Is there REALLY much difference?? Mares Vs Geldings..

Over the last 25 years, I have had mostly mares and I have yet to figure out what people mean when they say "mareish". To me they are what they are.

Having said that, they have all (except the latest one) been pure or part bred Arabians as well and I still don't understand what people mean when they say "not Arabian like". How does that work? Even worse, three of them have been chestnut, which apparently means they are even worse. Worse than what?

Barnacle, that is interesting. The gelding in my avatar displayed strong stallion behaviour as a two year old, to the point of me getting him blood tested to make sure he had been properly gelded - he was done at six months. And even now at 17, he is still very much a boy and displays some very stallion like behaviour - biting the mares on the neck, herding them, he picks up and carries things and is very mouthy in general, and gets very protective of his girls.
 
Always been a gelding fan... I am constantly time poor and I like the fact that (generally speaking) with a gelding you'll get the same horse out of the paddock most days. Mares are so much more changeable and that is taxing for me.
That said, I now have 4 mares and 2 geldings! The gelding are sweethearts and remain consistent. They are still my faves.
As for the mares... 1 is only a baby so her hormones haven't kicked in yet. We bred her: of course I ordered a colt and got a filly. She is 16 months old and I am NOT looking forward to the coming (Australian) spring! The retiree came to us a premanent free loan: she is the grumpiest old bag you could meet but she is consistently grumpy! Not hormonal at all.
The other 2... I just can't gel with. They are both quite dominant. My daughter's mare has all the makings of a brilliant endurance horse (and was an absolute bargain which is hwy I bought a mare) but every so often she will just decide for no apparent reason not to be caught. She is witchy when in season (don't you DARE apply a leg behind the girth!) and comes into heat at the mere sight of a strange gelding. The other mare is similar although not as bad.
You just can't generalise really, but still, given the choice I would go with a gelding..
But I would never buy a chestnut, which is also totally illogical.
 
I've had about 4 mares and plenty of geldings. The two geldings I have now are the most temperamental I've had! So I don't much care between sex, though currently the yard is set up for geldings only.
 
NZJenny I had someone sidle up to me at a meeting the other day and ask me what horses I rode for endurance.. She followed it up by saying that she was surprised that Arabs were used as she would have thought they were "temperamentally unsuited - far too excitable"! I was fresh from a weekend of vetting totally sensible Arabs at an endurance ride and told her, quite rudely, that a) I had more issues with non Arabs in the social rides and b) she should come and see for herself...
 
After having a gelding I never wanted a mare exactly for this reason of hormonal changeable personality. However when looking for a pony for my daughter snd a new horse for me what have I ended up with...yep you guessed it 2 mares!!
There seem to be alot more mares available at lower/more affordable prices.
I did buy a 3yr old mare who was quirky she would pull faces in the stable and even squished me once when i told her off for kicking I decided i didn't want to put up with that and part exd her for an older mare (5). BTW the 3 yr old went to a very knowledgeable home with a lady who had similarly bred horse who was also v quirky/could be a cow bag!!

So I now have a 6 yr old chestnut mare and a 18 yr old bay mare
The youngster squirts alot when in season but generally has a good temperament
The older one becomes s bit wild in spring but then settles for the rest of the year we love her shes fab but can be frustrating at times with her spooking and her weaving that she does at feed/turnout times not showing our youngster how to behave!!.
 
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I love my mares! I've had more mares than geldings over the years, not by choice originally but now I would choose a mare if possible. I find I have a deeper bond with them :)

I've got one very independent stand-offish one, and one soppy cwtchy one at the moment. Both require a bit of tact but the same is true of most horses ;)

Agree with the poster who said you should view everything that ticks your other boxes. Unless you have restrictions about what you can keep at livery etc (some places only take geldings, for example) then I wouldn't limit your search at this point.
 
I'm definitely a mare person!
Mine is intelligent & gutsy, if a little complex. I'm the type of person that gets bored easily so I love the fact that I have to use my brain to work & train her. She lets the side down every now and again but when she is on form there is no other horse in the world I would rather be sat on.
 
A good horse is a good horse, regardless of the gender, IMO.


I think the way they are handled and trained, as well as influences from parentage and environment have a bigger influence on what the horse is like, than the gender!
 
I definitely prefer geldings :) my current horse is a gelding, and although he can be a bit of a lad (doesn't like being fussed over for too long, gets bored of doing the same thing for too long) I do like the fact that I can tell him what to do, and as a general rule he'll listen. I wouldn't say I've got a partnership with him just yet, but I've only had him 7 months and I've always found it takes longer to bond with boys (and for them to bond with you) than it does with girls

Having said that, I wouldn't rule out buying a mare, but in any situation the horse (regardless of gender) need to suit the rider and that's the most important aspect IMO :)
 
I am definitely a mare person - I have 2 and not only that they are both chestnut! I have had both mares and geldings but decided some years ago that I got on better with mares. Yes they are more tricky in some ways but once you get them on side they give you so much.
 
goussberry said:
I do like the fact that I can tell him what to do, and as a general rule he'll listen.
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Surely that has nothing to do with his sex, but just shows that he pretty well trained?

Whenever these discussions come up, I always think back to the conversation that I had with my vet that mares are often left to suffer painful issues for longer before a vet is involved than geldings because people interpret their pain induced bad behaviour as 'marishness'. Often they have them on supplements eg 'moody mare' when in fact the poor beast has gastric ulcers, kissing spine, a badly fitting saddle, or something else that has sod all to do with their gender.

Now I am wondering if people also dismiss their lack of proper horse training as the mare's fault too?

The thing that really gets me is that often the handlers are women who would be up in arms if they were judged for their suitability to do a job or not, purely on their sex.

If people have it in their mind that 'they don't like mares,' the horse will be able to tell from their body language and will react to that, so in a way it becomes a self fulfilling prophecy.
 
Faracat said:
Surely that has nothing to do with his sex, but just shows that he pretty well trained?

Whenever these discussions come up, I always think back to the conversation that I had with my vet that mares are often left to suffer painful issues for longer before a vet is involved than geldings because people interpret their pain induced bad behaviour as 'marishness'. Often they have them on supplements eg 'moody mare' when in fact the poor beast has gastric ulcers, kissing spine, a badly fitting saddle, or something else that has sod all to do with their gender.

Now I am wondering if people also dismiss their lack of proper horse training as the mare's fault too?

The thing that really gets me is that often the handlers are women who would be up in arms if they were judged for their suitability to do a job or not, purely on their sex.

If people have it in their mind that 'they don't like mares,' the horse will be able to tell from their body language and will react to that, so in a way it becomes a self fulfilling prophecy.
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^^ I reckon there's a lot of truth in this post :)
 
Faracat said:
Surely that has nothing to do with his sex, but just shows that he pretty well trained?

Whenever these discussions come up, I always think back to the conversation that I had with my vet that mares are often left to suffer painful issues for longer before a vet is involved than geldings because people interpret their pain induced bad behaviour as 'marishness'. Often they have them on supplements eg 'moody mare' when in fact the poor beast has gastric ulcers, kissing spine, a badly fitting saddle, or something else that has sod all to do with their gender.

Now I am wondering if people also dismiss their lack of proper horse training as the mare's fault too?

The thing that really gets me is that often the handlers are women who would be up in arms if they were judged for their suitability to do a job or not, purely on their sex.

If people have it in their mind that 'they don't like mares,' the horse will be able to tell from their body language and will react to that, so in a way it becomes a self fulfilling prophecy.
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Not dissimilar to the 'he's a nut-job because he's a stallion' attitude to a horse which is kept in 24/7 out of sight of other horses and treated like the devil incarnate by everyone who comes into contact with him. Like a shetland gelding wouldn't end up the same way, treated like that.
I think people get the horse they deserve, regardless of how much they pay, or what sex it is.
 
I'm on a geldings only yard and love it there so when I need to buy another I will only be looking at geldings. This is the main reason and generally I feel that a good horse is a good horse full stop. However, I've only ever had geldings - more by luck than design as three of my four found me and when I was looking for the fourth I was already at my yard.

In general I think it's as much about the rider as the horse. While I would consider a mare if I could, I don't think I'd end up with one as I'm not diplomatic enough to deal with marish behaviour. That's my issue, not the mare's but, for everyone's benefit, recognising this is important. I know this isn't quite the same but away from horses, I'm a very un-girly girl and prefer men's company. I can't be doing with the drama and tears that come from a group of girls and I think that would apply to horses too. My one, small group of very close girl friends are all quite like me (I've known them 30+ years and no tears since we are about 14!) so probably if I found an unmarish mare we'd get on fine.

I appreciate what you say Faracat, but I think it's the same for geldings - my "thug" would probably suffer the same fate as naughty is expected from him to a certain extent (definitely him not me as have an angel too and they're both treated more or less the same, except I'm tougher on the thug because I can't give him the leeway I'd give the other) while my "gent" got whipped off to the vet the first time he stopped at a jump, aged 19, to be told there's nothing wrong. 6 months on we now know it was the start of something but he struggled on and didn't complain for another 4 months before becoming really quite lame in the space of a couple of hours. So 'good' horses and 'bad' horses (I don't really believe there's a bad horse, but some are naturally more challenging than others), mares and geldings probably do suffer but for different reasons. It's the thing I hate most about horse ownership, not being able to understand when they're telling us something.
 
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I went out looking for a mare and got one. She's great, loves to please and there are never any "off" days. As much as I like all horses, I do find myself enjoying the company of mares as they tend to be a lot more subtle though at the same time more respectful. I handle other friends' geldings and find them a bit brutish and clumsy. If I had to look for another horse, I would probably find another mare. There are lots of great ones out there.
 
Some really interesting posts on here.
Faracat I hear what you are saying totally...I always expect to "fall out" with mares so they must pick up on that and behave accordingly. I'm going to be spending some more time riding my friends mare who is 16 and fairly uncomplicated so maybe that will give me a more positive view.
I'm looking at the horses for what they are at the moment and ignoring the gender factor, there are definitely more mares of the sort I'm looking for 😊😊
 
We currently have 4 mares and 1 gelding.
I do not have a preference as such, however the mares do not run round playing like gelding do and therefore, my fields are far less damaged in the wet months than when I have kept geldings!
The one gelding is a youngster,and currently turned away with other young geldings, so isn't trashing my fields - yet!
 
Faracat said:
Surely that has nothing to do with his sex, but just shows that he pretty well trained?

Whenever these discussions come up, I always think back to the conversation that I had with my vet that mares are often left to suffer painful issues for longer before a vet is involved than geldings because people interpret their pain induced bad behaviour as 'marishness'. Often they have them on supplements eg 'moody mare' when in fact the poor beast has gastric ulcers, kissing spine, a badly fitting saddle, or something else that has sod all to do with their gender.

Now I am wondering if people also dismiss their lack of proper horse training as the mare's fault too?

The thing that really gets me is that often the handlers are women who would be up in arms if they were judged for their suitability to do a job or not, purely on their sex.

If people have it in their mind that 'they don't like mares,' the horse will be able to tell from their body language and will react to that, so in a way it becomes a self fulfilling prophecy.
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There is a lot of truth in what you're saying, and I don't disagree with you at all. I just notice that with mares I have to be a lot more tactful in how I ride, whereas with geldings I can be a little more bossy and not be argued with*. Perhaps riding a mare makes you a better rider, in that sense :-)

*Again, this may be more to do with the horses training/temperament, it's just an interesting pattern I've noticed
 
Have had two mares and many geldings over the years. I'd say they are all individuals and there weren't that many differences. The main one I've noticed being that my mares seemed more willing to talk to me as it were and express their opinion rather than shut up and put up. Never any grumpiness or bad behaviour unless I was having a ditzy moment and didn't listen (looking back they had told me nicely more times that were fair bless um!). My little once in a lifetime mare used to literally just stop and give me the 'erm hello mum' look when she thought I wasn't being fair/reasonable or hadn't noticed something. She was incredible and taught me so much.
 
I wonder whether those on this thread who prefer geldings also prefer men/are slightly suspicious of human women as well?

I know this applies to me! I generally get on better with men than women, but my deeper and more lasting relationships (bar OH and dad) have been with women. Haven't set out to be that way, it's just my experience. My relationship with my mare is like this but we have got on very well from the start as she is very straightforward.
 
I've had amazing mares & geldings.

How anyone can say one is better or worse than the other is beyond me. No horse is the same, let alone generalising an entire gender bracket.
 
IME the most moody, unpredictable horses have all been geldings. To such an extent that at one time when filling a space at my yard I asked only for mares. However, since then, I have had some of the most lovely affectionate geldings pass through my hands, and now, although I generally prefer mares, if I was looking for a new horse, gender would not be a consideration. Temperament comes first, always. I like a horse with an engaging personality. I dislike 'flat', boring horses, or aggressive horses. My last gelding had real personality and presence and so if I came across another one like that, I would choose him over an aloof or unengaging mare.
 
pennyturner said:
Not dissimilar to the 'he's a nut-job because he's a stallion' attitude to a horse which is kept in 24/7 out of sight of other horses and treated like the devil incarnate by everyone who comes into contact with him. Like a shetland gelding wouldn't end up the same way, treated like that.
I think people get the horse they deserve, regardless of how much they pay, or what sex it is.
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I completely agree.

As I said my gelding is not completely easy but it's not because he's riggy (although people have called him that), it's because an idiot Vet ear twitched him when microchipping him as a foal. Now he is very wary of strangers grabbing at his ears and that makes his behaviour appear erratic which does frighten some people, even if they are very experienced.

SLH - I wish you lots of luck in finding your perfect horse. One will be out there, it's just finding them that's the challenge. When I was looking for my first horse after my spinal injury, I ended up going to a yard that had several for sale and it was very interesting to view so many on the same day. I did click with my chestnut mare straight away, she just had such a kind temperament. She picks up the pieces when I mess up (I'll never be as good a rider as I was pre accident) or am in pain. There have been a handful of occasions where I have been half way round a hack and have suddenly been in agony and she has known and looked after me. She has been there twice when grief has struck out of the blue and turned me into a teary, inconsolable mess after a relative has died (one a suicide) and again she's got me home safely. She has her faults, but I can deal with them and she has never frightened me.
 
I have had 3 totally amazing mares in the past who weren't remotely mareish.

I then got a sensitive anglo arab mare last year and didn't realise the neighbours had a little Section B stallion in the field next-door and life was so, so stressful!! Horse was unhappy, I was unhappy. If the girl who has the yard next-door ever leaves then I might consider having another mare. Until then, its geldings all the way - life is far easier!!!
 
Agree with some other posters that you have to look at the horse in front of you.

Saying that I have never had the click with a gelding that I have with a couple of mares. It took a while to bond but once we did it was amazing, like nothing I have ver had with a gelding. I have liked geldings, but never bonded with them in the same way.
 
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