Horses and having children on yards....thoughts?

I'm not really bothered by kids on yards (keep horses at home now anyway, but have been on big yards previously where there've been children) but what I find weird is how some parents drag their unhorsey kids to the yard with them to get cold and bored, often with no one their own age to play with. We had a lady like that on my last yard, she had a little boy who did all the annoying and dangerous stuff people have mentioned, including running the length of the American barn screeching and rattling a whip along the stable railings, climbing hay bales and falling, spooking horses etc. He was kind of annoying, but I mainly just felt sorry for him as it was just a weird atmosphere to make your kid hang around in, completely bored, for an hour twice a day. It's not their hobby, why bring them?!
 
G&T they bring them because they've got nobody else to leave them with and they're not prepared to give up being a horse owner. I've met loads who are single mums, plenty who are part of a couple but mum does all the childcare because dad isn't really interested/works millions of hours per week, couples where they work alternate shifts so one parent is always home (or up the yard) with the children so there's no childcare costs. Not everyone has grandparents/partners who can/will look after their children while they go to the horse.
 
Sugar_and_Spice said:
G&T they bring them because they've got nobody else to leave them with and they're not prepared to give up being a horse owner. I've met loads who are single mums, plenty who are part of a couple but mum does all the childcare because dad isn't really interested/works millions of hours per week, couples where they work alternate shifts so one parent is always home (or up the yard) with the children so there's no childcare costs. Not everyone has grandparents/partners who can/will look after their children while they go to the horse.
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This! My son is not a Horse fan but he has to come to the barn otherwise I wouldn’t get to see my horse during the school holidays. BUT he’s well behaved and stays out of the cold by staying in our viewing room and plays up there.
 
As long as kids don't bother me too much then I don't mind but ball games and deliberately spooking horses is hard to tolerate. I don't even mind having short conversations with other people's kids but I'm one of those people that kids latch onto for some reason and I end up worn out from the conversation! So prefer a yard with minimal kids!
 
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My son was around my horses from 4 days old, in his car seat on top of the rug rack or in the hay barn behind the fence so the horses couldn't actually touch him than as a toddler he would potter around while they were in the stables and then in hay barn whilst I turned them out or brought in. I even used to sit him on my old mare in the field and lead the othet two horses in and let her follow with him riding bareback from about the age of 16 months! Can't believe now how much trust I put in that mare. He never knew a time when he wasn't around the horses until he got to ahout 6 and decided he really was completely uninterested and wanted to play rugby not ride. If children are supervised properly then I think it is great to allow them around horses from as young as possible. I now look after my two year old great nephew and he helps me muck out, mix feeds and I have jyst started him sitting on one of the ponies. I suppose it's different because I havemy own place and not loads of children around loads of ponies at tge same time.
 
Like I've said before, it's the parents, not the kids.

Same with dogs, it's not the dog, it's the feckless owner.

Crugeral Clt, reminded me with above post - Gosh, how long it used to take to muck out whilst having a newborn baby with me... (on demand b feeding) then the worry about how I was going to handle broodie foaling (horse not human) with a newborn baby (human) in tow.. ..thankfully she dutifully obliged by foaling textbook style in field at the most civilised of times (about 11am) broad daylight... ....being able to keep the horses ticking over on DIY livery/work/and have a family and be able to bring the sprogs with me to share my interests has been a stressful at times, but also a privilege and has certainly made me stronger as a person. Kids aren't for everyone of course (I never actually thought I'd have any!) - even on a yard.

But give us 'good' parents a break. Mine wouldn't even think of being so rude/inconsiderate as they've been 'trained' from young (nice and quiet, keep out the way, here you can muck out with this/help me fill a net/come and pet this pony, volume down, well done).

It's not rocket science. Same as having a well mannered horse - common sense and firm but fair and consistent handling. But I'm going well off piste, so I'll stop now!
 
SEL said:
I might have missed it as we're up to 15 pages, but why do you need to leave your current yard?
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If you go to your settings.. click it .....top right of your user name
click general settings
scroll down ............ Number of Posts to Show Per Page: click show max 40 then you will find there are only 4 pages so it is easy to follow.
 
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ihatework said:
Pretend it’s dogs then. There actually isn’t much difference if you think about it.
Dogs can be on yards and either be generally left to their own devices to bark, pee on stuff, thieve food, wander behind horses etc.
Dogs can be on yards under close supervision and well trained managed with the consideration of others.
Dogs can be banned from yards.

I’m probably more dog friendly than I am child friendly.
I really appreciate being on a yard that is Dog tolerant, but I also fully accept yards that ban dogs - not everyone likes them and ultimately I’m there to stable a horse, not exercise/socialise my dog.
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See what you mean, except a dog you can leave at home unattended, pop it in a kennel if you choose, or even leave it in your car allowing you to get your horsey jobs done... ....much as I've been tempted to leave my children at home/in a kennel/or in a car....... think you get me. Child care is not always easy for some.

Personally when kids are with me it is usually as quick as I can get done what I need to get done (understand tight supervision). I would never try to ride/school/fart about/do dangerous jobs with them in tow.
 
ester said:
So what do you do with your unbound and ungagged toddler when you are doing all the jobs with your horse?
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I would like to know the answer to that too! A small child ran up to my pony and despite vet saying very firmly "Don't touch. Pony is ill", the child "patted" my pony. Pony reared up and lashed out. Mother who had done nothing to stop the child went ballistic. However, the vet went more ballistic! She said later that she did not know what it would have done to her professional insurance if the kid had been injured.

Before anyone criticises me or pony, pony was being investigated for head shaking and was eventually put down as quality of life was so awful.
 
Smogul said:
I would like to know the answer to that too! A small child ran up to my pony and despite vet saying very firmly "Don't touch. Pony is ill", the child "patted" my pony. Pony reared up and lashed out. Mother who had done nothing to stop the child went ballistic. However, the vet went more ballistic! She said later that she did not know what it would have done to her professional insurance if the kid had been injured.

Before anyone criticises me or pony, pony was being investigated for head shaking and was eventually put down as quality of life was so awful.
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This is just the perfect illustration of the point which I was making way back when which someone incorrectly understood to mean that children should only be on yards 18+. If people won't safeguard their children, dogs etc then it is up to others to keep them safe. This sorry tale also illustrates that some adults do not want others doing just this.
 
So pleased I dont have to mix with some of the people with horses I really dont like people much at the best of times. I dont allow dogs on my yard, kids have to behave but I only have two liveries one is retired and never see his owner the other has kids but I dont tolerate bad behaviour and they know it. I dont see much of them either. Like everything else unfortuately the people I dislike are likely to have badly behaved kids too and health and safety is irrelevant to them
 
bluedanube said:
Sad tale. If parents value their children, why put them in danger?
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I don't know when you started riding but I was pretty young - I can remember our dad being pretty strict with us but we were allowed to see to our own ponies and help with chores. I do even remember having a laugh (gasp!! there were many adult casualties) with other girls at camps when I was a bit older.

It would be interesting to know how everyone here , who must have been a child at some point, learned if not at a riding school, yard or home? Unless everyone just started riding as a well behaved ready made silent adult?
 
tallyho! said:
I don't know when you started riding but I was pretty young - I can remember our dad being pretty strict with us but we were allowed to see to our own ponies and help with chores. I do even remember having a laugh (gasp!! there were many adult casualties) with other girls at camps when I was a bit older.

It would be interesting to know how everyone here , who must have been a child at some point, learned if not at a riding school, yard or home? Unless everyone just started riding as a well behaved ready made silent adult?
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Quite!
My daughter came to the yard with me as a baby but stayed in the car or pram in the tack room. I worked it round sleeps!
When she got bigger i loaned my horse out as it was unfair on both of them (i felt, i know people easily manage it but i had no help and a miserable baby and bored horse)
When she was 4/5 i liveried at a family owned farm where they had a child the same kind of age so it was never a problem. We moved to a yard when she was about 6/7 and tbh she was perfectly behaved and quiet around the horses. The problem from my pov was that the poor child was constantly running around after all the liveries who seemed to think she was fair game as child labour!
We were all kids and all had to learn somewhere.
 
tallyho! said:
It would be interesting to know how everyone here , who must have been a child at some point, learned if not at a riding school, yard or home? Unless everyone just started riding as a well behaved ready made silent adult?
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Learned as a closely supervised child at home, at a RS, at school and at Pony Club.

I feel sorry for so many young kids today. They are just another commitment to be juggled, rather than being at the centre of their parents' world.
 
Sugar_and_Spice said:
G&T they bring them because they've got nobody else to leave them with and they're not prepared to give up being a horse owner. I've met loads who are single mums, plenty who are part of a couple but mum does all the childcare because dad isn't really interested/works millions of hours per week, couples where they work alternate shifts so one parent is always home (or up the yard) with the children so there's no childcare costs. Not everyone has grandparents/partners who can/will look after their children while they go to the horse.
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Well yes I understand it's for the parents' own convenience, that doesn't make it fair on the kids though. I'm not talking about the odd time at the yard, or just on school holidays like the other lady mentioned, that's fair enough. It's parents who are on diy so have to do the horse twice a day, and their completely uninterested child has no choice but to go with them, every day - in my experience those are the kids who end up being a pain to everyone else in the yard because they are just bored to tears. If you choose to have a child shouldn't they take some priority over your existing hobbies? Horses take up a hell of a lot of time.
By the way this isn't aimed at the OP who has said her son loves being at the yard and pottering around with her. That's great! But I have seen plenty of parents who are frankly selfish expecting their kids to just fit around them and their expensive time consuming hobby.
On the original question, I think kids are great, particularly kids that are into ponies, and wouldn't mind them on my yard at all. The biggest nightmares in livery yards I've been on in the past have all been adults over 30 that behave like kids!
 
Owning horses is a way of life so having children as well means making a choice, do you just get them to muck in and out! Or do you change your life style to accommodate the children? In my case my horses are at home which does make life a lot easier as by the time my child decided that horses were not his thing I was happy to leave him in the house while I mucked out, fed ect in the stables right next door. While he was small he came out with me and helped or hindered depending on which way you looked at it. If they had been at livery it would have been a lot more difficult but one thing is for sure he would not have been allowed to run around, touch other peoples horses without the owners permission or make too much noise around the place. It boils down to how well behaved the children are and if they have been taught how to behave around horses, I would not have children around my horses that didn't do exactly as I asked the moment I asked it, simple really, if you can't behave keep away from my horses. My son is now 19 and has absolutely no interest in horses at all but I know I can go away on holiday and he is more than capable of mucking out, feeding and being there for the farrier. He was taught from very young how to behave around them and it has stuck with him .
 
tallyho! said:
I don't know when you started riding but I was pretty young - I can remember our dad being pretty strict with us but we were allowed to see to our own ponies and help with chores. I do even remember having a laugh (gasp!! there were many adult casualties) with other girls at camps when I was a bit older.

It would be interesting to know how everyone here , who must have been a child at some point, learned if not at a riding school, yard or home? Unless everyone just started riding as a well behaved ready made silent adult?
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At a riding school with strict instruction from the yard owner. We didn’t misbehave because we were desperate to be there and learn as much as we could! It is not compulsory for children to be wild and badly behaved!!
 
Tiddlypom said:
Learned as a closely supervised child at home, at a RS, at school and at Pony Club.

I feel sorry for so many young kids today. They are just another commitment to be juggled, rather than being at the centre of their parents' world.
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Well that's a rather broad brush to be waving about tiddlypom!!
 
It would be interesting to know how everyone here , who must have been a child at some point, learned if not at a riding school, yard or home? Unless everyone just started riding as a well behaved ready made silent adult?
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Riding school that ran a Saturday pony club and was geared towards and catered to kids.
 
i really dont think kids are supervised and taught how to behave as they used to be

that said, when I was 8 years old I used to go and walk to a local R/S to hang about. I remember watching a livery owner tacking up her horse and standing there metaphorically drooling. I also remember her clearly telling me to step back as her horse didn’t like having it’s girth done up. I didn’t listen and said horse lashed out with it’s teeth as the girth went up and caught my earlobe!! It tore the bottom of the earlobe clean away from the side of my head!! The owner panicked and said I told you to move away!! Rightly so, and I was terrified of being in trouble when I got home.
 
tallyho! said:
It would be interesting to know how everyone here , who must have been a child at some point, learned if not at a riding school, yard or home? Unless everyone just started riding as a well behaved ready made silent adult?
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At a specifically child-friendly yard. The YO actually had two separate yards about a mile apart, one for 16+ and one for below 16s. You could elect to stay on the below 16 yard on the understanding that it would always be child-friendly.

But I don't think that these responses are really about horsey children, more about parents that bring their children along with them while they do their horses, regardless of the child's level of interest.

If this thread was about someone who had an absolutely horse-mad little one and wanted to take them to a yard occasionally in order to encourage that interest, I think most people would feel differently.
 
teddypops said:
At a riding school with strict instruction from the yard owner. We didn’t misbehave because we were desperate to be there and learn as much as we could! It is not compulsory for children to be wild and badly behaved!!
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Ditto. I was a Shetland sized tot and don't remember being overly supervised when I groomed the pony (she was nearly 30 and had taught 100s kids). BUT I behaved because if I hadn't then that would have been the end of ponies. I used to ride that Shetland out with adults on hacks, very much aware that I had to be no bother or that would be the end of hacking.

I seriously don't have an issue providing kids are well behaved and I think most people on this thread are the same.
 
One other aspect to this, is that some woman can't have children and find it very difficult to deal with, a friend of mine had many miscarriages and had given up. The yard she is on is al adults. It would be very hard forher if somone starting bringing babies and toddlers up to the yard. She as thrown herself into horses it's her refuge. Hard enough for her when people ask 'when are you going to have one" childless women need support and considered too
 
I was a riding school kid who inhaled a lot of horse and pony magazine, the pony club manual, a lot of pullein-thomas books, and my Mum's old BHS exam books :D. which made me superb at the RS quizzes ;) and yearned for the 'own a pony days' that if I was lucky I could do once every summer and easter and was taught how to groom properly etc then. When old enough I started working at the riding school I was then at for rides and did the teaching of how to groom properly etc on the own a pony days instead.

Mum and her three sisters had ridden as kids and mum had worked at a riding school and in racing in her younger days but was sent to secretarial college and essentially fully gave it up to have kids. I do remember her being very cross about me being nearly bitten by a feral forester and wondering if I had learned anything about ponies!
 
I don't see how disliking out of control children spooking horses and creating dangerous situations for themselves and others equates to "being so intolerant that its hypocritical cos we were all children once". Im more tolerant of children now then when I was one myself to be fair. :lol: what does that make me? I dont think having been a child once upon a time means that a person then has to put up with all behaviour from all children ever with no complaint :lol:
 
why is it so hard for some people to accept that some of us just dont like being around kids.
Im just not intrested in them. Ive no idea why im like this but its the way i am and i can t change it.
 
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