933
Visit site
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
A toff is a state of mind, and you will find that the upper class of this country are usually skint, asset rich and cash poor, and the middle classes who so very much want to be 'toffs' are just that- wannabes

[/ QUOTE ]
Agree.
smile.gif

Those questions could be answered in the affirmative by most people nowadays.
True toffs are more often than not, country estate landowners with tenants and staff, but hardly a penny to their name.

And they would never describe themselves as toffs - unlike the wannabe social climbers...
smirk.gif


[/ QUOTE ]

Baa.
 

MizElz

Well-Known Member
Joined
14 July 2007
Messages
6,295
Visit site
[ QUOTE ]
Does the fact that she lives in a council flat, as opposed to any other sort of inner city property, have any bearing on this story?

[/ QUOTE ]

i dont think so, Sooty.....would you have preferred me to leave out the 'council' bit? Does this offend you in any way? I can't see how living in council accommodation would have a different bearing on how someone views the countryside.....

Or has it simply got to the point where mentioning 'council flat/house' is unPC?
crazy.gif
god forbid i had mentioned in the OP the fact that said friend is of Afro Caribbean descent.....
 
Top