I've booked my horse in with the vets to be PTS

[lottiepony]

Just wanted to say how sorry I am for you. A tough decision but I believe it's one of our duties as owners to make it if required. It never times right but to have 17 years of memories is just wonderful.

Take each day as it comes and good luck for Friday.

 

[Rumtytum]

So very sorry for you Birker. The right thing to do doesn’t make it any easier.

 

[Gift Horse]

I’m sorry, It’s cruel that an act of selfless kindness hurts so much x

 

[mini_b]

You know you’re doing the right thing for her - that doesn’t make it any easier I know.
Ignore the woman, some folk don’t “get” animal folk.
Look after yourself Xx

 

[brighteyes]

You have done all you can and run out of options which are reasonable or fair. You can't buy time for ever and she is a lucky horse to have you putting her fist and foremost this last time. Talk to your vet now and again on the day about your concerns regarding her heart. This is the saddest time for you and I have been there more than a few times. So sorry and my thoughts will be with you.

 

[Emilieu]

I too had to wait a few days to have my boy PTS due to various circumstances, it was awful and I felt in a total fog the whole time. You have all my sympathy. I really hope Friday goes well for you and I will think of you both on Tuesday.

 

[Mrs. Jingle]

I am so sorry - horrible when we have to make this final decision for their welfare. One of my old timers was actually on 6 bute a day (but he was a very big horse) for the last few days and he wasn't even sound on that, but despite that the decision was still a hard one to make.

You are doing the very best you can for your old horse, stay strong for your horse for now, and then let it all go once the deed is done knowing it was the only decent thing to do.

 

[Red-1]

I feel for you, but glad you can offer that final act of kindness. Look after yourself too. X

 

[Midlifecrisis]

Oh that has brought tears to my eyes for you both...what a brave decision and a long time to wait. Nothing I can type can make you feel better but I’m sending you a hug and a hand hold.

 

[scats]

Really sad to hear this, but you have made a very selfless decision. The waiting is the worst bit, please take care of yourself xx

 

[millikins]

My thoughts are with you, it's awful, like most on here I've been there too. My laminitic pony was on paracetamol as well as bute when we struggled to manage her pain. You could ask your vet about dosage if reluctant to give more bute, mine was only 200kg so it might be impractical for a much larger horse. Best wishes for Friday.

 

[SEL]

I've had a 700kg horse on 4 bute and tbh in your situation I'd throw it down for the next few days. I'm so sorry its come to this. I wish they'd live longer lives but it's such a privilege to have them with us even if it's never long enough **hugs**

 

[BallyRoanBaubles]

So sorry, knowing you’re doing the right thing doesn’t make it any easier, will be thinking about you Tuesday x

 

[joelb]

Has anyone had a horse pts by injection that has had quite a pronounced heart murmur and or 2nd degree heart block? Does is make any difference?
This is worrying me a bit, it would be awful for it not to go to plan.

The one I lost to colic had a grade 5 murmur, she went very peacefully by injection with no issues.

So sorry you've reached the end of the road, as others have said the waiting can be torture and consume every waking moment. Just remember to look after yourself. I find PTS gets more difficult the older I get, I'm still reeling from losing "only a cat" 6 weeks ago....he was my world and I swear I'll end up punching the next person who suggests I should be over it. Safe passage to your girl on Tuesday x

 

[Lurfy]

The waiting really is the worst part. I was with my friend this morning when he had his horse pts. The horse went quickly and peacefully and my friend within a couple of minutes said he felt a weight lift off him. It is so hard getting through the leadup period. From the sound of it you have no choice either, so good on you for giving your much loved horse a dignified end.

 

[Apizz2019]

I'm so sorry ?

We had a 4 day countdown to the awful day, it was the worst of the worst. I planned ahead so my 8 year old daughter could spend a few precious last days with her pony of a lifetime. It ruined me, I cried river's, couldn't eat or sleep and it was just the most horrid 4 days I've lived through.

However, I'm glad we had the option of doing this, rather than an emergency, as my daughter and I were able to cherish his last days, feed him what he wanted and have time to come to terms with the inevitable. We were even lucky enough to get a last minute photo shoot.

On the day, my daughter was so brave, incredibly brave. She brushed him for hours beforehand and told me he'd be 'the sparkliest pony to go over the rainbow bridge today' and kissed and cuddled him a million times over. She led him down to his final spot, kissed him one last time and told him how much she loved him, then walked away. Only then did she break down.

It broke me, I'm tearing up writing this, it's still so raw.

My thoughts are with you. Sending strength, love and hugs and I'm only a message away if you need support or someone to speak to.

Please don't forget to be kind to yourself too.

Love xxx

 

[Birker2020]

Thank you so much, each and everyone of you.

I gave her two bute last night to see if she would be more comfortable overnight in the paddock and was pleased when she came to me this morning that she was a lot more comfortable. We had a bit of a hand graze before work followed by breakfast in the indoor school (where she will find her angel wings) and she enjoyed a roll in there too which was nice to see.

I thought it would be really hard to wait this time but so far I am actually enjoying spending the extra time with her, work seems to be a source of constant annoyance to me as I don't really want to be there and have too much time to think. But my heart rate goes down as soon as I see her again.

Last night our lovely rug lady came to drop off some rugs. She'd carried out alterations to the beautiful Thermatex rug I was given by a friend - it had been slipping over her withers. She knew I was having her pts soon and didn't like to ask if she could try it on to see if her alterations had been accurate so I offered. It fitted her like a glove. A bitter sweet moment really.

The vets practice have just rung asking if I mind someone tagging onto my visit to get their horse vaccinated! I've said they can go first. Some people are unbelievable.....

 

[Birker2020]

I'm so sorry ?

We had a 4 day countdown to the awful day, it was the worst of the worst. I planned ahead so my 8 year old daughter could spend a few precious last days with her pony of a lifetime. It ruined me, I cried river's, couldn't eat or sleep and it was just the most horrid 4 days I've lived through.

However, I'm glad we had the option of doing this, rather than an emergency, as my daughter and I were able to cherish his last days, feed him what he wanted and have time to come to terms with the inevitable. We were even lucky enough to get a last minute photo shoot.

On the day, my daughter was so brave, incredibly brave. She brushed him for hours beforehand and told me he'd be 'the sparkliest pony to go over the rainbow bridge today' and kissed and cuddled him a million times over. She led him down to his final spot, kissed him one last time and told him how much she loved him, then walked away. Only then did she break down.

It broke me, I'm tearing up writing this, it's still so raw.

My thoughts are with you. Sending strength, love and hugs and I'm only a message away if you need support or someone to speak to.

Please don't forget to be kind to yourself too.

Love xxx

I'm so sorry, that's so sad. And your daughter
Thank you for your kind offer of having someone to message, that's very kind of you x

 

[MiJodsR2BlinkinTite]

Couldn't bypass this without saying how sorry I am. Have been in your position and it just isn't easy.

I am (very gently) asking: do you have someone who could be with you on the day itself?? I have heard there is a support network called "Friends at the End". Haven't used them myself - perhaps someone on here might know more - but I do think you need someone there mebbe just to support you.

On the day, yes you will be sad, that is very natural. It is a horrible feeling when the vet's car pulls into your yard and you know that when he/she pulls out again then your horse will be gone.......... and this is why I would strongly advise you to have some kind of support mechanism for yourself set up.

Just a word of advice; you may or may not choose to stay with your horse until the very end - but (and again I say this gently) it is far better if the owner isn't there when the horse is loaded up to be taken away.......... most vets & professionals steer the client away at this time and advise them that it is better not to watch this, as (yes although the horse doesn't know anything about it) it can be quite upsetting. Oh and just check what IS happening as regards to removal of your horse as although most vets do arrange this for the client, it is something that if it hasn't been arranged beforehand, isn't going to be pleasant to have to fix on the day.......

Also make sure you ask for shoes/mane/tail for mementoes etc.

So very sorry for you. A peaceful passing is the ultimate "thank you" we can give to our horses and when I had my two oldies PTS together, on the same day, it felt that although there was sadness, it was indeed a fitting tribute to them and everything they had given.

 

[windand rain]

Really hard to say much as it is awful having to wait but it is the kindest thing we can do for our horse and I hope you can concentrate enough to get your new job. Be kind to yourself too you will grieve but the best way is if you do so by talking/writing about her when you can. There are many that understand and are able to listen

 

[Apizz2019]

I'm so sorry, that's so sad. And your daughter
Thank you for your kind offer of having someone to message, that's very kind of you x

I'm not ashamed to say I sought professional help as it really did break me.

I didn't have anyone to reach out to, sadly, so I wouldn't hesitate to be that ear to listen and comfort in times of need.

Our beloved horses make us and break us, in equal measure. ? x

 

[Birker2020]

Couldn't bypass this without saying how sorry I am. Have been in your position and it just isn't easy.

I am (very gently) asking: do you have someone who could be with you on the day itself?? I have heard there is a support network called "Friends at the End". Haven't used them myself - perhaps someone on here might know more - but I do think you need someone there mebbe just to support you.

On the day, yes you will be sad, that is very natural. It is a horrible feeling when the vet's car pulls into your yard and you know that when he/she pulls out again then your horse will be gone.......... and this is why I would strongly advise you to have some kind of support mechanism for yourself set up.

Just a word of advice; you may or may not choose to stay with your horse until the very end - but (and again I say this gently) it is far better if the owner isn't there when the horse is loaded up to be taken away.......... most vets & professionals steer the client away at this time and advise them that it is better not to watch this, as (yes although the horse doesn't know anything about it) it can be quite upsetting. Oh and just check what IS happening as regards to removal of your horse as although most vets do arrange this for the client, it is something that if it hasn't been arranged beforehand, isn't going to be pleasant to have to fix on the day.......

Also make sure you ask for shoes/mane/tail for mementoes etc.

So very sorry for you. A peaceful passing is the ultimate "thank you" we can give to our horses and when I had my two oldies PTS together, on the same day, it felt that although there was sadness, it was indeed a fitting tribute to them and everything they had given.

Thank you for your comments.

Friends at the End was something a couple of liveries told me about last night. I have heard of them before, but thank you.
My partner will be with me, a good friend has offered but I'd rather it was just me, my partner and the vet.

I already know about not watching removal so we intend to go more or less straight away afterwards. The removal is arranged for 30 minutes later the vet arranged this.

The vet said not to worry about the final bill as I can pay it as and when, I have a balance at the moment of less than a fiver after paying a wad off on Monday when the money had cleared from my account.

I shall cut a bit of tail off before, thank you for that, I'd like to make a bracelet of something out of it in the future.

I am just annoyed that someone on the yard chose to see if they could 'share' the visit with me for something that is routine. I think its very disrespectful but maybe I am getting wound up about nothing.

 

[Birker2020]

I'm not ashamed to say I sought professional help as it really did break me.

I didn't have anyone to reach out to, sadly, so I wouldn't hesitate to be that ear to listen and comfort in times of need.

Our beloved horses make us and break us, in equal measure. ? x

I had help for the last one, he was one of a series of four that I lost, one after the other after the other within a short period of time and finally found I couldn't cope and was struggling mentally.
Luckily with B I have had a break from the turmoil for a long time so I feel very grateful for the wonderful years we've had.

I hate that I know I will be constantly rewinding the last few seconds of her life in my head for the next 12 months and will wake and the sudden realisation that she is not here will hit me.
But that is part and parcel of grieving.

 

[Apizz2019]

I had help for the last one, he was one of a series of four that I lost, one after the other after the other within a short period of time and finally found I couldn't cope and was struggling mentally.
Luckily with B I have had a break from the turmoil for a long time so I feel very grateful for the wonderful years we've had.

I hate that I know I will be constantly rewinding the last few seconds of her life in my head for the next 12 months and will wake and the sudden realisation that she is not here will hit me.
But that is part and parcel of grieving.

Oh no, I'm so sorry to hear this. What a horrid time you've had.

I remember our sad day like it was yesterday. The grief I felt actually physically hurt, it was awful.

You're very brave and a wonderful owner for doing the right thing, though often the right decision is the most painful one. X

 

[Quigleyandme]

So sorry.

 

[splashgirl45]

HUGS for everyone who has been through this, these posts have made my eyes leak. all i can say is i found great relief after my last horse but also felt like i was in shock, even though i had know it was inevitable i couldnt quite believe it had happened. its what we owe our horses but its bloomin hard for us....birker2020, agree most insensitive of the other livery but some people dont think . hope you are coping ok xx

 

[Caol Ila]

I think you and I should get extremely, virtually drunk together.

 

[Birker2020]

I think you and I should get extremely, virtually drunk together.

Ha sounds like great fun haven't been wasted for years and its about time I think.
We can raise a glass to our lovely horses.

 

[Birker2020]

This morning when I went to get her in.

 

[ycbm]

Good luck with the job interview today, B, I hope that you'll be able to stifle the upset about the coming sad event for long enough to land the contract. I'll be rooting for you.
.