Hand hold needed

blood_magik

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Yesterday I got the news that my youngest big boy is broken beyond repair. There’s a long list of issues.

I’ve booked him in to be euthanised at home next week.

I feel so guilty. He's only 7. I guess I just need to be told that I’m doing the right thing for him, as hard as it is. I’ve never had to arrange for a horse to be put to sleep - my 4yo was an emergency after breaking her leg in a freak accident and my old boy dropped in the field at 23.

He’s not the right type to be a companion - too big, needs hard feed to keep weight on and corrective shoes.

I’ll be holding him when he goes so he’s not alone. Please tell me I’m doing the right thing
 

Pearlsasinger

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You are doing the right thing for him. It is a very hard decision to make under any circumstances but especially when they are young - and to have to do it twice is even harder, as I know having been in your position. You don't really have a choice, though. What would happen if you didn't pts?
 

Green Bean

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Not an easy decision at any age or circumstance. I dread the day I have to make the call. Our horses are our friends and soulmates. We give them a piece of us, we trust them with our lives every day and in return we are given their heart to keep safe. Hope you are okay and secure in the knowledge you made the right decision.
 

Baywonder

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I have always said, the right decision is always the hardest to make. :(

Please be kind to yourself - you are absolutely making the right decision for your boy.
 

Littlebear

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My horse was put to sleep yesterday, i have to say i feel like i have been hit by a bus today.

Its truly heartbreaking and having to make that decision and the build up and wait is just awful, i would not wish on anyone. I truly feel for you, but there is a comfort after that they are no longer in pain xxx
 

Wheels

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I'm so sorry to hear this :(

If there is poor prognosis and hes not suitable for retirement then you are absolutely doing the right thing
 

meleeka

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Of course you are doing the right thing. You know it or you wouldn’t be doing it. Being selfless is hard sometimes but feel proud of yourself that you are saving him possibly years of suffering and putting his own welfare before your own.
You will feel so much better once it’s done x
 

View

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Oh lass, always a dreadful decision to make, but such a selfless one.

Echo the advice to walk away once it's done, and if you have another very close to him, please let them see and sniff: this does seem to make it easier for them.

Hugs.
 

Spotherisk

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I’m so sorry... mine was only 10 when I had him pts in February. You are doing the right thing but that knowledge doesn’t make it any easier.

I cut a big chunk of tail hair from my boy a few weeks before I made the decision... you might not do anything with it but perhaps tuck it away safe. I hope it all goes smoothly, big hugs.
 

little_critter

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If you need real hand holding, don’t the BHS have a “friend at the end” service? Or have I imagined that?
You know your horse, you know what he can and can’t cope with so you know you’ve made the right decision. It doesn’t make it an easy decision. Hugs for you both.
 

Nudibranch

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Its hard, I had exactly the same, 7 year old big horse with unfixable issues.
The vet said I would feel relief after, along with sadness of course. He was right. There is no other option, you need to do what is right for your horse and I've been there, and it is the right thing to do. You can't condemn them to a life of pain for the sake of sparing your own feelings, as you know.
If it's any consolation, when mine went it was the "best" of the bunch I've had pts. I stayed with him, it was the vet he has had since a foal, and he knew nothing. I still think of him all the time, and often wonder "what if" but that's all it is. I know he couldn't be made right. I have a lovely pure white braided bracelet made from his tail.

You're doing the right thing.
 

Michen

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If you really don't want to PTS, corrective shoes and needing hard feed doesn't necessarily mean he won't be able to retire? Just won't retire as cheaply as another horse could.

That's not to say it's not completely the right decision btw, I've had a horse PTS because he was never going to stand up to any work, but if you do want to try and retire him it could be worth speaking to the vet re the corrective shoeing etc. Many retirement yards will still give hard feed.

Just an option, but if not a valid one for you, massive hugs. I totally understand the decision and have made it myself before. It's the worst thing in the world xxx
 

blood_magik

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It looks like he had an accident of some sort before he came to us - the first thing the dick vet asked me when he called was had he fallen. There was a hot spot on the spur of his pelvis and they’re questioning whether there was a fracture at some point

the last thing I want is for him to go and hooley about and have his leg go from under him.

as well as that he has vertebrae starting to impinge in his lumbar and coccyx, navicular, thickening of his collateral ligament and he’s tweaked his DDFT.

I’ve buted him and chucked him out with the old boy so he can enjoy his last few days pain free in the field
 

saalsk

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Be kind to yourself in the days remaining, and in the time to come. Right decision, but always going to leave you broken hearted and doubting yourself. Take the time it takes to let the decision settle on you - it may be a while before you really accept to your inner self that it was the right decision, even though you know it is.

Take photos, have quality time, make decisions about things like maybe having a bracelet made from tail hair ( I did, couldn't look at it for 3 months, but now it is very precious to me ) and as has already been said, be there for the end if that is your choice, but don't watch beyond that. I got someone to call the removal people for me, and explain that they needed to give me time to hug him goodbye, then go into the house, and it wasn't anything personal to their job/way they acted, just something I needed not to see. They were very respectful.

Let yourself cry. Don't take it personally if some people - even family and friends - wonder why you apparently still find it hard some time down the road. Not everyone gets it. But we all do. Hugs.
 

ycbm

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I want to congratulate on putting your horse first and your own pain second. Of course you are doing the right thing making sure he can never be in pain ever again. I'm sorry it came to this, I hope everything goes smoothly next week.
.
 

splashgirl45

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yes the right thing for him, not easy for you. as others have said dont watch when they load him, you need a nice last memory. hope all goes well, hugs xx
 

HG95

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It's one of the hardest but most selfless thing you can do. My boy was 10 I'd only had him a few months when he was found to have numerous problems which meant he was in chronic pain.
His last week he was spoilt with eating everything a horse shouldn't have we went on walks and took loads of photos as memories. I wasn't there when he was PTS but the vet and vet nurse let me know when he'd gone and that he had a full bag of stud muffins and went peacefully.
I found losing him tough. But my vet gave me the number for the blue cross brereverant helpline and I must say they really helped just to have a listening ear whilst I poured my heart out.
Don't be afraid to speak out your doing the right thing for your horse and they will thank you for that x
 
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