100% agree.
) after the EPM results I have a plan of sorts and it’s pretty much to do nothing until early next week unless something changes in his condition. I won’t bore you guys with the various reasons why but I’m comfortable with that but it ticks all the things to consider above. 
Wait and see is a good course of action. Big hugs as always
Re: Oklahoma city. That bridge thing is creepy
Thank you everyone and particularly ycbm I appreciate that because I do feel.. embarrassed to tell you all what’s happened, but I know you guys will support any decisions either way. It’s easy to get caught up because I know you think a lot of Atlas, as do I, so I’m trying to balance a few things. First up and most importantly is what’s fair to ask of the horse as really this is happening to him and not me, so I’ve been talking to the barn owner about this who’s very pragmatic. She seems to think he’s pretty cheerful and whatnot, being cheeky etc so that’s good. Maybe he seemed sad to me because whenever he sees me I’m syringing stuff into his mouth which he hates.
Secondly is what can I live with, because I have to work out what’s going to be worse- feeling like I’ve euthanized him without trying or continuing down this path where I know too well the likely outcome. And it’s traumatic, I am quite literally re tracing the steps I took with Boggle. I spent hours last night reading all the same stuff online that I’d read before. I’d have rather ANYTHING else to deal with. Colic, tendon, broken leg, anything. I feel like I’m coping with this reasonably in this moment despite the wildly varying emotions but that’s mostly because I’m not really allowing myself to feel it other than for short stints where I break for a minute. But I’m also applying a good British dose of “keep calm and carry on” which I think my American amigos are finding rather odd haha. Whether that’s healthy or not I don’t know but whatever, it’s functional.
Thirdly is cost. I spent what I spent on Boggle because he was my best mate, my horse of a lifetime, my absolute partner. I did it without pause or consideration and I don’t regret it whatsoever. The benefit I have this time is not having to get myself in a load of debt for any of it, as last time it was really pretty scary the amounts I had to finance. But being able to spend the money doesn’t mean you should! I don’t want to get carried away pouring money into a horse that is unlikely to have a good outcome so I’m trying to apply a little head over heart here. I have a cap in my head and it’s 5 figures which I already think is.. a lot for a horse I’ve owned a few months. Of course I’m a total idiot for not insuring him, but I said to myself if anything went seriously wrong I would not treat because this was just a cheap project pony. With insurance being over $1,000 a year it just seemed pointless when I was already ruling out things like colic surgery. I reckoned that self insuring was better with a tough little Morgan horse- ha. How wrong was I. But then it happens and of course everything changes and I look at his damn face and basically hand over a credit card. I was joking with the barn owner whilst we were waiting for the vet that he had a 2k max limit (the initial bill already nears that for all the tests etc!) and of course Atlas kept shoving his nostrils into my cheek like he does and blowing gently, so we were laughing about every time he did that being another few hundred bucks. He did it a lot, clever boy!
So with all that in mind and having taken a minute to pause (actually, I took an hour sitting on a bench with my arms wrapped around my body in the car rental center of Oklahoma City- don’t ever go there it’s a god awful place with absolutely no redeeming qualities
Hopefully my little Bog pony is going to send some luck our way from up there, and I guess in the meantime I’ll just assume this is all part of the crazy way the universe works and there’s reason behind it… right?
You guys are the best and once again I am very very very grateful that you aren’t totally sick of me by now because you’d have every right to put me on user ignore for being such a boring broken record.
Wait and see is a good course of action. Big hugs as always
Re: Oklahoma city. That bridge thing is creepy
@Peregrine Falcon has experience, i have tagged her in.
Very briefly I can see it has a good outcome. Can cause neuro symptoms. Not always .