Feeling anxious and uneasy......is it me or is this all a bit odd?

I completely understand where you are coming from OP but if it were me I wouldn't be pulling my hair out just yet (I am definitely the least suspicious person out of everyone so far I think!).

As with so many of these things it is most likely a very simple explanation- mother is a scatterbrain/can't work a mobile/no idea what day of the week it is etc... I would give them a call this evening and have a conversation with them.

Remember there are always other people's perspectives involved in these things- they are probably head over heels with your horse, consider him part of the family already and just haven't been very organised. Also money is a very funny thing; what is a fortune to one person may be pocket change to another. I 've known horse sales in the past where the money exchanging hands was big sums for one person but very little to the other and that will always have an effect on people's urgency etc... When people don't need the money they often forget others do!

Fingers crossed it is just crossed wires and it works itself out. After all it sounds like a fab home for your boy!
 
Also remember there can be complications with actually getting the cash. Getting money in the right account, getting cash out etc etc.

I would suggest that they bacs it to you today as they are happy and see what happens. I wouldn't turn up with the box.
 
i'd ring tonight and make a concerted effort to speak to mother or you'll probably give yourself a restless night worrying about it all.

id also like to know how old daughter is- over 18 i assume?.

You're probably worrying over nothing and they are just being a bit lax about the whole thing - but as another poster has pointed out, they can afford to be, they have your horse and your money! Although unfortunately, ive never surprised by how rude and devious some people can turn out to be.

You're not worried about the horse's immediate welfare or being sold from under you you say, so try to relax. The worst that can happen you think is they dont want him and although annoying as that will be, its not the end of the world. Perhaps call daughter back and say you will be ringing Mum tonight and what time is best please?..or just leave it and give her a ring 8pm ish

Goodluck.
 
to try and put a positive spin on it: perhaps the reason they don't seem to have got round to specific confirmation today is because they are so happy with him they feel like they have him already, so date wasn't important as not returning him? (if u didn't like a horse after 2 weeks your not going to hang onto him)
or on a slight negative, they might be unsure and not sue how to break it to you that they don't want him, as nothing major has gone wrong
also some people are just really disorganised!
all the best
 
Try not to worry, they just sound like they are more 'relaxed' about the sale than you, i am sure if there had been problems, they would have said before now.

If the mother has not rang you back by lunch time tomorrow then if it was me i would just start to pester,i would keep ringing until i got through to her and arrange payment either via bank transfer or cash in my hand.

Hope it all works out for your boy.
 
I had a pony out on two weeks trial on the understanding that if they wanted it after two weeks they would pay me as he was a bargain price as I hadn't had to advertise. Two days before the 14 days was up they said they were worried about something, but hadn't booked a vet for a vetting because they couldn't get their vet could they have longer. I was seriously p***d off and said I wanted him home ASAP. Sold him 4 weeks later for a £1000 more.
Be friendly but firm, you want your money, its been half term they have had plenty of time to try him, no cash you want him back as soon as possible, no excuses. At the moment its the best time to sell a horse, there will be another buyer. If he was rubbish it would have been back by now.
 
Last edited:
Been following this thread, hope it all works out. I echo everyone else. Hopefully they are just scatty. :)
 
I think maybe they havent got the money to pay, and are keeping you hanging on........... and two weeks further on you still wont have the money from them.....
 
Well- still not heard anything!!!

Will have to wait and see what tomorrow brings but if it is silence I will have to start chasing!!!
 
You should have set a deadline, or a day and time to call and make the agreement.

I think you need to call them or text then with a time tyo are going to call them.

You need a straight answer or you get your horse back, otherwise they are getting a horse for free but if anything goes wrong they will soon be in touch asking you to pay a vets bill!
 
When should it actually have finished, the trial? Yesterday or today? Did you ask the girl to get her mum to call you? They are being a bit rude really. A quick text to say "sorry I haven't got back to you, having a hectic day.." would have been polite, even I would have managed that, and I can be a bit flaky! Hope they are in touch tomorrow.
 
If I didn't hear anything by tomorrow lunchtime I would be going and getting him. I know you don't want to lose a sale, but what if there is a problem and you leave it too late? You can still be polite and pleasant about it, but just say until the sale is sorted you would rather he was home with you.
 
Did you know call them this evening?

Even a missed call from you should stir them into action.

As late as it is i would be tempted to send a text and say
sorry we couldnt catch up today but we should speak in the morning.
Shall i call you or will you call me, what is the best time?
 
Hope you manage to speak with the lady this morning. You've had good advice - I second going over there today late afternoon if you still haven't had contact and give them a deadline
 
Well- still nothing.

If I don’t hear by lunchtime I am going to have to chase which I am dreading as I am the most un-assertive person ever and quite frankly it is ridiculous anyway!
 
Have you heard anything yet?? Sounds like she's either very cunning or very rude. If she starts haggling over money i would say as she's given nothing but good praise about the horse whilst he's been with her, and as she's gone over the 2 week trial period you will be wanting the full asking price. I hope it all turns out well, will keep fingers crossed for you.
 
Well- still nothing.

If I don’t hear by lunchtime I am going to have to chase which I am dreading as I am the most un-assertive person ever and quite frankly it is ridiculous anyway!

Yes you must chase at lunchtime .
Make a note of what you need to say before the call to keep you on track if you are nervous.
 
Well- still nothing.

If I don’t hear by lunchtime I am going to have to chase which I am dreading as I am the most un-assertive person ever and quite frankly it is ridiculous anyway!

Yes, give it until midday. And then if you haven't heard anything organise transport to go and collect the horse this evening or tomorrow.

It doesn't have to be confrontational. Just ask them if they're having the horse, and if they say no - say no probs I'll pick him up later.
 
Yes, give it until midday. And then if you haven't heard anything organise transport to go and collect the horse this evening or tomorrow.

It doesn't have to be confrontational. Just ask them if they're having the horse, and if they say no - say no probs I'll pick him up later.

Yes- but it will be at their bloody expense. I paid half of the cost for a transport company to bring him over there, which everyone said I was a mug for doing. I am not paying full whack to bring him back if they don't want him. I know he's my horse and if worst comes to the worst I'll have to but it will be totally unfair and in the agreement that they signed it states that if they dont want him he is to be transported back at their expense.

I just really don't understand why they can't just drop me a quick text/VM stating whether or not they want my horse and what's going on.
 
Yes- but it will be at their bloody expense. I paid half of the cost for a transport company to bring him over there, which everyone said I was a mug for doing. I am not paying full whack to bring him back if they don't want him. I know he's my horse and if worst comes to the worst I'll have to but it will be totally unfair and in the agreement that they signed it states that if they dont want him he is to be transported back at their expense.

I just really don't understand why they can't just drop me a quick text/VM stating whether or not they want my horse and what's going on.


Have you tried ringing them this morning? I don't think I'd have the same control as you are demonstrating. Not that I would be rude or anything. I also hate confrontation and would absolutely remain as polite as possible but i would want to know what on earth is going on and ASAP. Apart from the money situation, I would be really concerned about the horse itself by this point.
But maybe that is just me.
Whatever their reasons, genuine or not, they are completely out of order.
 
Have you got anyone more 'scary' than you, you can ask to deal with them for you?
Ive been in a similar situation where the people that had one of mine on trial decided not to buy but wouldn't pay to have the horse returned to me (despite it being stated in the contract) ...im also not very confrontational....but my boss grabbed the phone off me and within 2 minutes of talking to her they had agreed...got him back the next day! Shes a force to be reckoned with :eek:
 
I would ring them now. This should be on your terms, not theirs. Don't mistake being assertive with being agressive or rude, they are not the same. You can be polite, yet assertive. Don't apologise either. Just say what you need to say, write down key points that you want to get across.

This is your horse, they have had the two weeks trial, you need to take control and get this back on your terms.

Good luck :)

ETA If you want me to ring, I will be more than happy to. I'll probably even get them to pay more for your horse :P
 
No- no one more fierce here, I’m at work  though one of my (very assertive) colleagues would probably ring for me if I wanted but I’m 26, I need to start sorting things out myself in life.

There COULD be a perfectly innocent explanation but I am feeling angry and resentful at being put in the position where I have to ring and chase and ‘be assertive’ I shouldn’t have to.

I really think they are going to try and bargain me down at an already nominal sum.

Blah, just been having a bad couple of weeks really tbh. I seem to constantly have people taking the P or advantage because of my good nature and possibly at times lack of assertiveness. I am seriously considering going on some type of course. Fed up of trying to be nice to get it thrown back in my face. I even gave them two bags of feed to see him through the 2 weeks he was there as well as paying half to transport him over. Let alone agreeing to the trial in the first place against my better judgement.

I really want them to be genuine and have him as he deserves a lovely, loving home :(
 
Just phone now and say the following

"Hi ........... I'm calling because the trial period with xxxxxx ended yesterday. I know you have been really happy with him so we need to nake arrangements for you to pay and for me to give you a receipt. I thought it might be easiest for you to pay by BACS as we are both busy, shall I text you the details or would you prefer to give me cash?"

Don't go getting scary with them or turning up with the trailer until you have tried this approach. If they don't answer read the above on their voice mail and keep calling hourly until they pick up or text you.

Only get heavy if you are worried and have got to the stage where you are willing to lose the sale.

I had my horse on trial and at the time the trial ended I was in a difficult position with changing jobs so logistics of making arrangements to meet or even make calls were difficult but I intended to go through with the purchase and would have been pretty cross if the seller had turned up to take the horse away just because I hadn't been available by phone one evening.
 
PP you're definitely not being unreasonable, so that should give you some confidence. Tell them you need to know if they're buying him, they signed a contract and that date has passed so you'll assume if the money isn't in your hands later that you'll pick him up. Call their bluff, I think they know you're keen to sell to them and so are just holding back, or waiting to barter.
 
Just read your last update. No need to be aggressive but you do need to make the call NOW.

Write a script. If they try to change ghe deal just tell them "that isn't what we agreed" and "you promised to pay £ xx at the end of the trial"
 
Top