marmalade76
Well-Known Member
Yes, I cried more tears when I lost my horse of a lifetime than I have for any human I've lost so far.
Sorry for your loss xxx
Are horses members of the family like dogs are?
- Thread starter blitznbobs
- Start date
Yes, I cried more tears when I lost my horse of a lifetime than I have for any human I've lost so far.
Sorry for your loss xxx
Denali
Well-Known Member
They are but it’s different. I’m selling my horse so she has a the same life that I couldn’t afford being over seas. Doing what’s good for a horse, even if it’s selling, means they’re treated like family. The idea that one would keep them forever is nice but not always practical. And like @ycbm said, if horses didn’t come up for sale, y’all would have your oldies in the fields.
Putting any of my pets down be a horse, cat or dog, took a chunk out of my heart.
Putting any of my pets down be a horse, cat or dog, took a chunk out of my heart.
shanti
Well-Known Member
I treat all my animals as pets and have an emotional attachment to them all. When one of my ducks was nearly taken by a fox I was hysterical, and people told me to calm down because ''it's only a duck, it's not like a dog or horse'' they couldn't understand that all my animals are family.
In saying that, I'm under no illusion that they all view me differently. My horses tolerate me because I bring them food, they don't love me, but I think they feel a sense of safety because I tend to their needs. My ducks and geese don't like me at all and always run away from me even though I hand reared them, to them I will always be a strange predator who gives them food and lets them out of the coop every morning. My dogs love me, they are always happy to see me, but then, they are happy to see anyone really so maybe they just love people in general. I still love them all equally though and none of them owe me anything.
In saying that, I'm under no illusion that they all view me differently. My horses tolerate me because I bring them food, they don't love me, but I think they feel a sense of safety because I tend to their needs. My ducks and geese don't like me at all and always run away from me even though I hand reared them, to them I will always be a strange predator who gives them food and lets them out of the coop every morning. My dogs love me, they are always happy to see me, but then, they are happy to see anyone really so maybe they just love people in general. I still love them all equally though and none of them owe me anything.
Michen
Well-Known Member
I hope one day everyone on this thread finds that horse or horses that IS part of the family, no matter what.
There is something about having a partnership like that with a horse that to me far outweighs anything a dog could offer.
I find it interesting that people think their dog couldn't live without them but their horse could. Most well adjusted dogs I know are happy wherever/whoever they are with, granted they are of course more bonded to you but I don't think there any many that couldn't form the same attached with another human in time... perhaps we just like to think they wouldn't!
I thought Boggle was fairly indifferent to me, other than recognizing me as his human slave and worshipper, until he spent 10 days or so travelling from the USA to the UK. I will never, ever forget the expression on his face or the moments afterwards when the ramp dropped and he saw me when he arrived in Colorado. He's never quite looked at me like that before and probably never will again but it was so special.
There is something about having a partnership like that with a horse that to me far outweighs anything a dog could offer.
I find it interesting that people think their dog couldn't live without them but their horse could. Most well adjusted dogs I know are happy wherever/whoever they are with, granted they are of course more bonded to you but I don't think there any many that couldn't form the same attached with another human in time... perhaps we just like to think they wouldn't!
I thought Boggle was fairly indifferent to me, other than recognizing me as his human slave and worshipper, until he spent 10 days or so travelling from the USA to the UK. I will never, ever forget the expression on his face or the moments afterwards when the ramp dropped and he saw me when he arrived in Colorado. He's never quite looked at me like that before and probably never will again but it was so special.
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Chippers1
Well-Known Member
Buzz is part of the family 
my OH wanted him to be part of our engagement and he'll be at the wedding too. He's just a bit big to get in my flat and I'm not sure the cats would approve
He's not cuddly at all but he looks out for me and comes over in the field when i'm there and I don't give him treats when I catch him either so not food related. When we were at camp earlier this year and he was stabled in a strange place he was on constant look out for me and would whicker at me much more than normal so I hope that means he likes me back As with my previous pony he has a home for life and if he becomes un-rideable then so be it, he can live out his days with me just as my old pony did.
My hamster was such a great pet, I like to think he had some kind of hamster-y affection as only hamsters do. He would pop out when I called him and would stand on his little back legs to have a chat with me. I posted about him on here when he had to be PTS as I was so upset, he was such a good little guy and I miss him a lot!
my OH wanted him to be part of our engagement and he'll be at the wedding too. He's just a bit big to get in my flat and I'm not sure the cats would approve He's not cuddly at all but he looks out for me and comes over in the field when i'm there and I don't give him treats when I catch him either so not food related. When we were at camp earlier this year and he was stabled in a strange place he was on constant look out for me and would whicker at me much more than normal so I hope that means he likes me back
As with my previous pony he has a home for life and if he becomes un-rideable then so be it, he can live out his days with me just as my old pony did.My hamster was such a great pet, I like to think he had some kind of hamster-y affection as only hamsters do. He would pop out when I called him and would stand on his little back legs to have a chat with me. I posted about him on here when he had to be PTS as I was so upset, he was such a good little guy and I miss him a lot!
Boughtabay
Well-Known Member
Agree with this. My gelding is attached to me and the (non-horsey) OH and though I’ve been getting him handled by others here and there to try and make him a good citizen & he sees a lot of passers by in his field who he mugs for fuss, there’s something really heartwarming about him being so obviously attached to us. Having a horse choose you as the person they trust and look for is such a big feeling.
The OH didn’t quite get it until we took baby horse to his first arena hire. Horse called after him when he left to start sorting the trailer ready to go home & was absolutely overjoyed when we got back to the box and OH was there waiting for him, even the OH could tell the fuss was about him
The flip side is I can’t even think about any of my horses (or dogs) who have passed without a lump in my throat. ETA - no matter how many years pass
ycbm
Einstein would be proud of my Insanity...
I'm not sure I wish the pain of losing them on my worst enemy. I know you've been through it with Basil and loved like that again with Boggle, but i think I'll be happy with a less intense (not unloving, just less intense) relationship with my new one.
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scats
Well-Known Member
I’ve only seen my dad cry once and that was the day we said goodbye to my first pony. He said it was harder than losing both his parents.
Titchy Reindeer
Well-Known Member
After more thought, the horses are part of the family.
Little Madam because I've got a card saying so. It's signed Auntie Sister, Uncle Despicable ex-BIL and cousin Fluff-Butt (the dog).
The Old Lady because I don't allow just anyone to fart in my face on a regular basis (she has no manners!).
I'm technically an independent adult, but my sister and parents all know how much the animals mean to me and so see them as part of the family. Everyone gets a a Christmas present, I do the same for my sister's animals.
Little Madam because I've got a card saying so. It's signed Auntie Sister, Uncle Despicable ex-BIL and cousin Fluff-Butt (the dog).
The Old Lady because I don't allow just anyone to fart in my face on a regular basis (she has no manners!).
I'm technically an independent adult, but my sister and parents all know how much the animals mean to me and so see them as part of the family. Everyone gets a a Christmas present, I do the same for my sister's animals.
Gallop_Away
Well-Known Member
Well said. There truly is something special when you form that partnership with a horse.
Gallop_Away
Well-Known Member
It is the ultimate price we pay for the privilege of having these special horses on our lives. I can understand wanting to protect yourself from that pain again.
Barton Bounty
Just simply loving life with Orbi 🥰
That look you got from Boggle is the same look I got from BB when I visited him at the vet school after colic. He was just ecstatic and he oozed just pure love
SO1
Well-Known Member
That is how I feel about Homey and next pony I want it to be different, still friends but perhaps not so obsessive. I don't want to be so sad like this again. People used to describe us as like an old married couple and he used to pine when I went on holiday.
Perhaps it is better if they are less bonded as if for any reason they need another home or to be looked after by someone else it is easier for them to adjust. There is no guarantee that you will outlive your pet or be able to be their primary carer all the time.
Perhaps it is better if they are less bonded as if for any reason they need another home or to be looked after by someone else it is easier for them to adjust. There is no guarantee that you will outlive your pet or be able to be their primary carer all the time.
marmalade76
Well-Known Member
That look you got from Boggle is the same look I got from BB when I visited him at the vet school after colic. He was just ecstatic and he oozed just pure love
I had a similar experience with a horse I didn't even like. After I had children I used to keep mine out all year round on hills (right next door to the Prescott Hill Climb), there was an old TB there who belonged to someone else and myself & his owner would take it in turns to check & feed them. He was a git, he kicked me once on my birthday when I went out to feed him and had a few other near misses so as you can imagine, we weren't the best of mates. He'd had a hard life, he had nasty scars and had been pin fired, he couldn't be stabled because he weaved like a lunatic.
He had a touch of colic one day and his owner had the vet out. All was fine for a couple more days then I went up to feed them and he was down in the field but "sitting up in bed". He was SO pleased to see me, like "thank god you're here!" This really choked me up. He'd obviously been down for a while, he'd scraped the ground trying to get up and his legs had swollen. I called his owner and she called the vet. In this time, he seemed to give up, he laid his head down, it felt like "you're here now, I can relax". By the time the vet arrived, I think he was almost gone.
Barton Bounty
Just simply loving life with Orbi 🥰
I always say they do have feelings
Annagain
Well-Known Member
All my horses have been family to me but they're not part of "the family" because my OH doesn't really have anything to do with them, my parents don't come to see them etc whereas the dog spends a lot of time with them if we're both in work. The dog is more part of the wider family in that sense. I feel the same about them though. The only one I have ever sold was Charlie and I cried for a fortnight about that. I have no intention to ever sell another. I probably should have sold Archie 16 years ago when it was clear he couldn't really do what I wanted to do but he's still here, draining my pocket but filling my heart. Every day he whinnies as soon as he sees me. It's probably as much about the food but he doesn't whinny at anyone else even though they feed him sometimes.
I do see the argument that a horse's job is different from a dog's for most of us though and think there's much more of a stigma attached to rehoming a dog than there is about selling a horse so I can understand why others feel differently.
I do see the argument that a horse's job is different from a dog's for most of us though and think there's much more of a stigma attached to rehoming a dog than there is about selling a horse so I can understand why others feel differently.
Caol Ila
Well-Known Member
I should caveat this by saying that I have never owned a dog. I've lived with a couple though, owned by flatmates.
I never really thought of the horse as a 'pet' in the way cats, fish, and snakes have been pets. The relationship with the horse feels bigger than any relationship I've had with other animals, or, quite frankly, a lot of humans. In a way, there isn't a word for it. You're working partners, friends, family, all rolled into one. Because I ride them, the communication and trust -- both ways -- needs to go beyond any I have with other critters, and a lot of humans. Perhaps people with working dogs experience that too. The fish, not so much.
I never really thought of the horse as a 'pet' in the way cats, fish, and snakes have been pets. The relationship with the horse feels bigger than any relationship I've had with other animals, or, quite frankly, a lot of humans. In a way, there isn't a word for it. You're working partners, friends, family, all rolled into one. Because I ride them, the communication and trust -- both ways -- needs to go beyond any I have with other critters, and a lot of humans. Perhaps people with working dogs experience that too. The fish, not so much.
Michen
Well-Known Member
That’s fair and I understand as the the thought of anything happening to Boggle before his time sends me into a genuine panic. Obviously most likely because of what happened to Basil.
But it’s a complete privilege to have a horse you feel like this about. So I’ll continue to adore him knowing full well how horrendous it will be when the inevitable happens, but also knowing it’s totally worth it (to me).