What would you do?

Nasicus

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I hate sharing a school with others. Really hate it. Because I'm lacking confidence and constantly worried I'm getting in their way, annoying them by being there etc etc. So, what I did was wait till the school was empty, I'd always avoid peak times, and if I did have a lesson I would book a timeslot out far in advance. because it was 100% my problem and noone elses!
 

MyBoyChe

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I think you just need to get on in there and if she doesnt like it,she can always leave. It really is her issues causing the problem, not yours and in all fairness, she cant expect everyone else to work around her. Unless the YO is going to stipulate rules, then its a bit of a free for all and if everyone else is happy to share, she will have to go along with the majority or pick a quieter time to ride
 

vhf

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I think if you make it clear you're all prepared to compromise to support her, and make sure the YO knows, then she might see how unreasonable she is being if she can't compromise herself so you all get best use from the arena. There is no good reason why her needs should outrank anyone else's however much you understand how she feels. As Nasicus says, there are ways to ensure you're on your own if you really can't face sharing; her issues should not be your problem.
 

dogatemysalad

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There are many people who are nervous about sharing and I'm generally sympathetic to that, because if it's possible, I'd rather they enjoyed riding instead of giving up and leaving the horse to get fat in the field. Not everyone is blessed with unlimited confidence or a 100% horse.
However, there needs to be give and take. Hogging the school at the most popular time is not on. Sometimes, the person with the issue, needs to try and find a quieter time or pre arrange the occasional slot.
 

Bellaboo18

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We had this problem
A rule had to be made of no sole use a peak times....for us that was 5pm to 7pm.
I think this is a great idea. Get a diary for booking the school but have some firm rules. No sole use in peak times, 45 minutes max a day etc.
Sorry but I do feel a bit sorry for the lady, *sometimes* I like the school to myself while having a lesson.
 

spoo

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We have someone like this at our yard. I never understand why people who do not work or are retired insist on riding at the same times as everyone who works/ finishes school. I know I would much rather ride in the quieter periods if I had the choice! Just because they are nervous to ride and handle their horse, doesn’t mean we all are so therefore they should be the ones working around us. We all pay the same rent for the same facilities so to expect special treatment when the rest of us are more than happy to share is crazy.
 

Pearlsasinger

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Why don't you use the ex-livery-teacher to introduce you into the school as a structured lesson for the other livery? Arrange it beforehand, and she'll have to go along with it.

That is exactly what I was going to suggest. The rider will feel more confident about sharing if there is someone there to support her.
 

Bea_millard

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Why don't you all agree that she can have a solo slot 1or 2 days a week in the evenings on a specified day, buttge rest of the time is a free for all
Unfortunately she isn’t consistent with when she rides. One week she won’t ride at all, and then this week she rode yesterday and wants to ride tomorrow and Thursday. Whereas the rest of us are more consistent with when we ride and have set days or a routine
 

Crazy_cat_lady

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Probably good I mainly hack as I'd be inclined where possible to try and go in before she does then she can either join you or wait til you're done unless she has a booked lesson in which case it's a bit different especially if yo wont help.
Even if it meant I ride first then do my chores.
If I was having a paid lesson I'd want sole use of the school but it sounds like hers are on a mates basis in which case I'd expect to share
 
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amymay

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Unfortunately she isn’t consistent with when she rides. One week she won’t ride at all, and then this week she rode yesterday and wants to ride tomorrow and Thursday. Whereas the rest of us are more consistent with when we ride and have set days or a routine
Even more reason to just crack on with riding when you want to. She’ll just have to suck it up.
 

EllenJay

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Unfortunately she isn’t consistent with when she rides. One week she won’t ride at all, and then this week she rode yesterday and wants to ride tomorrow and Thursday. Whereas the rest of us are more consistent with when we ride and have set days or a routine
Yes - but if you allocate her say Monday and Wednesday as her solo slots, then she has to work around those days. It sounds like you are all scared of her. How do you know she is definitely going to ride tomorrow and Thursday, and if it's because she has told you then you just need to say "that's OK, but are you aware that Jane is riding on Wednesday - you will have to share"

I think I am having trouble understanding the problem here. You don't have a booking system, so it's a free all but you all allow her to dictate when she wants to ride. There is a difference from being supportive and allowing her to dictate to the rest of you.

What does she do if you go into the school when she is there?
 

silv

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She is being totally unreasonable and is fortunate that you have put up with this selfish behavior for so long. I would just go in and if she says anything say you will try to keep away from her but its the only convenient time for you to ride. If she wants exclusive use she should be contacting you and fitting around the other liveries.
 

Cinnamontoast

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Don’t ask to join. Just go in.
Exactly. We never had to ask, it was just a question of shouting ‘Coming in’ as we opened the gate.

Why don't you all agree that she can have a solo slot 1or 2 days a week in the evenings on a specified day, buttge rest of the time is a free for all
But why should she get sole use and therefore dictate to others when they can ride? If they’re wanting to ride on one of her days, they can’t if they follow the idea that she has sole use on certain days. That’s pretty outrageous.

Get the yo to say that there is no sole use for definite and crack on.
 

Lexi_

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Unfortunately she doesn’t hack at all. I understand her being nervous and that’s why I feel that I could be coming across as rude. But like someone said before, if the rest of us are all okay with sharing then it’s her problem not ours and we shouldn’t be made to change our plans/not ride because of it. It also bugs me that she’s an instructor and will watch me riding when I’m in the school and try and give me a lesson, but the minute you give her friendly advice (leg on/breathe) she gets really, really offended. I’m trying not to be rude because we have all been there, me especially!
If she won’t hack and she insists on having the school to herself, the onus is on her to work around other people and not hog it at peak time, surely??

I mean I hate spectators watching me ride but that’s my problem - if I’m that desperate for no eyes on me when I ride then I certainly don’t rock up at 5-7pm and expect it!
 

sport horse

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What happened to the old fashioned idea of discussing the problem. There are only 5 liveries + YO. Call a yard meeting over a cup of tea and discuss the problem. Do not fail to understand her problem and her wish to have the school on her own but also clearly state that this is preventing the rest of you from riding when you want. Throw this into the pot as a starter and see what she then suggests. Perhaps she does not even realise how it has impacted on you? Direct speech often solves the problem and lets face it it cannot be much worse!
 

PapaverFollis

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Yup. I think you need to tackle this head on.

"Can I have a quick word about school use? We all understand that you prefer to ride alone, and we have tried to accommodate that, but it's actually making it really difficult for the rest of us to fit our riding in. We're all busy too. Can we agree that between (PEAK TIMES) that the school is open to all? And if you want to ride solo or have a lesson you can book it for (LENGTH OF TIME) outside of those hours. We're all happy to help if you want to work on getting more comfortable with riding in with others too. Perhaps we can arrange to have a schooling session where I ride in with you but we just walk and then we can work up from there? Or maybe on of us could ride your horse in with the others first to see how he behaves? I'm sorry this will make things more tricky for you but it is pretty standard practise at most yards to ride in with others at peak times and it really is the only way to keep things fair for everyone"

Either one to one to test the water or in the context of a yard meeting or the yard owner needs to say it. But you do need to just tell her she's causing a problem. Softened with the offer of help with her problem.
 

Smogul

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I think you just need to get on in there and if she doesnt like it,she can always leave. It really is her issues causing the problem, not yours and in all fairness, she cant expect everyone else to work around her. Unless the YO is going to stipulate rules, then its a bit of a free for all and if everyone else is happy to share, she will have to go along with the majority or pick a quieter time to ride
I can sort of see both sides of this as I am the only carriage driver at yard and some horses are initially unsettled by us so I do sometimes go for a hack instead of working in the school. Also, a couple of liveries have been hopeless at allowing for width and length of carriage when passing. However, YO is totally supportive and says new liveries just have to get used to it.
 

Surbie

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Like others have said, surely this could be sorted out over a cuppa?

We have shared use unless it's a lesson - I always ask before going in regardless, but personally I think it's good for my horse to be exercised in a variety of ways and that includes solo/in company.
 

Leandy

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I can sort of see both sides of this as I am the only carriage driver at yard and some horses are initially unsettled by us so I do sometimes go for a hack instead of working in the school. Also, a couple of liveries have been hopeless at allowing for width and length of carriage when passing. However, YO is totally supportive and says new liveries just have to get used to it.
WHAT?! Now I would object to sharing with a horse and carriage, how big is your school? Sounds plain dangerous unless your school is ginormous?
 

ihatework

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WHAT?! Now I would object to sharing with a horse and carriage, how big is your school? Sounds plain dangerous unless your school is ginormous?
Yes, I wouldn’t be sharing a school with a carriage driver! But of course fair access to a facility for both riders and drivers should be arranged.
 

Smogul

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WHAT?! Now I would object to sharing with a horse and carriage, how big is your school? Sounds plain dangerous unless your school is ginormous?
Why? Ridden and driven horses co-existed for centuries. Plenty room for me to work in one half while someone rides or lunges in the other half. We hack out with ridden horses too.
 

Leandy

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Why? Ridden and driven horses co-existed for centuries. Plenty room for me to work in one half while someone rides or lunges in the other half. We hack out with ridden horses too.
Of course they can coexist yes once the ridden horses are used to the idea (which they generally aren't today, unlike in previous centuries) - where there is room. However, I was having difficulty with the idea that you can work properly a horse and carriage (presumably the combined size of a large vehicle at least) and one or more ridden (or lunged) horses in a typical sized arena without either impeding each other so badly that proper work is not possible or risking a nasty collision. If that isn't the case then presumably your school is in the "ginormous" category!
 

ester

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my main concern would be length, and ability of a carriage combo to take evasive action in a multi-use school. I've driven in a 20x40 with a small pony, that is plenty tight enough without a ridden horse to avoid. I'm trying to decide if it would have been ok in my old yard's school (60x25ish) and suspect it would depend on all involved parties if no one wanted to stay on a 20 m circle, which generally speaking I don't.
 

Leandy

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my main concern would be length, and ability of a carriage combo to take evasive action in a multi-use school. I've driven in a 20x40 with a small pony, that is plenty tight enough without a ridden horse to avoid. I'm trying to decide if it would have been ok in my old yard's school (60x25ish) and suspect it would depend on all involved parties if no one wanted to stay on a 20 m circle, which generally speaking I don't.
Yes, exactly.
 

Nayumi1

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In my experience this causes more problems as people book the school at peak times and you’re back to square one.
we have that at our yard. The book gets booked out months on end for the peak times, an hour at a time (some people 3 times during the week) so you can't get in
 

Leandy

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And to some posters points about using one half only. Assuming a school is a typical size, I expect to be able to use all the area of the school and not to have to restrict myself to half of it because someone else wants to hog the other half. If each user abides by normal school rules each user should be able to use the whole school and not be unduly restricted. I might agree (or offer) to use only part of the school in exceptional circumstances as a one off but it would be very annoying to be restricted in this way regularly when it is meant to be shared use.
 
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