***Daughter and Dolly....what would you do.....***

WelshD said:
I would look for a 13.2 pony, its a very under-rated and unpopular size these days and there are some decent ponies out there for good prices, so many people forget about the smaller New Forest and larger sec B and C ponies and these make good allrounders. having an M&M also opens up more show and WHP possibilities

The jump to a 14.2 is quite a big one

I would be definitely overlapping the two ponies as well!
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I've got an open mind size wise, and colour and breed too. We've said, the right pony will be the right pony regardless of type or size. I hope we'll know it when it comes along! Age won't be a factor either, although I'd prefer not too young.

I'm definitely leaning towards overlapping with ponies. It's OH's birthday this weekend.....wonder if I should say "congratulations, our gift to you is Dolly.....now off we go to buy another!" would that work??? ;-)

honetpot said:
My daughter hunted her 11.2 until she was twelve, she rode her 13.2 until she was 16 and I relented and bought her a horse which long term was a mistake. She is not too big for the pony and I would keep looking casually until you hear of the right one. In a year or so's time your lovely daughter will turn into a hellish teenage madam, (they all do, it will pass) and any pony that does not measure up, go like clock work or generally not be perfect will be your fault and if you have spent a small fortune and much anguish on finding the perfect partner and it is thrown in your face you feel so disappointed. Having been on a livery yard with 6-8 teenage girls in various stages of the 'transition' enjoy the uncomplicated pleasure of having a nice pony and a nice child for as long as you can.
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Yes, I completely get you here! I know what we've got to come...I just hope Daughter goes easy on us!! xxx

Lolo said:
The other side to that question is, is it fair to ask Dolly to do more? She seems very happy storming round what she's doing, would she be happier continuing doing that with someone else rather than being pushed for more and more. If miniRM is coming up to 13, she's going to start making friends with more and more PC people even if she's not a member and start wanting to be more at the same level as her peers.

FWIW, I still think you're mental for not doing the PC thing ;) My family is mad as they come, completely non-horsey and my sister and I grew up on freebie ponies we begged and borrowed for rallies and things. A lot of the kids in our PC do the same and everyone gets on well. It has a really bad rep for being stuffy but you can rock up to rallies in your dark jumper and clean jods and you're away. They don't like bling, but the rest pretty much is a go aside from at area stuff.
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I don't think we've quite reached Dolly's potential yet, I think that's the thing in our minds. She's dipped her hoof in various things and done really well, so there is more to go I think. Dolly had a spell over late summer where I felt she'd done enough for a bit. I don't know if she was unwell for a few weeks - she was definitely not herself, but that seems to have disappeared now. We're giving her a few days off each week, and she seems to be happier and have a better attitude towards what she's being asked to do.

With regard to the PC thing, daughter was a centre member and has loads of the badges and a few tests behind her. Our PC is just not convenient for us from a work/time/location point of view. We would not be able to make it to the weekly meetings, pretty much any of them - so in my opinion there's no point in half doing it.

I don't feel Daughter is missing out in this respect. She has a big network of friends at our yard - which constantly has group lessons for liveries and loans plus trips out/instruction etc... to be honest to add to that another social commitment would be a bit too much. We have a fantastic livery manager who regularly takes the kids out competing/farm rides/beach rides etc... along with a "saddle club" that teaches all the stable management etc....

I appreciate the value of pony club, but I feel what we have more than covers the bases. There's only so many hours in the day!!!! :-)



samlovesprilly said:
Yep, really! Her stirrups had been hoiked up to super short xc length in these pics - normally her feel were past ponys belly but they never did any pole bashing lol!

I agree with Lolo in that you know Dollys limits and know if she will be happy pushed a little more as your daughter grows older, or will be happier doing something similar as she if now, just with someone else.
Eta the little pony I talked about wasnt flashy at all but loved being ridden and tried her hear out which is why they were able to do so much. Im not saying they jumped crazy big heights every day, but the pony could do everything we did on bigger horses, yet my friend could hack her out the day after jumping 4ft on the buckle, whilst the rest of us had highly strung horses and couldnt!!
Tough one, I dont envy your decicion making!!
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Thank you - and I think that pony is amazing!! I wouldn't call Dolly flashy either, but god she has given us so much. She's no star, and can be quirky but she has really taught my daughter to kick on and stick on!!! Dolly has been known to give the horses a lead on hacks when they meet something nasty and start backing up, off she goes to lead file to get them home!! It does look funny when they all come back with Little Dolly leading the way lol!!!!!

Thanks for your lovely advice, it's quite inspiring! xxx

maccachic said:
Not sure if its been brought up but the saddle in the first pic looks really far forward, could be the angle however?
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Hi, probably a bit of both. Dolly has a very long back, so it can look forward. It's been mentioned on here a little in the past ***wink***!!!

I promise you, it's fine. It's been professionally fitted and checked regularly. When she dropped a bit of weight it started to slide forwards, but we adjusted the fit and we find a thicker numnah and girth sleeve helps too.

I think it's the curse of the barrel shaped ponies! But thank you for asking x

Hippona said:
Keep her for another year...don't do what I did, which is rush into moving up and regret it as daughter lost her confidence.it's taken some getting back,I can tell you.

(Or give her to me;))
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hahahaha Dolly has a lot of votes for being kept for another year.

But my preference is to keep her FOREVER!!!!! mwhahahahaha! :-)

Booboos said:
Keep the partnership going. They are having loads of fun together there, Daughter does not look too big for Dolly and there is no reason why they can't work on their dressage over the winter and go out eventing next spring.

Changing ponies (and even worse moving from ponies to horses) is really tough and a lot of children give up because the new pony was too much of a challenge. If it ain't broke don't fix it!
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Thank you. Yes, their dressage was ok last year but constant "lacking roundness" dented the points a bit. Now this is getting better, we did think about them doing more dressage. They can put a really accurate test together, it was just Dolly's way of going. Seems a shame to stop now, when this is just being cracked.

Hard choice......

OldNag said:
Sorry I should clarify my first answer.... definitely keep her another year..... but I should have added -sell or loan her but only if I can be first in queue. I reckon my 8 yr old will be Dolly-ready by then :-)
(though I guess we would have to move house a bit!).
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Best thing is, I know you're not joking!!!! ;-)

hollyandivy123 said:
another one to keep for another year but with a twist, keep a look out in the market. As you say you have the option of loaning to the riding school or working livery, with this in mind you can have a leisurely look around what starts to be advertised in the spring, you might even find a loan of an older school master. you will not have the pressure of finding the next one in a short time, the school master would bridge the learning gap.
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I'm seriously thinking of trying to convince OH that we need two - even if just for an overlap period (of ten years!).

Perhaps I should say I need a pony too...a 14hh dun Connemara that likes eventing, and then find myself hopelessly overhorsed and have to pass it on to daughter ;-)

Or worse, not overhorsed, and keep it for meeeeeeee!!!! :-)
 
toffeeyummy said:
Keep her!!! I am in the same situation as my daughter who finally gained control of her pony, is now looking a little tall. But she is very lightweight and until she is too heavy she will keep riding him. Plus she has a little sister waiting for him in the sidelines so its easier for us I suppose. Definitely keep her for another year, why not, they look fab together xx
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Why not indeed!! In a perfect world, I'd just buy her another in the next 6 months and she could have two. I know she'd love that. But we don't have our own land, so it's the cost of livery really. Dolly's just so much fun, and Daughter is really good at adjusting what she does to suit Dolly - whether it be doing more because Dolly's "up for it" or less before she's done enough. She's really flexible so that does make life easier - whether she'll stay that way as she grows older is another matter though!! ;-)

micramadam said:
Loved reading the replies and oh how very different it is over here.
Most 13 yo's over here move straight up to horses. Very very few stay with ponies. My daughter's 1st pony over here (she was 9 yo) was a chunky 14.2 Fjord. We made that decision because we didn't want to go through what you are going through now and he is chunky enough that I can ride him as well. She was just a dot on him, but he was (and still is) the perfect pony to learn on. They had great fun together and did everything, jumping up to 1m 10 but dressage was their thing and they got to affiliated medium advanced before he did his rear ddft in. He's now semi-retired, still with us and ridden by a girl who is 5ft 10 and has no interest in competing. But then I'm a big softie and can't bear to part with him. We are fotunately in the position where we can keep him. The others would have to go before him. He's more than earned his place with us.
I don't envy you your decision! If your daughter is serious about competing and you can't keep or loan Dolly out then you have your answer. I am in agreement with starting to look now with a view to buying in the spring. So much can change in 6 months, you may be in a situation to keep her or you may find a lovely family to buy her and a fantastic new pony for your daughter. Good luck whatever you decide.
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I really love your point of view, thank you for sharing! And you make a lot of sense. Thank you xxxx

Spotsrock said:
Another year yet at least
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Thanks Spotsrock! xxx
 
I haven't read all the replies and I'm fairly new here! :)

It's not a great time of year for selling/loaning ponies so if it were me I'd be inclined to keep Dolly over the Winter and reassess come the Spring.

Over the Winter, there is no harm in keeping an eye on what's coming up for sale locally. It sounds like it would have to be truly special to replace lovely Dolly! :)

Also, I think having an honest chat with daughter about what she wants to achieve next year and what she wants to concentrate on is a great idea as then you can see if Dolly will be capable of doing what daughter wants.

I know my daughter has decided to leave PC next year and do more local riding club stuff. Her old pony is semi-retired so she now has a horse that will be capable of moving up with her.

It is SO tough though! And very hard to separate head and heart when making these decisions.
 
Hiya! Haven't read all the replies as on a mission at home....but it sounds as though you are where we were last year.....Mini was very leggy on the 13.1 pony but we had already bought the next model, very young, very cheap and just lolloping around in the background. She still competed little pony until he suddenly sold Feb half term having been advertised since October then she could move full time onto younger bigger model. Its a bad time of year for selling anyway so I'd start looking now, it may take months to find the right pony, or if he/she comes along earlier remember its a bad time for selling and make an offer, you may be surprised, then if successful you could loan Dolly to someone at the centre until Feb half term then advertise her?
 
If you do decide to keep Dolly for another year, I hope that you do go to pc, not to the rallies if need be, and not as a member (although the rallies are monthly and a lot of them fall in school hols, so you wouldn't miss much) but to the shows, which are open to everyone anyway. The shows you have been doing were just what you needed, but are, to a large extent, shows for novices and beginners, especially adults, so as D and Dolly get going, there isn't a lot of competition.. The difference at the pc shows is that there are a lot more whizzy ponies that she would jump off against. There are teams, there is a load of other children cheering each other on etc. It would enable you to see how children of the same age are doing and what they are on.. Yes she gets some of that at your yard, which is a fab yard, but it is, overall, a riding school and is aimed at that lower level, not competition type stuff.. I think you've all done great, done everything right, daughter has ridden superbly, but now you need to aim a little higher. I think getting out to more competitive shows and bigger classes with more fillers etc may well give you the decision anyway.

And I hope I'm not upsetting you. I just think D is ready for a bit more now. And 14.2 would be fine. Where's the pic of her on 17h Rob! I know its hard selling, you know I was as bad when Harvey went two years ago (have you noticed on our yard I can't even bring myself to take the nameplate off his stable yet!), most of us have been there..
 
Waves back at Old Bat (who's daughter is an ad for pc if ever there was one!).

Ok, new plan for you....

Keep Dolly over the winter. Keep doing things with her. After Xmas - towards end of Jan, start looking for a new pony (obviously if anything perfect comes up in the meantime...). Take both out to shows next year, but perhaps put some ads up on your box/at venues suggesting Dolly would be for sale/loan..? By then, hopefully D would be involved and "distracted" by new pony. That's what we did with my stepson's first pony. Not quite as many tears when the pony went (from me or him) as some of the affections were slightly transferred to the new pony..
 
I'd put her saddle back three inches judging by the photo's and then Dolly would fit for another year until she's out of 12 and under. :)
 
I personally think your daughter has outgrown what dolly is capable of. As much as a lovely team i think they are she could do with a well schooled (almost push button type) 14.2 connie/nf type to progress further as i do think A is a brilliant rider but dolly is holding her back. If A has parental support (which she does - im very jealous!) then why not go out and do it - find the perfect competition pony and go and have fun!

Starts horse shopping for A.....
 
Honey08 said:
If you do decide to keep Dolly for another year, I hope that you do go to pc, not to the rallies if need be, and not as a member (although the rallies are monthly and a lot of them fall in school hols, so you wouldn't miss much) but to the shows, which are open to everyone anyway. The shows you have been doing were just what you needed, but are, to a large extent, shows for novices and beginners, especially adults, so as D and Dolly get going, there isn't a lot of competition.. The difference at the pc shows is that there are a lot more whizzy ponies that she would jump off against. There are teams, there is a load of other children cheering each other on etc. It would enable you to see how children of the same age are doing and what they are on.. Yes she gets some of that at your yard, which is a fab yard, but it is, overall, a riding school and is aimed at that lower level, not competition type stuff.. I think you've all done great, done everything right, daughter has ridden superbly, but now you need to aim a little higher. I think getting out to more competitive shows and bigger classes with more fillers etc may well give you the decision anyway.

And I hope I'm not upsetting you. I just think D is ready for a bit more now. And 14.2 would be fine. Where's the pic of her on 17h Rob! I know its hard selling, you know I was as bad when Harvey went two years ago (have you noticed on our yard I can't even bring myself to take the nameplate off his stable yet!), most of us have been there..
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Hi. I've skimmed through most replies and have the same thoughts.as Honey08 (who I also know knows you in real life)

I get the impression D&D are currently big fish in a small pony. She's done really well with the pony but I've got thr impression, esp recently, that Dolly is holding your daughter back. She always comes across as a talented capable rider but stuck on a limited pony, mostly in size and ability but partly in temperament. She could be out winning at 95cm classes on a talented pony, or at least gaining more experience at the bigger classes. It's always lovely hearing about her mature and grateful attitude when she does well at 65cm classes but they're beginner heights and she could be further on.

IF she wants. She might not want to. She might be perfectly happy doing consistently well within her comfort zone. And enjoy the challange of a naughty pony. That's many people's aims.

I think I'd have her really work on her flatwork schooling to improve Dollys dressage over the winter and plan to sell in the spring. It'll be a fun challange that will improve her riding and by then she'll have grown even more. And it'll make Dolly more sellable.

I'm not entirely sure what I'm trying to say other than I think Dolly is holding your daughter back from being a very capable competition rider. IF that's what she'd like to do.
 
Honey08 is spot on, and she knows you in RL ................. :)

The first 6-12 months with your new one will more than likely send you back in time about three years, and you'll wonder what on earth you have done, but that is normal, and it will all come right, just as Dolly did. Then Mini RM is sorted with horsepower until she is sixteen :)
 
Honey08 said:
If you do decide to keep Dolly for another year, I hope that you do go to pc, not to the rallies if need be, and not as a member (although the rallies are monthly and a lot of them fall in school hols, so you wouldn't miss much) but to the shows, which are open to everyone anyway. The shows you have been doing were just what you needed, but are, to a large extent, shows for novices and beginners, especially adults, so as D and Dolly get going, there isn't a lot of competition.. The difference at the pc shows is that there are a lot more whizzy ponies that she would jump off against. There are teams, there is a load of other children cheering each other on etc. It would enable you to see how children of the same age are doing and what they are on.. Yes she gets some of that at your yard, which is a fab yard, but it is, overall, a riding school and is aimed at that lower level, not competition type stuff.. I think you've all done great, done everything right, daughter has ridden superbly, but now you need to aim a little higher. I think getting out to more competitive shows and bigger classes with more fillers etc may well give you the decision anyway.

And I hope I'm not upsetting you. I just think D is ready for a bit more now. And 14.2 would be fine. Where's the pic of her on 17h Rob! I know its hard selling, you know I was as bad when Harvey went two years ago (have you noticed on our yard I can't even bring myself to take the nameplate off his stable yet!), most of us have been there..
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Hi Honey, of course you're not upsetting me - you know you couldn't do that, you know how much I value your advice.

However, I don't think you have the whole picture of what they get up to. Mainly because I don't post the whole picture on FB or here. The kids she rides with at the yard are competing kids. Some at BSJA and BE, some went to POYS etc.... so I think I have a good idea of where she's at. ODRC she did brill at, but no - it wasn't against her peers - more teenagers and adults.

One riding club she did for the SJ - which very much was against whizzy kids (12 yrs and under, and a bit of 75cm etc... we didn't go higher because there's loads of fillers in the 65 and 75 - so higher was worse!) - the reason I don't post much about this one, is cause quite honestly she didn't rock the world there! She came 4the in the year, which was a great result following a few fantastic days, and a few wipeouts!!!

The other riding club she did soley for working hunter. She won a few, qualified for the NW Champs there and generally came 2nd or 3rd, in the 12 yrs and under and the novice workers. She came 3rd in the year there.

Then she did the champs, and came 5th out of 30. Result after a very dodgy run up to it!!!!

So honestly, I think she hasn't been a big fish in a little pond at all. And I'm not saying that to be defensive, just to give a clear indication of what she's achieved and what point she's at.

If she hadn't been up against her peers, as you say, I'd be more inclined to keep Dolly for another year to give her that "final best year". My point is, I think she may have had that year, and I agree with you - I think she is ready for a bit more.

And yes, I too think she'd be fine on a 14.2hh.

I've searched high and low for the photo of her on Rob, but I can't find it on my PC! Will upload from my phone later, and it will show everyone just how long her legs have got!!!

Will reply more later, busy day at work today - can't skive off as much!!!

xxxx
 
Option 3 is a lovely idea, but IMO you may find your daughter struggles to do either of them justice over winter- it is much harder to look after 2 horses than 1. :( I think D & D are a fab combo & should enjoy having a last blast until spring! Xx ps. Wasn't someone on here trying to rehome a 13.2 coloured jumping pony recently.....?!!! ;)
 
redmone said:
Come on then, honest opinions. What would you do? Time to move on, or maybe give them a little longer together? Remember those "OMG I've bought a monster pony" threads....never thought I'd be writing this one. :(

I've got wine and halloween popping candy and jelly sweets for anyone that gets this far!!! :D

RM! ;)
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yup, daughter is obviously faaaar too big. swap dolly in asap and spare us and more should we shouldn't we move Dolly on threads.
 
Thanks for all the advice everyone, I truly am grateful.

Its a very difficult decision for us, and 3 years in I still consider us novice owners so HHO has been an endless source of support for us. I have the opinions of those close to us, and I include in that Honey08 and Zoe, along with other friends from Facebook. My reason for this thread was to gather a few more opinions and ideas, from people not so close to us, an independent opinion from those who I knew wouldn't hold back or spare our feelings.

I've achieved that and got a couple of really good ideas which I'd not considered, and I've also learnt that this time of year is not the time to sell, but is the time to perhaps look to buy.

Someone has also given me the idea of looking to loan a pony for daughter, which stupidly I'd not really considered. I like the thought of that.....

So thank you everyone who took the time to reply, well almost everyone (not PBS!) ; )

RM x
 
Oh dear PBS, I guess not :(. I shall refrain from suggesting keeping Dolly and trading in daughter then for fear of similar admonishment. Just kidding RM.

Agree re saddle being too far forward though, that's what makes Dolly's back look so long. May also be why she was being reluctant a while ago. It should about 2"behind the shoulder blade to allow it to move without hitting the saddle and in your photos it looks too far up the withers putting daughter over the shoulders. Get that sorted and I bet her outline will improve. Just my thoughts of course. Look forward to the daughter and new pony updates :)
 
piebaldsparkle said:
Thanks LIR & AZN Luv Green Jellies and Jaffa Cakes. RM you can keep your popping candy, don't like it anyway (gives me a headache). :p
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Nope, it was you that said no popping candy, a deal is a deal, of course you can have some!

Still wondering why the harsh tone though.....actually double jelly sweets and popping candy for you, you need sweetening up!!! :-)
 
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