Your ride only...........or anyone????

Elsbells

Elsbells

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I think my mare has a preferance which sounds mad.

I'm a novice rider of older years, but own a very nice, talented, street savvy and smart as a button SH mare whom I adore and unfortunatly, she knows it.
She is always a good girl for me, we do miles of hacking on our own together and she will school and jump for me, which I was told she had given up on.

The thing is, I would like her to be ridden by other people as I think it is good for her and also I am aware of the possibility that one day, due to my OH illness I may have to put her out on a permenant loan.

My riding is rubbish and it is she that keeps me up there and I feel 100% safe and looked after by her, but friends say they feel very differently when they have, or have tried to ride her. She does not seem to like another rider, does not like them even getting on and can go from my sweet little girl to a naughty and objectionable time bomb! She is always cross after and so the next time someone tries to ride her, she's worse. Unless it's me of course:confused:

Is this common? Should I worry? Is it my fault? Will she always be like this or should I do something about it?

I need some direction please.

Oh...and it's not just the riding, this girl chooses her friends carefully.
 
I think its a mare thing - they form much stronger bonds with their owners/riders. My big mare won't let anyone else ride her - she freaks out when they try and get on and if they do then she won't stop throwing herself around until she gets them off. Little mare is better but she's never had a rider before so its different.
 
I hear where you are coming from, mine can be the same, the trick is generally to try and find someone who will pander to her ego and 'big her up', once she feels valued by a rider my mare respects and rides well for them :)... most of the time :D:D
 
My mare is exactly the same. When I got her, she had been a broodmare for 4 and a half years, and hadn't been sat on in that time.

I found her SO safe to ride, that I suggested a friend (whose horse was at that time on box rest with buggered tendons) take her out...


they came back ten minutes later, following a spectacular temper tantrum halfway down the drive...

Nobody can ride her but me, unless they're suicidal. I think it must be a girl thing!
 
queenbee said:
I hear where you are coming from, mine can be the same, the trick is generally to try and find someone who will pander to her ego and 'big her up', once she feels valued by a rider my mare respects and rides well for them :)... most of the time :D:D
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Sounds good. How do you do this though? She does like a quiet rider(I just sit there:o). Is that what you mean?
 
I find my horse, who is very well schooled, and who is very easy and light to ride, will take the mickey out of my novice OH, and for him, my horse turns into a really stubborn, nappy plod.

If you are worried, especially of you are thinking of loaning her soon, I would book a few lessons with an instructer riding her. It may be that your friends are not sending her the right signals and she's getting confused?
 
only the more confident and experienced riders could ride my lad.....my sis in law had a love hate relationship with him lol.

He had his own quirks...he bucked and set his thick neck against you if he didn't want to do anything...you just had to know how to work this.
 
i can't help but think that its probably more something to do with different riding styles of the people riding your mare than it being you in particular- does that make sense?
so some horses really don't like a strong contact for example and so will pratt about if someone gets on and grabs hold of the reins... some people have 'hot seats' and can wind up a wooden horse etc etc.

my horse is pretty polite (most of the time) but if someone tried to ride him in a radically different way to me then he'd flip his lid- not because he likes me per se but because i ride him 99.9% of the time so he's used to being ridden in this way.

my friend takes in horses for schooling and gets a lot of showing horses in. i always have to go up and sit on them because the owners want loads of people to ride them so that the horses get used to it for when the judges get on them ...
 
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My horse tolerates other people riding him, but he doesn't like it unless they have quiet hands and ride him like I do. I had to learn how he likes to be ridden - learning experience for me to get the best from him!
 
Definitely think it is to do with the way a horse is normally ridden. We have a gelding and he is happy to be ridden by other people, but needs a very light contact and a quiet calm rider - then he as good as gold. If he is ridden diferently he naps, bucks and is really spooky! I think they test you out as well to see what they can get away with with a new rider.
 
I had exactly the opposite with my loan mare! I never felt she 'liked' me, whereas others loved her. She was a very responsive ride, would hack, school etc and really taught me a lot, but in the end she just wanted me off! She bit me, bolted, reared, bucked and dumped me 3 times before I sent her home.

But I was never as scared as I was today on Hugo! :(
 
My mare can be ridden by anyone and we make sure lots of different people ride her as I don't want her taking offence to a ride judge and chucking them off in the ring.
 
My boy is like this but only if you start asking things of him - if you just want him to walk,trot ,canter he will with no issue but if you expect him to work into an outline and a contact he will throw a bit of a hissy to begin with :D
 
My boy I have always said is really safe and great now (didnt used to be and have always been completley honest with everyone but i have 9yr old novice kids walk and trot him round the school on his own now quite happily which for a 17hh 9yr old warmblood is not something many people would trust their sensitive horses with!) but just today my sharer hacked him out on a faster hack for the first time and she said she couldnt stop till she overtook everyone and he was strong and silly not at all spooky just wanting to go all the time..... woops!!

I then realised I was actually the only person who had hacked him since he had started behaving and he is a bit of a git for anyone else, same in the school my sharer hadnt told me when she asks him for a bit more he gets grouchy and starts kicking out a back leg occasionally and backing off the leg which he used to do for me till he realised i dont give up and he gave in! Some horses I think are just more 1 to 1 than others :)
 
My horse has broken the only 4 other people except my instructor I let on him!! I just daren't let anyone else now just in case! Little bugger just bucks and drops his shoulder ;)
 
Given that horses have brains and obvious likes and dis-likes in other spheres of their lives, I guess that they too can 'like' or otherwise their rider, whoever it may be :)

My horses definitely go differently for different riders, but so far, none of them have been particularly horrible to a person that isn't me, D1, or instructor.
 
haha this is so true! I had a polo mare that would not have anyone on board, she bucked and had a right paddy when my best freidn tried to ride her ...it seems to be a mare thing, my geldings don't seem to be as fussed but all horse's seem to build up a rappor with their owner's don't they, we get to know their quirks!

My x-racer can be a bit frisky with me but if i put a family member/more novice on he is good as gold and looks after then completely! Horse's are so amazing x
 
elsbells said:
Sounds good. How do you do this though? She does like a quiet rider(I just sit there:o). Is that what you mean?
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toomanyhorses26 said:
My boy is like this but only if you start asking things of him - if you just want him to walk,trot ,canter he will with no issue but if you expect him to work into an outline and a contact he will throw a bit of a hissy to begin with :D
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I maybe have got totally the wrong idea (if so then sorry)

But I think this might be the case, you say you are a novice so she looks after you! Maybe when others ride her she knows instantly (even by the way they stand and mount) that they are going to expect more work from her and she thinks no way I like the way things are THANK YOU can't say I blame her and what a smart lady :D


My lad is the opposite if someone rides him he goes all quiet and won't go forward, keeps looking at me I have to talk to him and reassure him. Getting him to go forward enough to pop a little jump is not easy. Yet with me I am constantly half halting. I am not know to have an electric butt so its not that. I just think it is a confidence thing with him
 
Could it be that because, in your own words, you pretty much just sit and steer, she rather likes being in control. When friends get on, they ask more of her and she doesn't like it?

I always used to swear my horse was the easiest horse to jump ever- yet my sister (who is a far better rider than I ever will be) hated jumping him (apart from XC mostly!) because she'd try and set him up and sort out strides and stuff, and he liked being left alone so used to throw absolute fliers or shuffle right in!
 
Ellie is definitely a one-rider horse :p

It's my fault, admittedly - I'm so precious about her that I've never wanted to let other people ride her...and on the odd occasion that they have, it's been pretty disastrous! The worst case was when my SJ instructor (who found Ellie for us in the first place and spent the next 3 years trying to buy her back once he realised what a cracker she was :p) - the first time he got on her, she reared straight up with him, although we put that down to him having spurs on. Then a couple of years down the line, we hired a big indoor school for a schooling session, and he got on Ellie to take her through a grid....and ended up with both bones in his right leg snapped in two :eek: She's just very sharp, and although he is 10000 times the rider I will ever be (he's won at HOYS, Olympia and been on Nations Cup teams), I think she just caught him out!

I've let my brother and my boyfriend sit on her on the lead rein, but that's as far as it goes. Mum refuses to ride her because she says she's too sharp - and she used to work on a racing yard! LOL :D
 
My friend schools my horse for me, as she is a million times more experienced than me. I sit and watch and learn. Occasionally I find myself thinking what a lot of horse she is and I hope she doesn't get that strong or that fast with me:eek:

I get on board and she is a totally different horse, I really think she knows my limitations, and looks after me. Maybe they are a lot smarter than we think.
 
Lolo said:
Could it be that because, in your own words, you pretty much just sit and steer, she rather likes being in control. When friends get on, they ask more of her and she doesn't like it?

I think this maybe it!

Quite a few of you clever and sensible folk have said the same and I think you are right. There are times when we are cantering about in the fields and she'll just jump puddles, itsy bitsy ditches, sticks n stuff without warning and just for the fun of it!:eek:
I,... well I am afraid am nothing but a passenger.:o

And this is a mare who has given up the jumping circuit, Ha!;)

My friend rides well, very, very well and expects Elz to work in an outline in the school when asked.............Mmmmmmmmmm, no chance.

Fancy a buck instead?!
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elsbells said:
Lolo said:
Could it be that because, in your own words, you pretty much just sit and steer, she rather likes being in control. When friends get on, they ask more of her and she doesn't like it?

I think this maybe it!

Quite a few of you clever and sensible folk have said the same and I think you are right. There are times when we are cantering about in the fields and she'll just jump puddles, itsy bitsy ditches, sticks n stuff without warning and just for the fun of it!:eek:
I,... well I am afraid am nothing but a passenger.:o

And this is a mare who has given up the jumping circuit, Ha!;)

My friend rides well, very, very well and expects Elz to work in an outline in the school when asked.............Mmmmmmmmmm, no chance.

Fancy a buck instead?!
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LOL - maybe it's something to do with being called Elz? Mine is exactly the same - jumps puddles, freaks out on hacks at nothing, and refuses to work in an outline. Haha :D
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elsbells said:
Lolo said:
Could it be that because, in your own words, you pretty much just sit and steer, she rather likes being in control. When friends get on, they ask more of her and she doesn't like it?

I think this maybe it!

Quite a few of you clever and sensible folk have said the same and I think you are right. There are times when we are cantering about in the fields and she'll just jump puddles, itsy bitsy ditches, sticks n stuff without warning and just for the fun of it!:eek:
I,... well I am afraid am nothing but a passenger.:o

And this is a mare who has given up the jumping circuit, Ha!;)

My friend rides well, very, very well and expects Elz to work in an outline in the school when asked.............Mmmmmmmmmm, no chance.

Fancy a buck instead?!
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maybe it is her way of showing you that you can jump? My first ride was a smart WC one day without warning he just cantered 4 or 5 strides and came back to trot. He actually did this a couple of times before I realised he was telling me I was 'ready' to canter

You perhaps need to do just little things to start with like making sure it is ALWAYS ALWAYS you idea to change the pace. Halt somewhere you don't normally BUT INSIST if she argues

how long have you had her?? If longer than a year then FABBY she is ace!!! and you are so so lucky to have found her. If only a short while I would start to do the things I said otherwise it is likely that she will start and dictate if you ever do anything different.

Don't panic its not a big problem, just start to ask the little things, and use your imagination of what else you can do to make sure its all your idea not hers. Otherwise one day maybe when she is in season and doesn't fancy going 'that way' she may well just start napping
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After reading these, I have to say I'm glad my mare behaves for others - although she is very sharp and is very much of the mindset - I look after me and you look after you - if you don't stick with her then that's your problem :D Everyone gets dumped equally. lol.
 
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