Children or horses?

LEC

LEC

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While being nosey about lives - I am intrigued about how much being horsey has affected decisions about children.

I have no desire for children but dream of foals. I know so many horsey people who do not have/want children.

I am just wondering if its the fact that horses are quite a selfish hobby or its because at least you can sell the horse when things get bad!!
 
I never wanted kids, but have now got a 1 year old son. Had 1 horse before and now have 3 - my original horse, a 3 year old and a yearling!

I certainly am still quite selfish when it comes to my horsey time and palm my son off on any willing person! Sometimes wish I didn't have him when I can't ride when I'd like to (don't actually mean it though!)
 
Interesting thread as I always assume it is just me!

I have no maternal instinct at all - now is that because I love my horse, riding / competing and having an adventure type holiday (All of which I could not do with kids) and know it would not be right for me or that I just don't want kids hence I have the time to do the horse thing?????

Either way 100% horses for me (and also would love a foal one day)
 
Never wanted children, always dreamed of foals too :D

Im always being told, my ponies are my substitue for children :rolleyes: at least my ponies dont run up horroundeous phone bills, stay out til all hours, answer you back etc. etc., however, i think children may have been a cheaper option ;)
 
Definately horses and foals over children! They make less noise and mess (even my very messy horse), they eat less (even my very greedy horse), they're less demanding (yep, even my obscenely high maintenance horse) and if all else fails, you can sell up and move to Australia :cool:.
 
Horses and dogs for me, I love my nieces and nephews but its great when they go home! animals are so much easier
 
def horses!! I got married last year and ever since then people spend there time saying 'oh what about a baby?' and in my head i'm always thinking 'oh but i have one! and he's getting a lovely summer coat now!'
 
It is possible to have both ;)

I always said I was never having children when I was younger. I think the thing with horses is it is quite a self absorbed hobby and we can always put things off because "this is the horse that is going to be the one", "we are going to qualify for x" etc. There is never a "right" time!! Now I have 2 little girls that love ponies just as much as I did and that gives me even more horse time :D and I still compete my own.

I have never really had a desire for a foal - it is hard enough to buy a decent one rather than breed a good one and there are far too many people breeding from very mediocre mares.
 
Its a nightmare, I want kids but cant stop worrying on what to do with the boys...I panic that he's going so well it'd be awful to stop and I cant afford for him to be ridden etc But I aint getting no younger so need to get on with it so to speak:o
oh and it'll get my chuffin mother of my back to!
 
My children are my life BUT I didn't want them until I met my husband and then we had two. I stopped horses whist they were growing up (and enjoyed every minute of it). Now my daughter is as horse mad as me. The power you have as a mother is amazing. I have created a monster!
 
Ha ha exactly what smiffyimp said! OH is desperate for kids (well one anyway) and I'm coming round to the idea but want to time it right! Plus need to be able to afford to keep the boys in the manner to which they are accustomed whilst on maternity pay and ideally not have to go back to work full time!
 
A lot of horsey people say they dont want children

I am the opposite, i enjoyed owning and competing my horses until i became married and pregnant with our son, for me a new life was the priority and so i let my horses go on to enjoy new lives elsewhere :)

Do i regret it, nope, i do miss the horses sometimes but i wouldnt change being a mum for the world (and i personally couldnt cope with my photography, horses and a toddler)
 
Oooh fantastic, other people who feel ambivalent about brats. I just cannot fathom it. I already have something which:

a) takes up all my spare time;
b) drives me insane with worry when it hurts itself; and
c) can't clean up its own poo.

What, pray, can a child offer that I don't already have?!
 
horse.
have never felt maternal and in fact have just split up with OH anyway as he couldnt cope with being second to the horses (tried to make him an equal but feeding/looking after them has to be priority doesnt it really).

wont rule it out entirely but will be picking future OH very carefully in future.
 
HotToTrot said:
What, pray, can a child offer that I don't already have?!
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Something amazing that you will never know about unless you have one ! Beleive me, your own child offers a lot, they are your own flesh and blood and the love you have for them is so very strong it sometimes hurts, yes there are tricky bits, but personally i love being a mum.

Everyone is entitled to their own views of course, but calling all children brats just beacuse you dont want one is a bit strong.
 
Toffee_monster said:
Something amazing that you will never know about unless you have one ! Beleive me, your own child offers a lot, they are your own flesh and blood and the love you have for them is so very strong it sometimes hurts, yes there are tricky bits, but personally i love being a mum.

Everyone is entitled to their own views of course, but calling all children brats just beacuse you dont want one is a bit strong.
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I really never wanted children and my son was an accident that I was quite unsure about having, but this is totally true - you'll never understand the love for a child until you have one! It is possible to have both though - I have manged to expand the family by a child and 2 more horses so happier than ever!
 
Had 2 kids when I came back to horses after a very long break. Now have a 3rd (totally unplanned but wouldn't be without him) but OH is horsesy so really not a problem.

I do find that having 3 horsey kids does put me to the back of the queue(sp) when it comes to competing, kids always come first,followed by OH, so its a good job I enjoy the schooling and background work. Kids really appreciate it and I love seeing them out and about with the horses.
 
Faro said:
All of my children have paws/hooves!
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haha brilliant, me too. also, webbed feet (and not just because i live in the Fens!)

I never made a conscious decision to avoid having children, but my biological clock has never gone off, plus i've never had a partner who was desperate for children, so it has never happened. Prob too old now anyway, but I don't mind... having a child because I might regret not having one, when older, sounds a bit mental. I can always try to adopt if I ever feel desperately maternal!
Also... many years ago, I went with a friend to view a horse, in the depths of winter. The woman selling the horse parked her (tiny, can't have been more than a few months old) baby's pram in the middle of the school and proceeded to show the horse off around it, an when the baby started crying (prob cos it was freezing) she began screaming "*********g SHUT UP" every time she circled near the pram. I kid you not.
I was only about 17 but I clearly remember thinking "I NEVER want that to be me..."

another friend went to view a horse and the seller locked her 2 toddlers in a stable while she showed the horse off, ignoring their sobbing etc.
(neither of us bought the horses, btw, we were revolted...)
 
My standard line used to be that I wasn't having kids until I got married. That worked until this time last year when my OH of the past 11 years married me!

Now it is that I will not have kids until we can afford for me to have a horse and a child. My MIL is desperate for me to have them and has said she will come eventing with me to look after said child. I can only assume she has no idea that I think it is entirely normal to get up at 4am to go eventing, and also that she has no understanding of what eventing entails since whichever way you cut it, I can't see how you can possibly go eventing with a child under six months-1year, and all the sleep deprevation etc that goes with it.

I suppose if MIL were to look after the child, and husband were to learn to drive the lorry so I could sleep, it might be do-able...but I am so unconvinced that I am resisting all pressure. Husband wants kids, but not yet. I reckon I have 3 more years before it gets to the 'now or never' decision point....I'll be 32 in September!
 
I'm with SpottedCat on this one. The ONLY way I would have children in the future is if we could afford to have horses as well.
 
I work with children and play with horses :) I quite like that balance especially as I get to indulge my glitter and finger painting pleasures by day and horsey ones evenings and weekends. One day I'd like a family but not until I am happily settled and can financially afford one alongside the horses.... need to meet Mr Right first though!
 
Ignition said:
Loads of kids and loads of horses here. Bit different in that I keep the horses at home and send the kids away on full livery! :o :D
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If there was a 'like' button I would have clicked it!

It is a matter of finances for me. I have only just managed to buy my first house last year becuase of the money I have spent on keeping horses over the years (I'm 33.....) and I have no children. I've not even got to the stage where I think about whether I want them or not, becuase I just can't afford the time off work at the moment! Saying that, there is no overriding urge to pop a sprog out like some people have.
 
Neither I nor OH have any desire for kids, we like our lives the way they are! I'll never say never, but I can't see it at the moment.
I work with kids from 4 upwards and some of them I adore and could quite happily kidnap ;) only on the basis I could give them back though!!
 
Horses for me.

I have never wanted children and have never really met a child I like- even the well behaved ones annoy me just by being there (I have similar feelings about cats).

People said I would change my mind when I met the right man but I have been with my OH for 5 years, we are getting married soon so I'd say he was the right man- but I still definitely don't want bratlings.

I just can't see what a child would do to enhance my life and only see negatives attached to them.
 
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