Angry, disgusted, devestated...trust no one!!!

Lots of understanding sympathetic people as ever on here!
If youve left your horse in the care of someone you consider a friend why would you feel the need to check it? We dont know OP's circumstances, how do we know she could get back to check on the mare, love the way you all make assumptions without knowing a the whole story. For that matter a horse can drop weight in very short space of time given the right set of circumstance, having had mine out on loan for a month & had him returned in a shocking state i find it totally plausible! Seems to me OP's friend should have informed her if there was concern over the mares weight & asked that she was either taken away or moved to stabling. If you put your horse in the care of someone else then surely they should be informing you of any concerns not just ignoring it till the horse is on deaths door.....& going "ooops my bad, i forgot to tell you".
Dont beat yourself up OP, s**t happens, the main thing is youve got her somewhere where she can hopefully regain strength & make the long journey down to you.
 
Lack of due care and attention from both sides. Livery yard owner should have been honest about the horse and arrange with the owner suitable care. Owner should have found means to check on horse, or had another friend just check up on the horses.

Hope all the horses are ok.
 
silvershoes said:
Its only my fault why she was there, she has been there since October last year, and until December when I moved she was checked by myself and was fine. Happy as larry with the others, once we moved it was agreed that until we could come back for them the YO was going to take care of them and charge us accordingly. Which is what she did, hay was put in the field when the bad weather came, which was added to our bill. We kept in touch and frequently asked how they were doing and I have umpteen messages saying they were both doing well. So this has only happened since being completely under the YO care. I know I only have myself to blame for the length of time she has been there, I appologise for snapping but I'm in a pretty ****** situation at the moment. I just feel gutted for my horse that I have allowed it to happen :( but then I do think the YO is the only one to blame for the condition she is in.
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They are to blame, you were paying them to look after your horse and they were telling you the horse is ok. THEY were legally responsible for their care and if there was an issue with the horse they were responsible for either dealing with it or contacting you to raise it so that you could.

It's a different scenario from one where a horse is just left, its keep not paid for or something like that.

I do think you should pursue it tho, were any vets consulted? If not and you weren't told either then I would be contacting Bhs or one of the welfare charities even the dreaded RSPCA, if ony to get this person onto the known to us radar in case something similar should happen again.
 
OP there are some people who obviously can't understand that 500 miles is a long way. If it helps I have seen a horse go from covered but not fat to skeletal in a few days, but he was very ill & it was obvious. If that was the case with yours YO should have been straight on the phone. Hope it goes well. It's hard when someone you think you can trust treats your horse badly.
 
If the OP and the yard owner had an agreement that the YO was to be providing full care for the horse when the OP was away and informed the OP that the horse was fine, then the YO is responsible for the horse's condition. Even if the horse has some medical issue which caused her to lose weight like that, surely the YO should have noticed and told the owner that the horse wasn't fine and called the vet.

I have left my horse in the care of a friend for three months and not checked on her myself during that time (I was in Ireland; horse was in the States, so checking on her wasn't exactly pragmatic). I relied on updates from my friend, who always told me she was fine, which she was. It didn't occur to me to ask another friend to double check on the horse or anything like that. I just assumed that if my friend, who I trusted enough to be responsible for my horse for three months, told me that the horse was happy and healthy, then she was. I'm just saying, it's not out of line or unreasonable to leave your horse in someone else's care for a few months and then trust that they will give you honest updates about how he or she is doing.
 
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ester said:
was hay to be provided as part of the contract/charged separately?

does your other horse look ok (as you mention both mares)?

Is it possible that the TB has something underlying going on that has caused the weightloss over and above the other one? or is she a poor doer anyway (in which case perhaps grass livery wasn't suitable for her)
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My thoughts exactly.
 
lachlanandmarcus said:
They are to blame, you were paying them to look after your horse and they were telling you the horse is ok. THEY were legally responsible for their care and if there was an issue with the horse they were responsible for either dealing with it or contacting you to raise it so that you could.

It's a different scenario from one where a horse is just left, its keep not paid for or something like that.

I do think you should pursue it tho, were any vets consulted? If not and you weren't told either then I would be contacting Bhs or one of the welfare charities even the dreaded RSPCA, if ony to get this person onto the known to us radar in case something similar should happen again.
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Yeah the vet was called on Saturday who confirmed she was too weak to travel. She was given fluids, antibiotics for her mud fever, bute, liquid paraphyn and electrolytes as she is prone to impaction colic. So its touch and go for her now as she is so weak she can't walk very well, yet she needs to walk to stop the impaction. She had coliced yesterday so had to be flushed out. Shes having such a hard time right now and its killing me not being there :(

For everyone saying I must have had time to go back in 8 weeks, its difficult when you run your own livery yard....don't want to leave other peoples horses behind. Which is why I am so annoyed as I could never and would never let a horse on my livery yard get in such a state. Not even my worst enemy. I am reluctant to post photos as they are too distressing :(
 
OP I have no idea of your personal circumstances so am not going to join those saying it is your fault. If you trusted the YO's word as a friend, then I can understand why you are so upset. I have friends I would trust to look after my horse in difficult circumstances, including if I was no longer around, but who can say whether the same could happen to me.
One thing that isn't clear is whether your OH's mare, who was also left there, is OK? If she is, I would be very concerned that there is something serious underlying your mare's condition and would have the vet running all the checks now.
 
To be honest I think blame can be placed on both sides of the party, the yard owner has a duty of care to the horses but so do you as an owner, if I couldn't make the trip I probably would have wanted photo updates to check all is well.

However if I was in your situation I would have used the money you would be spending on livery to have the horses transported down straight away or at least sooner, although what's done is done and i hope your little mare is feeling much better soon x
 
moleskinsmum said:
OP I have no idea of your personal circumstances so am not going to join those saying it is your fault. If you trusted the YO's word as a friend, then I can understand why you are so upset. I have friends I would trust to look after my horse in difficult circumstances, including if I was no longer around, but who can say whether the same could happen to me.
One thing that isn't clear is whether your OH's mare, who was also left there, is OK? If she is, I would be very concerned that there is something serious underlying your mare's condition and would have the vet running all the checks now.
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My OHs mare is ok, she doesnt look great as we found out she lost her rug a while ago and another wasn't put on. But thats another story. The vet said she has obviously not coped and must have been too weak to walk to the hay, but if this was the case why was it un noticed? :( she doesnt have any underlying problems to cause her to loose weight so dramatically, I've owned her for 9yrs and although a TB she was never difficult to keep weight on. I just think she has got to a point where she had given up but went completely un noticed, poor girl :(
 
Gosh, aren't there some self righteous posters on this thread!

OP, in your position, I too would be extremely angry and feel let down by the YO (particularly as she was also a friend!).

You have left your horses in her care, she knew she was responsible for them and hadn't alerted you that the mare was dropping weight to the point she could barely stand.

I have had horses on grass livery and I have had liveries at my place before and I would place the responsibility for this mare's condition squarely with the YO, not the OP.

My broodmare is away at the moment on livery- she is only about 100 miles away but we only go to see her every 8 weeks or so.
She is beautifully cared for and I have no complaints but I would expect if there was any issue with her care or condition I would be told asap, not for them to wait for my next visit to come around (and I do have absolute faith the carer of my horse would do that for me :))
 
I wonder if some of the posters actually read the OP's first words before responding? 2 horses could not be brought up. Arrangements had been made for care to be given which included checking and hay. Mare had been well and healthy before leaving. I would have trusted someone if that had been the case and I was paying for the service.

Those who question how the horse can lose so much weight - the horse is a TB and they can drop weight incredibly quickly. My TB dropped so much weight after his colic operation, I walked straight past him when I came up to see him 2 days after the op. I had stayed, watched the op and left a horse that looked like a fit hunter. 2 days later I didn't recognise him.

I would suspect the mare became cold and that hay was not enough to keep her going and she actually needed hard feed as well. We have a few TB and TB x's who live out and without exception, they did all need hard feed during the snow as well as the extra forage and extra rugs. They have all come out looking well, even the highly strung 4 year old TB mare.
 
Firewall's post says it all really.

If YO had agreed to care for them, then it should have been done; even if only taking the rugs off every few days or so to see what was happening underneath.

Could be some medical issue to cause weight loss.
 
Look at it in a different light and then consider the answer.

If the OP had been too ill to care for the mare and had placed the horse in the hands of a friend who was both paid and trusted to care for the horse would so many of you being blaming the OP for the situation ?

Of course not, we would all be wishing the OP a speedy recovery and hoping she can enjoy her horse again.

Regardless of the reason, be it a long distance move, illness, work commitments etc, the OP paid and trusted a friend to care for the horse.

I hope the horse recovers OP, and if I had been in your situation and my horse had ended up like that I would have knocked the friends teeth down her throat !
 
My heart bleeds for this little mare. I hope that she manages to make a full recovery. If she does, then it is likely that she will have a legacy of gastric ulcers. This happened to one of my livery clients at her last livery. She had a knee operation which took 6 weeks to recover from. She left her horse on full livery. After 6 weeks when she removed her horse's rugs, she was like a walking skeleton! She is at my yard now but has recurrent ulcers that will never completely go. :(

If you left your horses with the YO agreeing to 'check on them', this is not the same as 'feeding them'. Was there an agreement in place regarding feeding? :confused: She would have needed the best part of a bale of hay a day. There is no reason for grass kept horses to drop condition if they are being adequately fed.
 
Wagtail said:
My heart bleeds for this little mare. I hope that she manages to make a full recovery. If she does, then it is likely that she will have a legacy of gastric ulcers. This happened to one of my livery clients at her last livery. She had a knee operation which took 6 weeks to recover from. She left her horse on full livery. After 6 weeks when she removed her horse's rugs, she was like a walking skeleton! She is at my yard now but has recurrent ulcers that will never completely go. :(

If you left your horses with the YO agreeing to 'check on them', this is not the same as 'feeding them'. Was there an agreement in place regarding feeding? :confused: She would have needed the best part of a bale of hay a day. There is no reason for grass kept horses to drop condition if they are being adequately fed.
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She was in a 20 acre field with grass at least ankle high! But when the snow came yes bales of hay were put in the field and we were charged accordingly. If she needed hard feed I would have also paid for this, but I wasn't told that she clearly wasn't coping :( we have horses living out at our yard and we also have 2 colts living out and they are fat as puddings! I believe any horse can live out if they are cared for correctly. I just wish the YO said something and I could have done something to help her
 
silvershoes said:
She was in a 20 acre field with grass at least ankle high! But when the snow came yes bales of hay were put in the field and we were charged accordingly. If she needed hard feed I would have also paid for this, but I wasn't told that she clearly wasn't coping :( we have horses living out at our yard and we also have 2 colts living out and they are fat as puddings! I believe any horse can live out if they are cared for correctly. I just wish the YO said something and I could have done something to help her
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Sorry, I posted before reading all the thread. Unbelievable that the YO did not notice a problem. They should have been removing rugs every few days to check all was well. I will keep my fingers crossed for your poor girlie. I hope she pulls through, bless her.
 
AdorableAlice said:
Look at it in a different light and then consider the answer.

If the OP had been too ill to care for the mare and had placed the horse in the hands of a friend who was both paid and trusted to care for the horse would so many of you being blaming the OP for the situation ?

Of course not, we would all be wishing the OP a speedy recovery and hoping she can enjoy her horse again.

Regardless of the reason, be it a long distance move, illness, work commitments etc, the OP paid and trusted a friend to care for the horse.

I hope the horse recovers OP, and if I had been in your situation and my horse had ended up like that I would have knocked the friends teeth down her throat !
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^^^ this^^^

The OP obviously felt she had made adequate arrangements for her horse to be cared for until she could collect her. when you are a considerable distance away and have other responsibilities you will rightly (or wrongly) assume that your horse is being cared for as arranged and not feel you have to drive over there weekly to check!
Awful thing to happen OP and i hope your mare makes a good recovery.x
 
Had an update about her....she is back on the floor again and won't get up :( vet is coming back out today and we will decide what is best for her. Even if there was a glimmer of hope I would hate to think she is suffering in any way. I always had a vision in my head where she would be old and grey and her last minutes would be spent with me, happy, where she belonged. Not 500 miles away with (to her) strangers and in a state so bad she is unable to stand. She owes me nothing and its unbearable knowing she is in such a state :'(
 
silvershoes said:
Yeah if it was 5mins down the road I would be there every day, but when its 500 miles its slightly different. I left December, thats when I last saw her. Then we had all the snow so we werent able to go, plus neither of us drive the lorry so we had to wait for our friend to be available and have the time off work.

So believe me if I had a sooner opportunity to go we would of. But thanks for sending my guilt trip on an even bigger trip.
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So you went up in a 3 horse lorry in December? A 7.5 tonne lorry can be driven on a car licence. I understand you run a livery yard so probably best to get transport issues sorted to avoid this in future.
 
Fellewell said:
So you went up in a 3 horse lorry in December? A 7.5 tonne lorry can be driven on a car licence. I understand you run a livery yard so probably best to get transport issues sorted to avoid this in future.
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Only if you are old enough to have grandfather rights actually :rolleyes:

And why should she need transport available at all times because she is livery yard owner??
 
Sorry to hear about your mare, hoping she makes a speedy recovery and is back home with you soon.

I had an accident which resulted in operations/totally out of action, sometimes as horse owners we have to rely our trust into other people to take due care of our animals. There are times that we just can't get down for weeks on end unfortunately.
 
OP I think you are being very harshly judged. If someone had a horse with a pro then they might very well not see it from one month to the next, that doesn't mean they should expect it not to be cared for. And this is no different. The person responsible for the horse clearly knew you were going away and that they were in charge of the horse's welfare.

I've just retired my horse, and you know what, it was 2 months before I went to see him, and he looked great. The whole point of him being on grass livery where he is is that I don't have the time to go and see him particularly often, and I trust the person who is looking after him - and rightly so.

I feel for you - I think people are being very very unfair. You were paying someone to do and job and they didn't do it.
 
Fellewell said:
So you went up in a 3 horse lorry in December? A 7.5 tonne lorry can be driven on a car licence. I understand you run a livery yard so probably best to get transport issues sorted to avoid this in future.
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Not when I'm only 23. I'm currently arranging to go through my HGV so it will be sorted. Its annoying as I can drive it, but just not legally! However if I knew she was in such a bad way I'd have risked the trip to go and get her!
 
Think you have every right to feel angry. You put everything in place to ensure care, but the person being paid failed in their job.

Your right, most horses can live out if properly cared for. I have a 3/4tb broodmare living out, not even rugged & she looks very well. One feed a day but plenty of haylage. It takes seconds to even run a hand under rugs to feel for warmth & condition. That she was being paid to care for your mare, she should have done so much more. Their laziness nearly cost you horse her life.
 
U poor thing. I can kinda sympathise as I have had similar sort of experience with my horse on full livery. Broke my heart and I still haven't forgiven myself. It's very easy to give all 'what ifs' and 'u should of'.... I hope ur horse gets back to full health. My cob actually declined quicker than I would of expected too!
 
Gosh some of you are unbelievable. If I was A friend trusted to look after someone's horse, and paid to do so, I would feel a bit put out if a third friend was sent to check up on me as some of you suggest should have happened!

If you pay for care, you should receive it. Poor horse, and poor OP- I hope the mare makes a recovery and you are not too upset by some of the judges on here.
 
Thanks for your answers OP, in which case I agree that the YO did not care for your horse adequately! I cannot understand why she did not inform you of her weightloss so that hard feed could be provided (as you would have done if she was with you) and/or appropriate veterinary checks done.

I hope she pulls through for you. x
 
If you had paid for her to be looked after etc, that's what should have been done!

I'm pretty sure if you could see into the future you would have walked her the 500 miles to save her from this dreadful situation!

It would be different if u asked her for a favor but paying someone to do a job they clearly didn't do is not on.

I do agree with some others that the incredible weight loss could also be down to underlying issue.
I'm definitely not excusing the yo for not making you aware of her state.
 
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