I just bought my first cob! Introduction + feed advice + photos!

[ycbm]

12 days yesterday. Yesterday had some gains.

Washing. I have no idea why I am doing so much washing. 4 washes day before yesterday, another 4 yesterday. Mats, dog beds, just stuff, all washed and dried and clean. I must run out of stuff to wash soon.

Horse chores of course, then I needed to do weed spraying. I went to the garage and found a sprayer that I couldn't make hold pressure, but then I found a brand new one in a box, unused, so I guess David couldn't make the old one hold pressure either. I couldn't get the lid off the new one

Found some glyphosate type weed killer but it had leaked so I couldn't see the instructions. Put 3 measures in the 5 litre container via the air pump hole, as the lid was still stuck. Of course I splashed some in my face, but I had glasses on so not in my eye. So, the yard, drive and parking area is sprayed. No idea if it is the right concentration, but it is done!

Then, rolling the horse patio area. Did a cr@p job, but it is done.

Then, cutting the end paddock. I started this yesterday but the tractor over-heated, which it did again today. I would be more upset, but it has been over-heating for a while. Came back into the house and called the service place to arrange a service and for them to buy back the hedge cutter. I have also asked them to teach me how to correctly use the tractor when it returns - including what fluids to out where. They are going to assess my other equipment and teach me to use it or tell me what would be better.

The finance man came to copy the death certificate, and then the vicar. The funeral service is sorted and I also have a date confirmed.

The vicar finished just in time for me to finish cutting the paddock wit the now cooled mower, and then I went swimming in the cool lake. I needed a swim. As I got back, the house looked so 'normal' with David's car in the drive and everything normal, it took me aback at how everything has changed in the past 12 days. The house felt very empty. Forced myself to eat and finished the day by sending some emails to tell people when the funeral will be.

It all still feels relentless and overwhelming, and the house feels very empty.

Another day., good morning Red.

You are doing so well. So damned well. I wish you had the headspace to really know that, but it will come in time.

 

[Supercalifragilistic]

You are doing amazingly. It has been a hard year to keep on top of land management due to the warm wet weather, let alone in your situation. Keeping busy is good but please don’t get discouraged by how much there is to do, you are doing brilliantly and if it’s not all looking perfect, that’s ok. Xx

 

[rabatsa]

I know that the jobs need doing Red but be aware that you may be overdoing things and that exhaustion may end up hitting you like a sledge hammer at some stage.

 

[Errin Paddywack]

I know that feeling when you come home and their car is sitting in it's usual place. I had so many times come home to find Michael sitting in his car either just come back or just about to go out. It took a long time to get over expecting him to be there. Doesn't help that head rests can look like someone's head.
In the house I never put his chair back in it's place so his absence wasn't so obvious. So very hard when everything appears to be just as it was but there is a bit missing.

 

[Tracking_up]

Another thought - what would be your dream car? Could you maybe send David's back and get your dream, as a nice way to use the money?

That's a nice thought, and especially as I'm sure David would have supported you to get your dream car, if you were so inclined to....

 

[teacups]

I also have an irrational desire to know what the car is…perhaps not so irrational as it does make a difference. Is it one of those bright lemon yellow or orange low-to-the-ground sporty type things (I always think they look like leaf beetles) or is it more practical? You said it makes you feel safe, so probably not a sporty thing. You also said you really like it: if it had been cheaper would you even have to think about it? Can you park it somewhere where you won’t worry about theft so much? It’s really about what makes you feel right, and your decision.

A friend of mine did keep her husband’s dream car. She said she wasn’t going to visit him at the crematorium memorial garden, but having the car was like being with him/visiting him every time she drove it. After about 5 years she ended up getting a smaller car which suited her needs, which had changed by then, better.

We have a similar tractor mower and it should be able to cope with that length of grass without overheating. A service and instruction session is a good plan.

It’s a lot of work, land management: echo the idea of outsourcing some of it so you will have time to do the enjoyable parts.

Ditto the robot mower - everyone who has one seems to love them. They just tootle away doing their thing, park themselves up to recharge - and when I looked at it the local dealership would happily come and set the whole thing up (for a fee). Pricey to buy if you otherwise just mow it yourself, but not so pricey if you were going to pay a gardener to do it on a regular basis.

 

[Red-1]

Rigsby's eye is a load better. If you didn't know it had been sore, you wouldn't know. He has been brilliant for the drops, as he is for his inhaler. Holds still for both and, with the inhaler, he has learned that I like it when he really sucks the air in.

I will check for the concentration of weedkiller next time, it was just that I'd opened the packet (with surgical gloves on) and it had leaked everywhere. That meant the label wasn't readable, but also that I didn't want to go back inside and use the computer as the gloves were drenched. I thought 3 measures would be OK, as it was marketed as a domestic one and I put it in quite a big container.

The car is a practical type, but very posh. I am inclining towards keeping it today, although that seems to change daily! I think, on balance, that fact that this is a hard decision means I should keep it, however, I bet if I sold it I would soon be used to it not being here. I am so confused as to how a car could hold may attention so much, when I'm not even really into cars. I think part of it is how much David was so looking forward to this one, I mean, reconfiguring it every day for the 9 month wait type of keen. He was desperate for me to drive it and have it "for the day."

 

[cauda equina]

I agree, it doesn't sound as if it's the car itself that's holding your attention but the fact that it was David's and by keeping it you are maintaining a connection with him, if that's what you decide to do

 

[Haniki]

I am another who thinks it would be helpful for you to use the services of a gardener, or some sort of paddock maintenance company. We have around 6 acres and I know how hard it is to keep on top of everything, despite being former farmers!
Take time out to do things you enjoy and look after your health. Remember, you are amazing!x

 

[Tarragon]

I worry about driving a posh car - I just don't want to be the one that damages it first! Much more relaxed in a slightly battered one.
Keeping busy is not only keeping you sane but also getting jobs done, and I think people feel better when they know they are on top of things. I admire you so much for being so capable and doing everything! in time, though, I am sure that getting in help for the jobs that you don't enjoy will allow you to be busy doing things that you do.

 

[Red-1]

I did very little yesterday. Bottomed BH's bed, did normal chores, attended a scheduled/routine medical appointment in the next city and then was exhausted.

One slightly exciting improvement, I *almost* fancied a ride round the block on Rigsby. But, I was too tired. First time I have fancied riding at all though, even though it was only almost!

 

[rabatsa]

One day at a time.

 

[Britestar]

Your weed killer needs 20ml to 1 litre water if that's any help.

 

[Red-1]

Your weed killer needs 20ml to 1 litre water if that's any help.

Ooops.

 

[Red-1]

Ooops.

Although it is good that the weeds are dying in double quick time!

 

[Red-1]

And, thinking about it, I only did 150 to 5 litres of water, not bad for a guess!

 

[Britestar]

Glyphosate is strange. More doesn't make Stronger. It will take around 10 days for the weeds to die off so don't expect an immediate result.
Its kills from the roots up so takes longer to see them die off.

 

[ycbm]

Your weed killer needs 20ml to 1 litre water if that's any help.

I think it comes in diffeent strengths? The glyphosate I used to buy from the agricultural merchants in a 5l container would kill grass at 1 to 200 and weeds at 1 to 100, so the strongest would be 10m per litre.

 

[ycbm]

I did very little yesterday. Bottomed BH's bed, did normal chores, attended a scheduled/routine medical appointment in the next city and then was exhausted.

One slightly exciting improvement, I *almost* fancied a ride round the block on Rigsby. But, I was too tired. First time I have fancied riding at all though, even though it was only almost!

That sounds like a day that would tire me out. One day the "almost" will turn into "I must".

 

[cauda equina]

I did very little yesterday. Bottomed BH's bed, did normal chores, attended a scheduled/routine medical appointment in the next city and then was exhausted.

One slightly exciting improvement, I *almost* fancied a ride round the block on Rigsby. But, I was too tired. First time I have fancied riding at all though, even though it was only almost!

It's perfect that you've got a 'Ride if you feel like it, if not, no problem' horse and not something that needs to be kept working to be sane
Good old Rigs, still doing his job as well as ever

 

[Britestar]

I think it comes in diffeent strengths? The glyphosate I used to buy from the agricultural merchants in a 5l container would kill grass at 1 to 200 and weeds at 1 to 100, so the strongest would be 10m per litre.

Rosate 360 s what we sell and that's the dilution rate. Its a professional use product.

There may be other products.

 

[DarcyPercy]

So, so sorry to hear your news. Just caught up with the thread.

On a practical note, we have a robot law mower and it’s excellent (we call it RoboChop). They now do a version that doesn’t even require any wires placed around the space (like ours currently requires). You just pop them down with their little docking station, plug it in and it goes. You set the frequency and duration from your phone too. Ours is by a company called Worx and I’d throughly recommend. It also quite fun to watch it trundle around.

Sending all love and thoughts. X

 

[Surbie]

I'm still amazed at how much you are managing to plough through. Getting someone in to help you with the field jobs sounds a great idea and might help it all feel less overwhelming.

So good that Rigsby's eye is healing well. And that he can be ridden, or not, depending on how you feel.

 

[ycbm]

I hope things are going OK today Red and you've been too busy to give an account of your day. Sleep tight tonight.
.

 

[Red-1]

Thank you. I have been having troubles with the car dealership. It has been very stressful.

I have got a few more jobs ticked off the list though. X

 

[ycbm]

Thank you. I have been having troubles with the car dealership. It has been very stressful.

I have got a few more jobs ticked off the list though. X

Glad you're OK. OK will do for now.
.

 

[Laurac13]

As ycbm says ok is good, keep going you’re doing amazing under the circumstances x

 

[Meredith]

I don’t quite know how I haven’t read Rigsby’s adventures recently so was shocked to read the recent posts.
I have now read every post I had missed and am struggling to express what I want to say.
Sending hugs. xx

 

[View]

Good morning Red

Wishing you a more peaceful day than yesterday was.

 

[cauda equina]

I am sorry the car dealership is being unhelpful
Might it help to take a friend along next time as a wingman?
I am in no way suggesting that you're not capable of conducting whatever negotiations are needed on your own, but when we are feeling a bit fragile anyway it can help to have some moral support