I just bought my first cob! Introduction + feed advice + photos!

[AmyMay]

I did it, left the property with my friend riding Rigs and me on BH. Just around the block, but I have been out now. Rigs was fine, a couple of little coughs but nothing bad. He seemed to enjoy the walk out.

I have looked round the place and I see so much that needs doing. Looking back, David had been struggling for a long time, blaming it on age, and I kept saying I would simply get a contractor in, but he took offence at that and said he would do it when he felt better. But it simply hasn't got done. We have moles, weeds, loads needs strimming and cutting. Fences need upgrading. It is all on my list.

This afternoon a friend called round. She did indeed check out the horses/stables etc to make sure I was managing. I am humbled that she cares enough to drive to the next county to make sure we are all safe. Happily, the beds are immaculate, the fields poo picked, waters fresh etc and both boys look smart.

Apple and cream cake for lunch again.

I have found a funeral director. Had some more friends contact me. Found David's will. Anyone know a legal question? I thought I was the executor but it seems I am the beneficiary but two people who are already dead are the executors. How do I become an executor?

You’ll need a solicitor love to sort out how the will is now to be executed. Shouldn’t be complicated though xxxxx

 

[Red-1]

You’ll need a solicitor love to sort out how the will is now to be executed. Shouldn’t be complicated though xxxxx

I don't know, when David's mum died she didn't have a will and he did it, but did not need a solicitor. He was next of kin.

I seem to remember a forum member's husband is one. Is it @Andie02 ?

 

[AmyMay]

I don't know, when David's mum died she didn't have a will and he did it, but did not need a solicitor. He was next of kin.

It will depend on the value of the estate and in particular D’d assets. A quick call to your solicitor should make it clear.

 

[GoldenWillow]

I've just seen this, I am so, so sorry. Life is so precious and fragile. Take care xx

 

[Red-1]

It will depend on the value of the estate and in particular D’d assets. A quick call to your solicitor should make it clear.

I don't currently have one. When mum died the solicitor was awful. When David's mum died, it was a lot more complicated with property to sell, no will, more than one next of kin to inherit. He did it with no solicitor and it was done in half the time of mine, which was no property to sell, a will leaving everything to me and no issues, supposedly.

 

[teacups]

I don't currently have one. When mum died the solicitor was awful. When David's mum died, it was a lot more complicated with property to sell, no will, more than one next of kin to inherit. He did it with no solicitor and it was done in half the time of mine, which was no property to sell, a will leaving everything to me and no issues, supposedly.

I’m not completely sure but I think the main beneficiary (or beneficiaries) can step in to become executor and andminister the estate. I don’t know if you need a solicitor for that. You could call the probate people and ask: here is a link for the Leeds probate registry.

Leeds District Probate Registry - Find a Court or Tribunal - GOV.UK

Leeds District Probate Registry - Find contact details, opening times, how to get to here, types of cases managed, disabled access to the building

www.find-court-tribunal.service.gov.uk

You may not need probate depending on the value of the estate, but I’m sure they would help.

 

[Tracking_up]

And it may depend on how assets were owned. If owned jointly, it may be that the assets pass automatically to you. These pass 'outside' of the will, so no need for probate. Assets need to be held as 'joint tenants'. Happy to help if I can (solicitor but no longer practicing)

 

[Tracking_up]

First thing to do is write a list of everything David owned, who he owned it with, and any approx values.

If you want to look for a Solicitor, look at one that is STEP qualified (Society of Trust and Estate Practitioners), they are specialists in wills and probate etc.

 

[paddy555]

I have looked round the place and I see so much that needs doing. Looking back, David had been struggling for a long time, blaming it on age, and I kept saying I would simply get a contractor in, but he took offence at that and said he would do it when he felt better. But it simply hasn't got done. We have moles, weeds, loads needs strimming and cutting. Fences need upgrading. It is all on my list.



I have found a funeral director. Had some more friends contact me. Found David's will. Anyone know a legal question? I thought I was the executor but it seems I am the beneficiary but two people who are already dead are the executors. How do I become an executor?

I can appreciate how you feel looking at everything you think needs doing but don't forget that someone spending a day with a strimmer and mower can work wonders.

For the Will I guess you will need Letters of Administration with the will annexed depending on the situation of his assets.
You have a choice either do it yourself or a solicitor.

However before you do make any decision can I suggest that you list everything that David owned either on his own or jointly with you and it's approximate value(his share).. Are bank accounts and savings accounts in your joint names or did he have his own accounts. What about the property, anything else he had for example shares, other property.
Also if you are the sole beneficiary or if anyone else is involved.

also a list of his debts if any. That for example could be a mortgage or loan or anything else he owed. He may not have any.



Once you have this list of his assets etc which is the starting point then you will have a better idea. Maybe everything will be in joint names and probate won't be needed. If you decide to go to a solicitor take info this with you.

accounts in joint names you will just need to send the bank a copy of the death cert. and they will move it to your name. Get plenty of copies of the death cert.

 

[paddy555]

the other point that comes to mind, and I'm sure you have already thought of it, is insurance. House insurance and whose name the policy is in and any other insurance you may have. Insurance on David's car if you drive it. also DVLA re the car if you transfer ownership or sell. When I was in this position with my dad's car the existing insurance gave me 30 days grace to have my name on his policy even though he had died (without reinsuring it) to enable me to drive it home and sell it. Maybe worth talking to them.

 

[Red-1]

Wow, thank you all.

For one reason or another, the house is in my sole name. I wanted to make it joint in case I died first but he wouldn't hear of it. To prove that, do I go to the land registery, or I guess I better bottom out the filing cabinet and see if we have a document to that effect.

His car is a stupidly expensive new one on a PCP. I already sorted insurance as it was a large amount of money sat on the drive uninsured. My car company and his were Saga, and they have allowed me to take on the policy indefinitely, inheriting his no claims too.

The house insurance I also sorted on Friday. It is now in my sole name.

The horsebox insurance was in my name but paid by his account, which has been frozen. I have changed the method of payment to the joint account. I haven't yet touched that.

They were the biggies.

 

[View]

Red, so glad you went out for that ride today. Please keep taking baby steps - but don’t do too much in a day.

I recommend the Which book, something like The a which Guide to Wills and Probate. It got us through dealing with MiL’s estate - and the nightmare of finding out that she had never applied for Letters of Administration for FiL’s estate.

No solicitor involved, and OH was the sole beneficiary.

More virtual hugs.

 

[Andie02]

Red, so glad you went out for that ride today. Please keep taking baby steps - but don’t do too much in a day.

I recommend the Which book, something like The a which Guide to Wills and Probate. It got us through dealing with MiL’s estate - and the nightmare of finding out that she had never applied for Letters of Administration for FiL’s estate.

No solicitor involved, and OH was the sole beneficiary.

More virtual hugs.

Which guide to Wills & Probate.....definitely NOT advisable !!!

A professional who specialises in Wills and Probate is the way to go, who can discuss the individual circumstances and provide the correct advice.

 

[AmyMay]

Depending on how long David had the new car, the dealer may be prepared to take it back (under the circumstances).

 

[teacups]

A professional who specialises in Wills and Probate is the way to go, who can discuss the individual circumstances and provide the correct advice.

With all due respect, I would disagree. It is perfectly possibly to deal with it yourself, especially if the estate is simple and there are no complicating circumstances. You might want someone else to deal with it all for you, but that is a separate issue.
If the family home is not part of the estate, it just depends on what else is part of what is to be passed on, and whether probate is required or not.

ETA No comment on the Which guide - I've never seen it so no idea if it is any good or not.

 

[paddy555]

e but paid by his account, which has been frozen.

not all banks require probate to close an account. There is no uniformity, they all have different rules and limits on the balance. Nationwide for example allow up to 50K on the death cert. and evidence of your relationship to David. With other banks it is a lower limit. Of course you may need probate for other reasons.

 

[w1bbler]

Oh, and if you haven't sorted the death certificate yet, get more copies than you think you'll need. It feels like everyone wants to see a certified copy & they take an age to send them back.

 

[Red-1]

A photo of me, actually getting on BH to go for our short ride, and Rigsby, doing a grand job of escort.

 

[Emilieu]

Pleased you went well done. One foot in front of the other, keep going.

 

[Tracking_up]

Someone after my own heart (and my horse's!) giving a treat once on!

Well done for going out and braving the world. A day at a time......

 

[DiNozzo]

Red, I am the worst person at offering emotional support, but I can offer some practical. When dealing with companies, check who is the account holder. If it was David, then ask for the bereavement process. This should transfer you to a specially trained person (at banks and bigger companies anyway). If you are the account holder, but the bill was paid from his bank account, don't tell them that. Just say you need to change the payment details to yours (depending on probate).

 

[sky1000]

Well done for going on the ride. I hope you enjoyed it. I wouldn't worry about being rude to horrible people.
I do sometimes worry about the legal advice given on here by non qualified people, and in this particular situation I would hate it. It's a long time since I was at the college of law, but what paddy555 said is what I would have said

 

[sky1000]

And also tracking up is right about things owned as joint tenants (or was when I studied it)

 

[SilverLinings]

I have only just caught up with the last couple of days on this thread; what a horrific thing to happen to you @Red-1 . I am all too starkly aware that there is nothing on earth that I can write that will make you feel better or make the whole event 'un-happen', but I am thinking of you. It was always very clear on here what you thought of Mr Red, and as a determined spinster/aspiring recluse it was one of the very few relationships I have known of that has made me aware that truly good relationships do exist. I am so, so sad that you and he haven't been able to spend a long retirement together, and I can imagine that his loss feels huge and overwhelming right now.

You are an amazing, strong (although you may not feel like it at the moment) person being able to post about the lovely time you had out together on Tuesday, and to have already started on the practical tasks. It sounded like you and Mr Red had a great partnership, and it is a big thing to step up when half of the team is no longer there. It can be a good thing to keep busy and keep doing 'normal' things, but try to look after yourself too.

And if people are insensitive or rude then they deserve a blunt response with what you are going through at the moment, so don't feel guilty for not tiptoeing round the feelings of village acquaintances!

It is an amazing thing that you are still able to share stories about the good times you had together; I don't mean to sound trite, but try to hold onto those thoughts when you are having a particularly hard day, even though it may be difficult. I realise that you lost your mother fairly recently, but the loss of different people can hit us in different ways; there is no right or wrong way of feeling grief though.

I am so terribly sorry that you are having to go through this, and send you love and best wishes through tears. I hope that time eases the pain for you as quickly as possible. You have a lot of friends and well-wishers on here and we are here if you need to talk, or want to share memories of David.

 

[jojo5]

I am so, so sorry to hear of this and my thoughts are with you. I too, like a previous poster, am always awake at various times throughout the night so also around if you need to speak to someone.

 

[Red-1]

Thank you all. It helps knowing people are out there.

Monday. Today is Post Mortem day. I want to know what happened, although I presume it was a heart attack.

This morning, my lovely neighbour is coming with me on a bike ride. It will get me out the gates again and I can hide behind reflected cycle glasses. While I do that, her husband is going to mow the lawn as everything is overgrown as David had been feeling off colour and had been resting at weekends.

Lawnmower. I did try to mow our lawn last month, it is a battery one with wheels and he liked it but when I used it I injured my foot by the twisting and 6 weeks later still have nerve pain. So, I guess I will need a different one.

What type of lawnmower is easiest to use? It is a fairly flat lawn, not too big (I'm talking the house lawn, close to the house, fenced off for the dogs). Is a hover mower better? Do they actually hover? I am nearly 60 but quite weak in my back, hips, knees, ankles and especially feet. Shoulder, elbow and wrist too, truth be known. I am somewhat high mileage.

I could go to a shop to ask, but just think I would break down and not make any intelligible sense. If my lawn is cut by my neighbour today, I will have about 2 weeks to get set up.

Late morning, a friend's husband is coming to mend the fence better and also to take the bucket off the tractor so I can use it to cut the big grass. I will see how that goes. I also need to roll the patio of the horses' stable area as they are both barefoot and I like the bigger stones flattened into it weekly. I suspect the roller will be too much for me to get on as David used to struggle, but we will see. I may see if it can be attached and left on. It may be that I need to sell the tractor and get a more user friendly ride on lawnmower and small roller. I need to get it together to master the maintenance of this place.

Andi's husband has offered to chat with me so I can be more efficient in the legal department, which is so kind.

I suspect I will have run out of energy to ride today.

Thank you all again.

 

[SEL]

I did it, left the property with my friend riding Rigs and me on BH. Just around the block, but I have been out now. Rigs was fine, a couple of little coughs but nothing bad. He seemed to enjoy the walk out.

I have looked round the place and I see so much that needs doing. Looking back, David had been struggling for a long time, blaming it on age, and I kept saying I would simply get a contractor in, but he took offence at that and said he would do it when he felt better. But it simply hasn't got done. We have moles, weeds, loads needs strimming and cutting. Fences need upgrading. It is all on my list.

I have found a funeral director. Had some more friends contact me. Found David's will. Anyone know a legal question? I thought I was the executor but it seems I am the beneficiary but two people who are already dead are the executors. How do I become an executor?

Great that you got out on BH - riding is good for the soul, especially for those of us who are addicted to the smell of horse. Your garden sounds much like mine which has grown into a wilderness in the past month. Is there a local gardener you could pay to come and just tidy it up for you? A lawn cut and strim makes everything look better. Try not to let the garden stress you out - it can be sorted.

I think you'll need to find a local solicitor for the point on the executor though. Those are the annoying issues that require paperwork and that one sounds a bit complex. ETA Andi's husband is a superstar

Xx

 

[Red-1]

Great that you got out on BH - riding is good for the soul, especially for those of us who are addicted to the smell of horse. Your garden sounds much like mine which has grown into a wilderness in the past month. Is there a local gardener you could pay to come and just tidy it up for you? A lawn cut and strim makes everything look better. Try not to let the garden stress you out - it can be sorted.

I think you'll need to find a local solicitor for the point on the executor though. Those are the annoying issues that require paperwork and that one sounds a bit complex. ETA Andi's husband is a superstar

Xx

I sat down and actually read the will last night, as opposed to skim reading. The first clause says that I am executor as long as I survive 3 months. The other clauses naming other people are only to be enacted if I don't so it is a simple will in reality.

I will speak with Andi's husband, it is a kind offer.

The local gardener retired 2 months ago, his client base has flocked to any others. It may be tricky but I will give it a go. I may have another go with our lawnmower and just be more careful. It is so long right now, I struggle to find the dog poo!

 

[cauda equina]

I have a fairly basic Bosch corded mower which is as gutsy as anything (it cuts through all sorts of long and stringy stuff) and is dead easy to use, except for the faff of remembering not to run over the cord and moving the plug around
I can't remember how much it cost, it came from B&Q some years ago

I also have a little tractor - Massey Fergusson with a built in cutting deck - and a Westwood ride on mower
The Westwood is much much easier in terms of maintenance and general use than the MF. It doesn't tow but I think some ride on mowers do

I hope the bike ride goes well and that your weather is better than mine!

 

[AmyMay]

If your garden lawn is small, how about one of those robot lawn mowers?