Anyone just can’t/hasn’t achieved their horsey dreams...

[Sprat]

My parents have always been quietly supportive, but not particularly involved anymore.

As a child, I asked for lessons for my birthday and that carried on for a couple of years where both mum and dad would come and watch my lessons. Mum and Dad separated when I was very young but they both made an effort to support me, and helped financially when I loaned ponies as a kid. I decided that boys and booze were far more fun at about 16 and gave up which I desperately regret doing. I started loaning again at 21, and when my loan mare came up for sale both parents very kindly helped me out with some money towards the sale.

Dad has met each of my horses since then, and while he is a little scared of them he always asks after them, and brings an apple or two to feed them on his yearly visits. I actually managed to get mum on my first owned mare (which looking back was quite a stupid idea, she was a demon and not for a novice). She occasionally makes noises about wanting to learn to ride properly but has never taken me up on the numerous offers I've made. I think mum has been to one of my many competitions, and dad none, but I've made my peace with that. It's not their thing.

I'm very lucky with my parents really. They don't really understand the obsession, and I'm sure they thought I would have grown out of it by now but it's just not going to happen. But they both always make sure to ask after Bean. My mum always makes me smile when she asks if I need to go the yard on Christmas day.... 'But it's Christmas!' Yes mum, but unfortunately the horse isn't quite capable of looking after herself.

After my friend was killed last year, Mum had a real wobble as she knew her well and watched her grow up, and I think it hit home quite how dangerous the sport can be. She offered to buy new hat / body protector etc, and was fretting a lot but thankfully seems to have trusted me enough to at least keep her fears mostly to herself now.

I do find myself feeling a bit jealous of friends with horsey parents who often go competing and hacking together, but on the flip side I'm also happy that horses are just 'my thing' in the family. It gives me my own time and space.

 

[Winters100]

My Mother was a huge influence in my riding. She used to ride very well herself in her teens and had her own horses for many years. In her early 20s however she had polio and after that was disabled. She could not walk around or handle the horses, and she worked full time running her own business so time was an issue, but at weekends she would spend hours sitting in the car with the door open while she explained to me the proper way to do wraps, plait, clean the water trough properly and just about everything else. It was a real bonus as I learned to do a lot at a young age. Although she was nervous of me riding, I think because she spent some time getting more mobile in a specialist unit where she shared a room with a girl who was injured in a riding accident, she was always positive and encouraged me. I rode alone a lot of the time from about 10 years old, and there was only one unbreakable rule - never get on a horse without a hat. I will always be grateful that she gave me a passion for horses that I still have today, and also, with the example of how she lives her life, has taught me that attitude is everything. She never complains, takes every difficulty (and indeed indignity, because if you are disabled there are plenty of these) with good grace and humour. It was always my dream to get her on a horse again, but sadly time waits for no one, and now I finally have a saint of a horse who would be suitable Mum is 80 and past the age where this would be a pleasure for her!

 

[thefarsideofthefield]

My parents weren't horsey but supported both my sister and I when we started to show an interest .
My kids had their own ponies at home when they were young but by the time they were in their early teens neither were remotely interested in riding . My son got into rugby and whilst my daughter would help me with my horses ( and was brilliant at getting them ready for shows ) she had zero interest in having her own . She is now grown up with children of her own and is happy to come here to stay and look after the horses/dogs for me and my OH when we go on holiday . She is competent and confident but it wouldn't bother her if she never saw another horse in her life again !
When my grandchildren were younger they learnt to ride on our Shetland , thoroughly enjoyed looking after him , rode him in the school and around the fields , and we spent lovely days as a family all piling into the horsebox and going to local shows with him - they've got stacks of proudly displayed rosettes and trophies from doing Lead Rein , Bonny Pony , Handy Pony etc and even now can recount in detail all the fun things and good times they had riding . But now , at 10 , my grand daughter is into dance and drama and my grandson , at 9 , is into triathlon . And neither wants to ride anymore !
Where did it all go wrong ?
Interestingly though we have fostered , on and off , for over 30 years and latterly have specialised in older/ harder to place teenagers . It has been a real eye opener as to which ones have taken an interest in the horses and how it has helped to shape them - not always the ones you would think ! A couple have even gone on to have jobs in the horse industry - and one of them came to us believing that horses were carnivores !
Guess the horses either get in your blood or they don't ?

 

[splashgirl45]

my mum used to ride and work at a stables, she always rode the same horse and she treated him as her own, when the war came all riding stopped ,she then got married and had me so horses were not on the agenda for her anymore. i was always horse mad for as long as i can remember and one day my dad went to the loft and came down with a saddle and bridle which had been up there for a long time. there was a short bannister at the bottom of the stairs and this became my horse. i spent hours riding and imagining it was a real horse. on my 11th birthday i got a pair of jodhpurs, the ones with wings!!, older members on here will remember them, not flattering and was taken to a shop and bought a hat.there was also an envelope with the jods which said i had a course of lessons booked...i loved it and i used to stay after my ride and help out(not sure how much help i was ) as i got older and better i was allowed to exercise one of the liveries and was always being asked to ride various horses both on my yard and elsewhere. i didnt get my own till i was 21 as i had to save for a car first so i could get to the yard,and then my horse and i used him as lead horse when i took the rides and i worked as well so my livery was cheaper. i have owned horses for over 50 years and only gave up due to physical difficulties, but would love another horse in my life..come on lottery

 

[Firefly9410]

I had the fantasy that I wanted an ID cross and I wanted to event for fun. But I knew it would never happen because of money. So I got a cob who I planned to hack. This was my dream: to own a horse and ride all over the countryside and go to competitions. So I achieved my dream. The cob was unbroken and turned out to have talent so I trained for eventing anyway just in case. We never did get to do any though. But I enjoyed the training. I had no instructor and did the best I could by myself. I feel so happy to have horses in my life which is not easy and I make many sacrifice to do it. Whenever times are hard I remind myself that I wanted this life and now I have it. Mostly I am grateful for every minute. Even when I am very old I think I might get a mini Shetland and drive. I cannot imagine ever giving up horses completely.

 

[paddy555]

My father died eight years ago, but not long ago my mum said he always hoped I’d give up horses. Nil support or interest as a kid or adult, I had to have poxy piano lessons for eight sodding years instead.

did we have the same parents? I too had somewhat unenthusiastic parents especially my dad. Only when I had passed grade 8 was I allowed to give up the poxy piano lessons.

 

[Spotherisk]

did we have the same parents? I too had somewhat unenthusiastic parents especially my dad. Only when I had passed grade 8 was I allowed to give up the poxy piano lessons.

As we’re both on Dartmoor (I think) it is a possibility, ?