Bloody whelks. Bloody self pity. Bloody tomatohead.

Starzaan said:
WHY DOES NOBODY LOVE ME IN A MADLESBIANY WAY?!?!?!?!

NOBODY wants a sausage....
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nonono! you've got it all wrong... it's because they want a sausage that they don't love you in a madlesbiany kind of way...

i think? :confused:

no, that's a lie... i don't think, I am blonde, and deep as a puddle too! ;);):D:D

on the otherhand... my colleague sent me a link or two this afternoon and 4 of us spent the afternoon peeeing ourselves and splurting tea over our keyboards.... http://www.tummyfluff.co.uk/fun/humour/boyname.htm
http://www.tummyfluff.co.uk/fun/humour/girlname.htm
 
Oh MrsM you're so WISE like an OWL.



And sadly I sealed all the whelk shells shut with lemon wax, so it can't have been them.....



I know with absolute certainty that I'm going to make a royal tit out of myself tomorrow.

Joy unbounded.
 
jenhunt said:
nonono! you've got it all wrong... it's because they want a sausage that they don't love you in a madlesbiany kind of way...

i think? :confused:

no, that's a lie... i don't think, I am blonde, and deep as a puddle too! ;);):D:D

on the otherhand... my colleague sent me a link or two this afternoon and 4 of us spent the afternoon peeeing ourselves and splurting tea over our keyboards.... http://www.tummyfluff.co.uk/fun/humour/boyname.htm
http://www.tummyfluff.co.uk/fun/humour/girlname.htm
Click to expand...



Jen... thank you a squillion times... mine is:

"Robyn - Sexy with an arse to die for."




I feel MUCH better now.
 
Starzaan said:
Jen... thank you a squillion times... mine is:

"Robyn - Sexy with an arse to die for."




I feel MUCH better now.
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mine is either

"Jen - accident prone, especially around men she fancies."
or....







"Jennifer - Huge breasts, should shave her legs more often. "


unfortunately either way is true :eek: :eek:


and OH is "Peter - Likes sheep more than girls, will probably end up married to a relative" PMSL!! :D:D:D and no i'm not his relative! :D
 
Dear Starzaan,

I hope you feel better soon, and please, pretty please with a cherry on top let is know how the FF's visit goes or share your morphine as I'm relying on this thread to help sooth the pain 2 weeks of constant rain and job rejetions.

JenHunt - very funny thanks! Mine isn't all that bad I guess... :-/
 
jenhunt said:
nonono! you've got it all wrong... it's because they want a sausage that they don't love you in a madlesbiany kind of way...

i think? :confused:

no, that's a lie... i don't think, I am blonde, and deep as a puddle too! ;);):D:D

on the otherhand... my colleague sent me a link or two this afternoon and 4 of us spent the afternoon peeeing ourselves and splurting tea over our keyboards.... http://www.tummyfluff.co.uk/fun/humour/boyname.htm
http://www.tummyfluff.co.uk/fun/humour/girlname.htm
Click to expand...
MY NAME ISNT THERE!

*cries with despair*
 
Rest the brain for awhile, give your stomach a rest from the sausages and whelks. Give up all thoughts of FF and such like for at least a couple of days. Then well rested write list of what career brings in the most money and go after a man that's in that career (Brill):D:D:D:D:D:D
 
"Alexandra - Popular but very loud, sometimes forgets to bathe"
Hahahahahahahahahahahaha :D
My OH is : Karen.....Id get booted off the forum if I wrote what it says! lol! x
 
Prince Phillip would have taken a sausage!!!!


Well I did it, I've done almost a whole day out of bed wafting about like a druggy idiot with FF... and he was completely wonderful as always.

Nothing remotely interesting happened other than him being delightful and lovely, and my friend's meathead dog trying to eat the smoke as he was burning shoes on...

No declarations of undying love, no welly dancing, no face licking, no morags wafting, no collapsing (although I now feel like I've been hit by a train and have had a severe telling off courtesty of the consultant!!)

Mechanic still hasn't bothered to come and see me... so I think a little bit of dumping is in order! Oh dear...


I'm off to watch the morphine squishing into my veins... yumyum yum


and TG - thank you so much! I just got your card, and it made me all sobby again! xxxxx
 
This is what I like about this girl, she really is a high class sort, was going to say good taste as the royal stuff, if Katie Middleton can do it, so can Starzaan. Then goes and let herself down with the FF and Mechanic. How about Vets? Horsewise that is. Getting rid of Katie Price pink dress and the slinky black one with chicken feathers top and bottom, as they don't seem to bring you much luck, so will be scouring the Charity Shops BIG TIME next few weeks.:D:D:D:D
 
Actually I'm jealous, as I'd love to get my rear end in bed, but have a meal to cook and a pile of ironing sitting there just looking at me, the more I look at it, the more it seems to grow, feeling faint:p:p:p:o:o:o:o:o:o
 
My rear end is very much back in bed.... sadly about ten minutes after the FF left my legs finally gave way and I ended up being pushed around the yard in the big wheelbarrow by my lovely friend Ed while I bossed him around and demanded to be taken into the field to cuddle my horsies... he only nearly tipped me out a few times :D

I ended up having to be carried back into the house - not easy when you're as muddy and giggling as much as I was (and I may have been trying to make life difficult for Tedward following the near death experience in the wheelbarrow...)

I am now shaking like a bitch, and my legs are all jellyfied... SUCH a good look. Thinking that was just about my most stupid idea. So I am all tucked up in bed AGAIN watching Death Race, and darling Ed has been allowed to go back to live his own life for a few hours before taking me to be pushed around in the wheelbarrow again in the morning....

Bless him! MUCH MORE ATTENTIVE than the bloody mechanic.

PAH.
 
jenhunt said:
......on the otherhand... my colleague sent me a link or two this afternoon and 4 of us spent the afternoon peeeing ourselves and splurting tea over our keyboards.... http://www.tummyfluff.co.uk/fun/humour/boyname.htm
http://www.tummyfluff.co.uk/fun/humour/girlname.htm
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TG you are not alone. Doesn't have my name, OH's name or daughter's name. How boring.
Alternatively it's nice to be members of a more exclusive club

Starzaan I am glad you have had a nice day with FF, now take it easy.
 
Starzaan said:
You're all mean.

I'm SO awake.

All kinds of awake.

Just me leggies are a bit wobblesome...
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