Cheeky/ridiculous posts you see on Facebook.

Toad605

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Looking for a horse-mad teenager or adult to help look after our horses and help out around the yard, e.g. poo picking, grooming, and to also come to shows occasionally, these shows are around the country, and some of them are overnight.
Person needs to be reliable, use their initiative, be able to work alone. This person should also be willing to work and be confident around horses. Must be able to drive, has to be available on weekends and possibly some week days.
This is volunteer work, however there is an opportunity to ride.

Based in Orpington, no children please!
Pm me or ***********, for more details.
 

miss_c

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Looking for a horse-mad teenager or adult to help look after our horses and help out around the yard, e.g. poo picking, grooming, and to also come to shows occasionally, these shows are around the country, and some of them are overnight.
Person needs to be reliable, use their initiative, be able to work alone. This person should also be willing to work and be confident around horses. Must be able to drive, has to be available on weekends and possibly some week days.
This is volunteer work, however there is an opportunity to ride.

Based in Orpington, no children please!
Pm me or ***********, for more details.

" WANTED - FREE GROOM "

I can't believe how some people have the cheek!
 

Cowpony

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Not cheeky or ridiculous, but this has just popped up on a facebook site in our area, and it's hilarious! I've removed the names to protect the guilty.

Selection of spoilt, wasted homebred field ornaments.
This is an honest advert and all these horses are quality, well bred horses that have been out of work only through lack of time and interest.
xxxxx 7yrs 15.2
Stunning black bitch that is truly vile to handle. She is handy with her teeth and hind legs. She really is a princess and expects you to wait on her hand and foot however she has won quite a bit as a show hack and has amazingly breath taking paces.
yyyyyy 8yrs 15.3
Bay gelding with a cheeky streak. Hates hacking and can buck. However is a fantastic jumper and would suit a rider with guts that understands his desire to have fun rather than take life too seriously. Has in past been on a few outings
zzzzz 8yrs 16.2
Bay gelding lazy at times and can nap but also has a sharp streak. He has a warped sense of humour and generally try’s to be awkward about life. However he has great paces and quite a bit of scope. Would buck like a pig after a fence if you make a mistake. When in regular work he eventually knuckles down and behaves.
aaaaaa 11 years 16.1
He’s called aaaaa for a reason! Loves being kept like a pampered pet and is beautiful to look at. Lovely to ride in the school but has a gutless temperament if you take him out of his surroundings. Has evented but never showed his amazing ability at a competition usually because he was too busy shitting himself about life.
bbbbb 12 years 16.1
Very sensitive and likes a sedate life. Has in the past been ridden by an amateur but not 100% trustworthy. Again nice to school and enjoys a plod round the village but not great in traffic.
All these horses are but completely wasted and deserve a ridden career if someone can put the time in but aren’t for the faint hearted and you MUST be a capable rider. They aren’t lunatics but would all benefit from regular work. Who knows one of them might be a hidden gem?
 

Hazkirbo

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Literally just read this and had to share!!

I am looking for a Gelding 16.h/16.3. Must be sound proof travel, farrier, traffic. Doesn’t need to be an expensive horse. Preferably under 12yrs of age. My Budget is £1,200 with tack included. Sport horse or TB ex racer or just simply a horse who enjoys a bit of Hacking & Jumping. I have had horses all my life. I can give a loving home with full time care and attention. If anybody knows anyone then please pass this message on. (Not interested in Rescue horses from Rescue sites or cobs) Vet & jabs must be up to date.I live in the South East of the UK, 10 miles from Portsmouth. Thank you 🐎🐴🏇

Don’t know what’s worse; what she thinks she can get for that budget, how many miles she’s willing to travel, or the people telling her ‘it’s perfectly achievable’ and everyone that disagrees is a snob😂😂
 

Snowfilly

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Literally just read this and had to share!!

I am looking for a Gelding 16.h/16.3. Must be sound proof travel, farrier, traffic. Doesn’t need to be an expensive horse. Preferably under 12yrs of age. My Budget is £1,200 with tack included. Sport horse or TB ex racer or just simply a horse who enjoys a bit of Hacking & Jumping. I have had horses all my life. I can give a loving home with full time care and attention. If anybody knows anyone then please pass this message on. (Not interested in Rescue horses from Rescue sites or cobs) Vet & jabs must be up to date.I live in the South East of the UK, 10 miles from Portsmouth. Thank you 🐎🐴🏇

Don’t know what’s worse; what she thinks she can get for that budget, how many miles she’s willing to travel, or the people telling her ‘it’s perfectly achievable’ and everyone that disagrees is a snob😂😂

Dunno, I think that one's actually viable. She doesn't say it has to be within 10 miles of where she lives, that's more giving her location, and I think there's a good chance of picking up a only just out of racing horse for that money, which are generally good to shoe and box and would be up to date on jabs.

Agree she won't get a sports horse type with the work done but I wouldn't be suprised if she finds something.
 

holeymoley

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Not cheeky or ridiculous, but this has just popped up on a facebook site in our area, and it's hilarious! I've removed the names to protect the guilty.

Selection of spoilt, wasted homebred field ornaments.
This is an honest advert and all these horses are quality, well bred horses that have been out of work only through lack of time and interest.
xxxxx 7yrs 15.2
Stunning black bitch that is truly vile to handle. She is handy with her teeth and hind legs. She really is a princess and expects you to wait on her hand and foot however she has won quite a bit as a show hack and has amazingly breath taking paces.
yyyyyy 8yrs 15.3
Bay gelding with a cheeky streak. Hates hacking and can buck. However is a fantastic jumper and would suit a rider with guts that understands his desire to have fun rather than take life too seriously. Has in past been on a few outings
zzzzz 8yrs 16.2
Bay gelding lazy at times and can nap but also has a sharp streak. He has a warped sense of humour and generally try’s to be awkward about life. However he has great paces and quite a bit of scope. Would buck like a pig after a fence if you make a mistake. When in regular work he eventually knuckles down and behaves.
aaaaaa 11 years 16.1
He’s called aaaaa for a reason! Loves being kept like a pampered pet and is beautiful to look at. Lovely to ride in the school but has a gutless temperament if you take him out of his surroundings. Has evented but never showed his amazing ability at a competition usually because he was too busy shitting himself about life.
bbbbb 12 years 16.1
Very sensitive and likes a sedate life. Has in the past been ridden by an amateur but not 100% trustworthy. Again nice to school and enjoys a plod round the village but not great in traffic.
All these horses are but completely wasted and deserve a ridden career if someone can put the time in but aren’t for the faint hearted and you MUST be a capable rider. They aren’t lunatics but would all benefit from regular work. Who knows one of them might be a hidden gem?


I like this advert, probably the most honest that’s out there!
 

meleeka

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Literally just read this and had to share!!

I am looking for a Gelding 16.h/16.3. Must be sound proof travel, farrier, traffic. Doesn’t need to be an expensive horse. Preferably under 12yrs of age. My Budget is £1,200 with tack included. Sport horse or TB ex racer or just simply a horse who enjoys a bit of Hacking & Jumping. I have had horses all my life. I can give a loving home with full time care and attention. If anybody knows anyone then please pass this message on. (Not interested in Rescue horses from Rescue sites or cobs) Vet & jabs must be up to date.I live in the South East of the UK, 10 miles from Portsmouth. Thank you 🐎🐴🏇

Don’t know what’s worse; what she thinks she can get for that budget, how many miles she’s willing to travel, or the people telling her ‘it’s perfectly achievable’ and everyone that disagrees is a snob😂😂
Given that Portsmouth isn’t very horsey at all I think. 10 miles is hopeful! Her budget will probably get her a whole load of health problems 🙄
 

Hazkirbo

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Dunno, I think that one's actually viable. She doesn't say it has to be within 10 miles of where she lives, that's more giving her location, and I think there's a good chance of picking up a only just out of racing horse for that money, which are generally good to shoe and box and would be up to date on jabs.

Agree she won't get a sports horse type with the work done but I wouldn't be suprised if she finds something.

£1200 WITH tack? It could be potentially achievable without, but any decent saddle is worth £500 alone.
 

Hazkirbo

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what utter nonsense! I have just paid £50 for one today. An older synthetic but it fits perfectly, is in good condition and s comfortable for the rider.

and how comfortable for the horse? Not a fan of synthetic saddles personally.

I’d love to know how people pick up these bargains!! Horses and tack!

Forgot to add she also stated in the comments she didn’t want one fresh out of racing.
 

Snowfilly

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You can easily buy a good quality 2nd hand saddle for less than £500.

Easily easily! I've got three lovely second hand saddles here, all cost less than £50 from auction and in decent condition although ones got a torn seat so I stuck a cover on it. All English leather, properly positioned stirrup bars and good trees; they all fitted the horses they belonged to. I saw some last month making about £40 on average.

I paid £15 for a John Whitaker bridle, cob size, with reins as the leather had been badly scratched 2 years ago. Perfectly useable. A sale I went to recently had hardly used rugs making between £10-£30 and cottage craft head collars with tags still on for a fiver.

If you didn't care about colours, and your horse was a standard size, I reckon you could get everything you needed for about £150 secondhand. Cheaper if you didn't mind damaged / patched rugs and stuff that needed cleaning like boots and saddle pads. Honestly, tack is scarily cheap second hand and I'm surprised the saddlers can still make a living.
 

Leo Walker

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and how comfortable for the horse? Not a fan of synthetic saddles personally.

I’d love to know how people pick up these bargains!! Horses and tack!

Forgot to add she also stated in the comments she didn’t want one fresh out of racing.

Well as I said it fits perfectly you would assume it was comfortable ;) I was offered an Ideal for £120 but I prefer synthetic as they are lighter.

Cheap saddles and horses are everywhere. You just need to know what you are looking for.
 

electric_circus

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'Come and lead my kids out on their ponies for free' - ponies are small ones, so not even likely to be a ride in it for any gullible fool who agrees to do this!

I am looking for a somebody who loves children and horses and would like to come to [....] to give me a hand when my children ride their ponies.
My children are 3 and 5 and we have our own ponies. They are located in [...]. I would like to go riding once or twice per week in the afternoon (around 4 pm) either in the sand school or in the woods.
The children are not yet independent enough to ride all the time by themselves - at least somebody needs to be near to the pony - they usually ride their ponies at the same time so I would need somebody who takes care of the other child on its pony (leading it or just supervising a bit) while I „work“ with the other child and pony.
Anybody interested/willing to help?
If you like little kids and ponies and have experience with horses and are available in the late afternoon.. let me know!
 

ycbm

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I’d love to know how people pick up these bargains!! Horses and tack!


Browse all the likely sites every day or even several times a day.
Be prepared to act immediately and pay immediately if you find what you think you are looking for.
Be prepared to sell, mothball, retire or shoot, as appropriate, if it turns out wrong. straight away.
Take risks.
For saddles, know what a sound tree and a good fit is.
For horses, know what a good skeleton is and what physical and temperamental problems are likely to be fixable.

I've had tons of bargains over the years following those rules, but it's not for everyone, especially not people looking for a single 'horse for life' or 'best buddy.
 

exracehorse

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Rather sad advert. Poor horse. And asking price is 600 pounds ..... This a heartbreaking sale of my 21yo Irish Gelding Murphy.
I am selling Murphy as a light hack only, due to his arthritis there is nothing else he can do. He does suffer with arthritis in his back end that’s why he is semi retired.
He is a commitment as needs a good feed to keep the weight on and supplement to help with his creaking joints.
I am being completely honest, He will struggle in the winter, but with the right TLC, a balance of living out as much as possible he will tick over nicely. He does nibble sometimes but that’s my fault as I give him too many treats.
 

Pinkvboots

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'Come and lead my kids out on their ponies for free' - ponies are small ones, so not even likely to be a ride in it for any gullible fool who agrees to do this!

I am looking for a somebody who loves children and horses and would like to come to [....] to give me a hand when my children ride their ponies.
My children are 3 and 5 and we have our own ponies. They are located in [...]. I would like to go riding once or twice per week in the afternoon (around 4 pm) either in the sand school or in the woods.
The children are not yet independent enough to ride all the time by themselves - at least somebody needs to be near to the pony - they usually ride their ponies at the same time so I would need somebody who takes care of the other child on its pony (leading it or just supervising a bit) while I „work“ with the other child and pony.
Anybody interested/willing to help?
If you like little kids and ponies and have experience with horses and are available in the late afternoon.. let me know!

What are the chances
 

Hollychops

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That sounds like she is just offloading her old friend as its easier than making the right decision for him. Whats even worse is that she wants paying for it!! Why cant people just do the right thing?

Have to question what the vet has said on him being ridden?
 

exracehorse

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That sounds like she is just offloading her old friend as its easier than making the right decision for him. Whats even worse is that she wants paying for it!! Why cant people just do the right thing?

Have to question what the vet has said on him being ridden?
The original advert on the Facebook horsey site, said ‘not sound from behind’. Then after many responses, it was removed. But still up on preloved.
 
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