Is it just me............

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LauraWheeler

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......... or has anyone else noticed how nasty this forum has been lately? :(
I know for some it has always been a scary place but I've never realy had to much of a problem with it. But just lately I find myself shocked by many posts. People (Myself included) post happy posts about something they have achieved and there seems to be many people waiting to just shoot them down. :(
On my post inperticler i'm shore not all the people posting ment to come across as rude and hurtful as they did, But some i'm shore knew just how hurtful they were being. :mad:
Doesn't anyone think before they post anymore?
I know by posting most of the things I do I open myself up to crit constructive or otherwise.
I don't post for advice and I don't post so everyone can give me a pat on the back. I post because I know there are people out there who are genuinly intrested in following Herbs and I progress together. The post I made just before xmas made me wonder if it was all worth it and honestly yes it did upset me. Some of the comments were down right rude. (some were helpful and put in a kind way but others weren't) People seem to forget there is a real person on the other end who has feelings.
I am rather thick skined and am fully aware of my crapness when it comes to riding but I also know how good I can be when i'm more confident. I know what I have achieved in the passed which noone can know from a 4min clip. But many who post arn't as thick skinned as me and may realy be hurt by comments like I got. It even puts people off posting on here which is a shame as there are many knowlagable people on here willing to give advice when it's asked for.
Sorry for this rambling post but I've been bottling up these feelings for a while now and just wanted to get them out. To be honest I've been more upset by afew other posts than my one. One was also by a well known poster and it ended up with people being increadably rude about her. :(
Anyway here is a video I made staring Herbie :) The song summs up how I feel about posting at the min.

[youtube]BLzpqcfqXqU[/youtube]

I don't know maybe i'm just over sensative at the mo. :o
But Please do think before you post a comment on someone elses thread. Thankyou. xx
 
I think you get a massive amount of support on here. The video you are mentioning was not your best, comments were made as they would have been if anyone else had posted. Almost every thread you make have people falling over themselves with admiration for you. How much adoration do you want.
 
justabob you may find it hard to believe, I don't want admiration, but I don't want people to be down right rude either. It's not just me as I said. I'm just using my post as an example. I have had amazing support from this forum and still do. But I know people who are amazed I post on here. HHO has a reputation that it seems to be living up to at the mo and I find that quite sad to be honest. I do get off quite lightly I know but other people do not and as I said other threads have shocked me more.
Do people get a kick out of being so rude?
 
I agree with this. I haven't been here long but have seen many cases of people being shot down for asking for advice.I was shot down on one of my first threads I have to admit it's put me off posting. I understand that in some cases the the OP was stupid and didn't do what they should have done but there away to say it and a horrible rude way of saying it. I wonder wether it's because it's a feeling of safety here that you can say and do things that you might not do in a real life sitaution.I come on here to relax and probably others do too it's just not nice seeing it all the time
 
This is all a bit dramatic tbh and i think a thicker skin is needed. :) I find the majority of people on here give very good impartical advice, whether you ask for it or not. Ive been dealt and dealt my own fair share, but im still breathing :)

ETA - you cannot ask a forum just to post nice things...its a forum with some very knowledgable people on here... as for the prelim video, it wasnt your best and i am sure no one meant to hurt your feelings, but maybe you are being a tad sensitive??? You're not a child after all but a grown woman who should have enough conviction in what you're doing is right, sod everyone else :)
 
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Beautiful video made me cry and in particular on the day that we have lost Obi a forum star we should cherish what we have whilst we have it and enjoy our riding at whatever level.

Chin up hunny I do agree that some folk are too caustic in the rush to be seen as an expert ... the really knowledgeble folk are far more discrete and kinder on the whole.
 
I agree with you Laura, i tend to sit back and just read threads. Sometimes theyare nice threads but some times they end up as one big slanging match!!!You were lovely to me when i lost my boy last year, thank you for that. I would just ignore anything negative and concentrate on the postitive
 
These sort of posts often annoy me but to be honest I kind of agree. The worst ones I have seen of late are old time users being accused of being a troll seriously?

I have never actually been on the receiving end of it but there are posts where even insensetive old me thinks 'holy moly that was uncalled for' and that is saying something because I am usually pretty oblivious.
 
I think some people post comments that could be phrased better.. but would you rather have advice and criticism given to you straight and as an adult - where you would learn quicker, or buttered up and given to you like you're a child?
 
Sometimes it can get a bit bitchy, but you should have a look a baby forum for new mums, its awful. I'd much rather come on here!
 
Jesstickle said:
These sort of posts often annoy me but to be honest I kind of agree. The worst ones I have seen of late are old time users being accused of being a troll seriously?

I have never actually been on the receiving end of it but there are posts where even insensetive old me thinks 'holy moly that was uncalled for' and that is saying something because I am usually pretty oblivious.
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Who's been accused of being a troll now?? I know i accused the person with the kidnapped horse as being a troll, but it blatently is. :)

One thing about horses and horseriding, we are always earning, we can all always do better and we can all have bad days. Chin and and kick on (or more PC, squeeze with your leg and offer your hands forward - on)
 
I thought that the forum had become a little softer lately - you only have to look at all the training / competition posts in The-place-that-used-to-be-CR to see loads of supportive posts, often from OPs who never posted in CR itself, with CR regulars chipping in with support and encouragement. It's one of the best things about the forum shake up - it's really knocked the accusations of "clique mentality" on the head as far as I'm concerned :)

That said, there have been a few threads where posters have been unnecessarily vitriolic or persistent in here. That's nothing new though!
 
Glad i'm not the only one.

Delicious_D I'm not asking people to only post nice things at all. Just to think alittle before posting. On my thread you actualy started off with some constructive crit but as the thread went on you did get quite rude. I'm sorry but it's true or thats how you came across anyway. Also I don't fell this is dramatic at all. Just an observation. Dramatic would be me making a big post about how i'm never posting on here again and flouncing off, only to come back after a short while and continue posting like nothing has happened. Seen that happen many times. I can't be bothered with all that and my skin is plenty thick enough already thanks. As I said it's other posts that have upset me more just using mine as an example as don't want to bring other up again. The OP may not like it. Maybe I am over sensative at the mo. But this is me. I don't easely hide how I feel. I'm more of an open book kinda person. ;) :p :)
 
I think you have to take it with a pinch of salt... its a forum so at the end of the day you are going to get honest opinions. If it really upsets ouy then leave nobody is forcing you to stay. :o:)
 
tessybear said:
I think you have to take it with a pinch of salt... its a forum so at the end of the day you are going to get honest opinions. If it really upsets ouy then leave nobody is forcing you to stay. :o:)
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I have to say that I really dislike posts like this, who are you to suggest others might leave?? It comes across as snipey.
 
Laura, what post? I've only seen nice comments.

These are things you have to remember about posting pics or videos. No matter how good they may be, people will find something to critique. And I'm not on about pics and vids that are disasters, I'm on about normal stuff. I posted a pic of my mare one time in the dry lot. It was a nice Confo pic but still I was cruel as they were in a paddock void of grass. And I did not include a wide enough shot of the piles of hay they could eat if they were indeed starving. So really anytime you post anything remember, scan through and really have a think on if you want to show it. Because it will be raked through the coals. Everyone wants to be an expert. And so sitting at home behind the computer gives people a certain power trip and ego. They get to "be somebody".

I don't post too many pics on HHO. One because I'm lazy. Two because I'm on Facebook and people can see me and my horses there. I had a picture of me when I jumped up on my 3yo for the first time. She just munched away on haylage. But as I bring in with whatever headcollar is handy it was slightly big. Posting here would have been 33 pages of what a moron I am and the horrors of breaking down my 3 yo filly because she got sat on in the barn aisle. Personally I wouldn't care but who needs the agro.

While it's nice to be able to share, sharing in this day and age comes with a price. You have to take the good with the bad.

Terri
 
LauraWheeler said:
Glad i'm not the only one.

Delicious_D I'm not asking people to only post nice things at all. Just to think alittle before posting. On my thread you actualy started off with some constructive crit but as the tread went on you did get quite rude. I'm sorry but it's true or thats how you came across anyway. Also I don't fell this is dramatic at all. Just an observation. Dramatic would be me making a big post about how i'm never posting on here again and flouncing off, only to come back after a short while and continue posting like nothing has happened. Seen that happen many times. I can't be bothered with all that and my skin is plenty thick enough already thanks. As I said it's other posts that have upset me more just using mine as an example as don't want to bring other up again. The OP may not like it. Maybe I am over sensative at the mo. But this is me. I don't easely hide how I feel. I'm more of an open book kinda person. ;) :p :)
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And how long ago was your thread Laura....

i think you are being too sensitive tbh, thats life unfortunately, not roses and daisys, i stand by what i said on your thread as tbh the horse looks unhappy and unfit to be doing the job. Thats not me ripping into you.

This thread feels like a passive-agressive attempt to stir trouble....especially the video....nice... and your older then me ;)
 
Twinkley Lights said:
I have to say that I really dislike posts like this, who are you to suggest others might leave?? It comes across as snipey.
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I am not telling her to leave :rolleyes::rolleyes: perhaps i am snipey then:cool: If i felt that bad about peoples opinions i would leave i don't quite see it as suggesting Laura leave :confused: again across the interent you cannot see body language,tone etc.
 
Glad im not the only one :rolleyes:

Also, according to the facebook rant you put on Laura where we are all idiots, why do you care? You know who i am, i make no attempt to hide my identity. :)

And why am i being singled out as i am not the only one on this thread who made comments about your video...
 
tessybear said:
I am not telling her to leave :rolleyes::rolleyes: perhaps i am snipey then:cool: If i felt that bad about peoples opinions i would leave i don't quite see it as suggesting Laura leave :confused: again across the interent you cannot see body language,tone etc.
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I didnt read it as that either....sometimes this forum can have a lot of hormones. :)
 
tessybear said:
I am not telling her to leave :rolleyes::rolleyes: perhaps i am snipey then:cool: If i felt that bad about peoples opinions i would leave i don't quite see it as suggesting Laura leave :confused: again across the interent you cannot see body language,tone etc.
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Ok perhaps it comes across harder than intended:rolleyes::rolleyes:. Not to single you out of course:cool: but that is the point of the vid that once we say it we can't take it back.
 
Delicious_D said:
I didnt read it as that either....sometimes this forum can have a lot of hormones. :)
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It's difficult like i said if it was a face to face chat im sure my tone would have given away i am not tearing into laura... if i'm honest i dont ever really look at her threads:eek: Oh i agree with that get a bunch of women together and all hell breaks out ;)

Twinkley Lights said:
Ok perhaps it comes across harder than intended:rolleyes::rolleyes:. Not to single you out of course:cool: but that is the point of the vid that once we say it we can't take it back.
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Ah I promise it wasn't :) hmm, but it's like that everywhere you go words are powerful things
 
Laura, you really are very sweet and I should, in all honesty, try to learn a lesson from you. I can be snipey, blunt, critical and negative but perhaps you might also think about circumstances that might lead to someone having this outlook, whatever the reason, it isn't reason enough to be horrid to people and so I should be nicer. I can also be fiercely loyal, would give anyone the shirt off my back or the food in my fridge, drop everything to help a friend and in my life I am the listening ear, advice giver, person to turn to, the one who makes everything ok and the shoulder to cry on.

I don't understand why you have brought your thread up again if it upset you so much, it is only going to bring further comments that you might not like. I commented several times on your thread but don't believe I made hurtful personal comments. My comments were aimed at making your riding more comfortable for Herbs.
 
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