You know you are horsey when...

TakeAChance

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When you drive past a filled up skip at the side of the road and worry about your car spooking.

Haha, I love this, I do it when I'm towing my horse, just because he's with me I start seeing things that he might spook at and have even been known to give them a wide berth!
 

MiJodsR2BlinkinTite

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Ditto earlier post re. describing blokes in terms of horsey terms i.e.

"nice mover", "good hocks", "nice topline", "nice rounded outline", "nice uphill movement" etc etc!!!! :)

Also.......

When you delve into the depths of your handbag and find hoofpick (dirty); tail bandage (even dirtier & honking); plaiting bands.

When you get in the middle of the supermarket and need to blow your nose, all the aforementioned items come out of your pocket in the aisle.

When you go into M&S changing rooms clad in your yard gear (why the hell not? - of course its what you wear all the time innit?) and the janitor comes into the cubicle to clean it after you coz the next person to use it has complained of the smell.

You only take off your yard gear for the following: work (reluctantly); church, funerals, christenings, weddings (including your own); visiting aunty who's got lots of lovely money and you've gotta keep her sweet.

You are totally oblivious to the fact that because you never take off your yard gear everyone avoids you like the plague; all the time.

You don't use the terms "left" or "right" anymore; its "left rein" and "right rein".

You gauge how p!ssed you are as to whether you could walk the dressage test you're trying to remember for next Saturday.
 

Fanatical

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Hahaha, this thread is brilliant! I've been laughing out loud at so many of them...because I do them, you just don't realise do you! :)
 

doratheexplorer

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When slowing the car, you sit deep and still your body (luckily I still remember to put my foot on the brake pedal as well :cool::D).

Guilty of this, also when going over/through ditches on the ATV at home I get into my jumping position... this was fine when I am on my own, but when my ex-boyfriend was behind me on the quad he got rather a shock when I started jumping around :eek:
 

Polo*Pony

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Love these so much, especially the sitting up to stop your car, patting it and refusing to spend a lot on your own shoes but merrily forking out a fortune on numnahs and various other bits that you already have several of.


I count strides all the time - fences/lamposts etc. casting shadows onto the pavement are perfect for this but I do have to adjust sometimes (and then find myself thinking "ooh, I'll have to put a short one in/go for a long one here..." :eek::eek:)

Also, when you look outside and the rain is torrential, so you think to yourself "Ugh. Don't think I'll go to Waitrose/other shop/somewhere warm and dry after all." and then promptly go and ride in the outdoor school and not even think about how illogical this was until afterwards.

I'm sure there are others! Glad to know we're all slightly crazy together ;):p

(Do you think there's an equine equivalent to the stereotypical 'crazy cat lady'? Cos I reckon I'd be there...)
 

Emilieu

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When your shopping basket contains: two bags of apples, two bags of carrots, five pears and a five pack of strong mints. And, chucked in at the last moment, a pack of supernoodles for you.
 

Jenni_

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I wish I could quote Jackson RE the fake horsey gear as 'fashion' i had a Facebook rant about this the other day! One positive is we can all wear our Barbours / Dubarrys/ jods/ jeans out in public and not be scowled at - unless we still stink!!
 

I*HM

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I'm guilty of all of the above (and darn proud bout it too :D)

I always tell the dogs, cats, sister etc to walk on. And it really bugs me that one of my cats in cow hocked :eek:
Only ever go to tesco trailing mud, hay, shavings etc.
Every time you go by a field you check to see if it (a) has a horse in it or (b) looks like it would have a horse in it.
When you can name horse boxes, trailers etc on the motor way.

When it's possible to bring any (and I mean any) topic of conversation back to horses.

And most impressive, when your non horsie friend has a dream about how she cracked and told your whole Irish class and teacher (in Irish) how I loved my horse more than my friends, how my horse dictates my social life, how I don't have a boyfriend because I'm too horsie :)eek::p)
 

lisa-tredellans

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-when you can't smell the smell of 'horse' anymore and everyone else complains you smell ;)
-when your showing wardrobe is taking up more room than your actual wardrobe
-when your horse is fitter than you are
-when you're out driving on the road and look at every hedge and bank as a jump, or every field as a good gallop stretch
-when you gasp at spending hundreds of pounds on a car but don't think twice when it comes to showing gear, a saddle or new rugs
:cool:
 

nicelittle

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Clicking at my children to pick their feet up to put on shoes

Adopting a jumping position whilst going over speed bumps in the car (!)
 

Jackson

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When instead of having those semi conscious dreams while you're falling, you have them thinking you're falling from a horse and do the protective roll in bed...

When you are champion arm wrestler even against the men after lugging all of the poo and water about.

When you see someone else walking around in a similar horsey state as you and you eye them up to see what they're wearing and try and guess what sort of rider they are (!!!)
 

Jackson

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When your friends come down the yard shivering in the corner and gagging at the smell of fresh manure while you run round in a t-shirt, and stick your hand right in with your marigolds on to check for wormies!

When instead of laughing at the white stain smeared down the front of your jodhpurs, your equally horsey friend understands immediately that it is only wormer (!)

When even reasonably cheerful animal films make you well up..

When you cringe at inexperienced actors come riders jabbing horses in the mouth in films.

When you know Katie Price as the one who makes disgusting riding outfits, and not the one who has a tv show (or whatever she does!)
 

Shadow-01

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When your phone in your pocket accidently calls *non horsey* friend. She later checks her voice mail and calls to say she's received a message from you, and all she can hear is "clip clopping from a horse"!

When OH complains that he's found bits of hay in the bed?!

When you have the same annual conversation after the shortest day about how much extra light there is each evening :D
 

Christmas Magic

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Oh,I've got loads:D
You say"over"to your friends and family when you want to move them,instead of asking politely.
You kiss to your kids to make them go faster or say"Come on,trot on!"
Walking behind car you always put your hand on the bumper (just in case ,it know you there and wont buck)
When cycling trying to keep heels down:)
You holding bag like reins,instead of with full hand.
You have separate shelve in your wardrobe for saddleclothes and bandages.
You patting your friends/family on the back and say "good boy/girl!:)
Trying to stop your car you pulling the wheel and sitting deeper:)
Always looking for any horse/tack mistakes in historical or any other films.
Looking at the golf course you just sad,cos it such a waste of space,could have a nice canter out there:)

Think its enough for now.cant think about anything else at the moment:)
 

Bettyboo222

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Whislt in the car you look at things and decide whether you would jump them
You 'click' at people you are with to encourage them to hurry up
You can cycle with your heel down
Your horses bed is tidyer than your own
 

MeganLindsx

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When the main thing you worry about at christmas is who is going to put the horse to bed if your away...

When you check what the weather is going to be like EVERY night...
 

JustKickOn

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(Do you think there's an equine equivalent to the stereotypical 'crazy cat lady'? Cos I reckon I'd be there...)

HD-7548M-CRAZY-LADY_250.jpg


No??
 

Bettyboo222

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Remembered some more

When most of your friends have basic horsey knowladge and can tell you most parts of the horsey body and basic care. Regardless of the fact that non of them have ever ridden or been near a horse but just putup with me wittering on about it.

You count strides to shadows and puddles
 

Kadastorm

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-when you try and hunt for something decent to wear on a night out and realise all your clothes are your yard clothes.
-when you cluck at family members/pets/random people/the t.v
-when you count the stides and 'jump' speed bumps in the road
- when you empty your bag and the bottom is filled with hay, feed, polos and your folding hoof pick you have been hunting for for ages.
-when non horsey people dont want to talk to you because all you talk about is horses
-when you dont get out of bed early for anything other than to get to the yard/a show etc
-when you dont mind walking around town/a supermarket in your yard clothes but get self concious when in 'normal' clothes.
-when you spend more on your horse at christmas than anyone else
- when you would rather have a horse than a boyfriend
-holding bags like reins
-when you try and lunge your dog
 

laurajane

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I think mine is when you get to the pub, on a date! And get off someone you haven't seen in a while
"oh my god I didn't know what you looked like clean!"
Yeah cheers mate! Lol :D
 

EmmaB

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LOL so many of these are true!! Love the bit of shrivelled carrot in your pocket/holding bags and dog lead as if they're reins/going in the supermarket covered in crap :eek:/finding hay in the bed/counting strides/thinking about how anything can be made into jumps :p

Few of mine:
When at school you told the teacher you had tacked up the sewing machine :eek: I meant to say threaded!! :D

When your boss takes you into the office to say you obviously arn't working hard enough because there are little bits of paper with horse drawings on all over the place...:rolleyes:

When your non horsey friend tells you off for calling your horse a pony, he's learnt the difference.

When your other non horsey friend can't understand why your laughing when he asks the difference between a stallion and a unicorn! He thought they were real!

When everyone says that your fluffy russian hat goes on your head in september and doesn't come off til february :D

Trying to lunge and jump the dogs, setting up related distances for them only to have them jump the whole thing in one go! :eek: and of course watching for which leg they're on and flying changes haha! Hilarious thread :)
 

emma.is

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When you get in trouble from your teacher because there was straw in your exercise books!
(Suppose that's what I get for rushing up to the farm from school so I can fit in a ride!)

When your boif comes to the yard because he never sees you!

When revision notes are posted around the tack room not your bedroom!!

When a wheelbarrow is top of your xmas list

When he's the only thing that will get you out of bed at 9am on a snowy freezing cold morning...
 

MeganLindsx

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When the bottom of your pockets are filled with crumbs of pony nuts...

When all your clothes become stable clothes!

When all your spare money goes on a new rug or brushing boots...

When your perfect christmas present would be a voucher for a lot of horse feed!!

When you are constantly being asked if a pony is a baby horse
 

Shantara

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I also do jumping position when in the car!
And it gives me great comfort to hold bags and other things like reins. When I'm on the till at work, I often hold the plastic bags and try to get a contact haha.

I also count the strides to puddles and twigs etc..
I like to imagine myself galloping through the fields, jumping the hedges when I'm on long train/bus/car rides!

When I got a bit bored whilst being intimate, I often thought to myself "I'd rather be riding a horse..." (Not in the same way, of course!!)

When you try and make friends with horses in fields!
 
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