Would you get a sharer if you were me?

N

NellRosk

Well-Known Member
Joined
7 May 2013
Messages
2,726
Location
West Yorks
Visit site
I just don't know what to do! I've got to the point of writing an ad out a few times then deleting it all because I panic at the thought. I have 2 horses, a 15 yo schoolmaster and a rising 5 year old. The youngster is at a point where she needs schooling frequently to improve her education and my old boy is a bit fat and unfit so really needs working too. I work full time and my dad is in hospital and everything's just getting a bit much. Everyone's telling me to sell the younger one but I'm quite attached to the big daft thing and she's going to be really nice when she's matured and will be a great horse for me when I eventually retire the older one and it would be a shame to sell her.

So my question is should I get a sharer for my old boy? He's fantastic to do, hack/ school and would suit someone looking to do a bit of light showing/ sj/ dressage/ fun rides/ anything really. The thing is I feel really panicky at the thought of someone riding/ doing him. Has anyone else been like this and managed to get over it and let someone else do their horse? I've just feeling a bit overwhelmed at the moment and could do with a hand.
 
It sounds like you have a lot on your plate at the moment, so yes, in your situation I would consider getting a sharer. Whilst I have never shared out a horse of mine, I shared a horse long-term whilst his owner was pregnant and then had her hands full with the baby. It suited us both really well and I cared for him exactly as she wanted - you can definitely find a responsible sharer who you'll be able to trust.
 
Sounds like a shared could be beneficial to you, just be careful of who you choose and have a trial period. I had a shared for about a month before I decided it wasn't worth it, but then again she wasn't the right rider for my horse.
 
happybear said:
It sounds like you have a lot on your plate at the moment, so yes, in your situation I would consider getting a sharer. Whilst I have never shared out a horse of mine, I shared a horse long-term whilst his owner was pregnant and then had her hands full with the baby. It suited us both really well and I cared for him exactly as she wanted - you can definitely find a responsible sharer who you'll be able to trust.
Click to expand...

I do think it would be a good idea and I wish I wasn't so panicking and worried about it all! It's nice to hear a success story. Did the owner charge? I don't want people coming to joyride him so a small fee might put the timewasters off
 
Grinchmass said:
Sounds like a shared could be beneficial to you, just be careful of who you choose and have a trial period. I had a shared for about a month before I decided it wasn't worth it, but then again she wasn't the right rider for my horse.
Click to expand...

I know I'm worried in case some absolute nightmare comes! Was she okay about it when you told her you didn't want her sharing your horse anymore? I hate aggro!
 
Yes, if you can find the right person it might be really beneficial for you to have some breathing space. Yes she did, I had him 3 days every week, 4 days every other week, for £120pcm. DIY so I did all jobs on my day. As time went on, I ended up doing 5 days a week and she didn't charge me any more as she was more than happy with how I was looking after him, but I would have happily paid more (and offered!!)

That said, I know she had some far from ideal people come and look at him. So I can completely understand your POV and why you're worried. She watched me ride him the first few times and supervised me while I did his jobs, and in our case the YM would have told her if she'd had any doubt as to how I was caring for him when the owner wasn't around. References could be a good idea too?
 
NellRosk said:
I know I'm worried in case some absolute nightmare comes! Was she okay about it when you told her you didn't want her sharing your horse anymore? I hate aggro!
Click to expand...

She was a nice girl, but she was riding my horse with excruciatingly short reins, my mare is a saint to a fault, but really soft in the mouth, it was painful to watch her riding and ponio became a bit stiff and objected to any contact, stressage pony went to giraffe. Plus she didn't really seem too keen on the sharer, although she can be quite contrary and choose to dislike some people for no apparent reason, although I'm gathering why she wasn't too keen on the sharer.


If anything it's taught me something, and my girls back to normal now so no real harm done. I did broach the rein issue a few times, but to no avail. I don't have a sharer at the moment, buit it has taught me to be pickier and to have a longer trial period if I ever have one in future.
 
happybear said:
Yes, if you can find the right person it might be really beneficial for you to have some breathing space. Yes she did, I had him 3 days every week, 4 days every other week, for £120pcm. DIY so I did all jobs on my day. As time went on, I ended up doing 5 days a week and she didn't charge me any more as she was more than happy with how I was looking after him, but I would have happily paid more (and offered!!)

That said, I know she had some far from ideal people come and look at him. So I can completely understand your POV and why you're worried. She watched me ride him the first few times and supervised me while I did his jobs, and in our case the YM would have told her if she'd had any doubt as to how I was caring for him when the owner wasn't around. References could be a good idea too?
Click to expand...

Thank you, this is really helpful :)! I may write a tentative 'feeler' ad and see what kind of replies I get and take it from there, I'm comitting myself by writing an ad. Did you have to sign any kind of agreement and what did you do re insurance? I'd be worried in case someone fell off and seriously injured themselves!
 
For me I have had sharers/riders occasionally.
Last year I had one for a horse that I didn't have time for and needed exercising.

For me my utmost priority was to have someone capable and reliable that I could trust 100%. I found such a person and decided not to charge so as to hopefully keep her!

ETA the only stipulation I made was that they had BHS gold cover
 
Grinchmass said:
If anything it's taught me something, and my girls back to normal now so no real harm done. I did broach the rein issue a few times, but to no avail. I don't have a sharer at the moment, buit it has taught me to be pickier and to have a longer trial period if I ever have one in future.
Click to expand...

That's good that she recovered from her ordeal! A trial period is a good idea if I do decide to get one. Did you have any kind of written agreement?
 
I did horse share for a couple of years before getting my own again, I never had a written agreement it was all verbal.
 
NellRosk said:
Thank you, this is really helpful :)! I may write a tentative 'feeler' ad and see what kind of replies I get and take it from there, I'm comitting myself by writing an ad. Did you have to sign any kind of agreement and what did you do re insurance? I'd be worried in case someone fell off and seriously injured themselves!
Click to expand...

No problem! Yes I signed a share agreement which I think is really normal and would definitely recommend, especially if you want stipulations on how the horse should be cared for or ridden, e.g. in my case, mucked out on my days and not travelled without permission etc. I was required to get my own rider and third party insurance, which you can get from becoming a Gold member of the BHS.

Your boy sounds like a perfect catch so I'm sure you won't struggle to get a reply, it just depends who answers it! For what it's worth I would have loved to share him while I was at uni in West Yorks two years ago!!
 
I decided to look for a sharer for my old man as I was working full time and wasn't able to ride every day. I phone interviewed everyone to start with, then had people come meet him, then ride.
Two people rode and I told them they were unsuitable, one I wouldn't let on him as I didn't like their attitude lol. One girl was lovely, but after a week would turn up late, not do duties and b*gger off again so she went sharpish.
I had 2 girls who were lovely but one ended up going off to uni and the other emigrated to new Zealand lol! They were doing 3/4 days a week between them and payed £10 on their days, plus mucking out/poopicking, waters, feed, hays etc.
I then found another lady who was a bit nervous so would take it very easy with him, just hacking out or gently schooling which was fine by me and she used to do so many chores that I let her share him for free. She was so good with him as well that it was worth not having the money coming in.
I was very picky, watched them ride the first 5-6 times and spent time up the yard with them when I could so they were doing everything 'properly' ie my way haha :)
It sounds like you could do with a sharer but it is your horse, if you don't like the way they ride or do chores, say so! :)
 
Yes! I was in much the same situation as you, older gelding who has had some unsoundness, so I was picky about who I would trust with him, and a younger mare who was not making any improvement as I didn't have time to put consistent work into.
I advertised and weeded out the emails, first lady interested in the mare, rode beautifully but decided yard was just too far to travel for her. Then had a older lady interested in my old lad, and I liked her straight away. She liked him, she just wanted an hour or so hack a week of no-drama riding. Then I found a mum and daughter who lived locally, were known to people at the yard, and daughter is riding the mare 3 times a week, mum is hacking with her on my gelding once at the weekend. Her riding needs work, only as she's moving on from riding school ponies, but she's keen as mustard, and agreed to weekly lessons until she and the mare are more established. They came to the yard half a dozen times before we agreed to go ahead, daughter has BHS gold for insurance, but we have no written agreement. For the first time in a long while I'm looking forward to getting both horses out this summer, and I actually get a huge amount of pleasure from knowing how much fun my horses are giving to other people. :)
 
happybear said:
No problem! Yes I signed a share agreement which I think is really normal and would definitely recommend, especially if you want stipulations on how the horse should be cared for or ridden, e.g. in my case, mucked out on my days and not travelled without permission etc. I was required to get my own rider and third party insurance, which you can get from becoming a Gold member of the BHS.

Your boy sounds like a perfect catch so I'm sure you won't struggle to get a reply, it just depends who answers it! For what it's worth I would have loved to share him while I was at uni in West Yorks two years ago!!
Click to expand...

Okay, that does sound very sensible! He is but then I might be biased :) You sound lovely, it's a shame you still don't go to uni up here!
 
BellaBoyzie92 said:
I decided to look for a sharer for my old man as I was working full time and wasn't able to ride every day. I phone interviewed everyone to start with, then had people come meet him, then ride.
Two people rode and I told them they were unsuitable, one I wouldn't let on him as I didn't like their attitude lol. One girl was lovely, but after a week would turn up late, not do duties and b*gger off again so she went sharpish.
I had 2 girls who were lovely but one ended up going off to uni and the other emigrated to new Zealand lol! They were doing 3/4 days a week between them and payed £10 on their days, plus mucking out/poopicking, waters, feed, hays etc.
I then found another lady who was a bit nervous so would take it very easy with him, just hacking out or gently schooling which was fine by me and she used to do so many chores that I let her share him for free. She was so good with him as well that it was worth not having the money coming in.
I was very picky, watched them ride the first 5-6 times and spent time up the yard with them when I could so they were doing everything 'properly' ie my way haha :)
It sounds like you could do with a sharer but it is your horse, if you don't like the way they ride or do chores, say so! :)
Click to expand...

Thank you for sharing your experiences, it's extremely helpful!
 
Crazydancer said:
Yes! I was in much the same situation as you, older gelding who has had some unsoundness, so I was picky about who I would trust with him, and a younger mare who was not making any improvement as I didn't have time to put consistent work into.
I advertised and weeded out the emails, first lady interested in the mare, rode beautifully but decided yard was just too far to travel for her. Then had a older lady interested in my old lad, and I liked her straight away. She liked him, she just wanted an hour or so hack a week of no-drama riding. Then I found a mum and daughter who lived locally, were known to people at the yard, and daughter is riding the mare 3 times a week, mum is hacking with her on my gelding once at the weekend. Her riding needs work, only as she's moving on from riding school ponies, but she's keen as mustard, and agreed to weekly lessons until she and the mare are more established. They came to the yard half a dozen times before we agreed to go ahead, daughter has BHS gold for insurance, but we have no written agreement. For the first time in a long while I'm looking forward to getting both horses out this summer, and I actually get a huge amount of pleasure from knowing how much fun my horses are giving to other people. :)
Click to expand...


Wow that does sound a similar situation! Sounds like you've found the perfect solution for your two and I bet that feeling of other people enjoying your horses is lovely. I'd love to find someone who maybe couldn't afford their own horse (young teen maybe) but is really keen and willing. Roski would provide so much fun, he really is awesome!
 
It does - the keen teen is very sensible and so willing to learn (easier to have someone to teach 'your' way, rather than someone who already has 'their' way!) and all three of them are absolutely lovely people. Although she will be mainly riding the mare, I'd quite like another season of veteran showing with the old dude, (he'll be 22 this year) and she's very up for helping prepare him, and ride, so I can just be groom for the day. I've never really had a 'team' before so I'm actually stupidly excited about the whole thing. Plus I'm not that keen on jumping, so she will be the one who'll so that with the mare. It takes so much pressure off, time-wise and is certainly a help cost-wise. I didn't use facebook groups though, I advertised on a local equine website. Just take your time, you don't have to take the first person who comes along, go with your gut feel and see them on and around your horses. You soon get an idea of if you'll click with them or not. Good luck!
 
Ive had various sharers over the years. Unfortunately they all ended up unreliable. You have to be a bit laid back about it all and let them get on with it, which is hard, but I was also working full time and it took the stress of having to ride out of it rather than wanting to ride. Now i work part time I have more time and recently let someone ride my horse twice a week. She was scared to ride on the road ( my mare is bombproof!) so went in woods all the time. The result was a highly strung pony that I didnt recognise. It depends on the horse. My previous horse was snaffle mouth and had done working livery so was used to everyone, but also could look after herself. All horses have acted differently with sharers to me though.
 
My friend has 2 oldies and was in a similar position to you. We found a sharer for each of them £30 per week no duties as friend runs full livery yard. It has worked really well, but we did have a few wierdos come and try. I don't think either of them have ever been groomed this much which is really nice. They have even brought little things for them and it is so nice that they have their own "person".

I think they get more attention now than P and my top horses!
 
I'm a sharer and like to think I'm not a total nightmare ;)

Have shared a 15 year old schoolmaster type last year (unfortunately he went lame so had to be retired), his owner had hurt his back and couldnt ride him enough as he needed so I had him 4 days per week at a cost of £120 per month. Suited both me and the owner as I cant afford my own horse but can afford a small contribution each month if required, and the owner needed his giant 17.3hh exercising! Still friends with the owner to this day :)

I think a sharer would be the right thing for you, it would be a shame to sell the youngster when you havent got to experience her full potential yet, and of course your 15 year old is still more than capable of work and someone could get a lot of enjoyment out of him.

Just be prepared for some unsuitables to be in touch, inevitably you will get some foolish people who over-estimate their own abilities, who mess you around and who waste your time. But as you have seen there are a few good sharers around, so you just have to be patient and wait for the right person to come along. You should be able to vet the potential sharer from their message to you, you can spot a bluffer a mile off. And then when someone messages you who 'sounds' good, then get them over for a visit and watch them ride. If you are not happy with their abilities then it is well within your rights to explain that they are not suited to your boy.

Then if you do decide to go ahead with one person, then have a month's trial first. Sometimes the first ride you watch them have might be ok, but as time goes on you find you dont like some aspect of their riding or the way they care for your boy. So the month's trial gives you the opportunity to get rid of them if you are not happy.

Following that you can sign a share agreement together, the BHS has a template (google BHS loan agreement or share agreement, something should come up!) that you can adapt to suit your situation.

Sharing can be a great thing and you will probably find you get pleasure out of seeing someone enjoy your horse, and you will find pleasure in knowing your boy has a 2nd mum (or dad!) who loves him like you do and takes great care of him. And if at any point its not working or you want to end the agreement, just write into your contact that either party needs to give 1 months notice to terminate the share - then you can 'escape' relatively quickly and easily!
 
NellRosk said:
That's good that she recovered from her ordeal! A trial period is a good idea if I do decide to get one. Did you have any kind of written agreement?
Click to expand...

I didn't have a written agreement but would if I ever decided to loan in future. I think it's made me feel twitchy about leaving someone alone to ride my girl, although I can stick a novice on her and they won't do her any harm, so lond as they've got soft hands. I've found the problem lies with people thinking they can ride like Hester.
 
You could always try someone for a trial and if it doesn't work out you can just end the agreement and keep looking. It sounds like
a sharer would benefit you and for a near bombproof you would
have them queuing and could afford to be choosy...
 
kc100 said:
I'm a sharer and like to think I'm not a total nightmare ;)

Have shared a 15 year old schoolmaster type last year (unfortunately he went lame so had to be retired), his owner had hurt his back and couldnt ride him enough as he needed so I had him 4 days per week at a cost of £120 per month. Suited both me and the owner as I cant afford my own horse but can afford a small contribution each month if required, and the owner needed his giant 17.3hh exercising! Still friends with the owner to this day :)

I think a sharer would be the right thing for you, it would be a shame to sell the youngster when you havent got to experience her full potential yet, and of course your 15 year old is still more than capable of work and someone could get a lot of enjoyment out of him.

Just be prepared for some unsuitables to be in touch, inevitably you will get some foolish people who over-estimate their own abilities, who mess you around and who waste your time. But as you have seen there are a few good sharers around, so you just have to be patient and wait for the right person to come along. You should be able to vet the potential sharer from their message to you, you can spot a bluffer a mile off. And then when someone messages you who 'sounds' good, then get them over for a visit and watch them ride. If you are not happy with their abilities then it is well within your rights to explain that they are not suited to your boy.

Then if you do decide to go ahead with one person, then have a month's trial first. Sometimes the first ride you watch them have might be ok, but as time goes on you find you dont like some aspect of their riding or the way they care for your boy. So the month's trial gives you the opportunity to get rid of them if you are not happy.

Following that you can sign a share agreement together, the BHS has a template (google BHS loan agreement or share agreement, something should come up!) that you can adapt to suit your situation.

Sharing can be a great thing and you will probably find you get pleasure out of seeing someone enjoy your horse, and you will find pleasure in knowing your boy has a 2nd mum (or dad!) who loves him like you do and takes great care of him. And if at any point its not working or you want to end the agreement, just write into your contact that either party needs to give 1 months notice to terminate the share - then you can 'escape' relatively quickly and easily!
Click to expand...

Do you fancy coming to West Yorkshire and sharing my boy? :) Thanks for this, very reassuring and lots of valid points!!
 
I share a Horse with owner who still looks after her Horses on own land that she no longer rides due to illness. It has worked out great for both of us. I do on average two days a week including jobs and riding I do not pay and I don't think I should. If I was just riding then Yes. But I can spend two hours there various jobs at a time not nice jobs either!
 
Sounds just like my situation, I have an 18yo and a 10yo, I have two part loaners for my old boy and it has worked out really well, they have had him for a year now.
Through experience I have learned that you do need to iron out the kinks as straight away, I do tend to be as laid back as i can but if anything needs addressing then i'll just mention it.
They both pay £25 each week and do 3 days each, I pay for everything so any extras, tack, shoeing, feed etc all comes out of my pocket.
I would advertise sooner rather than later as it can take months to find the right person, even though my boy is bombproof and a schoolmaster, he is set in his ways and i am rather fussy as to who i would have looking after him, it took me about 4 months to find the right person but i'm glad I did it as it started to feel more of a chore with the horses where as now the fun element is back.
 
He is geoooorguuuuusss.

I am sure you will have plenty of responses before long. Do you have a local FB horse page? Mine is quite sensible and nothing like chit chat and tack. What about you local RC, ours has website and a FB page too.

Might be worth mentioning specifically what he is like to hack/in traffic.
 
Magicmillbrook said:
He is geoooorguuuuusss.

I am sure you will have plenty of responses before long. Do you have a local FB horse page? Mine is quite sensible and nothing like chit chat and tack. What about you local RC, ours has website and a FB page too.

Might be worth mentioning specifically what he is like to hack/in traffic.
Click to expand...

Thank you, I'm very fond of the big lad :) it says on preloved it's had over 1000 views but no response! I could have a look at local FB groups, thanks! And could put ads up in local tack shops/ venues too
 
I agree that local fb groups are a good idea.

You might like to mention your facilities, especially if you have a manege? floodlights for evening riding? good off road hacking ? whether he enjoys hacking out alone or whether there will be others to hack out with etc, that might encourage some sharers?
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top