Who pays? Trailer dilemma

BSL

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Apart from the small matter that the trailer wouldn't have been on the road, and therefore wouldn't have picked up the thorn, if the OP hadn't given her friend a lift.

This thread utterly reinforces why I no longer give lifts, lend stuff etc...

Have to agree with you. Going to have to stop reading this thread as getting frustrated lol. Would be interesting to know who's a borrower and who's a lender..
 

peaceandquiet1

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We had neighbours who fell out with us after they broke our JCB which they had borrowed for months and then got miffed when we refused to lend our lawnmower......it was nice of you to take her and I think she could have offered to contribute a bit in the interests of goodwill etc.
 

Mongoose11

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Apart from the small matter that the trailer wouldn't have been on the road, and therefore wouldn't have picked up the thorn, if the OP hadn't given her friend a lift.

This thread utterly reinforces why I no longer give lifts, lend stuff etc...

OPs decision to give the lift!

Had I been the friend I would have insisted on paying or at least half. I still don't think the friend should have to or is responsible.

Like people have said, what about engine trouble on the way?
 

Pedantic

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Doesn't sound much of a friend if she didn't offer something towards the tyre, you have learnt a valuable lesson, let people sort out their own transport at "their" expense. NOA.
 

Pedantic

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When are people going to wake up to the fact that fuel money doesn't cover it, there is the extra wear on the towing vehicle such as tyres, service interval comes round quicker, more mileage on the vehicle devalues it etc ,then the wear and tare on the trailer as well, tight arsed friends ain't friends.
 

Tiddlypom

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OPs decision to give the lift!

Like people have said, what about engine trouble on the way?
Engine trouble would most likely have occured on the OP's next trip regardless of whether she was giving a lift or not. The thorn was picked up on a journey that the OP would not have done if she wasn't transporting her friend.

I doubt that the OP will give anyone a lift again.

Revealing thread :(.
 

Ceifer

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Going to upset the apple cart. To me friendship shouldn't come down to the sake of 45 quid. I'm not loaded ( my horse eats my money haha) but you did her a favour, you said you didn't mind and you enjoyed the day.

Take the fact you did a good thing and what goes around comes around, one day she might be doing you a favour.
 

Sukistokes2

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When I've been taken anywhere I have always paid over the odds, just to cover things like this. I borrow a friends school, I always pay a small contribution but then that's me. A lot of people don't understand the costs involved, the hidden costs. If it was not mentioned then I wouldn't expect them to pay, but then I wouldn't be taking them anywhere again. It's not her fault and not her damage but it never hurts to offer. If you want a contribution ask, if not don't
 

RollOnSpring

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Thanks for all your replies. Think I'm going to ask her for the money. If i could afford it then I wouldn't, but I've had to put the cost on my credit card. I'm newly divorced, lumbered with a house I can barely afford and my horse is out on full loan. Will be selling the trailer shortly if things don't pick up on the work front.
 
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SplashofSoy

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If I was you're friend I would have paid for the tyre in these circumstances. Its not worth falling out over but if you are not happy with risk of incurring additional costs don't offer lifts again. I know plenty of people who wouldn't due to the problems it can cause. Before I could tow I often got lifts but with someone who was going too so would split costs and I would pay more than half. Now I hire the yard owners trailer formally. If my horse breaks something or I damaged it then I pay for damage. Wear and tear is the yard owners responsibility. Tyre would be mine if there was a thorn but a slow puncture or old tyre its the yo's but I wouldn't argue if asked to pay £45 to keep everything happy.
 
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Mongoose11

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Oh FGS. You're acting like people have just admitted they're a bunch of homophobic racists :rolleyes3:

You could spin it the other way and say if you were that much of a good friend you'd say "Don't be daft. We had a good day together and this is just one of those things".

My name is Mongoose11 and I take responsibility for my own decisions and belongings.

Apparently that means that I'm a bad person.

This IS a very revealing thread. It suggests a number of posters may be of the 'where there's blame there's a claim' variety.

You're suggesting this shows me in a bad light but it means I would be the trailer owner not charging their friend for the tyre. Wouldn't dream of it. Those who would are the 'better' people? How does that work?
 
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Sussexbythesea

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I had a lorry and gave plenty of my friends lifts and I would never expect them to have paid for a tyre. I don't think you're much of a friend to be honest. If their horse had damaged the lorry that would have been totally different.
 

Equine_Dream

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Absolutely.

Fair play doesn't seem to be high on the agenda for many, they just seem to want to take it all without any responsibility for their actions, beggar the consequences.

I think that's very unfair. I certainly agree people should take responsibility for their actions however the flat tyre was the result of a thorn which could have been anywhere on any day. It is certainly not the responsibility of the OPs friend. The OP could have easily picked it up anywhere.
As for those saying people should account for wear and tear on others vehicle I'm sorry I find that totally OTT. Do you always ask friends and family to make contributions towards the upkeep of your car whenever they have the privilege of a lift. I find this attitude very petty tbh :/
 
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Maesfen

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I think it's a case where we're all different; some have morals and some don't. It's just a case of do as you'd like to be done to, especially to a 'friend'.

I like to be able to sleep at night with a clear conscience; it obviously doesn't bother a lot of you.
 

TheSylv007

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Personally I wouldn't expect her to pay. It's a normal risk whenever you take a vehicle out. If you had given a friend a lift in your car and the car got a puncture, would you expect them to replace the tyre then?

However, it would be a nice gesture if she offered a contribution.
 

BSL

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After reading this thread, I think I am going to sell my truck that tows, sell my trailer, cancel the insurance on both, tell the mechanic that services both, I won't be needing him any longer, save myself a fortune and go and scrounge a lift off anyone who is going my way. Obviously I shall offer to share fuel costs:)
 

Sussexbythesea

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No just taking a day off work to take her somewhere she wouldn't otherwise be able to go, just because I know she can do well and wanted to be supportive. No, not much of a friend at all.

But isn't that what friends do? They don't then usually go onto a forum and complain about them afterwards. It's just bad luck your tyre went flat.

It's weird how funny people get over horse boxes and trailers that they wouldn't do over a car.
 

Ceifer

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Thanks for all your replies. Think I'm going to ask her for the money. If i could afford it then I wouldn't, but I've had to put the cost on my credit card. I'm newly divorced, lumbered with a house I can barely afford and my horse is out on full loan. Will be selling the trailer shortly if things don't pick up on the work front.

OP. You didn't mention this in your original post. If you are struggling, just ask her to contribute and be honest. If you can admit to us lot, a friend should be easier.

You must be under a lot of stress and pressure. This is something small, but maybe because of everything else it seems bigger?
 

Roasted Chestnuts

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Nope id take it on the chin. One of those things, could have happened at any point.

OP those things you are going through aren't your friends fault and if you are really that skint then perhaps you should put the trailer up For sale, I'm sure that will more than pay for the tyre. Your tough times aren't your friends fault. I fell in hard times and everything had to go including my two horses. One I sold and one went on loan 300+ miles away.

I wouldn't be surprised if your friend tells you where to go.
 

Lyle

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If I was the lender, I wouldn't expect the lendee to pay, however I would expect them to offer. If the shoe was on the other foot, and I was the lendee, I'd be stuffing the cash into the lenders hand! I think OP, knowing your situation (which a friend should be aware of) she should pay at least half.
 

rachk89

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Thanks for all your replies. Think I'm going to ask her for the money. If i could afford it then I wouldn't, but I've had to put the cost on my credit card. I'm newly divorced, lumbered with a house I can barely afford and my horse is out on full loan. Will be selling the trailer shortly if things don't pick up on the work front.

If you are going to ask her for the money i wouldn't mention the fact that you are lacking in money right now because of lack of work. I mean you took a day off work to help her if you need the work then you maybe should have declined taking her or maybe just let her borrow the trailer and she towed it or got someone else to tow it.

She may not see that as a good reason to be honest and you may just end up with an argument.
 

RollOnSpring

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OP. You didn't mention this in your original post. If you are struggling, just ask her to contribute and be honest. If you can admit to us lot, a friend should be easier.

You must be under a lot of stress and pressure. This is something small, but maybe because of everything else it seems bigger?

Yeah you're probably right. When you're fed up, the smallest things can feel massive. The friend does know all this about my life, we had just planned a nice day out really at this show - her to do well on her horse and me to get away from it all for the day.

I honestly wouldn't be bothered about the money if I had it, I really wouldn't. I like doing things for people and making them happy. It's just hard to grit your teeth when you're absolutly skint. I know I'll get through it, I've got through worse, but it just doesn't feel nice that's all.
 

RollOnSpring

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If you are going to ask her for the money i wouldn't mention the fact that you are lacking in money right now because of lack of work. I mean you took a day off work to help her if you need the work then you maybe should have declined taking her or maybe just let her borrow the trailer and she towed it or got someone else to tow it.

She may not see that as a good reason to be honest and you may just end up with an argument.

She doesn't drive and no one else at her yard offered to take her. I had a holiday day so u get paid the same whether its taken it or not. Only said it to point out I took the day off to hemp her out, didn't mean that was the reason I'm short of money.

Teailer will be going up for sale once I find my feet with the rest of the bomb that's just gone off in my life. My immediate expensive day to day things have gone; horse, second car etc. Trailer was just sitting there not costing anything but it will be sold in due course.
 

Fiona

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I think it would be different OP if you were going anyway on your own horse..

However you weren't, so the trailer would have been sitting at home.

I would definitely have offered a contribution to the new tyre if I were your friend. .

Fiona
 
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