Fun Times
Well-Known Member
I don't normally post competition reports as I am terribly insecure and assumed no one would be interested in what myself and the Big Horse were upto. Also I have fat thumbs which makes typing on my phone tiresome. However after a recent thread about "where have all the competition reports gone" (I paraphrase) I determined to overcome my phobia and post a report on us doing BE 90 at Askham Bryan, our final run of the season. Panic and crisis at 6.00am when I couldn't see the Big Horse in the field due to fog and darkness. Steeled self to call police (this is surely cause to make a 999 emergency call and not that other number for calls when you have lost your house keys/have squeezed a spot, isnt it???) to report missing Big Horse. Tried to remember for the purposes of police description exactly which legs are white. Further panic as cannot remember leg colour. Argh, not only have I misplaced the Big Horse but I have forgotten what he looks like. Panic replaced with anger as Big Horse emerges from under the trees, laughing. One hour and five excited poos later (Big Horse, not me) and we are enroute. In the fog. OH had specifically asked me last night if I knew how to put fog lights on in the truck and I gave him my finest "what kind of numpty do you take me for" speech to which he had the good grace to apologise for his patronising ways.
Fast forward ten hours to panic and crisis. No idea how to put fog lights on. Randomly press all buttons twice....oh look, thats how you wash the windscreen, how interesting. Give my yardowner's hubby a cheery parp of the horn as we leave (accidental parping, was still looking for fog lights).
Arrive safely. Warm up like a hippo on illegal substance (Big Horse, not me). Have a mild panic and crisis about fact Big Horse seems to want to plough forward into every downwards transition. Try to correct by patting gently on neck and begging him to please stop it. Plan does not succeed. Abort niceness plan and give Big Horse a kick. Hippo shoots forward. Panic and crisis.
We produced a fairly nice test which scored high twenties. Although I suspect the judge could only see the upper half of it as the fog was so bad.
On to the sj and despite whacking every pole we had a lucky clear. I left the nail varnish of shame (I.e the paint off the poles) on his feet to encourage him to be more careful.
On to the xc. Now this is what Big Horse comes for. He tolerates dressage. He finds sj a bit meh. But he does them because he knows it leads to his favourite thing...belting wildly across a field with me hanging on to his ears pleading with him to please be careful. After 1.5 hours delay waiting for the fog to lift, the organisers made the decision to abandon the xc phase. Now I personally think this was the right choice in the interests of safety. Big Horse however reached in to the back of the truck to find my longest dressage whip and went in search of the organisers, wearing his grimmest expression.
And thus endeth our 2014 season. We were lying second when we left (having wrestled the whip off Big Horse and used it to prod him back to the truck). You know how it is, we have all been there and disappointing though it was to have the weather ruin our season finale I took it on the chin like a mature adult. Meanwhile, from the back of the truck comes the wails of a tantrumming Big Horse "dont take me home, I want to go xc. I can see the fences perfectly well. Wahhh!!!!"
Fast forward ten hours to panic and crisis. No idea how to put fog lights on. Randomly press all buttons twice....oh look, thats how you wash the windscreen, how interesting. Give my yardowner's hubby a cheery parp of the horn as we leave (accidental parping, was still looking for fog lights).
Arrive safely. Warm up like a hippo on illegal substance (Big Horse, not me). Have a mild panic and crisis about fact Big Horse seems to want to plough forward into every downwards transition. Try to correct by patting gently on neck and begging him to please stop it. Plan does not succeed. Abort niceness plan and give Big Horse a kick. Hippo shoots forward. Panic and crisis.
We produced a fairly nice test which scored high twenties. Although I suspect the judge could only see the upper half of it as the fog was so bad.
On to the sj and despite whacking every pole we had a lucky clear. I left the nail varnish of shame (I.e the paint off the poles) on his feet to encourage him to be more careful.
On to the xc. Now this is what Big Horse comes for. He tolerates dressage. He finds sj a bit meh. But he does them because he knows it leads to his favourite thing...belting wildly across a field with me hanging on to his ears pleading with him to please be careful. After 1.5 hours delay waiting for the fog to lift, the organisers made the decision to abandon the xc phase. Now I personally think this was the right choice in the interests of safety. Big Horse however reached in to the back of the truck to find my longest dressage whip and went in search of the organisers, wearing his grimmest expression.
And thus endeth our 2014 season. We were lying second when we left (having wrestled the whip off Big Horse and used it to prod him back to the truck). You know how it is, we have all been there and disappointing though it was to have the weather ruin our season finale I took it on the chin like a mature adult. Meanwhile, from the back of the truck comes the wails of a tantrumming Big Horse "dont take me home, I want to go xc. I can see the fences perfectly well. Wahhh!!!!"