What's Your 'I'm Being An Idiot' Moment?

[AShetlandBitMeOnce]

The clipping conversation in the trolling thread made me think about times when I have realised I am doing something that most people would think incredibly stupid, but I carried on as it worked for me and my horse at the time, so I thought it may be quite funny to ask HHO what is your 'I'm being an idiot' moment?

Mine has to be when I was clipping Jacob and I put his front leg up on a wooden mounting block and sat underneath him to clip his elbow - he was as solid as solid can be to clip so I didn't think twice - only when I realised I was clipping and the hairs were falling directly into my lap. Kneeling behind him to do his hock area was probably quite dim too!

He was also farting around about a herd of cows on a hack once on the other side of the gate, so I switched it round and reversed him through the gate and them and onto a place we usually have a good gallop.. Luckily I had my hunting cane so could hold the gate open - not sure why that one worked but I'm sure it would have made any spectator roll their eyes!

 

[ihatework]

The one that still makes me cringe with shame at my own stupidity …

I was backing a 3yo, didn’t have many facilities and was therefore using the 3yos grazing paddock which was the flattest and most contained.

Worked the 3yo in its kit and did some leaning over stuff then figured I’d just untack the 3yo there and leave it out.

Only for some unknown reason I left the saddle until last. And there was a 3yo loose in a paddock wearing just it’s saddle ?

Thankfully 3yo was angelic and did not take advantage of my Darwin moment

 

[Cowpony]

Put overreach boots on a horse's hind legs once.

And after a competition a couple of years ago, my friend was leading her horse up the lorry ramp. I'd left my whip on the ramp and went to pick it up. Suddenly realised my unprotected head was level with her horse's hocks. Luckily nothing happened, but it could have been a Darwin Award moment.......

 

[FestiveG]

While clicker training the appy to pick up her feet, after a very hairy event with a vet and a foot abcess, realised that it was midnight and no one knew that I was out in the stable, in fact there was no one at home!!!!

 

[Berpisc]

Putting my hand into a large water trough to pick out the electric fence wire that had dropped in when one of the youngsters had been fiddling with it....yes, the energiser was still on

 

[Fluffypiglet]

I quite often crouch in front of my horse to put his overreach boots on (they have buckles) before I turn him out and whilst crouching directly in front of his legs, I leave the stable door wide open, so that I have room to manoeuvre... . Luckily he doesn't just trample me on his way out as he has very good manners in this regard.

 

[AShetlandBitMeOnce]

Put overreach boots on a horse's hind legs once.

I think you can be forgiven for this one! I used to put over reaches on all four on Jacob as he would take chunks out of his back hooves by treading on himself, and sausage boots didn't do the job.. I used to get some looks for it though!!

 

[AShetlandBitMeOnce]

Putting my hand into a large water trough to pick out the electric fence wire that had dropped in when one of the youngsters had been fiddling with it....yes, the energiser was still on

I chuckled at this, that is brilliant! I leant over a fence which had an electric strip at the top to pat another HHOs' cob while they were in the school once, I conducted the electric straight through to poor cob's nose and he jumped out of his skin and went to spin off - once I stopped laughing (thankfully rider stayed on) I did try to apologise, but it took a fair few treats for him to forgive and trust me again. He is one of the most clever horses I have ever met, and I am convinced he has the ability to hold a grudge!

 

[abbijay]

After hunting my horse he could be a bit "spicy" whenever they came near. I thought they'd gone so I was leading him out in a headcollar, although for some reason I had a hat on. His reaction told me they were nearby again so I clambered up the nearest thing and hopped on his back. Yup - riding a 18hh heavy horse who could leg it with the best of them bareback in a headcollar rather than get tossed around like a rag doll on the ground. I definitely didn't come off and I don't recall being bogged off with so it must have worked!

 

[smolmaus]

And after a competition a couple of years ago, my friend was leading her horse up the lorry ramp. I'd left my whip on the ramp and went to pick it up. Suddenly realised my unprotected head was level with her horse's hocks. Luckily nothing happened, but it could have been a Darwin Award moment.......

Caught myself at this on Sunday, bending down behind a horse I don't even really know, while poo picking the paddock. That's not worth getting the little tiny bits that the fork misses!

 

[lottiepony]

I have a nitwit horse who is so sensitive that you become hyper alert to doing anything that could be remotely risky or lead to him having a melt down. It's almost like having spidey senses lol!
The only good thing is that maybe you end up safer? or you just become a total nut job yourself by doing things in a certain way, i.e only put rugs on from the left hand side and always fold in half like the books used to tell you and never leaving leg straps undone as they could touch his delicate legs...

Has anyone seen the film Lemony Snickets a Series of Unfortunate events? - I am basically like Aunt Josephine.

 

[Errin Paddywack]

Put overreach boots on a horse's hind legs once.

I used to put overreach boots on my mares hind legs because she used to catch the side of her hoof with the opposite one and would make it bleed. She wore through the boots very quickly.

 

[Gloi]

Not horse related but this morning while doing a job at home I sat on the coffee table. The top came out and fell to the floor and I ended up wedged in the frame in a very undignified position. Took me a bit to get myself out and I have some good bruises developing. I'm a liability.

 

[MereChristmas]

I was getting out of the horsebox.
As I dropped to the ground the hem of my very long T shirt became caught on part of the seat adjustment mechanism.
I was trapped with the T shirt hooked behind me and as I am not tall my toes not quite reaching the ground.
I managed to swivel round and pull myself up on to the seat and unhook the shirt.
Fortunately no one noticed. I think.?

I also used to hook my mare’s foreleg over my shoulder to clip the wrinkly bits. I wouldn’t dare with any other horse but she always went to sleep whilst being clipped.?

 

[ycbm]

Loving all these ?

I have so many, being of an extremely impulsive nature, that I've lost count. Rasping feet without tying up is probably my most repeated sin. I mean, what could possibly go wrong?
.

 

[Cowpony]

I was getting out of the horsebox.
As I dropped to the ground the hem of my very long T shirt became caught on part of the seat adjustment mechanism.
I was trapped with the T shirt hooked behind me and as I am not tall my toes not quite reaching the ground.
I managed to swivel round and pull myself up on to the seat and unhook the shirt.
Fortunately no one noticed. I think QUOTE]

Ooh that's reminded me of another one. Went to get the keys out of the lorry cab, so just got up on the step to lean in. Half turned round to jump back to the ground, caught one foot in the other and sort of rebounded my head against the metal doorframe. Had quite an egg from that one.

 

[IrishMilo]

I used to take my idiotic, bucking bronco Welsh Cob galloping through fields in a headcollar. Bareback. With no hat on. I genuinely feel a little bit sick thinking of it now.

 

[Annagain]

Going to the yard to turnout at 7 and then intending to go straight back to bed so doing the whole thing with a hoodie over pyjamas and braless. The car broke down, had to be towed away by the AA and 4 hours later I was sitting in the Land Rover main dealership in the middle of town in wellies, pyjamas a hoodie and no bra. Not quite a Darwin moment unless dying of embarrassment is actually possible.

 

[Elf On A Shelf]

I always wear some sort of hat - baseball cap, beanie hat, bobble hat etc on the yard. So I thought nothing of tacking up and heading up the gallops. There was a string of about 8 or 9 of us and no one noticed I had my baseball cap on until we had walked a mile and a bif down the road and got to the top of the gallop! Nothing I could at this point but carry on, finish my work and head home! I had a hat on my head it just wasn't of the hard variety ??? done it a few times since too but luckily people have noticed before I have left the yard ?

 

[blodwyn1]

Today I dismounted was supporting myself on my ponies backside as I stepped of the mounting block said good girl she walked forwards and I fell backwards into nettles! I felt very foolish.

 

[BBP]

Decided to ride a very very shiny and slippery pony, in the dark, with no tack, not even a neck strap. Pony was jet black on a very dark night. Pony is also not the most sensible of creatures and apparently neither am I. When he spooked and I came off (damn slippery shiny horse!) I was fortunate that a) I was able to reach my back pocket to pull out my phone and b) my sister wasn’t too far away. I lay face down on the floor for about 15mins, trying to get my breath, before heading to hospital and finding I’d cracked my ribs. Biggest Darwin moment is that I still sometimes try to do the same.

More recently and not horsey, I decided to sharpen the blade on an already extremely sharp garden scythe, but wasn’t wearing PPE or paying attention, so my hand slipped and I sliced my finger in half lengthwise. (Not quite as bad as my friend who was using a circular saw unsupervised and managed to cut three of his fingers clean off)

 

[Annagain]

Ooh I just remembered finding a huge burr in between old boy's legs right at the top where certain things used to dangle. For some inexplicable reason, I just reached out, grabbed it and yanked it off (there is no way of saying that without it sounding incredibly dodgy) while standing directly behind him....I had a perfect horseshoe shaped bruise on my thigh for weeks and I couldn't even be angry with him because it was entirely my fault.

 

[Red-1]

Was off to the seaside with my horse one day. Yay!

Put everything on the wagon, horse included. Set off through the gate. It would have been more successful if I had put the steps up first

Sadly, the steps were mashed and wouldn't go up, so the trip was off until a mechanic had come to mend them.

 

[HanniRT]

Put overreach boots on a horse's hind legs once.

And after a competition a couple of years ago, my friend was leading her horse up the lorry ramp. I'd left my whip on the ramp and went to pick it up. Suddenly realised my unprotected head was level with her horse's hocks. Luckily nothing happened, but it could have been a Darwin Award moment.......

Did something very similar at the Cumberland Show in the early 90's. It's been nearly 30 years and it still makes me shiver thinking about my stupidity!

 

[tda]

I always wear some sort of hat - baseball cap, beanie hat, bobble hat etc on the yard. So I thought nothing of tacking up and heading up the gallops. There was a string of about 8 or 9 of us and no one noticed I had my baseball cap on until we had walked a mile and a bif down the road

Done this a few times !

Earlier this year, while trying to close a pair pf gates in wind, swung one forward, stretched over to get the other one, caught both, slipped on the gravel, and fell forward, didn't let go of the gates so faceplanted , black eye, but could have been worse, at least I didn't let the ponies out ?

 

[scruffyponies]

Driving a pair of ponies, no groom as usual. One pony's girth broke, so there's me crawling underneath the pole between the two of them, tying the remains of the girth together with bailing twine, muttering 'stand babies' and hoping to goodness they decide to humour me.

 

[humblepie]

stepped out of lorry living not realising steps not there. Backwards onto concrete drive. Mopped blood off back of head and went to show. I wasn’t driving but was riding and rode really badly. Think probably a bit worse for wear. Still makes me shudder and check the steps.

 

[SEL]

Going to get on small fat pony without re-checking girth. Saddle slipped, opposite stirrup flew up and iron smacked me right above my eye.

Work had to cancel the website photoshoot due to my purple eye ?

 

[Gloi]

Long ago it was fashionable to bleach tie dye jeans and I had just done mine.
I rode my pony to the beach which was 15or so miles away. (We were young and fit then). We went in the sea for a while, got an ice cream and set off to ride home. I noticed my jeans had ripped and it seems the salt water had reacted with the bleach in the cloth and they were falling to bits. They got worse as we rode and by the time I got back to the stables I was virtually in my knickers.

 

[Caol Ila]

Crouching in front of Foinavon to do up his hoof boots.

Rasping the 3-year old without tying her up.

However, nothing beats the people I saw the other week. Myself and my friend were riding in Mugdock Park, and as we came around the corner of the visitor's center, we saw a horse (no one we knew), fully tacked up, grazing on a patch of grass in front of the building. No human in sight. We wondered if we were going to have to start a search and rescue mission looking for a fallen rider. As we got a little further around the corner, we saw a second horse, fully tacked up, grazing beside the first one. Also, no accompanying human. Had two people fallen off, we wondered. We got around to the front of the building, and saw a third horse, this one with a human holding it. They were standing a good ten or so meters away from the unattended horses. Nowhere near close enough to control them. My friend and I pointed to the loose horses and said, "Is everyone alright?"

"Oh, yes," said the lady brightly. "They're just in the shop buying a coffee."

Riiight. One of the loose horses lifted its head and looked like it fancied following our horses, so we reined them in and waited for the owners to come out of the coffee shop. This is a busy country park just outside of Glasgow. Lots of kids, bikes, dogs, wheelchairs, other horses, you name it. And the visitor's center is the busiest part of the whole damned park! Near the road! My friend and I were pretty astounded. When I'm watching a TV show or movie and a character just drops the reins and lets their horse graze unattended while they engage in some intense drama, I will complain to OH, "That's so crazy. No one ever does that. You'd worry about it taking off or doing something stupid."

Turns out, I was wrong. People actually do that. In Mugdock, of all places!