Anyone else just think they can't do this?

sheep said:
This thread makes me slightly uncomfortable. All I can say, and I think many others would agree, is that I sincerely hope Cedars gets the help and support she needs- regardless of what the actual issues may, or may not, be.
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Agree^^^^^^^^^^
 
Well, just caught up. Don't know what to believe but all I can say is whether it's fact or fiction clearly something is wrong and I do hope Cedars is ok
 
grumpyoldmare said:
I wish I was nasty enough to post a copy of the pm I have just received....but in view on the content of said pm it has only confirmed what some posters are saying.

OP has serious mental health issues, Walter Mitty doesnt have a patch on this lass believe me......it is very curious and a strange twist of fate that she has chosen to tell a pack of lies in a pm, to probably one of the few people in a position to have experience enough in the field she mentions, to know beyond a shadow of a doubt that 99 per cent of her persona is fantasy.

I will try very hard to ignore anything she posts from now on - but I just hope to God that she NEVER gets a job teaching children - or for that matter, anything that might let her have any influence on any young people within her circle. Did she say she is a nanny???? Christ!!!!:eek: And her poor parents - I feel for them.
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good god, and you didn't say anything really bad
Ibblebibble said:
ohhh excuse me while i go all Oprah on you but 'you go girl' :D
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Thank you... I'm here all week:D
Puppy said:
:eek::eek::eek:

Why on earth would you get engaged to someone who you can say all that about....?
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Because the violence erupted as a result of a major inability to communicate on his part, he cheated and was violent, but it did not make him a bad person, just a small minded man who came from a small town, who had been positively brainwashed into thinking that he could have anything he wanted, that consequences did not matter and that he was better than everyone else. Plus the farming culture down here is errr... wierd :rolleyes: furthermore he had no comprehension of how to treat someone or of what a real relationship entailed. It took a lot of work to find ways to communicate, to find more productive ways of saying 'you hurt me and that wasn't nice' we went to couselling, plus puppy it is my belief that his thought processing is not what you would expect in a 'normal' person, and I also suspect that he has aspergers. Things are very black and white and he has tried very hard to understand the shades of grey for the sake of his relationship. Things are much improved, and we are still working on things, but in all honesty if I had the money I would move away, simply because a fresh start would be easier for me than the hard work of fixing a relationship that became very badly damaged. There are a lot of other factors involved that led to our downfall, but as I said, I will not be going on here airing my dirty laundry to that extent, its none of anyone elses business. I am colder and harder, I stand for far less s hit, but it does not mean I am not warm and loving, I am just more selfish, I went into a relationship as I always do giving my love and trust freely, I have never stopped loving him, but for me to be the gushing housewife, that has to be earnt now. We do get on, we are alright and we have fixed ourselves but I had to change in order to be able to deal with being with someone like him, what i mean is the 'mindset' it is no different than the other people from his background down here, they are all tos sers :D and I want to throttle him, but he means no harm or offence and would do anything in his power to make me happy. I love him and could spend my life with him and it could be good, but the past has made me defensive and I suspect a bit restless. To help you understand the ins and outs I would have to absolutely spill my guts to you and I am not doing THAT. :D

You will also see, that I said If I knew how much effort it would take in advance, I would have bailed, I didn't so I rode it out to the other side. I was probably flipant when I said I wouldn't be with him, I probably will be, I wouldn't have agreed to marry him if I couldn't see it and believe in it and want it, but I am more cautious because of the past.
 
This thread has turned horrible. Inconsistencies happen in life with changing seasons, moods and situations, it does not make the OP a liar. Plus WTF does this thread have to do with any past threads? Why not (Sidesaddle) just let people give advice and the OP receive it?
 
I think plenty probably have their own thoughts about cedars but keep their own counsell, unfortunately being a forum plenty of others won't.
Cedars I just hope you get it sorted so you're ok with it :)
 
Quote de horsegirl
18 wheelbarrows????? How long since you pooh picked the fields? That must be a month at least!
Actually, the three horses at mine (15.2-16hhers) probably produce almost exactly that in a week. And I have a BIG barrow

I am getting through so much haylage...

A week??? I have 2 horses both 16.1 who eat non stop unlimited hay and I pick 2 barrows a week out of their field and it is completely clear.
 
Flame_ said:
This thread has turned horrible. Inconsistencies happen in life with changing seasons, moods and situations, it does not make the OP a liar. Plus WTF does this thread have to do with any past threads? Why not (Sidesaddle) just let people give advice and the OP receive it?
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Who died and made you Queen?

I am interested in how you have picked on me when there are many others who have also stated how Cedars has lied. Why haven't you mentioned them too?

Cedars' threads have a habit of turning horrible as the truth comes out.

I wondered why she had posted this relationship type problem in NL rather than SB, but I guess she has worn that audience out.
 
horsegirl said:
Quote de horsegirl
18 wheelbarrows????? How long since you pooh picked the fields? That must be a month at least!
Actually, the three horses at mine (15.2-16hhers) probably produce almost exactly that in a week. And I have a BIG barrow

I am getting through so much haylage...

A week??? I have 2 horses both 16.1 who eat non stop unlimited hay and I pick 2 barrows a week out of their field and it is completely clear.
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Then I think you have a poo thief! :D

When mine are out 24/7 a paddock of three does two barrows a day (14 a week). If course now they are in most of the time, but I still get almost one barrow load a day.
 
Well I don't know, it's a small field which is why I have to clear 100% every week. I have a reasonable size barrow but not one of those massive ones. Maybe it's the yard dogs getting in and eating it all. :)
 
Sidesaddle said:
Who died and made you Queen?

I am interested in how you have picked on me when there are many others who have also stated how Cedars has lied. Why haven't you mentioned them too?

Cedars' threads have a habit of turning horrible as the truth comes out.
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LOL, Queen? OK, if you say so.

I have not "picked on you", I replied to you in particular because Cedar's threads have a habit of turning horrible when you join them.
 
Sidesaddle said:
Who died and made you Queen?

I am interested in how you have picked on me when there are many others who have also stated how Cedars has lied. Why haven't you mentioned them too?

Cedars' threads have a habit of turning horrible as the truth comes out.

I wondered why she had posted this relationship type problem in NL rather than SB, but I guess she has worn that audience out.
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Probably to avoid you, but it didnt work did it!
Lots of people post in both SB and NL, , although most who post in here have at least some interest in horses!
It is quite sad i think for you to have come in to NL just to post on her thread, i usually have a lot of time for you SS, but you and a few others have gone down in my estimation quite a bit tonight.
 
Fii said:
Probably to avoid you, but it didnt work did it!
Lots of people post in both SB and NL, , although most who post in here have at least some interest in horses!
It is quite sad i think for you to have come in to NL just to post on her thread, i usually have a lot of time for you SS, but you and a few others have gone down in my estimation quite a bit tonight.
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Yes, it is sad that this has happened like this.

It is sad that people who have realised what is going on, are having to defend themselves against being called 'bullies', I don't know if the OP is telling the truth or not, because when I mentioned the fact a story didn't compute, all hell broke loose and I was accused of several unpleasant things, by many posters. I quickly realised what was going on, and although I certainly now don't believe what the OP says, I'll continue to post on the thread if the OP is asking a question and I have an answer, such as I answered here - 'when I was at uni, I didn't have the horses'....

I don't think you can blame at all, those who wish to be truly vocal about the situation, because just because someone is saying 'woe is me'...is it the law to have to believe it? If the OP really has these issues, then a forum is NOT the place to airing those problems, and I hate to see other posters, genuinely thinking they are giving advice, could well be being suckered.

I could say MANY MANY things, but will restrain myself, because as you say, it's a public forum.
 
Fii said:
Probably to avoid you, but it didnt work did it!
Lots of people post in both SB and NL, , although most who post in here have at least some interest in horses!
It is quite sad i think for you to have come in to NL just to post on her thread, i usually have a lot of time for you SS, but you and a few others have gone down in my estimation quite a bit tonight.
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I think that considering some posters offered practical help, including a place to stay, they do have a right to know if their chains are being pulled by a fantasist. One day, such a person might turn up on their doorsteps and they would be justified in feeling angry if people who knew better had kept silent as the saga was gathering momentum on a forum. While I do feel sorry for people who need the meagre attention of posters on a forum, its not healthy for ANYONE, the fantasist or the respondent, to feed that need. It solves no problems and can be dangerous for all concerned. This is not a comment directed at Cedars, on this subject, I have no opinion. :)
 
DragonSlayer said:
If the OP really has these issues, then a forum is NOT the place to airing those problems, and I hate to see other posters, genuinely thinking they are giving advice, could well be being suckered.
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I would far rather take the risk of a poster not telling the truth/the full truth and still giving advice or reassurance than making a potentially vulnerable young adult feel even worse by accusing them of lying. How that is me 'being suckered' I have no idea :confused: I don't have finite resources of empathy :)

It's no skin off my nose if anyone is lying on here, it does not affect me personally... I agree a forum is not always the best place for personal discussions but if you truly believe you don't have anyone else, what do you do?
 
I havent called any one a bully!
I just think some people should take a step back, and consider the affect their words may have on a vunerable young girl.
 
rhino said:
I would far rather take the risk of a poster not telling the truth/the full truth and still giving advice or reassurance than making a potentially vulnerable young adult feel even worse by accusing them of lying. How that is me 'being suckered' I have no idea :confused: I don't have finite resources of empathy :)

It's no skin off my nose if anyone is lying on here, it does not affect me personally... I agree a forum is not always the best place for personal discussions but if you truly believe you don't have anyone else, what do you do?
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Then that is your choice, if you wish to believe it. But if it has been shown by previous posts that the OP is not getting the stories straight, then what CAN we believe? Are we to be guilt-tripped into thinking that 'we might be responsible' for anything that might happen...? Not in my book.

...and there are MANY MANY avenues someone can turn to for help....it is up the OP to find those, because the OP at some point, is going to have to take charge of her own destiny, no-one here is going to be able to do that.

...and let's say, for arguments sake....the OP is taking us all for a ride, what if someone here actually bent over backwards to try to do their best to help, and it turns out it was all codswallop? I'd feel bad about that, if I knew what I did, and said nothing....

..but maybe people are right, and I'm wrong. Let the OP carry on, let people try to help, and let the circle continue....as it will, until the OP realises a forum is NOT going to solve all her problems.
 
rhino said:
It's no skin off my nose if anyone is lying on here, it does not affect me personally... I agree a forum is not always the best place for personal discussions but if you truly believe you don't have anyone else, what do you do?
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I will confess I have used this forum to get impartial advice on a relationship situation - and damn it all if the posters weren't right and I wasn't a bit blind, so I'm glad I did and took the advice :o

I don't care if someone "suckers" me (wth?) by lying about something like this, but I do wonder what the point of a forum is if you just lie and fabricate on it. The OP clearly has problems, so I wouldn't hold it against her (though I might be wary of future threads if I remember...). It is a bit of a worry that people with such serious issues might end up teaching impressionable kids though...
 
I'm with DragonSlayer on this one.

The OP posted a detailed character assassination of this man and his mother. My sympathy for her stopped before I'd finished reading it and for that I make no apologies.
 
It is a bit of a worry that people with such serious issues might end up teaching impressionable kids though...


This is what would concern me also. I would not want my child having a teacher with such issues.
 
DragonSlayer said:
She is a 21 year old woman I believe, classed as an adult.
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Yes classed as an adult, but still a young girl in my book.
My daughter is 23, that is still young to me.
Maybe it's the mother in me, i have a protective instinct, and it comes to the surface sometimes.
 
horsegirl said:
A week??? I have 2 horses both 16.1 who eat non stop unlimited hay and I pick 2 barrows a week out of their field and it is completely clear.
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I know, I know, it's bonkers, but honestly true. :o

My retired mare is renowned for what a ridiculous amount she can produce, but the other two are pretty impressive too! A lot of it is the haylage though, they weren't so bad before that became the bulk of their diet.

15.2hh in foal, TB, per day (*waves* at Jemima_too :D):
12.5kg Haylage
500gm topspec stud balancer
400gm Lucie nuts
Scoop of dengie hi fi


16hh, retired, WB, per day:
12.5kg Haylage
500gm topspec lite
handful of good doer chaff

15.2hh, v light work but still growing Connie x TB, per day:
17 kg Haylage
500gm Topspec comprehensive
400gm Lucie nuts
500gm linseed
scoop of dengie hi fi

= a bit over 2 LARGE barrows of poo per 24 hours! :eek:

It is blooming ridiculous! Never had such 'production levels' with my old girl who was 16.2 and ate way more :rolleyes:


Ho hum, there's my attempt to get the thread back to onto a horsey topic! :p
 
Fii said:
Yes classed as an adult, but still a young girl in my book.
My daughter is 23, that is still young to me.
Maybe it's the mother in me, i have a protective instinct, and it comes to the surface sometimes.
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Thats fair enough....I was paying towards a mortgage when I was 18...so maybe I've missed that stage completely!

:D
 
Puppy said:
I know, I know, it's bonkers, but honestly true. :o

My retired mare is renowned for what a ridiculous amount she can produce, but the other two are pretty impressive too! A lot of it is the haylage though, they weren't so bad before that became the bulk of their diet.

15.2hh in foal, TB, per day (*waves* at Jemima_too :D):
12.5kg Haylage
500gm topspec stud balancer
400gm Lucie nuts
Scoop of dengie hi fi


16hh, retired, WB, per day:
12.5kg Haylage
500gm topspec lite
handful of good doer chaff

15.2hh, v light work but still growing Connie x TB, per day:
17 kg Haylage
500gm Topspec comprehensive
400gm Lucie nuts
500gm linseed
scoop of dengie hi fi

= a bit over 2 LARGE barrows of poo per 24 hours! :eek:

It is blooming ridiculous! Never had such 'production levels' with my old girl who was 16.2 and ate way more :rolleyes:


Ho hum, there's my attempt to get the thread back to onto a horsey topic! :p
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We get one barrow a day out of each of the paddocks....if you leave it, you are doomed! :(
 
Mine don't live out so I get a barrow each from their stables each day but they are out 12 hours a day.
I don't know where the food goes for my tb certainly not into fat :)
 
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