The Forum FAQs.

JenJ

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Q: How do I get maximum attention on the forum?
A: Post frequently. Always make sure to bump your own posts, repeatedly. Have your horse, or a friend's horse or a livery's horse get an interesting condition and ask lots of questions. Then parrot back any information gained to ensure you are now seen as the expert on that condition. Not many people will notice that when you make a statement and one of the people who does know what they're talking about contradicts you you immediately change your stance - or blame a typo. Get involved in an argument or two, declaring it as fun. If all else fails get an interesting condition yourself, or arrange for a family member or friend to get one to explain any possible unpleasantness in your previous posts and ensure you get all the soothing vibes and attention you could possibly need.

Oh YES!
 

Emilieu

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Did anyone mention 'I weight seven stone, am I too heavy for my 17 hh warmblood' accompanied by pics of tiny rider in the vest top and a perfectly happy looking monster of a horse?
 

Littlelegs

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Patterdale I love you, despite having just snorted coffee everywhere!
Q- my massively fat native has become foot sore on the roads & is standing a bit funny too this spring. He's fine on the knee deep dairy pasture he lives on though. Does this mean he needs shoes on?
A- yes definitely. It can't possibly be a sign of laminitis provided you've been feeding large quantities of happy hoof.
Q- my horse has never been schooled & I want to get it 'on the bit' but despite swopping to a waterford it keeps pulling my arms out. What bit next? And how do you school?
A- try a neue-schule verbidend sweet iron elevator roller with peanut & hanging cheeks & lunge in an equi ami for 3hrs per day. And take up weight lifting for upper body strength. If anyone suggests lessons or paying a pro to ride then they are bullies who don't remember everyone was a novice once.
Q- opinions please.
A- yes you are right. Anyone who offers a different opinion is a judgemental bully.
 

Dizzy socks

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Another "like" :D.

What about...
Q: my horse bolts everytime I get on him, he is in an eggbut snaffle. Should I change to a pelhem/waterford/Dutch gag? Sometimes I cannot stop for hours.
A: you horse is not bolting, he is tanking. If he bolted he would run straight into something, probably killing you both. I advise PTS, or walk around the school till you can walk everywhere, DO NOT OVERBIT.

not too far off the truth :)
 

JenJ

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Another "like" :D.

What about...
Q: my horse bolts everytime I get on him, he is in an eggbut snaffle. Should I change to a pelhem/waterford/Dutch gag? Sometimes I cannot stop for hours.
A: you horse is not bolting, he is tanking. If he bolted he would run straight into something, probably killing you both. I advise PTS, or walk around the school till you can walk everywhere, DO NOT OVERBIT.

not too far off the truth :)

Too true! :D
 

Em123

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Not a question but:

Ask a stupid question that is pretty much a welfare case , get stick for it so invent fake accounts that agree with OP and make them out to be gods gift :D ;)



What about if you disagree with the mob of angry 'ladies' and then get accused of being a troll/ fake?!
 

Roasted Chestnuts

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Wow just when people were moaning about the immature responses to threads.

The length of time that this forum has been running and the sheer volume of posts daily means that yes most questions will have been asked at some point but if everyone just went through archives looking for advice then some of it could be outdated and the forum would lack new threads.
 
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