why do people feel the need to prolong a suffering horses life???

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miss_wilson

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I have just moved to a new yard which i love! however......... there is a 30 year old horse who can barely walk! she is in most of the time and lies down a lot! however...... she can only get up when she is lying on one side, when she gets on her bad side she becomes stuck, struggles, panics to the point where she is pouring with sweat, breathing heavily and very distressed!! the owner then have to manually try and roll her over so she can get up!!!! horiffic i know!! yesterday she was on the wrong side when i arrived in the morning the owner was sat next to her in the stable, she said that no-one on the yard wants to help anymore as they say its cruel of her, obv i said i didnt want to see the horse suffer anymore and that i would help if necessary!

what i dont get is how can you look at your beloved horse in that state and believe it has any quaility of life? its purely for selfish reasons she is still alive!

People on yard have advised its time to pts, rspca also been called but nothing they can do.

Makes me and other liveries very sad :mad:
 
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Poor horse, I do wonder though if it might be happier out in the field 24/7 so it doesn't stiffen up? Obviously depends on the severity of the arthritis.

We have kept old ones going in the past, when maybe others would have pts, but they were all capable of eating, cantering, lying down (and getting up!) and were generally happy in themselves right up until the end.
 
Maybe someone needs to uncover why the owner is keeping this horse alive - there may be a very powerful psychological reason why she needs it. For example I know someone who kept a very old horse going because the horse had been a gift from her late husband shortly before he died and she felt that letting the horse go broke her last link to him.
Instead of judging the owner, try chatting sympathetically to her and then maybe it will become easier for her to see that she needs to do right by her mare.
 
It's very hard to witness things like this. I suppose everyone has their own idea of when "the right time" to pts is. I've seen examples of people hanging onto pets when it seems clear to me the kind thing would have been to make the decision ages ago. It makes me sad, even cross, but it's their animal and their decison. :(

However, a word of warning. It's not hard to recognise people on here, and if you love this yard, you could make things hard for yourself if someone sees your post and is upset about it.
 
dreamcometrue said:
Probably because the pain you feel afterwards is so deep and lasts so long it is unbearable.
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Well that is a very selfish reason.
When you choose to get a horse, you should bear in mind, what an old farmer friend of mine used to say , "If you've got livestock, you'll have deadstock". If you can't cope with that, you shouldn't have any animal.
 
dreamcometrue said:
Probably because the pain you feel afterwards is so deep and lasts so long it is unbearable.
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Not half as long or half as unbearable as it would be if you don't make the right decision before it's an agony-filled crisis for the horse.

ETA and if you STILL think your pain is worse than that which you might make your horse suffer, then no, you shouldn't own one.
 
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It's selfishness I had someone say to me the day after I had my beloved horse PTS I could never My horse put to sleep I must love him far that you do yours I nearly hit her I could not believe my ears.
It's putting them first I am definatly in the better a month to early than a day to late camp and it sounds if that poor mare is well over the day to late I would find that very hard OP but you were right to help the YO.
 
I'm glad I have stumbled across this thread as I have recently had the TB I 'rescued' from dying of starvation pts. It was an horrific situation to be in and I could have quite easily kept him alive for another 10yrs + but I could not have been sure he'd have been pain free. Luckily for me I had a very sensible vet who told me I couldnt be sentimental and needed to think of the horse.... not many would have done that, they'd have taken my money every month for his analgesia and kept him alive..
So why do ppl feel the need to prolong suffering?, because the grief, and guilt, is suffocating.... and the empty feeling afer the deed is unbearable.
I can only give my personal opinion, my horses welfare was paramount, and if it meant that he had to die to be painfree then that is what had to happen and now I deal with my, and my families grief...
*Incase your wondering 'Ted' was pts due to an horrific case of kissing spine, the fact he was uninsurable due to his overall condition, and because I simply have not got a blank cheque... I know now why he was emaciated, the more weight he put on, the worse his pain....
sorry if i've taken over the thread x
 
My oldie is 28, she lies down rarely, but can still get up, so obviously finds it more difficult now. She chased my younger horse up the field, bucking and leaping, winding the others up the auld beggar that she is.
For some the fact she has been retired 4 years and rarely goes down now would be enough to pts, but when i see her wellying up that field ...... Nope, theres life in the auld bird yet.
I hope i can be strong when her time comes, ive done it with others and howled for days, but i can understand not wanting to let go, but not if the horse is distressed or in pain
 
What I meant is that some people cannot put this upon themselves. Some people are weaker than others. It takes a lot of strength to even phone the vet and give the word.

I hope you weren't calling me selfish. I assure you I am not and I am paying the price every day.
 
I had my cat put to sleep a few weeks ago. I haven't slept properly since. I get 4hrs sleep on a good night. I have never had to make the choice before and watching her die was horrific. I have started having terrifying dreams and even though it was the right time, I feel awful.
It is the hardest choice people have to make, I think. Instead of blaming them, I think you should try and have a heart to heart with the owner. I know it will be tough and I don't think I could do it, but I bet they're hurting inside and need someone to be there for them.

How old are they, out of interest?
 
Dreamscometrue that is no reason to keep your horse suffering. I put my horse to sleep and took some time off work to cope with it but would never off kept her going for my selfish reasons because I couldn't bare it.
Pearlsasinger that's true and as hard as it is putting your horse to sleep and I do know iv been there you need to do right by your horse. I stayed with my mare until the end after a big hug from my vet to keep my going but she told me in her own way she wanted to go and I respected that.
 
Nah said:
I had my cat put to sleep a few weeks ago. I haven't slept properly since. I get 4hrs sleep on a good night. I have never had to make the choice before and watching her die was horrific. I have started having terrifying dreams and even though it was the right time, I feel awful.
It is the hardest choice people have to make, I think. Instead of blaming them, I think you should try and have a heart to heart with the owner. I know it will be tough and I don't think I could do it, but I bet they're hurting inside and need someone to be there for them.

How old are they, out of interest?
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I am sorry about your cat mine is still with us but very thin she's eating ( being sick quite a bit) she's sitting beside me now purring .
Just think about all the lovely times you had with yours and how lucky she was to have a home with you .
 
dreamcometrue said:
What I meant is that some people cannot put this upon themselves. Some people are weaker than others. It takes a lot of strength to even phone the vet and give the word.

I hope you weren't calling me selfish. I assure you I am not and I am paying the price every day.
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I took your first post to mean that you had had a horse pts and were finding it hard to get over, so not selfish.

However, I do think that it is selfish to get a horse, or any other animal, if you are not prepared to put its interest before your own. Qulity of life should be paramount, not quantity. Marydoll, it sounds to me as though your mare still has a good quality of life and I'm sure you will know when she no longer has that.
 
I think people can't bear the thought of losing said animal. It is so hard to decide but some people don't seem to take quality of life into the equation, they think more along the lines of quantity of life... In your case it sounds like their emotional attachment to the horse is clouding their view of the real situation and the fact the old horse is suffering.
 
I think people do it because, whatever excuse they use, it comes down to the fact they'd rather put their own feelings before the horses. Only exception is perhaps when the owner has a mental disability, which I imagine is quite rare.
 
I have not read all replies but some people really cannot put an animal out of its suffering they would rather let it struggle on and die.

I had never come across this as we were always taught it is not right to let anything suffer, however have recently been involved where animals were being kept alive in a dire situation with no hope of recovery and we could not get across to the owner that it was better to pts.

In the end we had to step in very strongly but the owner still did not seem to grasp we had done the right thing,kept saying given the choice animal would rather be alive, even when we explained yes but not when suffering and going to die anyway.

I think you just have to consider some people do not think in a sane rational way and end it that or it will drive you mad.
 
showaddy1 said:
I'm glad I have stumbled across this thread as I have recently had the TB I 'rescued' from dying of starvation pts. It was an horrific situation to be in and I could have quite easily kept him alive for another 10yrs + but I could not have been sure he'd have been pain free. Luckily for me I had a very sensible vet who told me I couldnt be sentimental and needed to think of the horse.... not many would have done that, they'd have taken my money every month for his analgesia and kept him alive..
So why do ppl feel the need to prolong suffering?, because the grief, and guilt, is suffocating.... and the empty feeling afer the deed is unbearable.
I can only give my personal opinion, my horses welfare was paramount, and if it meant that he had to die to be painfree then that is what had to happen and now I deal with my, and my families grief...
*Incase your wondering 'Ted' was pts due to an horrific case of kissing spine, the fact he was uninsurable due to his overall condition, and because I simply have not got a blank cheque... I know now why he was emaciated, the more weight he put on, the worse his pain....
sorry if i've taken over the thread x
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Another example of why 'rescuing' horses privately can go so terribly wrong.
 
Some people can,(despite being heartbroken at the situation) remain practical or more objective and view the circumstances clearly. Others,who have a different kind of personality or are perhaps not as strong,manage to convince themselves there is no problem, or that the problems are not serious enough to signify that it is necessary to Pts. This owner sounds like the latter-gentle,understanding discussion of the situation,with equally gentle raising of the options(even if Pts is,in reality,the only option-which they cannot entertain/acknowledge as it's too awful for them) is what is needed. Someone close to the owner should have this chat&recommend getting the vet's opinion too,which will hopefully be gentle but unequivocal :-/ Good luck.
 
Flicker said:
Maybe someone needs to uncover why the owner is keeping this horse alive - there may be a very powerful psychological reason why she needs it. For example I know someone who kept a very old horse going because the horse had been a gift from her late husband shortly before he died and she felt that letting the horse go broke her last link to him.
Instead of judging the owner, try chatting sympathetically to her and then maybe it will become easier for her to see that she needs to do right by her mare.
Click to expand...

This... In an ideal world we'd all be able to make the right decision at exactly the right time for the animals we have in our care... I take practical and blunt to a whole new level and have never hesitated when it's been necessary to have one of mine pts... My yearling last year, my dobie a few years ago, my cat two months ago... I have little sympathy for the selfish approach of delaying the inevitable for personal appeasement...

But... I'm looking at my Lhasa at the side of me... Old, not in good health and definitely coming to the end of her time... This pooch has outlived one of my children, sat at my side or between my feet during the dark hours no one should have to live through and is a link to the time when my family was whole... In the grand scheme of things she is a dog who is no more and no less loved than any of my other animals but she represents so much more... I hope, in her case, I will have the sense to see when the time is right as I have with my others; but I can certainly understand that for *some* people, in certain circumstances, making that call can be totally overwhelming and they might need help to get there...
 
A couple of years ago I had to put a 13yo down due to arthritis. Her right ankle was the size of melon. Then the left started to go. She came to me like this. But she was happy and quite a goof ball really. After the 1st bad winter she struggled big time. We had her in a lot, kept her bandaged, ect. Kept putting it off because she was so bright ect. Finally spring came and she somewhat normal. But before the winter of the following year, I had her put down because she was steadily getting worse. She had all the arthri stuff, all the injections, ect but her body was giving up. I never regretted that decision. She wouldn't have made it through the coming winter, the cold one.

So while some of you may think I did the wrong thing I'm happy with a day too soon than too late. Obviously I don't take a horse with no or minor problems and just put them down, but this made had episodes that weren't controlled with meds. The owner of this horse just needs to do the right thing and let her go.

Terri
 
I was once on a yard with an old mare just like this, the rspca and ilph were regular visitors but could not do anything all the time the mare was on her feet when they arrived and all the time the owner said she was trying to comply with their requests. this horse did live out initially and would get stuck down, out in the field. cue.passing motorists and walkers.calling rspca in the first instances. When she then had to come in, it became clear the woman didnt come up to see her and so we had to hay and water her. Again rspca said they could only intervene if the marr had no hay or water or if she was stuck down. On one occassion, i went to check her and it was obvious that she had been stuck ages. She had dug a gulley where her hooves had been scrapping. Needless to say, i rang the rspca, not the owner, so this time she was going to be down when they got there, however she died with her head in my lap before they arrived. Also, this poor sweet horse was in her thirties and as skinny as i have ever seen. You probably could do with trying to call them or the ilph out when she is stuck.
 
I just have to post this on this thread as it really got to me..

I was at a small yard not long ago, which was next door to another small yard that had 3 shetland ponies on it- the woman there loved them dearly but she had one older pony(20s) that suffered severe laminitis and other problems in his hooves and legs including arthiritis. This pony was kept in a dark stable for up to 13 weeks at a time and he was in so much pain he would just lay down all day- she would ask him to walk up and down to stretch his legs and he would be hobbling in too much pain to bear weight on any hooves- she bought him hoof boots and gave him painkillers etc but it just wasnt enough- the farrier came out to trim him and blood was dripping out of his feet but she kept persisting. The vets told her she had to put him down and eventually stopped coming out to her as she would refuse and told them where to stuff it- this was going on for almost another year until it got so bad he was lying down with blood pouring out of his feet in agony and she called the vet out who told her she must put him down- so she said she'd mull it over night and left him bleeding in the stable ...

Luckily he was put down the next day.
But it haunts me
 
I have a cob with arthritis who is now retired. She has had steroid injections into her joints and is now on Bute everyday. She was very lame on the frozen ground but now that it's softer she is ok. It has helped me reading other posts particularly the one from Teri as I have been made to feel bad on other threads about having her pts. We have discussed with the vet how she will be pts etc. We just need to decide when. The horse is scared of men (apart from my husband) so I have requested that the female vet will do it, my OH works away a lot and wants to be there. I definitely agree with better a day too early than a day too late, we want what is best for our horse and have shed a lot of tears. I couldn't imagine turning up one day and finding her unable to get up then having to make emergency phone calls etc. What if a male vet came? She would be very distressed. We love our horse dearly and will do what is right for her but will not let her suffer.
 
Some of the cases people are citing here are just horrible, especially the lami one. In those instances, there shouldn't be anything to think about!

However, my brother and I were talking about this recently, as he's just had his dog pts and I'd have done it 6 months earlier, as the last 6 weren't much fun for her. He said that, honestly, he was terrified of making the wrong decision, of taking her life away when there might be a chance of recovery and/or she still had things that seemed to make her happy. Once you do it, that's it, no turning back, he felt he had to be absolutely, one hundred percent, sure.

J was/is his only pet, so, unlike me, he hasn't had the experience of TLC'ing other animals through health crises or having to make that final call before. It was fear of doing wrong by her that made him keep her going and, in retrospect, although, I would have done it sooner, I'm of the 'better too soon than too late camp' and he hadn't fallen into the 'too late' camp himself. She probably went when she should have done.

The point is, sometimes inexperience, fear, and a genuine desire to do the right thing for the animal are stronger drivers than selfishness. No matter when you call time, there are always the 'what ifs' and 'should I haves' to contend with - and the guilt. You have to be so sure you can live with yourself after you've signed the death warrant. Of course, it's just as hard - if not worse - if you leave it too late and not everyone realises that until the mistake is made...
 
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