I’ve just arranged pts

Peregrine Falcon said:
If I was anywhere near you I would. It is the right thing to be doing. You are freeing him from pain.
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Thank you. I know it and I’m expecting to be relieved when it’s over. Seeing his face and him being naughty again it making it tough.
I could cut the drugs and see it’s real needed but it’s nice seeing his naughty personality come out really
 
poiuytrewq said:
Thank you. I know it and I’m expecting to be relieved when it’s over.
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I felt relieved after mine were PTS. Relieved they were no longer in pain and relieved the big black cloud of worry for their pain had gone.
You are making his days happy and pain free.
Repeating the oldest horse adage
This is the greatest gift you can give.
 
Meredith said:
I am too far away as well. Is there no one who could be with you?
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It’s fine. I’m actually good with practicalities. It’s just the knowing it’s right that’s the hard bit, I do know really.
If he wasn’t on the drugs it would be obvious and he can’t stay on the amount he’s needing :(
 
You are doing the right thing.

Your partner needs to see someone dying of a painfull disease. My uncle wanted to die at home but in the final week the pain was so bad that he did nothing but scream and cry. The drugs that could be given at home were not enough so he went into a hospice and drugged into oblivion. It was still possible to tell that he was suffering. Anyone seeing that would understand just how kind you are being.
 
I gave mine bute for her last weekend and the way she walked out to the field made me realise how uncomfortable she had been before so I knew it was right to let her go . You know that it’s only the drugs that are making him feel better so you are doing the right thing,, hope all goes well tomorrow and look after yourself
 
I cried my heart out for 2 days before my mare was PTS. Every time I looked at her I felt sick to my stomach.

I cried again as she left us but never shed a tear after that. I think I finally felt at peace knowing that she would never suffer.

It might not be right for everyone but the day before she was PTS I gathered up all her belongings and put them away. I even emptied her stable. I think I knew that constantly seeing her things in the following days would be much too painful.

It is much harder when they look fabulous but remember that you are preventing future suffering and that's the kindest thing we can do for our old friends.

You are absolutely doing the right thing. Xx
 
poiuytrewq said:
I’m feeling so horrific. I keep questioning myself and all week I’ve been thinking this is the last Tuesday, Wednesday etc
Tonight I fed him and realised tomorrow night is the last time I give him dinner at night, the last time I need to soak hay.
He looks so good, he’s happy. He towed me in tonight, he’s stopped coughing and Is sound.

He’s on 3 bute and 100 steroids to give him a fab last week. I know that but it’s killing me killing him :(
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You are not killing him. You have arranged to put an end to his pain. He certainly can’t carry on for long on that level of medication. If you tried that he would soon have other problems, caused by the meds.
Don't let your OH's appalling attitude make you feel guilty for doing a kindness. I suggest that you follow FL's advice about a discussion of what he would like the horse's end of life to be like and how he could realistically facilitate that.
 
Its right, he needs you to have his corner and take control to prevent him suffering, its really rough and there are lots of us thinking of you and supporting your decision, your all finding it tough and dealing with it differently, its great when we all deal with thibgs in a supportive manner but it doesn't always work like that. Have a hug.
 
Isn’t it just what we want for them? That when their time comes, they pass without suffering and knowing how loved they are. If it makes you feel any better, I couldn’t do it. Every time I’ve phoned the vet and had it done the same day. Most of mine haven’t had a lovely few days, they’ve just gone, because I couldn’t stand the waiting. What you are doing is right for him, but of course it’s awful for you. If you cancelled now you are very likely to end up with liver or gut issues, or colic and the same decision will have to be made anyway, with your horse in pain.

You are absolutely doing the best thing for your horse, I’ve no doubt. I’m sorry for your OH that he can’t be more supportive.
 
I usually bring them in early on the weekend as it’s dark when I get home from work over winter until about now. Tonight i left them for the first time and when I got back my horse was going nuts, doing somersaults and tearing round and Jake was joining in. He never joins in the fun anymore, just stands and watches but he was cantering, I’ve not seen him canter in so long!
It was really lovely, as long as you didn’t focus on the legs! He looked happy, the legs looked terrible but he looked so sweet.
 
meleeka said:
Isn’t it just what we want for them? That when their time comes, they pass without suffering and knowing how loved they are. If it makes you feel any better, I couldn’t do it. Every time I’ve phoned the vet and had it done the same day. Most of mine haven’t had a lovely few days, they’ve just gone, because I couldn’t stand the waiting. What you are doing is right for him, but of course it’s awful for you. If you cancelled now you are very likely to end up with liver or gut issues, or colic and the same decision will have to be made anyway, with your horse in pain.

You are absolutely doing the best thing for your horse, I’ve no doubt. I’m sorry for your OH that he can’t be more supportive.
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I’m definitely not cancelling.
Thank you for your nice replies. I appreciate them, along with all the other lovely replies
 
rabatsa said:
You are doing the right thing.

Your partner needs to see someone dying of a painfull disease. My uncle wanted to die at home but in the final week the pain was so bad that he did nothing but scream and cry. The drugs that could be given at home were not enough so he went into a hospice and drugged into oblivion. It was still possible to tell that he was suffering. Anyone seeing that would understand just how kind you are being.
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I’m really really sorry to hear that. We are lucky we can do this for animals.
 
It is the hardest decision to make, but from what you've said of your horse it sounds like the right one, at the right time. He is on a lot of medication at the moment which will mask some of his suffering but that level of bute and steroids is unlikely to be sustainable for any length of time without causing their own health issues. If you weren't making the right decision then the vet wouldn't be supporting you on it, so I hope that you can take some reassurance from that. I will be thinking of you tomorrow x
 
Thinking of you tomorrow, it sounds like it’s the right time but that doesn’t make it any easier. This is the worst time though, you will be sad but it’s the last act of kindness we can show for our beloved horses. If he could talk he would be thanking you for not letting him get to the stage where he is in pain and suffering. Big hugs x
 
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