Rant about unsupportive HHO'ers

FionaM12 said:
Oh no! We seem to be saying much the same thing!? Are we a pack then? :cool:
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Of course you are. I shall call you Riona from now on.

If I have something critical to say and it has already been said multiple times then I tend to back away from the post. Repeating the same criticism over and over again has little benefit in my opinion.
 
I must say, I've had some extremely hurtful things said to me, in PMs and on threads. Most of the time it is just differing opinions, but people do take it far too far. I've seen people begging others to stop, but they just use the same line "It's a public forum, I can post what I like" while that's true, it's not nice at all!

Most of the members are really nice OP :) I hope you decide to stay!
 
This place has an awful reputation. Just type in Horse and Hound forums on google and you will find comments from people who have turned and ran given the attitude of some of the people that post on here.

IMO there is an element of users who act first and think later - they have internet warrior hats on and feel they are untouchable because they are in their houses posting from the safety of their own homes - I guarantee you that many of them would not utter a single syllable of their tough line responses if you were standing in front of them - because most of them would be punched square in the face if they talked to people like that in the outside world - but on the internet its ok cause they are safe. And when one does it, it just makes it easier for the rest to do it - I tend to avoid these kinds of threads as they serve no function other than to appease some peoples boredom and give them feelings of superiority and being part of "the gang" - its truly pathetic. I have disagreed with people on here but I take my time over my posts and I choose my words carefully - just because I disagree with you does not mean we cannot converse on other subjects - its called healthy debate. And I cannot understand for the life of me why anyone thinks that attacking someone is helpful in anyway shape of form.
 
TED2010 said:
If you think someone is being a 'div' then either don't comment or express your opinion in a kind but honest way. The person posting may not deliberately be being a 'div' they may not know any better and be asking for help or advice. Perhaps you think this forum should just be for professionals that already 'know it all'?

Think this thread is perfectly clear and reasonable
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The trouble nowadays is that nobody takes the time to read and learn even just the basic things before they jump in and buy a horse.

It's no wonder that some of us get cross at them; you wouldn't jump in a car if you couldn't drive it, why do the same sort of thing with a living breathing fantastic thing like a horse?
 
i dont post here very often [ havn't got a lot to say] BUT if i needed to know something- this is the forum i would choose, as there is a depth and breadth of knowledge here which doesnt exist on other horse forums - however , i f i was after a more cosy response there are other smaller forum i might choose:)
 
Maesfen said:
The trouble nowadays is that nobody takes the time to read and learn even just the basic things before they jump in and buy a horse.

It's no wonder that some of us get cross at them; you wouldn't jump in a car if you couldn't drive it, why do the same sort of thing with a living breathing fantastic thing like a horse?
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This.

I really try not to get mad and post in these instances, but I'm sorry it's not acceptable that some people go and buy or (even worse) 'rescue' horses, and then come on here moaning that they don't have enough money to get a vet when something goes wrong. And yes, I find it highly irritating when said people mention the fact that they have noticed their horse has been 'hopping' whilst ridden, and wonder if they should 'mention' it to the vet because friends have suggested 'something called navicular' (which they openly admit they have no idea what that is). Then they start going on a mission to 'rescue' another horse. That is downright irresponsible and other people/charities end up picking up the pieces. :mad:

And yes, I DO tell them this in real life too! ;-)
 
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Maesfen said:
The trouble nowadays is that nobody takes the time to read and learn even just the basic things before they jump in and buy a horse.

It's no wonder that some of us get cross at them; you wouldn't jump in a car if you couldn't drive it, why do the same sort of thing with a living breathing fantastic thing like a horse?
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I agree that it is not surprising that people get cross. However, I think that it is in the best interest of the horse to take a pragmatic approach. Maybe a poster should not have bought a horse, but they have. So why not deal with the status quo and share your knowledge and advice? Telling the owner that they are not suitable horse owners (however tempting) will not improve the horses situation, giving good advice hopefully will.

(by you I mean "one")
 
Maesfen said:
The trouble nowadays is that nobody takes the time to read and learn even just the basic things before they jump in and buy a horse.

It's no wonder that some of us get cross at them; you wouldn't jump in a car if you couldn't drive it, why do the same sort of thing with a living breathing fantastic thing like a horse?
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A-flipping-men.
Me being a fairly "blunt" person I just tend to say it as I see it.

But then I guess fault must also lay with the "suing" culture that has seen a full stop to kids learning basic horsemanship at the local stables/riding school for fear of an accident and the resulting lawsuit!
Nowadays it seems unless you were raised in a horse orientated environment, the only way to learn how to keep a horse is to read books and then buy one and hope trial and error isn't fatal for the animal in question!
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by amymay
Oh I have great sense of humour c on the c. Just not a very witty one.....

Cornish on the Cob said:
It would be nice to see it sometimes! :D
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:) Does it really make a difference if common sense and useful information isn't buttered up with an obvious sense of humour :confused:

Notice the smiley at the beginning of the sentence which means I do not intend this to be bitchy, patronising, or anything other than an innocent query.

Someone mentioned that post count matters, does it really? Who to? It just means that some people have long coffee breaks or boring evenings to fill. :)
 
I don't offer my opinion much as I'm not experienced enough! The only advice I can offer is what I have personally experienced, which is probably why others have advice, due to experiencing a certain problem themselves, but obviously they have dealt with that problem in a different way which is why the conflicting advice comes about. Its not right or wrong advice, just each persons own experience IMO.
 
I used to go on another forum. There were some interesting people and I learned a lot. Then it changed, no matter the problem all the replies seemed to be along the lines of "there there dear, go make a nice cup of tea, you'll feel better tomorrow". I got annoyed with it, felt the forum had become purely a place to moan and receive sympathy. So I left and came on here. I like it here. It's intelligent, opinionated debates. Plus a bit of silliness and the occasional row. Just like real life, only better, because I couldn't fit this many people in my flat.
 
I came on here to ask for advice when I took on loan a 17.3 monster who regularly tried to kill me - I had been out of horses for 20 odd years, and it wasn't perhaps the wisest of moves on my part. However, all I recieved on here was helpful comments and support. Everyone was great and have continued to be so over the years. I was reading back some of my posts from a couple of years ago when my old mare was fading before my eyes. Some replies were hard to read, not that they were nasty as such, but just straight forward and honest comments. At the time I am sure they upset me a bit, but I realised that the comments came from people with a wealth of experience and took them on board.

I have had an up and down relationship with horses since then, and of life in general, but have always felt supported, even by those who don't 'sugar coat' their opinions :D

It's not a bad place, this little forum of ours, and like all places with a wide range of ages and personalities, you will get a bit of agro from time to time. I like to think we are like a big family - we may occasionally bicker and fight amongst ourselves, but when an outsider attacks, or if one of us really really need help we all pull together. The support you can get on here is fantastic :)

Bah, I have been lead into a waffle again! But for those who have problems with the people on here, put the ones who really grate on user ignore and join in with the rest of us :)
 
joeanne said:
A-flipping-men.
Me being a fairly "blunt" person I just tend to say it as I see it.

But then I guess fault must also lay with the "suing" culture that has seen a full stop to kids learning basic horsemanship at the local stables/riding school for fear of an accident and the resulting lawsuit!
Nowadays it seems unless you were raised in a horse orientated environment, the only way to learn how to keep a horse is to read books and then buy one and hope trial and error isn't fatal for the animal in question!
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I am not sure what they teach in riding schools but I have had so called experienced riders come to exercise my horse for me and they weren't able to put a headcollar on the right way round let alone tack up correctly. Couldn't even clean tack as unable to take apart the bridle! When I learnt to ride as a child (a very very long time ago it has to be said) we used to have tack cleaning competitions to pull apart clean and put back together bridles and even driving harnesses. All good practise.
 
I think HHO in general is inclusive, help is always offered there are a few people who like to be mean, example of this is i posted in the vet area about how a horse i used to share had died asking for it to be explained as i had never seen a case of what he had, i got a few nice messages back and then a pm telling me that if i don't know about vet care i shouldn't have a horse. Sorry i share always want to learn but have been lucky not to have ill horses. I think everybody now a days knows what HHO is like you take the good with the little bits of bad and and you get a great support network. TBH its a giant yard and we all know what they are like.........

PS thats all for the help and advice i have been given so far, complete lifesavers.
 
Being the genius that I am, I have just worked it out.

Now there are exceptions to this rule, remember that before you start bullying me....


It seems to me that we have had a lot of new members of late.
I think it may be the more older or senior members - little legs, shils, Amy, me, and the rest of you old crows, that are accused of working in packs. Why? Because we know each others views so agree or disagree and know how far we can push it, maybe appearing rude.

Then, the newer members, don't know how to take us, we appear rude.
I can see how it happens. I can be a rude ****!

But, there are also those who really are just rude. They just rip my knitting quite frankly!
Take them outside and burn them....
 
I found the reply to the post about the fleece not just blunt but out and out nasty. There was no need for it.
I've laid awake listening to the howling wind and worrying that my natives would be cold.
I've had over 30 years with horses. I don't know everything and the day I do (know everything) and stop fussing about my horses I will hang up my riding hat and walk away.


I think there's a certain group of older teens who just get off on waltzing round this forum making stupid remarks because they have nothing better to do and like the attention they get.
 
JFTD said:
'fess up...

which one's which?! :confused:

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I'm the older, shorter, fatter one! :D:p
 
Crugeran Celt said:
Don't you think that if someone has asked a question, even if it is obvious to you they deserve a polite response. Yes, absolutely. :) I am sure when I put my first post on here regarding my little mare that there were experienced breeders out there that thought ' what is she doing having a foal knowing so little' but everyone has to start somewhere and as I said I had a lot of good advise and support when all went wrong. That's great, that tends to be the way things go on here when people are actually open to listening to and considering the advice they get without getting defensive. Very few people are being a div as you put it Everyone is a div sometimes and if you (or I) come on here and tell everyone about it we are likely to get what's coming to us with both barrels! and we all have to learn, you weren't born with your knowledge of horses you have learnt from other people who have obviously been willing to teach you and share their knowledge. Surely we all want anyone showing an interest in horses to learn to look after them as well as possible and that can only be achieved for a novice owner with the help and advise of more knowledgable horsey people. No harm in giving that advise in a nice polite way surely.
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All true, but I still don't think anybody should feel obligated to support other posters in behavior they don't approve of. I like that people on here aren't scared to say what they want to say and they usually phrase it in a way that is polite enough by my standards.
 
OFG said:
You say that but I was following a thread in CR earlier in the week and it's been very heavily modified by TFC :confused:

One persons replies have been deleted completely and any of their posts which were quoted have been deleted in others posts, so now if you read the thread it doesn't make sense.

I personally didn't see that it should have been modified in such an extreme way as what was said wasn't that bad, just showed the poster up to be a rather unprofessional business woman.

I have followed other threads too that end up getting deleted and the amount of people which have been 'banned' shocks me.

I am on another forum (not horse related) and there is far more moderation on here than on there, and on other forum there is 1 chap who looks after the whole site and he won't ban / modify.
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That will have been because someone reported the post/s. That's when TFC gets involved :cool:
 
My experience of HHO has been pretty much 100% supportive. I'm sure I post some threads that don't have much/any response, but I don't really take that personally.

This whole bullying/clique/sheep thing makes me laugh though. I'm going to post a question now and give my answer. Now, quite clearly, anyone agreeing with me will either be a sheep or in my clique. If anyone dare disagree they are a bully. Who wants to join in??

My question.....

Is the Pope Catholic?

My answer.....

Yes.

Your turn. :p:)
 
Maesfen said:
The trouble nowadays is that nobody takes the time to read and learn even just the basic things before they jump in and buy a horse.

It's no wonder that some of us get cross at them; you wouldn't jump in a car if you couldn't drive it, why do the same sort of thing with a living breathing fantastic thing like a horse?
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So true. And then when they ask, which of course we all want them to do as that is how people learn, and they are told the correct answer by multiple, knowledgeable people ( and I don't count myself in this at all!) it isn't what they want to hear and they pull the bullying card.

I love the forum. It cheers me up when I'm cross or sad and there are loads of people on here that I feel I could turn to for advice in a real bind. Mind you, I might PM them these days as I know who's opinions I value and I can do without the aggro of a post in NL :p
 
Oh b0ll0cks, you can all stick it up your @rses.


Cricket, as I being rude.


Please remember some of us have rather weird sense of humours. Not trying to be rude, just unhinged.
 
guido16 said:
Oh b0ll0cks, you can all stick it up your @rses.


Cricket, as I being rude.


Please remember some of us have rather weird sense of humours. Not trying to be rude, just unhinged.
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Ermm.... explain please? :confused: Don't understand. especially the middle bit about cricket.

Or am I being dim? :o:o
 
nikicb said:
My question.....

Is the Pope Catholic?

My answer.....

Yes.

Your turn. :p:)
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ahhh i think you'll find it was the bear who was catholic,
the pope does something in the woods which can't be mentioned:D:p


And Guido, i'm never sure if you're slightly unhinged or just completely off your trolley!!!:eek:
 
FionaM12 said:
Ermm.... explain please? :confused: Don't understand. especially the middle bit about cricket.

Or am I being dim? :o:o
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Your being a div. a total div. so I can be rude to you now.

Idiot, clearly I meant crikey, not cricket, that is an English stupid game, like Morris dancing, another stupid game.


Oh ****e, am I being racist. Oh well. Your a div
 
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