Turned away due to my weight :(

As an aside, my sister is about 5'5/6, and she was at one point 18 stone, however she never looked 18 stone. I might have said she was a size 12 but she was actually a size 16. She's lost loads of weight and now I can see that she had been over weight, she carried it well and just looked like a pretty, fuller curvy girl
 
I know how embarrassing and upsetting this is to you. I had a similar situation when I went for a helicoptor ride!

I know you say you are happy with your weight, but why not take this as the ideal time and reason to lose a little? Your health will be ultimately suffering and you will be more agile and able to ride much more flexibly if you loss two or so stone.
I am not saying you NEED to lose weight, but it will be good for you all round.

Obviously, as you are happy with your weight, this is just a passing thought, and not to be taken wrongly. I honestly mean no offence.
 
I wasn't sure if it was a Troll or not. I thought it was to start with but then when you think about it, I personally see quite a few morbidly obese people riding on facebook. Cantering around and galloping down the beach etc-one of them on a very fat cob.
 
OP, I'm sorry that you feel people are being unkind, but in some ways they have your best interests at heart. My mother is classed as morbidly obese, she is the same height as you, and nearly 3 stone lighter. She has been referred to the gym by her GP, and is trying to lose weight. At one point she was a bit heavier still, she still says she has only lost a bit of weight, but she feels so much better.
My father recently lost 6 stone, he changed his diet, and walks 3 miles a day, he has knackered knees so that is it for exercise, and he has done it.
I would take the instructor up on her offer, it would be a great opportunity for anyone, and stand you in excellent stead when you do take the plunge and move into horse ownership. I wouldn't suggest that before losing some weight, as you think the forum is cruel, livery yards can be even worse!
Good luck OP, take this as a maybe not so nice wake up call, but let this be the beginning of the rest of your life.
 
I often find it rather strange when certain people join this forum. They post a thread which some people are likely to take a strong stance over, get upset at the minority of responses, come out with something absurd, then come back telling us they're giving up totally ... based solely on the responses from forum members that they only just spoke to for the first time in their lives. Very odd behaviour if you ask me. How on earth do some people get through real life if they have to have a forum of unknown strangers to help them make decisions :confused3:
 
hollybear said:
What an absolutely absurd comment.

Lady25 i am the same height as you and also feel hefty at 10 st, normally around 9st.

OP you've had some very good advise, please take it for the sake of any horse you may ride.
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Yes, exactly - I definitely do not have an eating disorder (unless that's eating too much and consuming more wine than I should) :) I know I should eat less and exercise more and I have lost over 1 and a half stone (well that was several years ago). I could not believe I was ever that big (11.10) and I was appalled when size 12 clothes got tight!

You KNOW when you're too heavy but people are in denial and often are quick to blame everyone and everything else. However, it is down to that individual to do something about their weight. It's not rocket science (eat less, exercise more = weight loss). It's unhealthy to be overweight and you put stress on your own body and organs. Why you would want to plonk that weight on a horse I am not sure.

There is no way I would ride a fine-boned horse or anything below 14:2 (and it would have to be a full up 14.2 at that), it's just unfair.

I am still on the fence as to whether this post is for real. I am not sure why, something just doesn't seem 100% genuine. Given themselves that username for a start. If it is then hopefully the OP has been given the jolt they need to improve their lifestyle.
 
Hellooooo op ..I just wanted to ad ..yes some people r harsh and hide behind there computers ..but there r also nice people ..I was wondering what part of the country r u ? ..if u r close to me ..we can always use an extra pair on hands around the yard .. Ok u may be a Little heavy to ride them ATM BUT that is something that can be worked on ..I have lost a stone in 6 weeks .. Just eating differently and doing a little more .. Poo picking is good ..as is pulling the sides on the school in ..as is walk the kids on the ponies .. So u will get back in the saddle !! U can lose a stone or two .. You can enjoy horses like anyone else !! Horses r not for the super skinny ,super rich , they r for everybody to enjoy !! The best thing about animals in they don't judge people ..they like and trust people on how they r treated not by who gets is size 6 jeans or has £100000 in the bank or who looks the prettiest etc etc unlike PEOPLE .. Please please please don't give up !! Pm me if u want to chat ;)
 
Lambkins said:
Hellooooo op ..I just wanted to ad ..yes some people r harsh and hide behind there computers ..but there r also nice people ..I was wondering what part of the country r u ? ..if u r close to me ..we can always use an extra pair on hands around the yard .. Ok u may be a Little heavy to ride them ATM BUT that is something that can be worked on ..I have lost a stone in 6 weeks .. Just eating differently and doing a little more .. Poo picking is good ..as is pulling the sides on the school in ..as is walk the kids on the ponies .. So u will get back in the saddle !! U can lose a stone or two .. You can enjoy horses like anyone else !! Horses r not for the super skinny ,super rich , they r for everybody to enjoy !! The best thing about animals in they don't judge people ..they like and trust people on how they r treated not by who gets is size 6 jeans or has £100000 in the bank or who looks the prettiest etc etc unlike PEOPLE .. Please please please don't give up !! Pm me if u want to chat ;)
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PM her Lambkins...she is picking them up. :)
 
JFTD said:
Bit harsh. Out of all the posters on this thread, FionaM12 is one of the most consistently nice and considerate.

IMHO, natch.
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lighten up JFTD

Fiona and I had a fun post the other day on a thread and I said I would owe her cookies and chocolate, this is having a lend of her and she will know it :p.
I was teasing her, this was by any means being mean, I was/am actually in favour of all she wrote in a sympathetic and companionate manner.:)

Me saying I was surprised is because I was thinking she seemed sweeter and kinder than normal meaning my hot chocolate had an effect on her as I made it with 4 teaspoons of sugar.
 
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goldenmint said:
hollybear said:
What an absolutely absurd comment.

Lady25 i am the same height as you and also feel hefty at 10 st, normally around 9st.

OP you've had some very good advise, please take it for the sake of any horse you may ride.[/QUOTE


I can 100% guarantee my comment was not absurd.
You need to learn that people on the internet are just that and we all have jobs,lives etc and may know more about certain things than you. Instead of being a keyboard warrior and showing your ignorance learn to let other people who might know more than you have an opinion.

The OP does need to loose weight and has been given some very good advice, comments of how people feel hefty at 10 stone is just ridiculous and only made for attention.
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So let me get this straight goldenmint, are you seriously suggesting that anyone who feels too heavy at 10st has an eating disorder?
Thats utterly ludicrous, I don't care who you are, that is just a ridiculous statement!
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Troll or not, this post has raised a very real issue which affects a lot if people. Even if the op is a troll, there have probably been some people who are struggling with this sort of problem who have looked at some of the posts and been made to feel like a big steaming pile of the proverbial. Most people can rationalise that this is an online forum and not to take too much notice of the unhelpful, rude posts. However, there are some people who are a little more sensitive. I just feel that if you can't say anything constructive then don't say anything at all. We can't always be nicey nicey, but there is no need to be mean. Let's face it, when you're on an internet forum there is very little you can do to find out whether anyone at all is genuine. You just have to take posts as you find them IMO, most will be harmless - although there will obviously br the occasional exception to this rule. For the most part, this is a very interesting and informative forum, which I get a lot from. It is a shame when threads decline as this one has because it over shadows the useful, well intentioned posts.

OP, for what it's worth, I really hope that you manage to lose your weight and get back to riding. Please don't take the hurtful words of a few to heart. As others have said, you have a great opportunity in front of you here, please don't waste it. I hope we get a thread from you in a few weeks/months saying that you have lost weight and are well on your way back to the saddle feeling happier and healthier than ever :)
 
OP...I genuinely feel for you and can imagine how disheartening the whole thing must be. BUT good can come from this if you look at the situation more positively. Your RI has given you a golden opportunity imo.
Im 5ft 11 and 15stone...most people are stunned if I tell them my weight because although I dont look particularly slim I also dont look my weight. Im in the process of trying to lose a couple of stone as I dont feel comfortable at this weight.
If you have been truely put off by comments on this form then possibly the horse world would be a difficult place for you, this forum is childs play compared to what some livery yards can be like..!!!!
I really hope you will rethink things, horses are fantastically enjoyable for everyone but they require work and commitment in many different ways. Only you can decide if you have the inclination to work at it. I wish you all the best xx
 
OP this could really give you the incentive to lose a couple of stone. Wish I could lose some weight but my horse is a very heavy sect D and I am sure even at my weight of 10st he doesn't know I am there!! good luck and it could be really worthwhile learning the ground work whilst you loose the weight, good luck.
 
I got turned away from a riding school once because I weighed more than 11.5 stone. they said I could go for a hack but not have a lesson, which made no sense to me!
 
FionaM12 said:
If that's true it's the most depressing thing I've read for a while. I truly pity any vulnerable person in your "care". You should be ashamed of your comments on this thread. Please don't bother to reply, I'm leaving this thread and putting you in UI so I won't have to see any more of your posts.

I have rarely felt so disgusted with anyone here.
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Agreed so glad not my counsellor
 
Spring Feather said:
I often find it rather strange when certain people join this forum. They post a thread which some people are likely to take a strong stance over, get upset at the minority of responses, come out with something absurd, then come back telling us they're giving up totally ... based solely on the responses from forum members that they only just spoke to for the first time in their lives. Very odd behaviour if you ask me. How on earth do some people get through real life if they have to have a forum of unknown strangers to help them make decisions :confused3:
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Quite agree. Shouldn't matter what anyone says, if you want something bad enough then you fight to achieve it. If a few comments make you give up then you were never really committed in the first place.
 
OP I think a good way to look at it is breaking it down into the bio-mechanics of it, both for you and the horse involved. When the "average" (I use that term loosely, whats average anyway?!) person walks up a set of stairs they exert 4 times their own weight on their knee joint to pull themselves up, i.e. pushing 76 stone based on the info you've given. Ouch! I imagine its a fairly similar ratio when say rising trot, so the knees must be taking a punishing. Add our weight on to that of the horse and if going up hills, inclines, round the corners in the school thats a fair amount of punishing that'll take on the joints. I had to retire my boy due to joint problems and later PTS and it was heartbreaking. I'd grab the opportunity presented to you by your instructor with both hands, and maybe help to muck out or other yard jobs...believe me you'll work up a sweat in no time. I don't think looking at buying your own horse as a novice would be a sensible option at this stage but think that broadening your experience and putting your health first would be a really good first step. Whilst you may feel fine in yourself now, think in 20 or 30 years or so? Very best of luck and wish you well in your endeavours - don't give up due to a few unhelpful comments, nice horsey people are abound!
 
hollybear said:
goldenmint said:
So let me get this straight goldenmint, are you seriously suggesting that anyone who feels too heavy at 10st has an eating disorder?
Thats utterly ludicrous, I don't care who you are, that is just a ridiculous statement!
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It would be someone to keep an eye on/have a good chat with yes.
Obviously going by the guidelines we have been trained to.
It doesn't bother me if you laugh I just hope you never have to change that opinion as it means you haven't had to be educated in eating disorders.

The only reason someone would put on a thread like this about being hefty at 10 stone is for attention.
I think the OPs weight issues are a little more important than being 10 stone at 5'7 don't you? And to have posters rub it in is a little unfair.
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I didn't read it as attention seeking, or rubbing it in. You do seem to have a rather strange view Goldenmint!

Your last post is as strange as your first one.

I say that as someone who knows a good deal about ED, can't help feeling you are reading a little too much into it.
 
Over the years I have seen numerous very pretty, slender women wailing about how "fat" they are or bemoaning their "horrible" hair and features, and I have been sure that compared to them I look like The Honey Monster or Hagrid from Harry Potter. I've usually presumed this behaviour stems from insecurity and they want reassurance, it doesn't cost anything after all, so I usually give it even if sometimes I am inwardly rolling my fat eyeballs when I am reassuring them for the umpteenth time that yes they look stunning, they really do.

Also, not that I would know, but if you're used to being 8 stone and a size 6 it can probably can feel weird to put on weight and be 10 stone and a size 10
 
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i weigh 9 st 10 and my bmi is 23.8 my bone structure is tiny and i am carrying weight i could do without. i do not however have an eating disorder... this is a strange thought to me ( unless eating a lot of ice cream is an eating disorder) if this is the guidance you are working to then that guidance needs rewriting...
 
goldenmint said:
hollybear said:
It would be someone to keep an eye on/have a good chat with yes.
Obviously going by the guidelines we have been trained to.
It doesn't bother me if you laugh I just hope you never have to change that opinion as it means you haven't had to be educated in eating disorders.

The only reason someone would put on a thread like this about being hefty at 10 stone is for attention.
I think the OPs weight issues are a little more important than being 10 stone at 5'7 don't you? And to have posters rub it in is a little unfair.
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This is daft. I'm 5ft7 and about 10.5 stone and I would love to loose a stone or so, I'm not fat or overweight by any means but I'm not at my best and have a little muffin top when I wear size 10 jeans. I don't think my feeling this way means I have an eating disorder? I have a packet of cookies next to me and munched out on Chinese for breakfast...oops! ;-)
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It's how you feel personally. I'm a touch under 5ft 4 and just over 8.5 stone. I feel a bit hefty as I used to be 7.5 stone and fit, so now I don't feel as good as I did. I feel "blobby"! But I know I'm not fat so don't have an eating disorder, I just feel better when I am lighter.
 
goldenmint said:
hollybear said:
It would be someone to keep an eye on/have a good chat with yes.
Obviously going by the guidelines we have been trained to.
It doesn't bother me if you laugh I just hope you never have to change that opinion as it means you haven't had to be educated in eating disorders.

The only reason someone would put on a thread like this about being hefty at 10 stone is for attention.
I think the OPs weight issues are a little more important than being 10 stone at 5'7 don't you? And to have posters rub it in is a little unfair.
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Oh dear, this is going from the bizarre to the ridiculous. By these criteria, me and lots of my (healthy) friends are on the verge of succumbing to an eating disorder.
As you can see by the link http://www.nhs.uk/Livewell/healthy-living/Pages/height-weight-chart.aspx, its perfecly normal for someone of 5'7" to be well under 9st and for someone accustomed to being that weight then 10st will seem heavy.
I myself am 5'6" and usually weigh around 9st, again perfectly normal, and if I go up to 10st then I feel as though I'm carrying too much weight.
You cannot possibly just choose an arbitary weight and state that anyone worried about being that weight is in danger, I say again it is ludicrous!
As for attention seeking and 'rubbing it in' well words fail me........
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Hi jellybabie, I haven't read all the comments but as with any forum you will encounter all sorts of people, some supportive and some downright nasty!
Get involved with lots of yard duties, no better way to loose weight than looking after horses. I have struggled with my weight but my incentive was to shift the weight to ride my horse, he was backed last year by my daughter and I was determined to be able to ride him. Pick yourself up, dust yourself off, one finger up to the nasties and enjoy those neddies, you will be in the saddle before you know it!
 
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