Taking horse back off loan

[ycbm]

No, you didn't literally only say that, you gave another user stick for doing something perfectly reasonable, using what was at the time the first word of your user name. Just own it, perhaps even apologise to Throwawayaccount, and the discussion will stop.

Also if you’re going to use my name i should know yours ?

I have a right to be not called specifically by my name

.

 

[JBM]

No, you didn't literally only say that, you gave another user stick for doing something perfectly reasonable, using what was at the time the first word of your user name. Just own it, perhaps even apologise to Throwawayaccount, and the discussion will stop.
.

The second quote isn’t even in response to throwawayaccount your just picking sentences to mould your view
Still don’t understand why you have such a problem with this when we dropped the conversation hours ago
You’re the only one still bothered

 

[honetpot]

I literally only said I didn’t want to be referred to by my first name

Hate to picky, but how is anyone to know this, until you tell them, and why in an informal situation like a forum is this bad manners?
If I introduce my self as X anywhere, so people start using X, or forums you often mark remarks for X as @X, how do they know to call you Y?
You have certainly made this thread memorable, and yes hours later my comment, just been watching the last ep of Alice in Borderland, and I need the diversion.

 

[JBM]

Hate to picky, but how is anyone to know this, until you tell them, and why in an informal situation like a forum is this bad manners?
If I introduce my self as X anywhere, so people start using X, or forums you often mark remarks for X as @X, how do they know to call you Y?
You have certainly made this thread memorable, and yes hours later my comment, just been watching the last ep of Alice in Borderland, and I need the diversion.

that was me saying it and literally everyone but the person I was talking to is making this into a much bigger deal than it needs to be
The only reason this thread is memorable is because people who weren’t even in the conversation have to add their 2 cents in every hour ?
No longer replying to this thread literally no reason to still be on this topic

 

[Caol Ila]

that was me saying it and literally everyone but the person I was talking to is making this into a much bigger deal than it needs to be
The only reason this thread is memorable is because people who weren’t even in the conversation have to add their 2 cents in every hour ?
No longer replying to this thread literally no reason to still be on this topic

The most futile way on this forum (or any forum) to get people to stop talking about a thing is to repeatedly ask them to stop talking about it. More than likely, it will have the opposite effect. Case in point. It’s one of those fundamental laws of the internet, along with Godwin’s law.

 

[Lois Lame]

I have now had a message apologising for the outburst and can she share him from me…..

I'm glad.

 

[Lois Lame]

I really don't like this idea of 'keeping her [the loaner] sweet'. Icch. Manipulative. 'Orrid.

If she were a psychopath, then yes, I'd do that. But not for a normal, emotional type. It's just not nice.

I hope everything turns out nicely. It's up to both of you.
[Leaps off grandstand]

 

[Lois Lame]

Oh for flip's sake, your username is literally Katie&Judy!

Ha ha.
Sorry, couldn't resist.
But, you can't always be sure. On a gardening forum I'm on, someone called Rob became irate she was referred to as a man. According to her, she's clearly female. "Look at my avatar," she typed. The avatar was of a young woman with a young child. As another poster rightly pointed out, in that case, IRL, he must be a falcon.

Anyhow, back to the drama.

 

[Lois Lame]

And delete Hashrouge’s post that you quoted as it outs you despite the change of username!

No, don't do that. A few of us got a really good laugh out of that, and laughter is a great thing.

 

[KittenInTheTree]

Ha ha.
Sorry, couldn't resist.
But, you can't always be sure. On a gardening forum I'm on, someone called Rob became irate she was referred to as a man. According to her, she's clearly female. "Look at my avatar," she typed. The avatar was of a young woman with a young child. As another poster rightly pointed out, in that case, IRL, he must be a falcon.

Anyhow, back to the drama.

In this case, I presumed that throwaway was just shortening the username Katie&Judy to Katie, the same way I sometimes get called Kitten or KITT.

 

[honetpot]

that was me saying it and literally everyone but the person I was talking to is making this into a much bigger deal than it needs to be
The only reason this thread is memorable is because people who weren’t even in the conversation have to add their 2 cents in every hour ?
No longer replying to this thread literally no reason to still be on this topic

You just need to say nothing, and change it to what you like people to refer to you as. Just say nothing....... In RL I often get called by the wrong name, I say nothing, because the chances are I will never speak to them again.

 

[Christmascinnamoncookie]

Blimey, glad I’ve been really involved in work today. Bonkers.

 

[mariew]

Blimey, glad I’ve been really involved in work today. Bonkers.

Lol me too. I thought I'd ended up in some other thread and h&h had gone wrong

 

[Barton Bounty]

@TheChestnutThing

Have you got a day to collect your boy yet ?

 

[Christmascinnamoncookie]

Lol me too. I thought I'd ended up in some other thread and h&h had gone wrong

Careful, people will start using your name! ?

 

[Red-1]

Crikey, I often am referred to as Red on here, as opposed to Red-1.

Maybe I should get upset?

FWIW, I think people have kept mentioning it as it was a reasonable thing to do, then you responded rudely, and there was no apology. Still no apology. Still no apology. So people have kept mentioning how it was a reasonable thing to do.

FWIW, until you specifically mentioned it was your name, I thought both names on your profile were pets' names. But now I know.

Please note, no names have been reproduced by me, as requested by the person who is now initials.

It is hard to keep up.

 

[Fjord]

I just want to know if the OP is OK and how her horse is?

 

[Arzada]

Crikey, I often am referred to as Red on here, as opposed to Red-1.

Maybe I should get upset?

Only if the first part of your name, ie Red, is literally your actual name

 

[Lois Lame]

Trying to remember what this thread was about ...

That gave me two snorts this morning.

 

[Lois Lame]

You complained completely unseasonably about someone using your given name, which happened also to be the first word of your user name. I don't know how old you are, you've given more than one age on this forum I think, but I do think you need to grow up.
.

No, come on YCBM (also known as YMCA on some threads, probably due to misbehaving mobiles). Some of us have had a great laugh.

JBM (whatever her real name might be IRL) was only as silly as the rest of us can be at times.

 

[JBM]

Honestly guys I really love this forum sometimes but your inability to let stuff go is astounding I’m taking a break from this forum as you’ve literally reduced me to crying on my couch with how rude some of your comments are
Repeatedly berating someone isn’t funny but im glad everyone is having a laugh
Goodbye

 

[CanteringCarrot]

I'm probably being an a**hole but ima just say, this is a weird flex.

 

[Caol Ila]

I'm probably being an a**hole but ima just say, this is a weird flex.

Yet at the same time, it is all pretty pedestrian compared to the high drama of the COTH dressage forum. That sh1t's better than HBO.

 

[Lois Lame]

My laughing is not at you JBM, it's about the situation. In fact, I wouldn't like someone being called by their real name either, and some people do this and I don't think it's right.

Now before anyone puts a contract on me, I just want to say that I appreciate the sentiments that some have expressed etcetera, etcetera, but I can see why JBM is in tears because, blah blah, and I don't want that to be the case. Come on back, JBM, let the others have the last word (and I'm not trying to have the last word here). They are all so old they'll have forgotten about the whole thing in a week or two.

 

[Red-1]

Only if the first part of your name, ie Red, is literally your actual name

But how was anyone to know that it was her real name?

If JBM had just said sorry, it would have blown right over.

As far as HHO goes, I think we are pretty self regulating. If someone is rude to another, then it is pointed out to them. If they apologise and move on, then that is that. Being rude to others who pointed put you maybe misinterpreted a seemingly innocent mistake and were rude, and then directing people to let you have the last word is never going to work.

Besides that point, there is a more important one.

My laughing is not at you JBM, it's about the situation. In fact, I wouldn't like someone being called by their real name either, and some people do this and I don't think it's right.

Now before anyone puts a contract on me, I just want to say that I appreciate the sentiments that some have expressed etcetera, etcetera, but I can see why JBM is in tears because, blah blah, and I don't want that to be the case. Come on back, JBM, let the others have the last word (and I'm not trying to have the last word here). They are all so old they'll have forgotten about the whole thing in a week or two.

I would also say that many of us are older, and it is not such a funny quip to berate our memories, especially while some of us are battling dementia in families. @Lois Lame would not know if a member is battling it themselves. In fact, this is not just my opinion, this is the law...

Under the Equality Act and the Disability Discrimination Act, people with dementia have a legal right to be protected from discrimination: at work in education as a consumer when using public services eg transport when buying/renting property as a member/guest of a private club or association.

That is worse than being unreasonably rude because someone unwittingly shortened your username and you were rude about it.

If you did not mean dementia specifically, then I apologise for making that connection, but would like to point out that age is itself a protected characteristic in itself, and derogating a whole swathe of HHO members as being likely to forget merely due to a protected characteristic is also against the law. It is the belittling of older people because of a protected characteristic that is really unfair and unlawful.

I think the reason this site is not as bad as others is because people don't hesitate to pull people up if they are rude. It does not generally turn to mud slinging.

I can see why JBM is crying, but would also say that if being pulled up on being rude and not apologising, then being rude to others and complaining that it is unreasonable to be pulled up on that, then when people haven't stopped being rather confused about a thread being derailed by something that seems illogical, it is enough to cry into the sofa, then maybe stepping back and re-evaluating is a good idea.

 

[Barton Bounty]

No wonder the OP doesnt want to comment on her own thread to update! The same coals are being dragged over …

Cmon folks back to the original conversation instead of 4 pages of waffle! 3 times have tried changing the subject and asking the poster!
It just shows how petty and immature people are

 

[ycbm]

No, come on YCBM (also known as YMCA on some threads, probably due to misbehaving mobiles). Some of us have had a great laugh.

I don't find it funny to use a person's real name when they don't want it used, or to fail to apologise when you have mistakenly criticised someone unfairly. I don't get what you find remotely funny about this thread sidetrack.

 

[PinkvSantaboots]

Thing is if you put your real name in your user name people will use it you can't get upset about just don't do it.

 

[Getbackboys]

it is so sad for both parties, clearly all very emotional with mistakes made on both sides, neither of you is innocent. i would say her outburst clearly comes from being upset she is going to lose something she has fallen in love with, we are all aware of how that feels. got get your horse….

i hope the loaner now gets her own horse or gives up horses or becomes hard and learns not to fall in love, sorry i feel for her.

been in her shoes many years ago rode a horse belonged to an elderly gent hunted it and it won point to pointing asked if he could be mine was told no, he then fell of the horse so he gave it to a racing yard and it died, wtf, can you imagine how i felt, ie the word karma comes into it, karma is a real thing worth keeping in mind in every activity we do in life all of us

 

[Tiddlypom]

Thing is if you put your real name in your user name people will use it you can't get upset about just don't do it.

This. It's one of the funniest thread diversions yet on HHO. User gets upset because another poster refers to them by part of their username. We'd have all been oblivious to that indignant poster's real name if she hadn't made such a fuss about it.