Anyone just can’t/hasn’t achieved their horsey dreams...

[milliepops]

Has anyone read Bounce by Matthew Syed. He talks about the need for life to be tough for the best athletes to flourish. If you give people everything on a plate then they may enjoy it enough without working too hard to get quite far along in their competititve career. But won't suceed long term as inevitably something will discourage them - injury or a plateau or the demands of the training. So perfomance funding given too early means the wrong people are supported. But if you don't ease the journey too soon, then only those with that real desire will get anywhere at all so you find the people with that mindset early on. THEN help them with funsing, faclities etc. Makes sense to me....

that's interesting. on a theoretical level

as a non-pro, I have to confess that the hard days when all the bills come in and there's not really a way to cover them can leave you wondering what the bloody point is, and whether it will ever get any better, but I can't really imagine ever giving up

Sort of connected but an aside really, I was the absolutely driven pony mad child. Rode my pony and then anything else I could get my mits on. My parents were desperate to put me off, not really liking horses and not being able to afford one other than on £5/week farm livery. Looking back it still smarts how little support they gave and how little interest they took. It was really only when I was sort of adopted by an immensely generous horsey lady in the next village that I could ride to, that I got a bit of help to develop. she gave me a tremendous leg up and is the one who got me into eventing.

Dad is still hoping i will give up, he can't get away fast enough if I mention the horses. Mum did say she now felt bad that they went so far out of their way to make it difficult for me.

 

[Ambers Echo]

Daffy / MP, thank you for sharing your stories. I don't doubt you've put in the hard graft and long difficult hours.
Do you have any advice for those of us who have much more modest dreams and are still struggling to progress?
I've heard it trotted out on here "any horse should be capable of jumping 1m and riding an Ele test" well that level of riding is my dream and despite trying I'm nowhere near that level. And it does get to me.

From a Sports Psychology POV - I saw an on-line klesson that helped me think of ways to move forward: Think of an X-Y graph. X axis is level of competition from training show at the bottom to Olympics at the top. Y axis is level of rider - from just starting to jump x poles up low level to an Olympic athlete. A line bi-secting that graph upwards from left to right is the sort of 'appropriate level of competition for the rider'. So cross pole rider at entry level X pole clear round competitions to Olympic rider at the Olympics. That line will be where things are very comfortable for a rider.

If you go above the line and go up a level that is where you are likely to make the most improvement. Where you will push yourself out of your comfort zone and improve. On the other had if you drop below the line that is the zone where you are likely to build the most confidence. So you need to work out what the limiting factor is, what the priority is and enter events or stucture training appropriate for that.

You need to also do the same graph for your horse. Exactly the same applies. A nervous horse can benefit from dropping a level to build confidence, a confident but inexperienced horse can gain a lot from going up a level and learning from that.

So you end up with 2 graphs and wheher you go with the rider or horse graph depends on which is the lower as you need to go at the pace of the lower of the 2.

Also another trainer talked a bout the need to not look at outcomes but at process and not look at where you wanr to be but where you ARE. What is the very next step. And then the next step. And then the next step. What is in the way? How can you address barriers? I found with Amber that I could be stuck for ages feeling like I was getting nowhere then suddenly something would fall into place and there would be a fairly rapid step change. But it was not rapid really - it was months in the making. But it was months of basic foundation work before suddenly that work could translate to an improvement in performance.

 

[Ambers Echo]

Looking back it still smarts how little support they gave and how little interest they took. It was really only when I was sort of adopted by an immensely generous horsey lady in the next village that I could ride to, that I got a bit of help to develop. she gave me a tremendous leg up and is the one who got me into eventing.

I think active discouragement is a little different. We all benefit from having people in our corner. My friend's daughter does not have the money but does have the support which is obviously helpful for her. My dad could not tell me what my horse's name is. My mum is (belatedly) supportive.

 

[milliepops]

I think active discouragement is a little different. We all benefit from having people in our corner. My friend's daughter does not have the money but does have the support which is obviously helpful for her. My dad could not tell me what my horse's name is. My mum is (belatedly) supportive.

yes definitely. I think this is why I have found knowing other people in the same boat so useful. no one else can do the work for you but the solidarity is priceless.

 

[milliepops]

thinking about graphs and lines is interesting, i don't think I would think of my horses in those terms but I can understand the rationale behind it. In terms of progression though, presumably there's something behind those graphs that informs how a horse and rider combination need to break down the learning? seems to me the graphs are more relevant to competition (and personally I think of progression in terms of training achievements or milestones rather than what level I'm at in the ring). I think the hows, whys and whens of the training underpinning everything are probably the more difficult to figure out by yourself, particularly if it's your first time riding at that level.

 

[huskydamage]

I am never satisfied with anything I do! Tbh this lockdown and not being able to compete has been a relief, I miss going out to stuff but I have just been hacking and enjoying my horses with no worries about goals, stress about booking leave, trying to organise transport, being late off work etc and rushing to get to an event with no sleep!
I always have this obsession about jumping bigger because I am embrassed entering small classes in my 30s against little kids. Everytime I do a bigger class, I want to do a bigger class!
I also did endurance on my pony but I had to retire her right before we had booked to do red dragon. I wanted to get to red dragon with my new horse, but the first year I registered her for endurance she has a horrendous field accident. This year Ive tried again and we all know how thats gone!
I love getting out to stuff but this has realised its really not a big deal if I don't.

 

[Roxylola]

I have regretted many times my own lack of knowledge about possible jobs and how the job market works. Given my way I would have done a horse course at 16 and degree at 18. As it was I was not allowed to move away from a levels and a degree that would offer a career. Which I studied for 18 months before giving up to work full time, to fund my horse! I was always discouraged from making horses my life, my riding and competing despite being something I did with no help was disapproved of at best and something which just really got in the way of what I "should" have been doing.
I've still got to where I am in spite of it all and enjoyed it but it could have been easier certainly

 

[Ambers Echo]

Millie-Pops - There was a bit more detail. But essentially it boils down to making sure you are in a learning zone, not the comfort zone. But the learning zone is uncomfortable! It is a place where you are exposed, you feel out of place, you may struggle

Many people don't move up into the learning zone because they don't feel 'ready'. Many others won't move down a level to build confidence because of ego or embarrassment or a sense that going down is going backwards. So the graphs just give a rationale for decision making that may get people out of that rut.

 

[milliepops]

that makes sense. for sure the learning zone can be painful! again I think this is when great training is invaluable because someone who is an excellent teacher should give their pupil the confidence to try something new or difficult, even if they are going to fail the first few (hundred) times because for many of us I think it's learning from mistakes that makes the difference between blagging something and really fully understanding it.

 

[Ambers Echo]

Yes I agree. The graphs are about compeititon but also about training. For me all training is structured towards a competitive goal. My first SJ comp on Amber was a disaster because I had no control by fence 3 and ran past fence 4! Circled, regrouped, tried again and ran past fence 9. We were way out of our comfort zone but it was useful failure in that it really highlighted the need to focus on a rideable rhythmic canter. I thought I had achieved that at home but the learning was not solid enough for the buzzy ring. So I hired a SJ venue and did 'courses' of poles on it. Then x poles. I also did endless canter work at home. And when I next entered it was she was clear and far more controlled.

 

[Roxylola]

I've seen the zones done as concentric circles for those who dont like the graph idea, so you have the smallest circle is the comfort zone, the next is the learning zone and beyond that I think you have the danger zone - AE, that first experience sounds like edging from the learning into danger there

 

[milliepops]

yes I think this is where dressage in particular is potentially a different kind of training (at least at the amateur levels) because it is very clear that you never really tick off a concept as being "done" in that tickbox fashion and you are constantly revisiting and refining the same basic things throughout the horse's career. e.g. Suppleness is never done, you might get sufficient suppleness for prelim but all the way up the levels you constantly need to go back and work on it more without really a defined state of "enough". you might have enough suppleness to do a canter half pass from once side to the other, but it could always be MORE supple even at the level you are competing at - a supple *enough* half pass might get you a 6, but an excellently supple one could net you a 9

so you are picking up and putting down things constantly - better contact, more self carriage, more responsiveness, more throughness, more this more that and that's before you even think about training the movements for competition - i think they are kind of separate to the basic stuff underpinning it.
tbf those basics are there in all disciplines in one form or another, a polo pony needs to be responsive, an xc horse needs to be gymnastic, i still think the application and development of the basics is sometimes a bit of an abstract thing to decide how to approach, in what order and to what degree because they are on a continuum (compared to can I jump a metre or not) and probably the bit that many riders struggle to figure out. if your horse runs out of skinny fences, just riding at more skinny fences won't fix that, work on the underpinning basics will fix that.

 

[palo1]

that makes sense. for sure the learning zone can be painful! again I think this is when great training is invaluable because someone who is an excellent teacher should give their pupil the confidence to try something new or difficult, even if they are going to fail the first few (hundred) times because for many of us I think it's learning from mistakes that makes the difference between blagging something and really fully understanding it.

Yes!! As a teacher for dyslexic and autistic adults the only thing I have learnt over 25 years is that you cannot know what someone's potential is at any point and that someone who has struggled with something for many years can suddenly have things fall into place and develop great strategies/new learning. The very best thing to facilitate that (one of the only really useful things in 'teaching') is to facilitate the confidence of trying new/difficult stuff and providing a genuine sense of safety, honest understanding and positivity for people to do that.

I do think working with horses/personal goals is similar which is why a great trainer is actually vital and is the thing I believe we should all invest in, far more than some of the things we do either 'invest' or indulge in!! Unfortunately in equestrianism there seems to be a strange and slightly unhealthy obsession with the status and achievement of trainers rather than their actual skill in teaching/training. I have had loads of students way more talented than I, who have gone on to achieve amazing things and that has brought me huge joy and satisfaction. For those students my status or 'achievement' have never been an issue but I do work in a very different field and tbh am highly qualified etc so that isn't questioned in my context.

 

[milliepops]

i couldn't agree more palo.
I bang on about it all the time but it's because i know so many people who have been stymied by either ineffective, ungenuine or downright shonky teaching. And I know what a transformative effect a good lesson with the right person can have on you.

Safety to try, fail, try again and help someone find the way through a problem is a big one. genuine desire to see the pupil succeed is another. then ability to impart information in a meaningful way. I think qualifications are less important - a person can be a great teacher without having any, though that's not to say that they are not useful because having a range of approaches is potentially valuable l and I think a more "coaching" style that's promoted these days is probably more versatile.

track record, is quite a big one for me. I want to go to someone who has a track record of producing riders like me with horses like mine, to a level that I aspire to. It's reassuring if they've done it well themselves too because when it comes to planning for competition, you know they've walked the walk and fully appreciate what you are attempting. but for the abstract bits of training, that's less important.

Sadly I have come across a fair number of people who teach for a living but are going through the motions, delivering one lesson after another in a transactional way. Worse, not having the belief in their pupil that they could achieve more. (or, not having enough knowledge to help them fly higher. or the freedom from ego, to let a pupil go when they'd reached their personal limit with them and they were ready for more advanced instruction ) this makes me really sad. I can think of about half a dozen people I know like this at the moment.

 

[milliepops]

i thought of another one. I find a trainer who has struggled with stuff themselves to be much more useful than someone who is a complete natural and can't relate to the difficulties I'm encountering.

I had SJ lessons with a pro rider who taught on the side, and the whole thing came so naturally to her that she really couldn't help me with my SJ nerves, or my difficulty seeing a stride. It made me feel utterly inadequate, we made no progress and I am pretty sure she got rather frustrated with me too.
I took the same horse to another pro who also taught, and he absolutely nailed it, knew the nerves I felt, and had dozens of exercises and strategies to deal with them as well as a good deal of patience to teach me technique I went from crying after lessons to feeling effective and confident around a 1.15 course.

 

[palo1]

i couldn't agree more palo.
I bang on about it all the time but it's because i know so many people who have been stymied by either ineffective, ungenuine or downright shonky teaching. And I know what a transformative effect a good lesson with the right person can have on you.

Safety to try, fail, try again and help someone find the way through a problem is a big one. genuine desire to see the pupil succeed is another. then ability to impart information in a meaningful way. I think qualifications are less important - a person can be a great teacher without having any, though that's not to say that they are not useful because having a range of approaches is potentially valuable l and I think a more "coaching" style that's promoted these days is probably more versatile.

track record, is quite a big one for me. I want to go to someone who has a track record of producing riders like me with horses like mine, to a level that I aspire to. It's reassuring if they've done it well themselves too because when it comes to planning for competition, you know they've walked the walk and fully appreciate what you are attempting. but for the abstract bits of training, that's less important.

Sadly I have come across a fair number of people who teach for a living but are going through the motions, delivering one lesson after another in a transactional way. Worse, not having the belief in their pupil that they could achieve more. (or, not having enough knowledge to help them fly higher. or the freedom from ego, to let a pupil go when they'd reached their personal limit with them and they were ready for more advanced instruction ) this makes me really sad. I can think of about half a dozen people I know like this at the moment.

I just agree with everything you said here!! I wish I could find a trainer/coach at the moment - I do want someone who has got that track record and I know that is genuinely meaningful as I often have students who ask me about mine. It is important for someone who is investing in training to know that their trainer/teacher has succeeded in that area themselves and done the necessary problem solving to do that. I am just not sure about the culture of equestrianism where some trainers appear to live off their riding achievements rather than any merit in teaching/training. Not sure what I will do with my little mare tbh wrt to trainers. I was utterly blessed with my last trainer - she gave me such a brilliant start with my older horse; I haven't forgotten a single lesson and I know that the quality of that training enabled me to get over many years of 'failure' and loss of confidence. I will ask her for help again but she may not be in a position to help me sadly. Good training/teaching is, as you say, transformational.

 

[Chippers1]

I've just read through all of this, it's such a good thread.

I also came from a non horsey background, begged my parents for riding lessons which I got for my 11th birthday then I was a once a week rider, doing pony days etc for a year or so until I moved to my current riding school (/livery yard now) which then took over my life! I spent pretty much all holidays there, friends with the liveries and desperate for my own pony. I was chief groom at shows and would take the photos but still couldn't get my own. I've always been massively independent (and from an early age learnt not to rely on people..but that's a whole other story...) so I would cycle the 20 mins to the yard and be gone all day. I had a paid lesson a week but also worked for free rides plus as I am tiny I would ride the little ponies before lessons to get some energy out of them.

I forever held on to a dream of working not with horses but for, I wanted to be an equine nutritionist after reading about the job in a magazine plus the owning a pony dream! I went to university to do a horsey degree (mum and stepdad massively disapproved - my dad didn't mind ) and in my second year took on the loan of my old pony as his owner had outgrown him. Never had any money but was so happy just to finally have my own!! Eventually Misty was gifted to me so I didn't have the initial cost of buying but I worked really hard at some really s*it jobs, as well as doing a masters at the same time, to be able to pay his livery, even wore after his lami/EMS diagnosis as I then had to cover stable costs rather than just diy field but it was so totally worth it.

Aside from this I suppose my big 'competitive' dream was to compete in a BE80, Misty would have easily done it but being 13hh he wasn't within the height so it was only after he retired that I started thinking about it again and bought Buzz. I've spoken about my confidence issues loads so I won't go into that but I have real issues with how I view myself, I don't think I am a good rider, I don't think I am capable of achieving what I want but I try - it's even been mentioned that when I come back with a rosettes there's always a 'but'!. I've never had loads of money to spare but when I bought my first box last year after lots of saving it was just one step closer to my dream, even if it was the worst looking one in the car park!

Unfortunately when I got a chance to compete in my first BE80 I made a complete pigs ear of it but i'm happy that I got there, I got to that point and though I've had a massive drop in confidence, just before corona hit I jumped an 80 round, clear and most importantly felt confident and happy and had fun!! doing it (as did Buzz!) and that means more to me than any of my other competing dreams. There's always next year I'm also working on my self esteem issues haha

Edit to add: I don't work as a horse nutritionist but I do research around pet nutrition and that is pretty close for me!

 

[JFTDWS]

for many of us I think it's learning from mistakes that makes the difference between blagging something and really fully understanding it.

See I've always argued that a wise man learns from his own mistakes, but one with common sense learns from the mistakes of others.

I think sometimes we undervalue the benefit of watching other people do what we want to do - at all levels - and really analysing their performance. This forum is great for that because you can see beyond the performance into how people manage their horses day to day as well.

It's good to leave your comfort zone, and making mistakes is sometimes necessary - but going into something you're insufficiently prepared for is not justified as a learning experience, if there's a reasonable chance your horse will suffer by it (and I mean emotionally more than physically). Sometimes I think the "we all learn by making mistakes" mentality leads to people being a bit reckless, or just plain stupid. Not necessarily in the sense of doing dangerous things, but doing things which just aren't fair on their horses.

 

[milliepops]

See I've always argued that a wise man learns from his own mistakes, but one with common sense learns from the mistakes of others.

I think sometimes we undervalue the benefit of watching other people do what we want to do - at all levels - and really analysing their performance. This forum is great for that because you can see beyond the performance into how people manage their horses day to day as well.

It's good to leave your comfort zone, and making mistakes is sometimes necessary - but going into something you're insufficiently prepared for is not justified as a learning experience, if there's a reasonable chance your horse will suffer by it (and I mean emotionally more than physically). Sometimes I think the "we all learn by making mistakes" mentality leads to people being a bit reckless, or just plain stupid. Not necessarily in the sense of doing dangerous things, but doing things which just aren't fair on their horses.

ahh yes. Absolutely.
I meant it in a narrower sense I guess. not making the mistake of overfacing your horse with a course of jumps, or doing something before one or other of you is ready. those are definitely unwise mistakes to be learning from But the only way to learn things like feel or the timing of aids is to either be so bloody lucky it comes naturally to you and you instantly just *have* it instinctively,
or
to fluff it, get it wrong, get it right, get it wrong again, figure out what you did differently when it was right, try that again, miss the mark, try again, get it right, get it right, got it right! got it, hurrah!

 

[JFTDWS]

ahh yes. Absolutely.
I meant it in a narrower sense I guess. not making the mistake of overfacing your horse with a course of jumps, or doing something before one or other of you is ready. those are definitely unwise mistakes to be learning from But the only way to learn things like feel or the timing of aids is to either be so bloody lucky it comes naturally to you and you instantly just *have* it instinctively,
or
to fluff it, get it wrong, get it right, get it wrong again, figure out what you did differently when it was right, try that again, miss the mark, try again, get it right, get it right, got it right! got it, hurrah!

Oh you can't learn feel from watching, for sure. But you should be doing it over a pole / tiny fence in a low key environment, or while asking for a reasonable request of your horse in a dressage sense - this is harder to quantify but I see people asking horses to work to an aesthetic / level the horse isn't capable of, without the background to develop to that level - it's easier to visualise what I mean by saying you should be learning to see a stride to a pole and not by ragging your horse over a 3' fence and missing every time.

 

[tda]

I don't think I had any big dreams as such, I never had the guts/confidence really.
However I have done all sorts with my ponies over the years, some hilights that still make me smile are riding in the ridden dales class at the GYS, cantering past the big grandstand , probably on the wrong leg, but grinning like a loon.
An unexpected 1st place in dressage at a breed show.
Too many more to mention. But I've enjoyed them all

 

[Brownmare]

I am finding this thread fascinating, and a real eye opener for me. My first thought was that no, I haven't achieved my riding dreams but as I have read on it has made me think of what I have achieved and what is really important to me and I have realised that my dreams now aren't actually what I thought they were and that I have an exciting time ahead of me with my dreams in sight!

I was very lucky as a child to get my first pony at the age of 8 after my Mum inherited a house with land, but Mum and I were the only horsey ones in the family and Mum refused to tow the trailer so if I wanted to compete or go to a PC rally I had to drag the whole family along with me as Dad had to drive and my brother was too young to be left at home. As you can imagine I ended up feeling guilty and selfish if I did too much and that mentality seems to have ingrained itself into my brain and I always think of competitions as an occasional treat!

My dream as a child was to compete at Badminton and I would have happily made horses my career but my parents pushed me towards something more academic. As a compromise I had a year out working with horses before I went to University and was lucky enough to land a job with a former Chef D'Equipe of the junior eventing team. She had since moved to dressage from eventing but I learnt so so much from her and can honestly say she changed my life.

After Uni I still didn't compete much and life got in the way of riding, as it does! The academic career left me cold and I ended up farming with no time or money to spare. I have always had bargain basement horses, mostly taking on other people's mistakes. I have never paid more than £2000 for a horse and half were under £1000! And so, more by accident than design, I developed a love and fascination for solving problems, understanding the biomechanics and psychology of my horses and working through their various issues to bring them out the other side as happy, comfortable, sane rides.

All the while I had been measuring my progress by my (lack of) competition success and I have really only just realised that making broken horses whole again is a far better and more satisfying dream than collecting a dusty wall of rosettes in the tack room. Last year I bought a rising 2yr old and I am looking forward to taking his training right the way through with (hopefully) no mistakes / fears / hangups to undo along the way and I'm excited to see how far we can get and all the different options we can try.

Thank you to everyone who has commented on this thread for helping me realise that dreams can change without you even being aware of it! The thought of the stress and pressure of the route to Badminton horrifies me now, and the idea of seeing my baby horse calm and confident under saddle is so exciting: the world is our oyster! (Oh and I do have another project pony to keep me busy until baby horse is ready to ride... and beyond ?)

 

[milliepops]

Oh you can't learn feel from watching, for sure. But you should be doing it over a pole / tiny fence in a low key environment, or while asking for a reasonable request of your horse in a dressage sense - this is harder to quantify but I see people asking horses to work to an aesthetic / level the horse isn't capable of, without the background to develop to that level - it's easier to visualise what I mean by saying you should be learning to see a stride to a pole and not by ragging your horse over a 3' fence and missing every time.

yup totally agree. the example I had in my mind about learning from mistakes was the aids for flying changes (most recent very hard won gain). i could ride changes on a horse that knew the aid. I could teach a change for a horse that found them easy naturally. Could I get my other horse to come through correctly instead of the resolutely late behind thing she offered? not without failing a lot of times. I don't think that was detrimental to her in any way. but it took me riding a lot of correct ones on the easy horse, then trying to ride the same aids on the late behind horse, breaking the changes on the easy horse, getting in a right pickle then figuring out that my timing was actually off by a microsecond, fixed the easy horse, fixed the late horse. it's muscle memory now but i would never have grasped that tiny detail without those mistakes, because it was only by cocking up the easy horse that I noticed what was really happening.

NB. both horses were ready for changes I think I was too.

 

[little_critter]

i couldn't agree more palo.
I bang on about it all the time but it's because i know so many people who have been stymied by either ineffective, ungenuine or downright shonky teaching. And I know what a transformative effect a good lesson with the right person can have on you.

Safety to try, fail, try again and help someone find the way through a problem is a big one. genuine desire to see the pupil succeed is another. then ability to impart information in a meaningful way. I think qualifications are less important - a person can be a great teacher without having any, though that's not to say that they are not useful because having a range of approaches is potentially valuable l and I think a more "coaching" style that's promoted these days is probably more versatile.

track record, is quite a big one for me. I want to go to someone who has a track record of producing riders like me with horses like mine, to a level that I aspire to. It's reassuring if they've done it well themselves too because when it comes to planning for competition, you know they've walked the walk and fully appreciate what you are attempting. but for the abstract bits of training, that's less important.

Sadly I have come across a fair number of people who teach for a living but are going through the motions, delivering one lesson after another in a transactional way. Worse, not having the belief in their pupil that they could achieve more. (or, not having enough knowledge to help them fly higher. or the freedom from ego, to let a pupil go when they'd reached their personal limit with them and they were ready for more advanced instruction ) this makes me really sad. I can think of about half a dozen people I know like this at the moment.

I think I might try a different approach to trainers when we get back out again. I had been having lessons with a lovely lady who taught in a classical way but was not at all interested in competitions. I topped up with a few group clinics with a good dressage trainer.
Much as I like and appreciate the classical lessons, it's not pushing me in the direction in which I wish to go. (although I do appreciate the good grounding it gave me). I'll have 1:1 lessons with the dressage trainer with a view to pushing on with our progress.

I also need to nail the jumping somehow, I've never done enough jumping to class myself as any good, and my current horse has done an unknown amount of jumping (was a show horse before me) so is green.
We need to get a good run of jumping sessions in order to get that confidence (at the dinky heights) that we can then build on. In the last year we have jumped so infrequently that we were essentially starting from square 1 each time.

 

[JFTDWS]

NB. both horses were ready for changes I think I was too.

Absolutely. But because of ^ that, I don't regard trying and failing to get a clean change as a mistake. That's just training.

A mistake would be asking your unprepared horse to change, pushing it, blowing its mind and spending 3 months to get back to where you started.

Knowing which one of these categories you fall into takes skill and experience, and I think is what some of the old masters mean when they talk about "tact". But I worry about people doing variations on the latter


eta - here's a personal story about a total tact failure...

Last year I jumped off my horse like a twat and buggered my ankle. I was riding again in a few days but it was ludicrously painful to keep it in the stirrup long / two point was a joke. However, because I'd literally set up a nice new jump paddock the day before I did it, and knew I only had a month before the paddock was grazed again and unavailable, I took some horses into it. I rode Dae in there and it was painful to jump and I wasn't particularly balanced, but he gets on with the job so it was fine.

I took Skye in there to do the same and completely upset her by not being balanced over fences, when she wasn't established jumping at all, and clearly found an ineffective rider very stressful. I spent a fair bit of last summer unpicking that mistake...

Missing at a fence in training is technically a mistake, but it's an unavoidable part of life.

Making a really poor judgement about what your horse is ready for, or capable of is totally avoidable, and it's not OK to chalk that up as a learning experience...

*heads off to lash self with cat-o-nine-tails for my sins*

 

[milliepops]

I think I might try a different approach to trainers when we get back out again. I had been having lessons with a lovely lady who taught in a classical way but was not at all interested in competitions. I topped up with a few group clinics with a good dressage trainer.
Much as I like and appreciate the classical lessons, it's not pushing me in the direction in which I wish to go. (although I do appreciate the good grounding it gave me). I'll have 1:1 lessons with the dressage trainer with a view to pushing on with our progress.

I also need to nail the jumping somehow, I've never done enough jumping to class myself as any good, and my current horse has done an unknown amount of jumping (was a show horse before me) so is green.
We need to get a good run of jumping sessions in order to get that confidence (at the dinky heights) that we can then build on. In the last year we have jumped so infrequently that we were essentially starting from square 1 each time.

LC I think maybe you've identified your issue. if you want to ride in competitions you probably need someone who shares and supports your goal to do that.
Having an interest in training your horse classically "just" for the sake of it is a wonderful thing and probably something you can do concurrently without an issue but if you are frustrated by a lack of competition-type progress i think a change of focus is probably worth a shot.

 

[little_critter]

yup totally agree. the example I had in my mind about learning from mistakes was the aids for flying changes (most recent very hard won gain). i could ride changes on a horse that knew the aid. I could teach a change for a horse that found them easy naturally. Could I get my other horse to come through correctly instead of the resolutely late behind thing she offered? not without failing a lot of times. I don't think that was detrimental to her in any way. but it took me riding a lot of correct ones on the easy horse, then trying to ride the same aids on the late behind horse, breaking the changes on the easy horse, getting in a right pickle then figuring out that my timing was actually off by a microsecond, fixed the easy horse, fixed the late horse. it's muscle memory now but i would never have grasped that tiny detail without those mistakes, because it was only by cocking up the easy horse that I noticed what was really happening.

NB. both horses were ready for changes I think I was too.

I've developed a bit of a 'oh just have a crack at it' approach after 2 horses with health issues. My dream is to ride BD.
Normally I'd go out unaff till we felt pretty good, then have a go at BD. That was the plan with the last 2 horses....never got there.
So this one, I just went straight out to BD MyQuest (still not quite 'proper' BD but a step closer). It was a prelim test, I knew he was easy to take out and about, the worst that could happen would be a bad score.
We actually did ok.
Then when I was grumbling that I've not been able to move up to Novice, several friends said why not give it a go?
It wasn't a massive ask for the horse, our mediums aren't quite medium but I didn't feel I would do him any damage by having a crack at it. Again, the worst that could happen was a bad score. Actually my Novice score was nearly identical to my Prelim score.

Now I wouldn't do the same with jumping or xc because there is more potential to have an accident, knock your horses confidence or knock your own confidence.

So sometimes you need to just have a crack at something, if you wait to be perfect at the previous level / height you will never feel good enough to step up.

 

[milliepops]

yeah I recognise the "have a go" approach because I had years and years of doing a couple of shows then horse having a field injury and the rest of the year being taken up by vets visits and rehab. I affiliated the next one from her first show onwards and am fairly gung ho about setting myself a challenge and going for it. the biggest hurdle being my self belief or confidence.

i think that's a bit different to what JFTD is referring to though, i think probably lots of us have witnessed, at all levels, horse and rider combinations that just don't look ready for their challenge in one way or another (lack of control, lack of safety, lack of consideration for the horse's wellbeing and increased chance of accidents being a few examples) and this is probably more evident *at shows* in the jumping disciplines.

 

[JFTDWS]

Now I wouldn't do the same with jumping or xc because there is more potential to have an accident, knock your horses confidence or knock your own confidence.

So sometimes you need to just have a crack at something, if you wait to be perfect at the previous level / height you will never feel good enough to step up.

I tend to say to people it's fine to have a crack at a higher level / movement in dressafe*, because if your horse isn't entirely ready, you can steer round and not upset the horse by doing a mediocre job. It's a flat arena - the worst you can do, unless you really lay into your horse with pressure, is to post a bad score. Have at it.

Jumping and other disciplines (polox is one, but there are many others) are generally less forgiving. You need to push out of your comfort zone, certainly, but it's important to have your basics sorted and for your horse to be really, really confident at your current level before have a crack at the next level.


*That's the most appropriate typo I've ever encountered.

 

[little_critter]

yeah I recognise the "have a go" approach because I had years and years of doing a couple of shows then horse having a field injury and the rest of the year being taken up by vets visits and rehab. I affiliated the next one from her first show onwards and am fairly gung ho about setting myself a challenge and going for it. the biggest hurdle being my self belief or confidence.

i think that's a bit different to what JFTD is referring to though, i think probably lots of us have witnessed, at all levels, horse and rider combinations that just don't look ready for their challenge in one way or another (lack of control, lack of safety, lack of consideration for the horse's wellbeing and increased chance of accidents being a few examples) and this is probably more evident *at shows* in the jumping disciplines.

Absolutely - I totally agree with this. If anything I probably err too much on the wrong side of that and tend to keep too far within the horses comfort zone, therefore never pushing to learn something new or challenge the horse to do better. So I guess me 'having a crack' at something is already long after the period when many other riders would feel it's time to push on to the next challenge. So what feels gung ho to me is actually slow progress for many others!