People who 'embellish' their abilities/experience

[Equilibrium Ireland]

No not if the accomplishments are true its when they are enhanced or completely made up people dont like/understand it

Hence my second paragraph. I do see on a frequent basis people being catty because someone is proud of a real achievement small or big. That I don't understand.

Terri

 

[Moomin1]

These threads are weird. Someone writes they hate people talking about their accomplishments then writes but I'm really happy doing what I do. Still seems like needing justification to me in a different form.

In all honesty, it's ok to be proud of real achievements. But in this day and age that gets you loads of backlash and resentment. And real achievements don't have to be Olympic medals. I get people who lie and make stuff up. But one shouldn't mix up the two. As far as FB is concerned, delete them. My FB page is just that. My page. If you don't like what I post hit unfriend. Mind you I'm sure you won't find " look what I just bought" posts.

Terri

There are a lot of posts on this thread which are mixing the two up - genuine sense of achievement over what some people may class as 'small achievements', as opposed to people completely making things up. I have absolutely no problem people being proud of their achievements, but I haven't got the time of day for people who habitually and compulsively lie about things. I find it quite disturbing in many ways.

 

[Equilibrium Ireland]

Agree on that point Moo. I just don't listen or nod politely. Look it when I had my mare on comp livery one of the other owners assumed I was a half wit. She talked to me as if I had no clue how to ride. I didn't really care. Then she stumbled upon stuff I'd done and was mortified. I just said you never asked, you assumed. Any moments of glory I had are well and truly in the past. Now I'm pretty impressed if I can successfully negotiate a 60cm course. Perspective.

Terri

 

[marmalade76]

It is annoying, oneupmanship, people who claim their horses are naughty/mad when their clearly not, and those who just out and out lie. As for bragging, this is a little different, someone could be accused of bragging whan their simply sharing their experiences.

One recent example of someone out and out lying was a friend of a friend of a friend, introduced herself to my friend as an 'event rider'. My friend couldn't quite see it so we looked her up on the BE website and turns out she'd enetred one low level event some time ago and it's marked with a W..

 

[fatpiggy]

I think it is a low self esteem thing, I always excuse them thinking that they were probably brought up by parents for whom nothing was ever good enough and they have grown up being very defensive. I try not to think badly of them as I always think they must be very unhappy inside.
Sorry if this sounds a bit touchy/feely pc but I was brought up in a family where you were never allowed to do something just for fun and if you were considered to not be doing well enough at something you got one warning and then stopped from.doing it if you didn't improve enough.
I remember doing my ABRS TEST in stable management, I think it was test 5, and I managed to get 99% and was soooo thrilled. I went home and told my mother, really excited, and she looked at me and said, really nastily " so what did you get wrong?"--I was so crushed! Should have expected it as I was an adult by then but it is hard to get over that sort of upbringing.

It wasn't quite THAT bad in my childhood, but my parents weren't really interested in anything I did unless it was academic or had exams attached to it. If I did tests at school the results were never good enough and my parents were always reminding me how much they spent on my education ( I didn't ask to go private!) They never saw me ride, play hockey for my school team, come to sports day and I had to take piano exams which frankly have scarred me for life - I can't bear people looking at me and have a tendency to go to pieces under pressure as a result. I sang in a local choir and the director of music offered me singing lessons which I would have loved to do plus I adored him, he was like an extra uncle to everyone, but I was only allowed to take up the offer if I did the exams. Needless to say I was 47 before I had my first lesson and even now I still sing with my eyes closed so that I can't see my teacher looking at me- yep, crazy I know! I hardly ever tell my family of anything I'm doing because I still feel they won't be interested. And then I get accused of being secretive!

 

[slumdog]

I beat Geoff Billington at Arena UK once, he went before me in the British novice and his horse (obviously a baby) said no thanks and he was eliminated. I went in and got 8 faults. Still counts right

 

[Love]

I beat Geoff Billington at Arena UK once, he went before me in the British novice and his horse (obviously a baby) said no thanks and he was eliminated. I went in and got 8 faults. Still counts right

totally counts!

 

[blitznbobs]

I beat Geoff Billington at Arena UK once, he went before me in the British novice and his horse (obviously a baby) said no thanks and he was eliminated. I went in and got 8 faults. Still counts right

Definitely counts - I love it when life deals you a hand like that occasionally!!

 

[slumdog]

He came across as a really nice guy in fairness, but I loved ringing my parents to tell them I'd technically just beaten him lol!

 

[PolarSkye]

I try not to care, as long as their horse is treated properly. I do rather laugh at the 'post every day what I have done and what I have bought for my horse' on Facebook. However, I think it is a form of boasting.

Hmmmm . . . I share a mini diary of what we do with my boy on FB - warts and all. Was it boasting to say that he came 8th in a UA dressage championship the other weekend? Or was it boasting to say that we were very nearly asked to leave East Soley the weekend before that because he was so stressed/badly behaved? Or was it boasting to say that he had a pamper session yesterday - groom in the field with his little friend, mane pulled and whiskers trimmed?

If people don't like hearing about our journey, they can unfriend me. Simples.

I think you are confusing boasting with just updating.

P

 

[PolarSkye]

Definitely counts - I love it when life deals you a hand like that occasionally!!

Ditto - and it's what I love about this sport. We were recently at a dressage comp with Dan Jocelyn, Tanya Cleverley and Rodney Powell in the same class (in a different section). They still proceeded to wipe the floor with us - despite Dan being on a VERY green, fresh-from-racing TB . . . but it was great fun to "compete" against them . . . or is that boasting .

P

 

[RunToEarth]

If people don't like hearing about our journey, they can unfriend me. Simples.

I think you are confusing boasting with just updating.

P

This. I'm genuinely happy with my lot most of the time, I have a lot of horsey friends on FB and I like to share things - even if it is just a photo of the boys looking nice.

I don't honestly care what people do with their horses if it doesn't impact on my life, delusions give us all a giggle but they rarely actually bother me. The only thing I am saddened by is when the horse suffers either from someone's lack of experienced or inflated ideas of their competence, which ultimately is damaging for both parties.

But we all have to have aspirations?

 

[RunToEarth]

I don't proclaim to be anything more than my username suggests so it might seem a bit odd to some and I don't have issues with people having dreams...but when you can't ride one side of your dope on a rope I highly doubt that you ar going to survive a walk/trot test let alone anything else.

Perhaps that is your problem - I would never comment on anyone's ability to ride western, because I have absolutely no idea what it entails, in the same way, by your own admission, as a happy hacker you may have absolutely no idea what it means to someone to go up a class showjumping.

The thing that I really dislike about the equine world is all the bitching and backbiting.

 

[TarrSteps]

The thing that I really dislike about the equine world is all the bitching and backbiting.

��

 

[slumdog]

Maybe that's why a lot of people do exaggerate, because in the horse world you're never good enough. I recently won my first 1.05 and afterwards one person said "yes but it was only unaffiliated" charming. And let's face it, general consensus is that if you win, the horse did it all for you, if you lose you can't ride. Horse people are nuts. Lol

 

[Elf On A Shelf]

Well I don't know about the people that you are all on about but I am perfect in every way!

My position is perfect, seat, legs, aids, hands et al are ALL perfect. My horses are psycotic exracers who I daren't let anyone else ride incase the person gets hurt! The can rodeo for Britain and tank off uncontrolably at any giveni moment but I can get them doing exactly as I ask them because I am jus so good!

I am an expert on anything and everything, I am a much, much better rider than Carl Hester, John Whittaker and Mark Todd all rolled into one!

I win every single time I compete, the odd times I don't it's because everyone else cheated!

I break and school all of my own and because I ride racehorses for a living I am instantly better than any of you lot and can ride quite literally any horse you throw my way!

P.S. 99% of the above is utter nonsense ... But which bits

 

[blitznbobs]

Well I don't know about the people that you are all on about but I am perfect in every way!

My position is perfect, seat, legs, aids, hands et al are ALL perfect. My horses are psycotic exracers who I daren't let anyone else ride incase the person gets hurt! The can rodeo for Britain and tank off uncontrolably at any giveni moment but I can get them doing exactly as I ask them because I am jus so good!

I am an expert on anything and everything, I am a much, much better rider than Carl Hester, John Whittaker and Mark Todd all rolled into one!

I win every single time I compete, the odd times I don't it's because everyone else cheated!

I break and school all of my own and because I ride racehorses for a living I am instantly better than any of you lot and can ride quite literally any horse you throw my way!

P.S. 99% of the above is utter nonsense ... But which bits

Are you my long lost twin - cos you just described me word for word...

 

[Equilibrium Ireland]

PS,spot on! I love Kali's adventures and getting to know their humans. And I really am genuinely happy for my FB friends achievements and love for their horses!

Terri

 

[Hoof_Prints]

I like to see people getting on well with their horses , good for them if they are succeeding ! It's when they talk crap and try to impress you with absolute rubbish. I knew a girl who used to sit next to me in class, she knew I had a pony that was off work due to a tendon injury so she'd get rid of her common accent for an hour and speak in an accent that would nominate her for the upperclass twit of the year award. She told me about how she was going to affiliate her new horse and go to arena uk all the time, going to get on various teams and how she spent £700 on a saddle, I knew the price tag of every item she owned and I was not impressed at all. Funny thing is, that 5 years later of posting photos of the poor thing forced in by draw reins, shes only just jumped a course on it. Why make up crap?! theres no shame in taking things slow and steady :S I have far more respect for someone that does, than someone like that

 

[PolarSkye]

PS,spot on! I love Kali's adventures and getting to know their humans. And I really am genuinely happy for my FB friends achievements and love for their horses!

Terri

Aww, thank you . . . and I feel the same about my horsey (and non) FB friends. It's lovely to read about (and in some cases actually see firsthand) their achievements, etc. I have friends and family scattered around the globe so FB is a great way to keep up with what they're doing/getting up to.

That said, I'm pretty picky about who I'm "friends" with on social media . . . I don't have much time for arrogant blowhards IRL or in cyberspace.

P

 

[Prince33Sp4rkle]

I try not to care, as long as their horse is treated properly. I do rather laugh at the 'post every day what I have done and what I have bought for my horse' on Facebook. However, I think it is a form of boasting.

I doubt it's intended that way so if you are taking it that way, it's probably your issue not theirs........I LOVE seeing what people are up to and so do 1000's of other people. It very simple to un friend or not follow a page.....

 

[el_Snowflakes]

I doubt it's intended that way so if you are taking it that way, it's probably your issue not theirs........I LOVE seeing what people are up to and so do 1000's of other people. It very simple to un friend or not follow a page.....

agree with PS..............

Same applies to those who constantly put up pics of their children. If you don't want to see it just hide it/unfriend. Theres nothing wrong of being proud of your achievements and true friends will be pleased for you.

 

[PolarSkye]

I doubt it's intended that way so if you are taking it that way, it's probably your issue not theirs........I LOVE seeing what people are up to and so do 1000's of other people. It very simple to un friend or not follow a page.....

Where's the Like button?

P

 

[Ibblebibble]

so what if people boast a little, if it's the truth and they have achieved something they have been striving for then good for them
I think what the OP was really about though was those who boast or go on about completely made up achievements or incidents, past or present and if we think about it, we probably all know at least one person who does this.

 

[blitznbobs]

This is a v british attitude - British people take 'I've done well today' as really meaning 'I've done better than you' or even 'I am better than you.' It doesn't... It means 'I've done well today.'

It is OK to recognise your own achievements and this attitude if not allowing people to do so smacks of insecurity... And probably harks back to low self esteem which is epidemic in the uk...

 

[abracadabra]

So funny...

Oh and horses wearing fly fringes in Unaff SJ..

I know right, everyone knows flies aren't a problem till you affiliate

 

[Roasted Chestnuts]

At the end of the day what is someone's boasting to you? Is it hurting you? Hurting your horse? How do you know what is going on in that persons life that they need a little bit of fantasy? For the person whose sharer was spouting, did you ever confront her and ask her to explain or stop? If not then maybe you should have, if my boy was being a Pratt according to others I'd be asking and investigating, not just getting upset but not saying anything. She could have been scared and the little things the youngster may have done, which perhaps weren't as bad as she made out to be still scared her but she felt silly admitting it.

You can spot those who are talking mince a mile away but you don't have to be nasty to them or behind their back. I'm pretty straight talking and it is what it is if it's harmless fibs then who cares, if they annoy you then don't talk to them, remove them from FB/twitter etc. I have no time for poop talkers or those whose horses suffer through ignorance or the 'little bit of knowledge' scenario but telling harmless fibs really isn't worth getting annoyed about.

 

[RunToEarth]

I doubt it's intended that way so if you are taking it that way, it's probably your issue not theirs........I LOVE seeing what people are up to and so do 1000's of other people. It very simple to un friend or not follow a page.....

Agree. I follow your fb page even though I loathe dressage - I like to see the boys wrapped up in different colours and it always fascinates me what new bits you find to put bling on. I think of it as a colourful daily education for someone whose favourite saddlecloth colour is black..!

 

[PaddyMonty]

So funny...
I know right, everyone knows flies aren't a problem till you affiliate

They certainly aren't a problem in the depth of winter indoors

 

[EventingMum]

A lot of people think that if they pretend their dreams are reality somehow it will all come true. I don't mind the odd childish boast and often hear a non horsey parent or partner boasting about how well their child or OH has done purely through ignorance e.g. the fences were huge - the 2' probably did look huge to them, or no one else got such a high dressage score at the event, they got 60 and the nearest to them was 46 - they clearly don't know how eventing scoring works.

The ones that worry me are those who convince more novice owners that they're very experienced and proceed to give out bad and sometimes dangerous advice or instruction. Round here the pinnacle of everyone's ambition seems to be to go to Blair 3 day event. I've lost count of the number of people I've heard of who are doing Blair this season, most are, for the umpteenth season, still doing BE 90 or 100 with little hope of going novice to enable them to qualify for CCI*. Somebody recently asked me about someone who is doing the rounds of local DIY yards and keeps saying they have been round Blair. Sadly other novice owners are hanging on every word and receiving some downright dangerous advice, this person has only done a few low level events without success (nothing to be ashamed of) but lies have elevated them to God like status with unsupassed knowledge of all things equine. Instances like this are when exaggeration becomes dangerous.